The Value of a Life
by Ncham9
Summary: Alternate Universe, inspired mostly by Kellylad13, still no good at summaries. High school changed Humphrey. He's drifting away from his normal, fun-loving self. An old friend reteaches him what normal is, but what if he needs something more from her? Either way, she's driving him insane.
1. Checked Out

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 1 _Checked Out_

 **A/N:** **This is the first chapter of my newest story,** _ **The Value of Life**_ **. It is a high school alternate universe love story between Kate and Humphrey. I imagine the characters, the only oc of which so far is Charlie, to be humans but I will not hate you if you imagine them as wolves or anthro wolves. I only made them as people because I think anthro wolves are unnecessarily confusing. I'm not hating on the stories or the writers that have them (This story is inspired by a few, Kellylad13 mostly). It will probably be more from the perspective of Humphrey (sorry to you female viewers if you can't relate, though I doubt that you exist. If you do, please tell me. I would love to hear a female perspective on my story). Anyways, the story…unless you came here just for my author's notes. In that case, welcome all the same.**

(Humphrey's POV)

I awoke to the sound of a loud ringing that seemed to bounce around the walls of my skull. My eyes opened so that I could make sense of the noise. I looked onto the desk that was adjacent to my bed, and to the alarm clock that rested on it, spewing its racket at me. I turned it off saying, "God I hate that sound.". It wasn't that I didn't like to get up early, although I did despise the idea, I just really do not like that alarm sound. It sets me on edge. I was actually on edge a lot lately. I say lately, I mean the past two years of my life in high school. The first day of junior year was not looking optimistic.

I slowly dragged my sixteen year-old body out of bed. I walked to my shower in my underwear, feeling dead inside as I climbed in, obviously after undressing. The shower was quick, but unenergetic. I walked out of the bathroom, after brushing my teeth, clothed only by a towel around my waist. Back in my room, I put on fresh boxers, a light blue t-shirt, blue jeans, and socks. I walked out of my room and downstairs, into the kitchen.

Sitting in the kitchen, I saw my sister, Charlie (short for Charlotte) eating breakfast.

"Morning sleepy head." she said as she took a break from her frosted flakes to talk. She smiled happily. I put on a fake smile, although its emptiness kind of hurt me.

"Good morning Charlie." I said, walking over to her and giving her a hug. We weren't all that close but I did love her all the same.

"You look nice today." I said. It was true but I didn't really mean it. She was beautiful, and even I as her brother could see it. She was 5'11", a few inches shorter than me at 6'3", even though she was almost a whole year older. She was well proportioned and had a symmetric, unblemished face, with long brown hair.

"Are you saying I don't look nice every day?" She asked sarcastically.

"Just take the stupid compliment." I replied, chuckling a little at her sarcasm.

"Thank you." She said. "You look good today too." She continued. I don't know how much truth there was to that. I was tall and had tanned, unmarked skin, apart from a scar on my back from a bicycle accident a few years ago, but it wasn't that big and was hidden most of the time. I also had a fairly muscular build, with visible veins running out from under my shirt, down my forearms and onto the back of my hands. I didn't work out much apart from a short run every day. I guess my body sort of evened out over time. All this being said, I still wouldn't really call myself handsome, and it seemed like most of the girls that I met agreed. I didn't get a whole lot of attention from them, even though a lot of them were fairly good friends.

Pulling myself out of my own thoughts and back to what I was doing, I let go of Charlie, who didn't seem to mind the kind of long hug, and made my way to the fridge. Opening it, I grabbed our milk and set it down on the counter. I poured myself a cup of the coffee that Charlie had made; put the milk and some sugar into it, and took a long sip.

"Thanks." I said. When she turned around to say 'What for?', I pointed to my coffee mug. She smiled at me and turned back around to her breakfast. She knows that I cannot do anything in the morning without this coffee. After downing it quickly, I grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge. I walked out of the kitchen and put one on the counter next to Charlie on my way.

"You should really eat something." She said. I didn't have much of an appetite lately either. Maybe that more explains my fitness.

"Nah." I said. She gave up, knowing that I wasn't going to.

The other water bottle, I placed in my backpack, which was leaning against the wall by the front door. My black and blue Nike shoes were also there, so I put them on. Out of my backpack, I grabbed my phone, wallet, and keys, and put them in my pockets.

I walked back into the kitchen to grab a pack of gum off of the counter that encircled the room and saw Charlie working on the last bit of her cereal.

"I'm walking to school. Coming with?" I asked. We could drive there but I didn't feel like wasting the gas. I drive a red Ford Mustang 2015 and it isn't the most efficient of vehicles. Charlie doesn't have a car because she doesn't like to drive. She usually just bums a ride from me or one of her friends. Anyway, school wasn't that far away. Both Charlie and I went to Jasper High School, as it is the only high school in Jasper.

"Yeah, just a sec." She answered with food in her mouth.

"K" I said as I pulled out my phone and waited. I turned it on and looked at the screen. I didn't have any messages. 'Sounds about right.' I thought. I returned my phone to my pocket and heard Charlie scooping up the last bites of her cereal before putting her bowl in the sink. She quickly went to the door, put on her shoes, collected her backpack and walked out of the door. I followed behind at a much less energetic pace as I picked up my backpack and walked outside. She was waiting there for me. As we walked the twenty minute trek to school, I remained quiet, occasionally looking at my phone for the time. We were going to be about twenty minutes early.

"So are you excited about junior year?" she asked in an attempt to dissipate the awkward silence.

"Meh." I responded dully. I didn't really feel like talking and I rarely ever did.

"Okay whatever. I tried." She said in exasperation.

"Sorry." I responded. I wasn't trying to make her mad or anything, just not much of a conversationalist.

"It's fine." She said as she pulled out her own phone and put her headphones in to listen to music. The rest of the walk was spent in silence, apart from the music that she was playing too loudly in her earphones. It annoyed me. 'You're just edgy.' I thought to myself, trying not to rip the earphones from her head and yell at her. It worked for long enough for us to make it to school.

Walking through the school's main doors, I said 'Later' to Charlie and walked away from her, down an opposite hallway from hers. On my way down the hallway to my locker, I saw my group of three friends, Salty, Shaky, and Mooch. Salty was, a short, dark haired guy, wearing cargo shorts and a t-shirt. Shakey was much taller but rather lanky in appearance. He was wearing skinny jeans and a hoodie. Finally Mooch was a rather over-weight guy, who was sloppily dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie.

As I walked by, Salty said, "Hey Humphrey.". He seemed sort of downtrodden to see me. It was the appropriate response because ever since about the second half of freshman year, I grew away from them. I still considered them my friends and harbored no resentment, but I enjoyed their company less and less. This year I didn't even talk to any of them all summer. I was a miserable person so why would I want them to partake in that?

"Hey.' I responded to all of them, blankly and bluntly as I kept walking. They didn't follow me, knowing that I wasn't going to be great company and that is kind of what I wanted. I didn't really feel like talking to anyone anyway.

I continued beyond them to my locker. Finally reaching it, I opened the lock and inside place my phone, keys and wallet, as to not lose them throughout the day. I had become very forgetful as of late as well.

I was staring off into space with my locker door hanging open. I wasn't really thinking about anything. It was just blank, empty thought. While looking off to my left and staring, I noticed a girl, standing in the middle of the hallway, looking at the classroom numbers. She was wearing a grey shirt, with the neck intentionally cut so large that it only hung off of one shoulder. It was cut kind of high so that when she stood on the tips of her toes to see over people's heads to see the room number, it revealed a couple of inches of the small of her back. She also had on a pair of skinny blue jeans and a pink backpack.

Something about this girl seemed oddly familiar, as if I recognized her long, blonde, wavy hair that flowed effortlessly down her back, or maybe the way she stood, at 5'9" or 10", or just something else about her that would bear recognizing. All that I knew for sure was that she seemed lost.

I shut my locker door and walked over to her. Once I reached her, I tapped her on the shoulder lightly so that she would turn around to face me.

I asked politely, "Excuse me miss, can I ask you something?"

"Umm sure." she answered before turning around fully. When she did she stared at me kind of weird.

"Firstly, do you need help, and secondly, do I know you from somewhere?" I asked, in an attempt to both satisfy my curiosity and provide her some help, something I still liked to do, even though I had become quite the antisocialist.

"Humphrey?" she said, confirming my suspicion that I had seen her before. As she said my name, though, something in my mind clicked. The voice was extraordinarily familiar to me. I raked my mind for a memory of who this girl was. Suddenly I remembered.

"Kate? Kate Williams, is that you?" I asked. Kate had been my best friend from middle school, but before we got to ninth grade, her family moved out of state somewhere, New York I think. It wasn't far from this New Jersey town of Jasper, but it was still a couple of hours' drive. I hadn't seen her since she left.

She beamed a smile at me and closed the small gap between us, giving me a big hug. Of course I returned it. As we stood there embracing, I heard a few exaggerated 'Oooooohhh's from the students around us.

"Oh, shut up" I said to them, not that angrily. Sure it was a bit annoying but I didn't really care. Kate, however, looked like she might have. As soon as she heard them, she let go of me and had a very embarrassed blush on her face. It was pretty endearing.

"Sorry." She muttered.

"Don't worry about it. I don't really mind them." I said as I pointed over my shoulder to the people walking by us. I continued, "Hey so what gives. Why are you back in Jasper?".

"Oh umm, my dad's job is letting him work from home a lot more and he said he liked Jersey better so we moved back."

"That's great."

"Wow, Humphrey. You really filled out." She said, walking in a circle around me.

"Thanks. You too. Can you stop checking me out though?" I said in my usual, sarcastic way. It kind of runs in my family.

"Sorry." She said, returning to my front with that same blush and a emitting a nervous laugh. 'Why is she so embarrassed?' I thought. 'Was she actually checking me out?'

"It's alright." I said, trying to relieve the tension. "So…umm…do you need help finding your classes?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah actually. Here." She said as she handed me her schedule. When I saw it, I did a double take. She had almost the exact same classes as me. We had our first four together, then I had computer science and she had an acting class, then we both had lunch and our last two periods together.

"Cool. You have most of the same classes that I do. You wouldn't be stalking me now, would you?" I said, again sarcastically. She laughed and playfully pushed my shoulder. I continued, "In all seriousness, it is pretty good that we share all these classes. It's gotta be rough being new, especially here. This isn't the most nurturing of environments, since the only people that came here from our middle school are Salty, Shaky, and Mooch."

"Sounds good for you. You've got all your friends." She said.

"Yeah…" I responded plainly. It wasn't really worth telling her how they weren't really my friends anymore. Not to mention that I really don't like to make people feel sorry for me. I hate to be such a downer. That's why I put on a brave face every morning when I see people.

"So…should we get to class yet?" she asked me, pulling me from my contemplations.

"Umm, yeah let's go."

"Alright. Lead the way." she said. I walked her to our first period, Calculus. As we walked, I found it hard not to notice the sway in Kate's hips as she walked. She was so sexy. I tried to not think about her like that. I don't see women as just sexual objects for my viewing pleasure, but man did she look great. Her chest had grown out nicely, her hips were perfectly wide enough, and God did her ass look fantastic. There I go again. No harm was really done by these thoughts; I was just really appreciating how beautiful Kate is.

"Now you're checking me out." Kate said smugly, interrupting my thoughts yet again.

"Huh? Oh, no I was uh just thinking y'know. Sorry." I said embarrassed and only half lying. I was checking her out but I was thinking about it a lot too. The kids that were in the hall with us gave me a 'Really?' look. I tried to ignore it.

"Uh-huh." She said smiling in that same smug way.

"Whatever." I said laughing. That laugh felt really weird to me. It was really genuine and happy, something that hadn't come from a laugh or a smile in a long time. Maybe today would be a good day, unlike the crap streak that I have had the past two years.

We walked the rest of the way to Calculus class in silence. It didn't feel like an empty silence, though. It was more like that nothing needed to be said; we were just enjoying each other's company, rather than just being devoid of talking.

(Time skip: the middle of Calculus class)

Because it was the first day of class, the teacher just gave a short orientation on what was expected from us, what to expect from class, and handed us a curriculum of the homework for the year. She said it was 'subject to additions' which sounded ominous. After that she gave us the rest of the period off. I didn't mind the speech, although it was ungodly boring. It was made much better by the fact that I had Kate sitting next to me because of alphabetical order. Her surname is Williams and mine is Wilson.

"So Humphrey how's your sister?" Kate asked, breaking the silence that I was enjoying but talking to her was just as good.

"A pain in my ass, but she's good. She's a senior now." I said, making it seem like I was joking more than I was. It got a laugh out of Kate. In return I asked, "How's your sister? She ought to be in what, ninth grade now? What was her name? Lilith? Lillian?". I was struggling to remember it.

"Lily. She's good. Yeah she's a freshman now. It's weird how old she's getting. Can you believe that she was born after 2000?" Kate said.

"No. That is weird." I answered. After saying this, I closed my eyes and leaned my head backward. I couldn't actually sleep now because of the caffeine from the coffee, but I was going to give my eyes some rest. I was growing tired of the conversation, not because Kate is boring, but because I was losing my ability to hold one for any duration of time. Nodding off to sleep was the only tactful way of ending the conversation. I was, however, really enjoying having Kate sit next to me. She didn't seem to mind me not talking, and in fact, she went to sleep as well, after letting out a long, relaxed sigh. I calmly sat in my seat with my eyes closed, waiting for the bell to ring. When it did, I stood up, grabbed my bag, and looked back at Kate. She was still asleep. She looked really pretty and peaceful as she slept. We did have to go, so I regretfully woke her up.

Softly, I said, "Kate. It's time to go.".

"Hmmm?" she groaned as she stretched her tired muscles and opened her eyes to look at me. Man, those amber orbs that she called eyes were gorgeous. They looked so bright and happy. I wish I could say the same about mine. To me, they always looked like a cold and dead icy blue.

"Come on Kate. Let's get to second period." I said as I picked up her pink backpack and slung it over my right shoulder. It wasn't very heavy and I didn't mind being seen with that color. It was the gentlemanly thing to do. She got up slowly and admittedly, looked very tired.

"Ok." She responded as she walked with me, out of the classroom. When we made it into the hallway, she wrapped her arms around my left arm and rested her head against it. She closed her eyes as well. As much as I wanted to believe that it meant more, I knew it was just so that she could close her eyes and not walk into things. 'Why did I want it to be more?' I thought. I questioned whether or not I had a crush on her. I wasn't sure, but it seemed reasonable to. She was very attractive and from our previous friendship I knew that she was kind, generous, confident, and most importantly that we got along very well. Anyway, while I was walking her to our next class, English, I resisted a powerful urge to run her into lockers, doors, and the like. I thought maybe she wouldn't like it that much, but it would be funny.

(Time skip: fourth period)

The next two periods had gone much like the first, where there were ten minutes of speeches and then there was free time. During the presentations, Kate barely managed to stay awake, resting her face on her hand the whole time, much to my amusement. After both of which, she fully went to sleep. I kept carrying her stuff between classes. I didn't mind and she seemed to appreciate it.

It was fourth period (physics) now and our physics teacher, Ms. Smith, had just finished her orientation and distributing of curriculums. I liked this classroom. Instead of the normal, one person desks that the others had, this classroom had lab tables, which seated two people. This meant that I got to sit at the same table as Kate, which I was a fan of. Speaking of whom, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Kate was lifting her head off of her hand and was slowly putting it onto the desk.

"You really are tired huh?" I asked her when she began her motion.

"Mhmm." She answered, obviously tiredly. With a smile she said "Goodnight Humphrey.". I thought the way she said it was very cute and I laughed that same genuine laugh again.

"Sweet dreams Kate." I replied. Finally completing the resting of her head, she laid it down on my arm, which had been lying on the table. It surprised me even though it was really no different than when we were walking in the hall. Still, I wasn't expecting it, but I made no objections. It was actually quite comforting to have her this close and I was happy to help in anyway. Speaking of being close, she was actually close enough for me to smell her perfume. It wasn't particularly noticeable, but if you had noticed it, you would have called it sweet and definitely feminine. I liked it.

At this moment I felt her soft breathing on my forearm. It wasn't as annoying as it sounds. It was actually making me want to sleep too. Well, what I _really_ wanted was to lay my head down against hers and kiss her an actual goodnight. Why was I thinking like that so much? I should go and have a talk with my psychologist about this. Ugh, my psychologist. I liked her as a person but it is always really depressing to go and see her to talk about, well, my depression. I have felt this way for the past two years. She says that it is because of all the stress involved in high school and everything, but we're still not entirely sure. Today felt better than most though.

Anyways, because I couldn't really go to sleep, I elected to just stare at the wall and have a long think, about Kate, my life, and everything in general. I do this a lot. I catch myself just sitting still for a half of an hour, blankly staring at something. Most of the time I'm thinking, but sometimes, when I'm having more of a bad day with my depression, I just stare with nothing. My thoughts would be completely empty. Those days are the worst.

(Time skip: end of period)

The bell rang, but this time the sound of the other students leaving was enough to wake Kate. She got up, off my arm, still evidently tired but it looked like her naps had helped. I got up too, put my backpack on, and once again lifted hers. Then I realized that our next classes were different. As Kate stood up, she once again stretched her muscles and looked at me.

"Morning Humphrey." Kate joked.

"Morning Kate. How was your sleep?" I asked, laughing

"Surprisingly good. This desk is softer than it looks."

"Oh yeah?" I asked sarcastically, holding up my arm, showing the slight, red pressure mark that was on my arm were she had her head, and laughing.

"Oh, I'm sorry Humphrey. Look I got some makeup on you and now you'll smell like my perfume." Kate said rubbing my arm in an attempt to get the substance which I believe is known as blush off of me. I only laughed some more.

"Kate that's like the third time you've apologized today and you still didn't do anything wrong. Don't worry about it. I'll wash this off and I don't mind the smell. You actually smell really nice." I said. Oh God! I hope that didn't come out as weird as I thought it did. She laughed at the stunned expression that I had when I realized what I had said.

"Thank you. You smell good too. And for what it's worth, you make a really great pillow."

"I try." I said. We were rudely interrupted in our moment by Ms. Smith saying 'You guys should get to class.'

Looking back from the teacher and to Kate, I said, "She is right. We should get going. So, your next class is three doors down the hallway on the right and mine is a little bit up the hallway." I held up her backpack, as to help her get her arms through the straps. "After fifth period is lunch. I'll come down to your class and pick you up and then we can go. Sound good?" I said as we walked out of the classroom.

"Sounds great. And Humphrey, thanks for everything." Kate said, hugging me as the last sentence was voiced. I hugged her back. We might have gotten a few more 'Ooohhh's this time but I didn't pay any attention to the people around me. I was just enjoying the contact that I had with her.

We broke it and I said, "You're welcome. I'll talk to you later.". She began to walk away, but before she got too far, I said "And Kate, try not to get into trouble for falling asleep."

She turned around, smiling, and said "Oh haha." before walking away.

The next forty minutes of my life were spent in computer science, playing video games while the teacher was telling me how boring his class was going to be. All that I could think about was Kate and how much I was looking forward to seeing her again. While she was gone, my face went back to its usual way of feeling as if it weighed a ton and I couldn't bring it up to smile if I tried.

After that monotony of a class was over, I went to pick up Kate at her class. She was there waiting for me, as expected.

"You ready to go?" I asked politely.

"Yeah, but umm…can my sister sit with us?"

"Sure. Lily's cool and I normally sit alone or with my sister anyway."

"Thanks. If I can see her in the cafeteria, I'll wave her down."

When we got into the cafeteria, I quickly got my food from the school menu and sat down at an empty table, as had become normal. Kate did the same and kept an eye out for Lily. Eventually she found her. Lily came over with her food and sat down across from Kate and I. Why Kate chose to sit right next to me when we had the whole table to ourselves is beyond me.

As Lily sat down, she said, "So Kate, who's you're guy friend?"

She answered, "Oh, Lily you remember Humphrey Wilson right?"

"What? That can't be him. Humphrey was that short, little boy in your grade in middle school." Lily said, although I'm pretty sure she believed Kate.

"Yeah what is up with that? Now you're like six inches taller than me." Kate asked me.

"Growth spurt? How would I know? I was convinced this whole time that everyone around me was shrinking." I said jokingly. I noticed that Lily's body had matured also, but not to the same degree as Kate's. It still freaked me out that I was having a conversation with someone who was born after 2000.

"Maybe." Kate said in a laugh.

"So Kate why were you so tired in class?" I asked.

"I have no idea. Maybe looking at you just exhausts me." Kate said sarcastically.

"Really? All that excitement you feel making you drowsy?" I retorted knowing that I had bested her comment. She laughed nervously again and had that same blush as earlier. As she looked away from me in embarrassment, Lily mouthed something along the lines of 'What is that all about?'. I shrugged my shoulders.

The three of us finished lunch (I was actually surprised that I ate at all) and Kate and I said good bye to Lily to go to our next classes. The rest of the day went normally. Kate managed to stay awake through seventh period and eighth was Phys Ed so she didn't get an opportunity to sleep. That whole period, I was staring at her. She had changed into a tank top and short-shorts. Her legs looked so amazing. Thankfully, I don't think she noticed. After that, I said goodbye to Kate and received a goodbye hug in return.

On my way out of school, I collected my things from my locker and waited at the main entrance for Charlie. She got there, about ten minutes late, and we left to walk home. She had never been much of the responsible one. On the way she asked me about my day at school, being aware of my depression, and for once I said 'pretty good'. I also made mention of Kate's return to Jasper. After her numerous attempts to connect the two, I held strong and did not reveal that I might 'like' Kate. Finally we reached the house and my day was done.

 **A/N: Kinda long right? I wouldn't expect all of the chapters to be like this. I had a lot of ideas and no real, good place to end it before I did. I did, however, enjoy the level of detail that I was able to go into as compared to my other story, which if you haven't read, I've heard that it's worth a look. Anyway, please tell me what you think of the chapter. I'd really like some feedback.**

 **See you next chapter,**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	2. Alarming Topics

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 2 _Alarming Topics_

 **A/N: As I write this author's note, I have no idea how long this chapter will be. Before I start, I wanted to point out that I do in fact have at least one female reader. I hope she knows who she is, but I'll make her name known. It's wolfies soul. I want to also thank her and the other nine people who reviewed: Branonymous ( I like your story too.), Phantomwriter, Mysterydude23, Xxthe dark shadowXx, AtteroAdepto, , EnderDj101, Valckross, and Kellylad13 (you already know how much I love you). Thanks so much.**

 **In addition, I'd like to show you my favorite reviews, although they were all greatly appreciated. This is something that I think that I'll do for every chapter.**

" **Dude Nick mate this is great. Keep it up. LOVE IT. TRUCKING LOVE IT! MAGNIFICENT!" –AtteroAdepto**

" **I have to say, for a first chapter, this story is really impressive. It has an original idea, and the detail was excellent; I could vividly imagine the setting. Keep up the amazing work P.S I'm glad to say that I inspired an amazing writer like you to write another high school story. I'm proudkeep up the work my student haha" –Kellylad13**

(Humphrey's POV)

Charlie and I made it to our house after walking from school. In the driveway of the house, I saw my Dad's car. I call him Dad, but he isn't really my biological father. Both Charlie and I were adopted by him when I was born. My real father died in a car accident when my mother was pregnant and she died giving birth to me. My foster father, Paul Wilson, whose name Charlie and I gladly took, felt just as real to me as a blood relative. He was a great father to us, we could have done much worse, but even though he loved us, he wasn't able to be home a lot. He worked a lot of nights and sometimes whole days to give Charlie and I almost everything that we asked for, like my car. Anyways, I walked into the house, following Charlie. We were both excited to see him.

Charlie ran into the into the kitchen yelling, "Hi daddy!". She gave him a rather strong hug from what I could see.

"Hi sweetheart . How was your day?" Paul asked, petting the back of Charlie's head.

"Good. Not as good as Humphrey's though." She said as she shot me a glance and a snicker. I walked through the door frame that lead to the kitchen with a faint smile on my face and my eyes squinting at Charlie in a way that said 'Why?'.

"Oh really?" he said laughing, before he addressed me. When he did so, he shifted his attention from Charlie's head, below his, to me in the doorway. "Hey Humphrey. How are you feeling?" he asked. He, like Charlie, was aware of my ongoing struggle with depression and was very concerned. He made the initial push for me to get psychologist.

"It was surprisingly good for once." I said with a laugh.

"Yeah? That's good. What changed?" he asked, knowing that I likely wouldn't be interested in talking for much longer.

"Umm…I don't really know. Well…Kate's back in Jasper." I answered, not entirely sure myself.

"Oooohh. I think I know." He said, jokingly giving me a little bit of a hard time. I didn't really mind.

"Yeah whatever." I said as I smiled and walked upstairs to my room.

I spent the rest of the day just thinking and occasionally listening to music and singing along. I like to sing; it mellows me out. Apparently I'm a pretty good singer too. At least, that's what Paul and Charlie say when I accidently sing loud enough for them to hear. I did know that I had decent range in my voice, and definitely some emotion, but I never really thought of myself as that great.

It was about 8:30 p.m. and I was listening to some Ed Sheeran tracks on YouTube, when my mind started to drift off toward the subject of Kate. There was a lot to think about with Kate. I was still really unsure of my feelings for her. We had always been friends and she always looked cute, but now that she's sixteen, she's undeniably beautiful. Maybe I did have a crush on her. I'd be okay with that, but I wanted to see how this would play out. After all, I had only seen her again for one day.

With that thought in mind, I drifted off to sleep around nine o'clock.

(Time skip: 6:30 A.M. the next morning)

I set my alarm clock for an hour earlier than yesterday. I was in a good mood and thought that I might want breakfast in the morning. As it happens, I still didn't really feel like eating. I woke up, feeling the same way that I did most mornings. It was unexpected but unsurprising. Worst of all, I again awoke to that loud, droning, fire alarm that I call a clock.

I managed to drag myself out of bed and down the hall to take a shower. It, as per my usual routine, was quick but unenergetic. I brushed my teeth and had a quick shave before I went back to my room to get dressed. Today I felt like wearing some gray t-shirt and a pair of black, fitted jeans. Before I left, I put on some more of the after shave that Kate said she liked. After making myself decent, I went downstairs. Standing in the kitchen, presumably making himself breakfast, was Paul. I laid down on the couch in my living room.

"Morning Humphrey." Paul greeted.

"Morning." I grumbled back lethargically. My face was buried into a pillow, so I don't think what I said was that intelligible.

"Not so good today, huh?" He asked, concerned.

"Yeah." I replied, still not being much of a conversationalist. I think he understood that. "Are you going into work early?" I asked, picking my head up off of the pillow so that I could be coherent.

"Yeah. Staying late again too." He said plainly. I was glad for that because he knew that I didn't want a long, complicated answer. I know deep down that he really gets me, even if I couldn't voice my opinions now. I slept the rest of that extra hour on that couch. It wasn't a very restful sleep and I actually woke up feeling more tired.

Paul called out, "Humphrey, coffee.". To my ears, that was a beautiful sound. Not enough to get me to run to my drink though. I shambled into the kitchen to see Paul and Charlie sitting at the counter. Charlie was eating cereal again and Paul was reading a newspaper on his phone. When I walked in, Charlie turned around to face me.

"Humph, you feel okay?" she asked upon looking at me. I should probably look in the mirror and wash my face or something.

"I'm fine." I said. I hated those words as they came out of my mouth. It was my go-to phrase whenever someone asks about me. I didn't want anyone, especially her, to worry about me. I hate to be the cause of someone's worsening mood. On top of this, it was a great, stinking, fat lie. I had a knot in my stomach that felt like I was digesting a boulder, I was unsure if I'd pass out at any minute, and my head felt so light that I thought that at any moment, it could just float away. Charlie didn't buy it. She knew better. She stood up from her chair and placed a hand on my forehead gently and motherly.

"You're a little hot." She said, and I could see the worry on her face. That didn't make me happy.

"You're not so bad yourself." I joked as I cracked a half smile. It wasn't a very convincing one, I have to admit. The concern that she outwardly bore was dissipated for a moment as she laughed but it returned seconds later. I decided to go and grab my coffee before it gets cold and before I get more frustrated with how much my sister cared about me. I downed it quickly.

"Alright. I have to go to work. Do you two want a ride?" Paul broke the silence with.

"No thanks. I'll drive." I said.

"I'm gonna ride with Humphrey, Dad." Charlie chimed in. I could tell from the way that she said it, that she was riding with me to keep an eye on me. She may have even done it, thinking that it would keep me from driving off the road. Admittedly, that wasn't too far outside the realm of possibility on some days.

Charlie and I said our goodbyes. Well she said hers. I more muttered mine. Regardless, Paul got into his Audi a3 and Charlie and I got into my mustang. The ride to school was quiet, which was perfectly acceptable by my standards. Once we got to the school, I drove into the parking lot behind the school. After parking, Charlie got out of the car and I just sat there in it for a minute, thinking. Not really about anything specific, just thinking. I was ripped from my thoughts by Charlie knocking on my window and gesturing for me to come with her.

I turned off the car, stepped out of it, and locked the doors. We walked up to the rear entrance but when I reached to open the door to let Charlie and I through, she grabbed my arm and stopped me.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay?" she asked again, this time with some more conviction.

"I'm fine." I replied misleadingly again. There that sentence was again. She still didn't believe me, but she gave in. She allowed me to open the doors and let her, then myself through.

Before we split up to go to our lockers, she said, "I'll see you at lunch okay?".

"K." I answered. With that agreed upon, we turned toward our respective lockers and separated. I went to my locker and found Kate at the one immediately beside it. She was wearing a nice t-shirt and another pair of skinny jeans. These, however, were ripped a little bit up the leg. She was moving around energetically. She would probably want to talk too. I sighed and walked over to her. Kate was great, I just didn't feel much like talking.

As I walked up next to her and began to open my locker she said, "Hi Humphrey.". She had the biggest smile on her face. I couldn't imagine why she was so happy to see me, but for whatever reason she had, I was just happy that she was. Or maybe I shouldn't be. I have no idea. The female mind boggles me. Anyway, that smile was awe inspiring. It put me into a better mood. Suddenly I got the urge to mess with her a little.

"Hi Kate. Hey, has anyone told you that you're a lot like the flu?" I said with more energy than everything else that I had said so far that day.

"No. Why?" Kate asked, seeming a little hurt. That is exactly what I wanted.

"Because you're smile is infectious." I said. In my mind I held my fist up in victory at how well she had fallen for it. The image faded from my thoughts as I heard Kate giggle. Wow, her laugh was music to my ears. It was utterly symphonic and adorably girly. What I'm trying to say was that she had a very nice laugh. I refocused my attention to her face where I noticed another blush atop her cheeks and, although it seemed impossible, she bore an embarrassed smile that looked even sweeter than the one it had replaced. Noticing all of this, I couldn't help but grin stupidly at her reaction. I was simply enjoying Kate's bubbly personality.

"I like your smile too. It's warm and comforting." She said back, still blushing. I never thought that I would be described that way. Whenever I saw my smile, I thought it looked plastic and empty. That being said, I did feel like I had a different smile around Kate. Maybe she did really have an effect on my day yesterday. Back to what I was doing, I turned off my phone and was going to put it in my locker, but when I got lost in thought, I put it in my back pocket.

"Humphrey, when you're done staring into your locker, we should get to class." Kate said. I laughed at that. Little did she know that I almost every time I'm thinking, she manages to occupy my thoughts. Hmm…occupy my thoughts…good words. That may come in handy later.

"Yeah let's go." I said before I got caught up thinking about more stuff.

As we walked through the hallway, I noticed that Kate was standing up on her own, unlike most of yesterday. I decided to tease her a little more.

"Oh Kate, you sure you can walk by yourself today?"

She smiled and retorted "Yeah but you could carry me if you really liked it that much.". She seemed surprised when I smiled and actually held out my arms in front of me, squatting close to the ground. She blushed some more and looked away. I would give anything to know what was going on inside her head, because on the outside, I was really confused. I didn't understand why she would be blushing so much because I actually offered to carry her. I'm probably way over thinking this. We walked into Calculus and sat in our seats quietly.

Our Calculus teacher, Ms. Brown, basically told us that through the year we are going to learn the lessons on our own, that there will be a test on a lesson each week, and that the day before the test, we can ask questions. To say the least, I was not a fan of this teaching style, if you could call it that. It sounded a lot like, 'I'm lazy and don't feel like teaching a class so I'll only do it once a week and let you guys handle it the rest of the time.'. She said that in class every day, we can work on the lessons or do whatever. After explaining this, which you would have expected to be said in her orientation yesterday (I guess she wanted to see the look of horror on our faces), she went back to her desk and did something on her computer.

I was starting to get really annoyed. I had a bad start to the day, I came to school and Kate did make me feel much better, but now any shred of happiness that I had was mercilessly confiscated by this self-absorbed, lazy terrorist of a teacher. Barely knowing her, I thought about how much I hated this un-caring maggot of a person.

Ten minutes had gone by since that 'announcement', although I was serious about it being called an act of terror, and I was growing angrier with each passing second. 'You have to relax. You're just on edge again.' I thought to myself but it wasn't working very well. My muscles were tensing to the point where I thought my fingers were going to break inside my balled-up fist. I inhaled deeply and tried to let out a slow breath but it came out hurried and shallow. I repeated it over and over again to no avail. I was actually shaking in my desk and my knee was bobbing up and down at a rate of a mile a minute.

I was sweating and staring at a wall in anger when I felt something touch my wrist, which was firmly planted on the top of the desk. I looked down from the wall to inspect the object. It was a soft and clearly feminine hand that was attached to a slender arm, which came from my left. I looked to the owner of the limb to see Kate looking back at me. She looked very worried. I assume my breathing had gained her attention.

"Humphrey, are you alright? You look upset." She asked calmly.

I stuttered back, "Umm…I-I, umm…yeah, I-I'm fine.". I was too angry to notice myself saying that damned sentence again. Had I, I would have been even angrier. I wanted to tell her about how I'd been depressed lately and it gives me these panic attacks, but she would only worry about me, and I already had two too many people doing that. Noticing how distressed I looked, Kate slid her hand up my arm, and actually up the sleeve of my t-shirt, to my shoulder, which she rubbed reassuringly.

"Humphrey, everything's alright. Breathe slowly. You're okay." She said as she continued to rub my shoulder. I tried again to do what she instructed me, and it worked a little bit better, but it didn't help that much.

"K-Kate, can I, umm, a-ask you a weird favor?" I asked, shakily looking at her through squinted eyes.

"Sure." She replied softly.

"Can I hold your hand?" I asked, looking away in embarrassment. Without asking questions or wasting the time to answer, she quickly took her hand from my shoulder, and placed it in mine, squeezing it. I squeezed back a bit harder than she did, although I was careful not to hurt her, and took in another deep breath. This time, it came out at a more acceptable pace. I looked at my hand which, in comparison, dwarfed hers (although I am admittedly a guy and a rather big guy so hers isn't really that small), and thought, 'Oh no. She's going to want me to tell her.'. I loosened my grip on her and tried to pull away, but she only grabbed my hand harder and held it in place. I looked up at her nervously.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" she asked. I could tell from her sweet, understanding voice that she really did care about what was going on with me. I still wanted to open up to her about it, but she's already concerned and it would only serve to make her more so. I'd hate myself for that. I don't see it as my place to put my problems on my friends.

"Umm…no." I said gingerly.

"Alright, maybe when you're ready. In the meantime, don't ever lie to me again." She said in reference to me assuring her that I was okay.

"Sorry." I said weakly. I didn't want to challenge her on that because I knew she only cared a lot. She is such a kind person. She is the type of girl that you just want to make happy, if it's the only thing that you do. Her happy-go-lucky personality reminded me a lot of how I used to be before high school hit me like a bag of bricks, and who she made me feel like again. Thinking this I looked up at her again and she smiled back to me. I took another deep breath and let it out calmly before I smiled back.

"Thank you." I said sincerely.

"Anytime. Hey, do you get this work?" she asked, seeming as if she rather intentionally changed the subject. She pulled her hand away from mine to point to the open textbook on her desk. I instantly regretted not holding on to it tighter. I hoped that she would put it back, and as if she could read my mind, she did. I said a silent 'thank you' to whoever was listening in my head, before I leaned over to see the lesson in her book, as I had not even opened mine yet. I glanced over the material and it didn't appear to be that difficult.

"Yeah. I kinda get it."

"Well I don't." she said as she smiled, clearly thinking about something mischievous. "I tell you what, you can come over my house after school and we can work on it together. Is that okay with you?"

"Okay. I just have to tell Charlie." I said, smiling excitedly.

Kate noticed my heightening mood and joked, "Ah, big sis has you on a short leash, huh?". I decide to go along with it.

"Oh yeah. Eleven months older and she thinks she can boss me around like my mother." I joked. Kate laughed at first, but shortly after she frowned. I guess she was thinking about how I mentioned my mother. That tended to be a bit of a conversation killer. I decided to get her mind off of it.

"So how's your mom? She was always so nice." I said as I remember how her mother always treated me. Every time that I went Kate's house, she used to always be the first to greet me and give me a hug.

"She's good." Kate said and thankfully her smile returned. It felt very unnatural for her to be without it.

"Good I said." I said plainly. Once again, I didn't feel like talking much anymore, so I decided to close my eyes. Kate's hand was still clutching mine on the desk, so I moved my right hand (the one she was holding) and tucked it into my chest as I rested my head on my other arm, further up the desk. Kate wasn't outwardly opposed to the motion.

Several minutes went by and it neared the end of class. A minute before the bell rang, I heard a buzzing hell screech bounce around the room. It sounded a lot like my alarm clock. I shot up from my rest and felt my heart race. My hand tensed up again around Kate's. I searched for the source of the ear-shattering noise and found it to be coming from Ms. Brown's hand, which held her phone. It was her text ringtone. I hated everything about this woman.

Kate felt my hand clamp down onto hers and asked, "Humphrey what's wrong?". She seemed a little scared.

"Huh? Oh nothing. It's just that that's the same sound as my alarm clock. I really hate it." I said, as I relaxed myself.

"Oh. Alright." Kate said. I smiled because I knew she cared about me to some degree, even though I didn't like that I was causing her to worry. At that moment the bell rang. I got up and put on my backpack. In the same fashion as yesterday, I picked hers up too, and again slung it over my right shoulder. I enjoyed helping her and it was sort of a way of extending my gratitude further.

(Kate's POV)

"You don't have to do that." I said to Humphrey as he adorned my backpack.

"I know I don't. I want to." He said as he walked toward the classroom door. In his seat I noticed his phone. It must have slipped out of his pocket when his leg was shaking. I don't know what's up with him but it's really troubling. I've never seen him so anxious and kind of distant. I remembered what he said about his alarm. Maybe I could help with that a little. I grabbed his phone and carefully put it in my pocket. I smiled giddily with the thought of the surprise that I was going to give him.

Behind me I heard Humphrey say, "Kate, you coming?" as he stood in the doorway of the classroom, looking toward me. Luckily, I don't think he saw me take his phone. I got rid of my smile because he'd know that something was up.

"Yeah." I said as I started towards him. We walked out of class together. While we walked, I wrapped my arms around his left arm. It seemed to calm him down in Calculus and I wanted him to stay that way. I thought that I should probably do it for the rest of the day just in case. Okay, I also liked feeling his muscles. He got really handsome and fit in those three years that I was gone. The walk to second period was nice.

 **A/N: The only that I really wanted to add was :) . Have a nice day.**

 **-Nick**


	3. Transparent Feelings

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 3 _Transparent Feelings_

 **A/N: Hey guys. I got a kinda long chapter for you today so I hope that you enjoy. It was a lot of fun to write. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and p.m.'ed me about the last chapter. You have all been great and you all treat me like your friend so that's really nice. I enjoy feeling like I make you guys happy. That being said, her is my favorite comment (again they were all deeply appreciated).**

" **i was thinking that kate would mess with humphrey with his alarm or something and humphrey (since kate was gone for so long) still doesn't realises that kate is there and attacks or pushed her and grabs his phone and then he realises his mistake and runs off somewhere (Not home) (End of your question)**

 **and maybe doesn't get seen for a bit with no answer on his phone as it is turned off or broken. Police get called and all that stuff and they eventually find him maybe about 1 and a half to 2 weeks later living in a den (see what im doing there) eating cooked meat that cooked using a fire he made and does not speak or comply with the police. they later find wounds that have partially haled from maybe animal attacks and also find him quite a bit muscular and stronger. he then does not talk or interacts with the rest of society as he still feels like he is ashamed? of what he did to kate." –Dark_Grey_Wolf**

 **That had me almost in tears, I was laughing so hard. So, on to the story…**

(Humphrey's POV)

(Sixth Period, Lunch)

Kate and I just sat down at our lunch table, where Charlie was waiting.

"Hi Charlie." Kate and I both said before exchanging smiles with each other. Once I got myself situated in my seat and had my meal tray placed neatly in front of me, I looked up at Charlie to see her oddly staring back at me.

"What?" I asked her, thinking that the only reason that she would be looking at me like that was if I had something like 'dumbass' written on my forehead.

"You're smiling Humph." She answered, with a laugh.

"Would you prefer that I not?" I asked sarcastically. I didn't really understand what she meant by that. Kate was just laughing at our banter.

"It's just nice to see you do it once in a while is all." Charlie said, still giving me that mind boggling glare. What the hell was she thinking? Kate decided to interject something.

"Hey, isn't 'Humph' my nickname for you." She asked me.

"Yeah. I guess I picked it up after a while." Charlie responded, even though the question was directed toward me. Kate only seemed amused by the fact that both she and my sister were using the same pet name for me. I just returned to eating my food.

Charlie joked, "Kate, how'd you get him to eat. I never get him to do that."

"Oh that's easy. I drugged him." Kate said causing both her and Charlie to start laughing. I wanted to be a little annoyed at how they were talking about me like I was an old horse, but it was hard to be anything but positive when Kate was laughing. She just has this way of making me feel like none of the millions of things that are happening at that moment have any significance whatsoever. When Kate looked down at her tray to start on her food, Charlie mouthed 'You should tell her.'. I can only assume that she meant my psychological problems. I shook my head 'no' and mouthed back 'Don't you dare.'. Charlie kept giving me a look of exasperation, but I knew that she wouldn't tell Kate. She better not.

In an effort to get both of us away from that subject, I asked Kate, "So where's Lily."

"That's a good question." She said as she scanned the cafeteria. "Oh. I see her coming over now."

"Hi Lily." Kate said as she approached.

"Hi." Said back, seeming a little out of breath.

"Hi Lily." I said when she began to sit down across from Kate and I and on the same side as Charlie.

"Hi." She said again, in the same exhausted tone.

"Lily, you remember my sister, Charlie, right?" I said pointing over to my sibling.

"Hi." Lily said for the third time. Kate and I looked at each other, sharing the same look of questioning.

"Everything alright?" I asked.

"Yeah. Sorry. I just got held up by my biology teacher is all." She replied, inhaling so that she could finally catch her breath.

"What for?" Kate asked.

"Ooh, let me guess; for being hi?" I said, laughing hysterically as all three girls looked at me, saying with their eyes, 'You're stupid.'. I didn't care. My simple brand of comedy is good enough for me.

After a moment of their condemnation, Lily said, "No. I got in a little trouble cuz I fell asleep in class."

"What is with you two and being so tired?" I asked. They both answered my question by shrugging their shoulders.

"Ever think of coffee?" Charlie added.

"No. That's actually a really good idea." Kate said as she looked like she couldn't believe that it hadn't occurred to her.

"Humphrey can't get through the day without it." Charlie said. Was she going to tell them my whole life's story? I don't know why she is fixating on Kate and Lily knowing everything about me.

"Are you planning on telling them the color of my boxers too?" I said sarcastically. To Kate and Lily, it seemed like more of a joke than it was. Charlie smiled at me devilishly. I didn't know what she was planning, but I was sure that it wasn't going to be good.

"Blue." She informed them. I put my face in my hands in embarrassment. Admittedly, that wasn't the biggest of deals, but something about these two young girls knowing the details of my underwear was discomforting. The three of them laughed at me for a moment, so I decided to play it off like I didn't care and go back to my lunch, but I think my blazing red blushing might have given me away. The ensuing awkward silence, well at least awkward for me, was broken when Lily spoke up.

"If it makes you feel any better, Kate's underwear is white and pink and mine is green." She said smiling mischievously at her sister. Kate lightly hit Lily on the arm in mock anger. Charlie and I laughed but she stopped when Kate, Lily, and I just stared at her.

"You don't really expect me too, do you?" She said, but our unmoving gaze broke her down.

"Ugh, fine. Purple…I think. Happy now?" She said, sufficiently embarrassed for my purposes. We all kinda laughed together for a moment. Soon after, I remembered that I needed to tell Charlie something.

"Charlie, before I forget, Kate invited me to her house today so we can do homework." I told her.

"Yeah…'homework'…sure." She responded seeming very satisfied with herself as she continued her attempt to humiliate me in front of Kate.

"Bite me." I said back. She snapped her jaws at the air. God I hated to love her.

"So does that mean you're walking home with us?" Lily asked in my direction.

"I can drive us if you want." I told her.

"K" she said. My answer seemed to satiate her interest. She looked back down to hurriedly eat her food. We only had a few more minutes left of lunch, so I did the same.

"Sounds good." Kate added before she finished up her food too. I noticed that Charlie did not have any food in front of her. 'Such a hypocrite' I thought.

(time skip: seventh period)

Kate and I sat next to each other in our seventh period history class, as we did in almost all of our others. Our history teacher, Mr. Jackson, was beginning a lesson on the preface to World War 2.

He asked the class, "So, who can tell me what Hitler did in March of 1936 that violated one of the clauses of the Treaty of Versailles?". No one in the room raised their hand. I wasn't sure if it was because they were all still adjusting from their summer vacation to schoolwork or if they just really didn't know. I, however, did. I had always been interested in history, especially that of the era of WW2. To me, history class always felt like a really interesting story time and this time period just caught my interest.

I raised my hand and when called on, said "He invaded the Rhineland, sir.". Everybody in the class looked at me with expressions of confusion as to how I knew the answer, mixed with some looks of disgust. Those didn't faze me. I never minded when people disliked how smart I was. I always took it as a compliment, like hate messages in a competitive video game.

Mr. Jackson affirmed, "Yes, that's right Mr.…Humphrey Wilson." as he searched through the seating chart at his desk to find my name. He turned around to the chalkboard behind him and scribbled notes as he continued, "Hitler occupied the Rhineland which was designated a demilitarized zone in the Treaty of Versailles after World War 1.". 'Hmmm…' I thought. 'There's that word again, occupy.'. I leaned over to Kate to say something.

Before I could say what I wanted to, Kate whispered "Hey, how did you know that?"

In the same low register, I said back "Huh? Oh the Hitler thing? I just know some stuff about World War 2. Never mind that. Has anyone ever told you that you're a lot like Germany in the Rhineland in 1936?" Kate smiled and laughed as she recognized the same joke structure as the one that I had said to her this morning.

"How?" she asked, playing along with me.

"Because you're always _occupying_ my thoughts." I said smiling and chuckling back at her.

She laughed too and replied, "That's a good one. I'd _reich_ to hear more.". That made me hysterical **(more like** _ **historical**_ **, right? Sorry, that was** _ **pun**_ **too many. I have a serious problem)**. It was very hard to contain my deep amusement. Kate really knows how to brighten up my day. And she knows some history; what could be better?

The rest of the class went at a snail's pace. It wasn't entirely Mr. Jackson's fault. He had to go really slowly so that the rest of the class could keep up, I knew most of what he was saying anyway, and I was really looking forward to going to Kate's house. Eighth period went just as slowly, as I was still very excited. After that period and with it school ended, Kate and I walked to our lockers together. The whole time, she was holding on to me. It wasn't quite like yesterday because she wasn't falling asleep. She's been doing this all day. I better not think on it too much, otherwise I'll go insane. I certainly wasn't going to complain about it either.

After we procured our belongings from our lockers, Kate led me to Lily at her locker. Once we collected her, the three of us exited the school through the rear entrance and walked through the parking lot.

"So which one is yours?" Lily asked. Rather than answer, I pulled out my remote keys and unlocked the doors to my mustang. The headlights flashed, signaling Lily.

"No…" She said as her jaw seemingly dropped to the pavement and she stopped in her tracks.

"What it's just my Shelby." I asked, teasing her a little more. I never would have thought that she was that into cars.

"Which model is it?" she asked. She looked like she was dying for the answer although I think she knew already.

"Gt350." I said smiling. I knew it was nice but it never really seemed to draw this much attention.

"She's going to kill you for that car; you know that right?" Kate chimed in. Lily nodded in agreement, still with an awestricken face.

"So are we going to get in or what?" I asked. Kate and I returned to walking, while Lily ran.

"Shotgun." Kate called out from beside me.

Lily looked back and said, "I hate you."

"It sucks to suck." Kate said back. They're really competitive around each other. I wonder if Charlie and I look that way when we talk. Anyway, Lily climbed into the back seat of the car (it's a two door car btw) while Kate made it into the passenger seat. I took their backpacks and mine and put them into the trunk. I hurriedly walked to the driver-side door and got in too.

"Sorry it's so cramped." I apologized to Lily.

"It's cool. I'm small enough." She said as she managed to seatbelt herself in. Kate and I did the same as I turned over the ignition and the engine thunderously growled to a start. I heard something like 'Woah.' come from the seat behind me. I smiled and drove out of the parking lot. Even though I really wanted to, I resisted the urge to show the girls what the car could really do and I just drove safely. It would be fun, but I'd never forgive myself if something happened.

"So Kate are you going to get your driver's license soon?" I asked, realizing that Kate must've been able to get hers too.

"I got it but I don't think I'll get a car. I don't really like driving that much." She answered.

"What is up with that? Charlie says the same thing." I asked. She shrugged her shoulders in response. "I know you'll want to, right Lily?" I said, peering through the rear view mirror to see her. She nodded her answer. Man it's hard to get a conversation out of these two. "So are your parents home?" I asked to either of them.

"No. Dad had to go to his office in New York and Mom went with him. They won't be back for a little while." Kate said.

"They'll be okay with me coming over right?"

"Yeah, don't worry." She replied. I hope that's true. Winston would probably kill me if he wasn't. I continued on the road to Kate's house when I remembered that Kate left and moved back.

"Kate, you still live in the same house right?" I asked realizing that her family could have moved back into a different one.

"Oh. No actually. I forgot. We live at 32 Centennial Avenue now."

"Did you say Centennial Ave.?" I asked, wanting to make sure I heard her correctly because it seemed as if I must have not.

"Yeah. Why?"

"That's like five blocks away from where I live." I said. So we would be living on the same street. That's cool.

"Neat." She said happily. She stared forward, out of the car, clearly thinking about something. I tried to ignore it because there was no possible way for me to decipher what she was thinking about. The rest of the ride was without talking. I had given up trying to make conversation and just enjoyed the quiet.

When we got to their house, I pulled into their driveway. On the outside, their home seemed a little bit bigger than mine, but not much. The three of us exited the car. I opened the trunk. Lily grabbed her backpack and I grabbed Kate's and mine. Kate closed the lid of the trunk for me.

"Lead the way." I said.

We walked up to the door, where Kate pulled out a key from her pocket and opened it. Lily quickly walked into the house and up the stairs immediately to the right. Kate waited for me on the inside, just beside the door. I walked in and took in my surroundings. The house looked neat and spacious. All of the furniture was meticulously placed and order. Directly across from the front door, I could see into the kitchen. To my left was what appeared to be a family room or a TV room which had a large sectional sofa facing away from me and an also large flat screen TV, staring back at the sofa. On the wall to the left of where I was standing was a doorway which lead into what looked like a dining room.

"So where are we going?" I asked.

"Umm…here's fine." She said as she pointed to the sofa. She walked into the kitchen and asked "Do you want anything to drink?".

"Hard liquor." I joked. I heard a giggle emanate from inside the kitchen. It retained its musical quality. "Water's fine." I actually answered. Moments later, Kate came out with two bottles of water and sat beside me. She wasn't that close and that was alright by me, because I didn't want to push any boundaries by being right on top of her. She set the water bottles down on the coffee table that was in front of us.

"Thanks." I said.

"You're welcome." she said sweetly. She had a very comforting and homely attribute to her voice. It always made me relax. That relaxation was dissipated; because when we pulled our Calculus textbooks from our backpacks and set them on the table, she scooted herself towards me so that our legs were touching. 'So much for keeping my distance.' I thought. This in itself wouldn't make me that nervous, but we were in her house and her parents were out of state. I just wanted to keep a handle on things so that when her parents did come home, I wouldn't be brutally murdered.

(Time skip: one hour later)

We had just finished our homework. It was the very essence of tedium. I reached into my pocket to pull out my phone so that I could check the time, but in it I found nothing. I frantically patted my other three pockets to feel for its presence but I found nothing.

"Oh no." I said aloud.

Kate looked at me and asked "What's wrong?"

"I think I lost my phone."

"Oh. I completely forgot. You left it in Calculus and I picked it up for you." She said as she reached into her backpack and came out with my phone in hand. I let out a deep, relieved sigh, but then something struck my curiosity.

"You went the whole day without remembering that you had my phone." I asked suspiciously. She just smiled and shrugged her shoulders, raising more suspicion. I decided to drop it because I knew that I forgot to put it into my locker and didn't realize that I didn't have it the whole day, so maybe she could forget something like that. "Well thanks." I said gratefully when she handed it to me. She looked thankful that I wasn't mad at her for basically stealing my phone for most of the day. "So what do you want to do now." I asked.

"I don't know but I'm really hot." She said. It was close to midday and it was still summer so that was understandable. The way she said it spawned an idea in my head. I smiled at her and started poking her in the arm with my finger.

After a few pokes, she smiled back, despite being clearly annoyed, and said "Humphrey, what the hell are you doing?". That is exactly the response that I was hoping for. My smile widened with excitement.

"Getting you all hot and bothered." I said bursting into laughter. She laughed too and that same adorable blush that I have been seeing lately reappeared.

"Good one. So anyway, it's hot and we have a pool. Do you want to go swimming?" she asked me. That was a really good idea and it sounded like a lot of fun, but there was a small issue. I didn't have a swim suit and I haven't been swimming in years, so I don't have any at my house either.

"I'd love to but I don't have a swimming suit." I said, disappointed that we would not be swimming.

"That's alright. You can go in your boxers." She replied quickly, almost as if she had the answer already. She must be really smart to be able to problem solve that quickly. Regardless of how fast she gave the answer, it certainly made me nervous. She, probably the hottest girl in school and my long-time friend, just told me to hang out with her in my underwear. It was safe to say that I was without words. Now it was my turn to blush and I did it intensely. Kate could see how nervous I was.

"What? It's not like it makes any difference." She said, attempting to calm my nerves. It didn't really help. I was still too embarrassed to make speech. "Would it help if I did it too? I don't mind. It's no different than a bikini anyway." She added, still trying to make me feel more comfortable. This was still something I had to think about. She, still the hottest girl in school and my long-time friend, was now offering to hang out with me while we were both in our underwear. It was really hot so swimming was actually a really good idea, and it's not like we'd be any less covered in our underwear than we would be in actual swim suits. Yeah, that's what I'll tell myself is why I'm okay with this.

"Umm…okay." I said, trying not to sound too excited. Kate smiled and led me through the patio doors in the kitchen and out to her in-ground pool. It was decently sized. It was nine feet (2.7 meters) deep with a diving board on one side and built in stairs coming out of it on the other. We stopped near those. I looked back at Kate. I was really wary about undressing in front of her and she could tell.

"Don't be so nervous. We're friends." She said as took her top off. I realized that I couldn't just stare at her. I did eventually have to move so I shifted my eyes to the ground below her and took my shirt off. I was really nervous about the next part. That went away as I saw Kate kick her jeans off of her feet. I pulled mine off to, leaning down in the process. When I picked my head back up, my eyes passed over Kate's half-naked body. Wow. She was amazing. Her body was just so slimmed and toned and curved perfectly. I also noticed that Lily wasn't lying when she pointed out her underwear's colors. Her bottoms were a bleached white, with pink lacing around the edges and she had a matching bra.

She interrupted my momentary and unintentional inspection, saying "You're not just going to stare at me the whole time, are you?". I quickly looked back at the ground again and blushed some more.

"Sorry." I said; mad at myself for doing something so uncourteous, even if it wasn't on purpose. She giggled at my embarrassed reaction.

"It's ok Humph. I'm only kidding." She said as she sat down on the side of the pool with her legs in the water. I chuckled a little too and stepped in, by means of the stairs.

I spent the next few minutes swimming around, floating on my back, and hanging out across the pool from Kate with my arms up and out of it, resting on the ledge. The water was pleasantly cool and we just caught up on each other's recent events. I found out that she and her family had only gotten back to New Jersey a couple of months ago. I still wanted to tell her what's been going on with me and my depression but I once again decided against it. Above all else, we were having a good time and I didn't want to bring the mood down.

Eventually, our conversation was interrupted when Kate decided that she should splash a bunch of water at my face with her legs. I stared back in playful shock as she said "You still looked kinda warm.". This called for retaliation. I dove underneath the surface and quickly swam over to her as she scrambled to get up and run away, only to have her legs slip out from under her on the wet concrete as she tried to lift herself from the poolside. When I got really close to her, I rolled my body upwards under the water, and as I did so, kicked up a large splash with both of my legs. She sat there in disbelief. Because I was still so close to her, she made the mistake of kicking another splash at me.

"That's it." I jokingly said as I pulled myself from the pool beside where she was sitting. As I was climbing out, she thought it time that she tried to run away again, and she succeeded this time after stumbling a little once more. Her faltering, however, gave me enough time to catch up behind her as she tried to make it back into the safety of the house. When I reached her, I picked her up under her legs and back (areas that I certainly didn't mind touching, although I wasn't thinking that at this moment) and carried her over to the pool.

The whole time, she was playfully screaming, "No, no, no!" and laughing heartily. When I reached the pool, I threw her into the water. She resurfaced, smiling. We shared a long laugh while she walked up the stairs that lead out of the pool.

"Okay. You win." She said. I laughed again for a moment, but it was cut short when I noticed something. I froze with my eyes opened widely as I saw that her underwear, due to it getting wet, was partially see-through. I guess that's the difference between panties and a bikini. I knew I had to tell her, but how do you bring something like that up. 'Lost for words' didn't begin to describe how I felt.

My stillness was broken when I saw Kate blush a bright red and say, "Umm Humphrey…you're uhh…peeking out of your underwear.".

Horrified, I looked down to see 'myself' through the fly in my underwear. 'Dear God, I hate you.'-signed Humphrey Wilson. I quickly covered my crotch, grabbed my clothes, and quickly ran inside, thoroughly embarrassed. Inside the house, I ran into the kitchen, looking for a bathroom, with my shirt and jeans at waist level.

Ahead of me, I heard Lily say, "What's going o…" before she stopped. I looked up to the stairs by the door to see Lily, staring back at me at the bottom. 'Damn it' I thought as I scurried to my left where I saw an open door through which I saw a bathroom. I ran inside, shut the door, and locked it. This is going to be really awkward…

 **A/N: Oooh, cliffhanger. I bet you guys love those, right? So this is going to be super weird for Humphrey, Kate, and now Lily. Can their friendship survive this? Probably but we'll have to see won't we. Sorry for all the puns. I just lost control of myself. Please review to tell me what you thought of everything and I'll see you all next chapter. Have a nice day :)**

 **I changed the second to last paragraph to edit out what Humphrey said. I didn't like how it happened so I'll rewrite it and place it in the next chapter.**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	4. Mustang Meddling

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 4 _Mustang Meddling_

 **A/N: Hey guys, I have another chapter for you. FYI, I changed the original post of chapter 3 slightly. I just basically edited out what Humphrey said to Kate before the end of the chapter. I didn't like how it fit in so I just re-wrote it for this chapter, where it came out much more naturally.**

" **Well that was interesting" –Xxthe dark shadowXx**

 **I thought that best summed it up. :)**

(Humphrey's POV)

'Damn it' I thought as I scurried to my left where I saw an open door, through which I saw a bathroom. I ran inside, shut the door, and locked it. This is going to be really awkward…

I dropped my clothes on the ground, leaned against the wall, and put my hands on my head. How the hell am I going to think my way out of this one? So much just went so wrong so fast. Okay, first things first, I need to get dressed. I put my shirt and pants on my still pretty wet body. My underwear was also still wet but this was better than going commando in my opinion. So now that that's figured out, what am I going to do next? I took a deep breath and tried to come up with a plan. While I was doing this, I think I heard both Lily and Kate go upstairs.

(Kate's POV)

Jeez, Humphrey was really embarrassed. I don't blame him though; it was awkward for both of us. At least he doesn't have to worry about being small. I mean wow. It looked hard to walk around with. I shook my head in an attempt to get the image out of my head. I walked into the house after picking up my clothes. Standing inside, at the bottom of the stairs, was Lily, who looked like a deer in head lights.

She asked, "Kate, why are you and Humphrey both in your underw…you didn't!?"

"No!" I exclaimed defensively. "We were just swimming." I said as I walked towards her and up the stairs.

"Well why was he running?" she asked, following me to my room.

"I'll tell you in a second." I said as I walked into my room and closed the door in front of Lily. A minute later, I had changed out of my soaking wet underwear into some others and put on a tank-top and jean shorts. I opened the door to let Lily in. I sat on my bed, crossed my legs, and looked back at Lily. After closing the door quietly behind her, she did the same.

"So…" I started as I began to tell her all of the events up to and including when I saw 'it'. When I finished, leaving off when Humphrey ran into the house, with his clothes in hand, Lily developed a small smile and a blush as she was just staring at the bed.

"What?" I asked.

She giggled and said, "He…umm…wasn't doing the best job of covering himself when he came inside…". We laughed together for a little while. Eventually, I realized that Humphrey was still downstairs and that we should probably talk about this.

"I'm going downstairs now. You understand that if you tell anyone about this, he'll strangle you, right?" I said to her as I started to leave my room.

She laughed and said, "No, I don't think he will. He's too nice and soft."

"Well if he doesn't I will. I mean it; not a soul. Especially Mom or Dad." I said seriously. She rolled her eyes, but made a 'cross my heart' gesture with her finger. "Good." I said, finally leaving the room. Now that that was done, what was I going to say to Humphrey?

(Humphrey's POV)

Kate was upstairs so I had a little time to think before she came down. I opened the bathroom door and peered around the kitchen. There was no sign that anyone was down here. I went to the doorway of the kitchen that separated the sort of foyer that led from the front door to the kitchen, stairs, and living room. There was still no sign of either of the girls. I decided that I would wait on the sofa in the living room. When I sat down, I put my elbows on my knees and my hands to my head. What could I possibly say to bring this situation back to normal? Should I just leave? No I don't think so, but what am I going to do? Oh God, what if she doesn't want to be friends anymore after this? What if she thinks that I didn't tell her that her underwear was transparent on purpose? What if she thinks I'm a pervert?

I was starting to get really nervous. My palms became sweaty, I had goosebumps, but felt like I was on fire, and I started to shake again. My leg was bouncing off the ground and every time I tried to stop it, the speed only increased. I tried to take a deep breath, but when I attempted to wait for a second before exhaling; my lungs refused to hold any of the air. My breathing heightened to the point of hyperventilation and my heart was pounding. I could feel it beat in every inch of my body. It felt like I was having a heart attack but I wasn't having any chest pains. This was my second panic attack of the day.

Suddenly, I heard footsteps come down the stairs behind me. I wanted to turn around to see who had come down, but my body wouldn't let me. It stayed firmly planted, trembling in place, and kept my head resting in my hands.

"Humphrey?" Kate said, hearing my wheezing. As soon as she confirmed the source, she ran to my side. "Humphrey! Humph, you gotta calm down." She said as she sat on the couch next to me and placed her hand on my back. She was getting increasingly worried and frightened. She finally remembered what to do. She grabbed my right hand, ripped it away from my head, and held it in hers. It was actually very comforting and reassuring, for whatever reason. I have no idea why this worked so well, but it did so that's what matters. I tried to control myself and it started to happen.

It took about a minute of gradually slowing breaths for me to relax. I took on last deep breath and let it out slowly. I looked up at Kate to see her beautiful, caring eyes looking back. In the corners of her eyes, I noticed tears beginning to form. 'You idiot!' I thought to myself, 'Look at what you did. So much for not worrying her.'. I didn't know what to say. We were so far past the point where I could play it off as nothing.

"Kate…I-I…" I began, but I was cut off when Kate gave me a big, strong hug. I felt the tears on my shoulder as I heard her sharp sobs in my ear. I had to hug her back. Her sadness brought me to the brink of tears as well. We just sat there for a few minutes until she gained her composure enough to talk.

"Humphrey, please. Tell me what's wrong with you. You're making me really scared." She said as she broke away from me. I was so frustrated with myself. I wanted her to know everything about me, have no closed doors between, and she deserved an answer after all of this, but I just couldn't put that on her. She would be even more scared, and more worried, and she'd never look at me the same. I know she'd be understanding, but it would change everything. I couldn't tell her; at least, not now.

"Kate…I-I can't." I shakily said. Her asking me this was killing me on the inside.

"Why? Don't you trust me?" she asked. That broke my heart. I was sure that my ribcage was slowly imploding. I felt like she just questioned all of our history together, our whole friendship, and everything that I had come to feel for her. What do you say to that; 'Sure but never when things are serious.'?

"I-I do, but…Kate, this is different. I just can't tell you." I said. I hated that I had to keep such a huge secret and part of my life from her, but I couldn't bring myself to do the alternative.

"Soon, at least? Please." She begged. As much as I knew I should have said no, I didn't. I nodded my answer. I wasn't sure if it was a lie. Maybe I would tell her sometime, but right now I needed to get off the subject. I looked up at Kate once more and saw the trails of her tears on her gentle face. I hated seeing her like this.

I reached up a hand to her cheek and started to wipe away her tears, saying, "Please don't cry for me. I don't like it when you're worried and you're so beautiful when you're happy.". It got a laugh and a smile out of her before she hugged me once more. I held her closely too.

"Thank you." She whispered in my ear. In response I squeezed a little harder and smiled widely. The smile went away and was replaced with a nervous blush when I remembered that I still had to tell her something. It was going to eat away at my conscience until I did.

"Kate…there's something else that I do have to tell you." I said as I pulled myself away from her.

"What is it?"

"It's about when we were at the pool." I said, avoiding eye contact in shame. She also adorned an embarrassed look and grew a slight smile.

"We don't have to talk about it." She said.

"Well…umm…before you, uh, made me aware of what was going on, I uh…well…I'll just say it. Your underwear was a little less than opaque. I think it's because it was wet or something. I was gonna tell you but I had no idea how to say that. I just kinda froze." I said, thoroughly mortified and awaiting a violent response. When I didn't hear or feel anything after a moment, I looked up at Kate. Her face was cherry red.

"Uhh…" she said.

"That was my response too."

"Umm…how much did you see?" she asked, also humiliated. Man, was that an awkward question. It caught me well off guard.

"A lot." I said honestly. I really hoped that she wasn't looking for details.

"Oh…okay. So I guess we've both basically seen each other naked. Where do we go from here?"

"Hopefully, to never talk about it again."

"Alright." She said, completely understanding that wish.

"Oh, before we drop this forever, did Lily…um…see 'me'?" I asked. Kate giggled a little. That is not the response I was hoping for.

"I think so. She said that you hadn't really covered yourself well. Don't worry I made sure she won't tell anybody." She said smiling.

"Great. Just my luck." I said sarcastically. There was a minute of awkward silence before I asked, "So what do you want to do now."

"Umm…we can play some video games." She said. I stared back at her inquiringly.

"Since when do you play video games? You used to always tell me what a stupid waste of time they were." I said.

"Well, when we were in New York, we lived right next to a GameStop, and I don't know. I guess I just picked it up after a while. We have a ps4 if you want to play." She said, giggling at my reaction. I still wasn't sure if she was messing with me or not. She used to make fun of me all the time for playing video games so much.

"Okay." I said.

She got up and walked over to the flat screen TV on the wall, in front of the sofa. She opened the cabinet below it to reveal, as she said, a ps4. She turned the TV and the console on. While she was waiting for them to power up, I was thinking, 'So now she's a gamer girl too. That's it, I'm in love.' almost not meaning it. It also didn't hurt that she was bending over to use the electronics. It seemed a little bit like it had to be on purpose, but I couldn't come up with a reason as to why she would do that, so I just shrugged it off. With the TV displaying the ps4 home screen, Kate grabbed two controllers and walked back over to the couch.

"What do you want to play?" she asked.

I scrolled through her catalog of downloaded games, consisting of numerous first-person shooters, action games, role-playing games and others. Eventually, I found a game that I really love, The Last of Us: Remastered.

"What about the Last of Us?" I asked.

"But it's single player."

"We can take turns, if that's ok with you."

"Okay. I haven't finished it yet." She said as she started up the game.

"Really? How far are you?"

"Barely started. I just started before we moved and I haven't really had time. Hey, we should play through it together."

"Alright. That sounds great." I said, remembering how great my run-through of this game was.

"You know that means you'll have to come over again, right?" She said smiling. She seemed like she was looking forward to it as well.

"Oh, well that's a deal breaker." I said sarcastically, smiling just as excitedly.

We spent the next few hours playing, only taking breaks to eat a couple of Hot Pockets and go to the bathroom. Even though I had played the game twice before, I really enjoyed it. I knew when all of the jump-scare moments were, so I didn't have much of a reaction, but Kate did. She almost threw the controller a few times. To be fair, I was intentionally making it so that she was playing when we got to those parts. While I was playing, she watched anxiously while she kind cuddled into my arm. I don't know why she did, but I obviously didn't mind. Her warmth was really pleasant.

We reached a natural stopping point in the game and I looked at the time on my phone. It was 8:37 p.m. and had been dark out for several hours. It was about time that I leave.

"Kate, I should get going." I said.

"You don't have to go. I don't mind." She said, seeming very intent on having me stay for whatever reason.

"Yeah but I bet your parents would." I said, fearing a brutal death if they learned that I had stayed much longer than I had already. I stood up, grabbed my backpack, and started towards the door. Kate followed.

"Alright." She said as we walked. She opened the door for me and said "Bye Humphrey. I had fun, despite…'things'.". She leaned in and gave me a hug goodbye.

I returned it and said, "Me too. I'll have to come back to finish that game."

"Definitely. Are you sure you're going to be alright?" she asked. We broke the embrace, and she looked at me, clearly concerned.

"I'm fine." I said back. That damned phrase appeared again, but it was more intentional this time.

"I thought I said don't lie to me again." She said, with a hint of seriousness.

"And I thought I said don't worry about me." I said, with the same gravity. She got my point. I walked away, but before she closed the door behind me, I said "Bye Kate. Have a nice night."

"Bye Humph." She said once again. With that said, she closed the door and I entered my car. My drive home was short. I guess it was really convenient that she lived so close. I was really going to miss her, if only for a few hours until school tomorrow.

At my house, I exited my car, collected my backpack, and walked inside. On the couch in my living room sat Paul, watching TV.

"Hey Humphrey." He called out to me, without shifting his attention.

"Hey Dad. Charlie told you where I was right?"

"Yeah, you're good. So what did you guys do the whole time?" he asked as I sat down beside him on the couch.

"Oh, nothing much. I helped her with math and then we played video games. Why what's up?" I said. I decided to leave out the whole swimming thing because he would probably ask, 'Where did you get swimming trunks?'.

"Nothing. I was just curious."

"Okay." I said as I leaned my head back and let out a deep, tired breath. I was pretty exhausted after everything that happened today.

(Time skip: four hours later)

I awoke, cold, still very tired, and on my couch. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and turned it on to check the time. When the screen lit up, I winced in pain as my eyes adjusted to the new brightness. I eventually was able to read it say 12:52 a.m. In the darkness, which I was especially blind in because my eyes were just looking at my bright phone, I managed to stumble around the room until I found the stairs, and then continued to stumble up those too. On the second floor, I walked through the hallway.

Eventually, I came to a door, which I believed to be my own. I opened it, but from inside I heard Charlie's voice. She's a pretty light sleeper.

"Are you just coming home now? Oooohhh, I know what that means." She said laughing. I must have been in the wrong room.

"No, I was asleep on the couch." I said in my own defense.

"Well what are you doing in my room?" she asked.

"I can't see. I'm trying to get to bed. Goodnight." I said as I reclosed the door.

"Goodnight." She said just before the door shut. I then proceeded to get to my actual room. I walked in, took my clothes off, set my phone on my nightstand, and finally climbed in bed. Unfortunately I forgot to set my alarm.

(Time skip: 7:00 a.m., Wednesday, third day of school)

I woke up for the second time to a loud sound next to me, but it wasn't the horrible fog horn called an alarm clock that I had. Instead it was…melodic. I opened my eyes and tried to make sense of the noise. I recognized it as part of the song _Wake Me Up_ by Avicii. Where was it coming from, though? I looked to my nightstand and on it was my phone, with its screen lit up. I picked it up, and sure enough, it was playing the song as an alarm. Moments after I turned the alarm off, I got a call with the caller ID saying 'Kate'. That was weird because I didn't have her number. I answered the call.

"Hello?" I said, still unsure if it was really Kate or some elaborate prank by someone.

"Morning Humph." The caller said. It was definitely Kate's voice.

"I don't understand…" I started but couldn't really put words to my confusion. "How?" I finally got out.

"Well I had your phone and I remembered what you said about you're alarm, so I decided to have you wake up a little more pleasantly. I just guessed at the time and hoped it was before your alarm." She said, giggling as her plan had finally come to fruition.

"Clever. You beat it by half an hour, but I forgot to set it anyway. I knew you couldn't forget that for a whole day." I said also laughing.

"Yeah, well, you didn't know well enough, huh?" she said sarcastically. I laughed with her again for a moment.

"Thank you." I said. She's a really great person. Yup, I figured it out. I definitely have a crush on her.

"You're welcome. See you at school Humphrey."

"Yeah, see you." I said as I hung up.

I don't know if I could think of a better way to start the day. I figured that since I was up already, I should get ready. I walked into the bathroom and took a quick shower. For the first time in a long time, I came out smiling. It felt so weird that I looked into the mirror just to make sure. After getting dressed in a t-shirt and cargo shorts, I eventually made my way downstairs. Charlie was in the kitchen pouring herself cereal and Paul was on his phone at the table.

"Morning." He greeted.

"Morning Dad." I said beaming a grin at him.

"Coffee's not ready yet." He informed me.

"That's okay, I'll wait." I said as I walked past him and toward the fridge.

Charlie turned with her breakfast, but when she saw my demeanor, she said "What's wrong with you?"

"What?" I asked, pretending that I didn't know what she was talking about.

"You're smiling again." She said. She seemed very suspicious, as if she suspected that I may have been replaced by an alien.

"Do you expect me to frown every day of my life?" I asked sarcastically. She set her bowl on the counter and walked up behind me.

She gave me a hug and whispered in my ear "Kate gave it to you good last night huh?"

"Are you ever quiet?" I asked rhetorically. She answered anyway.

"Only when you don't want me to be." She said as she patted my back and returned to her food. I rolled my eyes.

Out of the fridge, I pulled out a bagel. I buttered it up and took it to the table, where I sat down and ate with my family. It was nice once Charlie stopped pestering me. After we finished and I drank my coffee, Charlie and I got into my car and drove off to school.

On the way she started, "So…" but she didn't lead anywhere.

"So what?" I said back.

"What happened at Kate's"

"Lots of stuff, most of which, I don't want to tell you about." I said sarcastically. I don't know why she cared or why she thought it her business to ask.

"Anything…'special' happen?" she asked, her implications clear.

"Why you want to know, I don't understand, but nothing 'special' happened." I said, mocking her choice of words. "We just did homework, talked, and played some video games."

"Mmhmm." She said smugly.

"If you weren't going to believe me when I answered, why did you ask?" I said, getting increasingly annoyed.

"Because. So, when are you going to tell her." Now she was pushing it. She had her head thoroughly up my business, and I had gotten very angry.

I yelled back, "When I'm god damn ready to!"

She was surprised at my outburst. She stared at me for a little while, and then only looked out her window. Then, there was a long awkward silence for the rest of the ride. After what seemed like forever, we arrived at school. The whole time, I was thinking about how I shouldn't have shouted at her like I did. I felt bad, but she was getting out of line. Either way and annoying or not, she is still my sister, and I didn't want her to hate me.

When she was about to get out of my car, I locked the doors and looked at her. She tried to use the door handle to no avail and eventually turned to face me, even though she looked like she really didn't want to for some reason. I figured out what it was when I saw the tears on her face.

"What Humphrey?" she asked, clearly upset.

"Charlie, I'm sorry. It's just that…that's a really sensitive topic. I don't want her to know. She's already worried about me. I've had two panic attacks in front of her. She'll only be more concerned, like you and Dad. I see the way you look at me sometimes and it really hurts me. I don't know if I can handle that coming from her too." I said, as I almost began to cry as well. She leaned over in her seat and hugged me.

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself. The way you look some days…I don't know what I'd do if you were gone." She said as she sobbed.

"You'd probably get rides from someone else." I said, chuckling a little. I was trying to relieve the tension. I knew she wanted me to say that I wasn't going to leave her, but I wasn't going to make promises that I might not keep. Thankfully, she broke her balling with a laugh. She eventually calmed down enough and let go.

"Come on, before we're late." I said as I opened my car door.

"Okay." She said as she wiped the water from her cheeks. In the time it took her to do that, I walked around the front of my mustang and opened the door for her.

When she stepped out, I said, "Don't worry. You're still pretty."

She smiled and said "Thanks." before hugging me again. After that, we grabbed our bags and walked into school. Despite a couple of awkward looks between me and Lily, the rest of the school day went normally, or what was becoming normal, and happily.

 **A/N: Hey guys. So what did you think? What does Humphrey mean by "I wasn't going to make promises that I might not keep"? Well I know, but I want you guys to simmer for a bit. Sorry that this was a bit of a bummer towards the end (at least I thought so). This chapter was very entertaining to write. It had me laughing, smiling, and a couple of times, brought a tear or two to my eyes. There were some very emotional topics and moments for me. It probably won't have the same effect on you, because it's related to my personal history with depression. Anyway, please review and have a nice day. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	5. Panty Peddler

" **The Value of a Life"**

Chapter 5 _Panty Peddler_

 **A/N: What's up guys? Sorry this chapter is a little short. Hope it isn't too bad. Anyways, Kellylad13, whom I'm sure most of you know, has this really awesome story and a couple of others but his longest running is** _ **Getting to Know You**_ **. I'm sure that a lot of you if not all of you have read it, but in his latest chapter, he gave me a shoutout in the author's note, so I thought I'd return the favor (although his viewer pool is an ocean compared to mine). Get some cross-promotion advertising. So anyway his story is great and it's definitely the biggest inspiration to this story along with my own personal life. He is also a super cool guy and a really nice person, so he is worth a look. So, on to the story…**

" **Nice chapter the whole swimming situation went smoother than I thought it would I can't believe lilly saw "Humphrey" too that might make for a few awkward moments in the future. As always your detail is impeccable and wordplay is great. also like I said in our PM'S you can feel the emotion that has gone into creating such vivid and captivating scenes until next time (or if you pm me)" -wolfies soul**

(Humphrey's POV)

(7:00 a.m. Thursday morning)

I again rose to the sound of "Wake Me Up". Despite it being earlier than what I usually set my actual alarm clock to, I kept it because it reminds me of how much Kate cares. From the minute I woke up, I've been smiling. I went over to Kate's house again yesterday, and I guess that I was still in a good mood. I was in such a good mood, in fact, that I made Charlie and myself eggs and bacon. She gave me a hug and a 'thank you' as we hurried out the house and into my car after eating.

( Time skip: 7:50 a.m.)

Charlie and I got out of my mustang and walked up to the rear entrance of the school. Before we entered, Charlie wrapped me into a big hug and pecked me on the cheek.

"Have a nice day, Humph." She said as she proceeded to walk through the doors, into the building. I didn't pretend to know what that was about.

"Okay…" I awkwardly said back, though she probably missed it. I followed her into school and turned down the hallway that led to my locker. Waiting there for me, smiling, although not with the same vigor as usual, was Kate. She looked kind of exhausted and drawn, but she did still manage to look beautiful.

"Hey Humph." She said to me as I walked over.

"Hey. Are you alright? You look a little…off." I said, not quite wanting to go into the incredible amount of detail that I could have, describing how her energetic and joyous smile is the highlight of my day.

"Yeah. I'm fine. My ear hurts a little is all." She replied, trying to regain her usual temperament. It was probably nothing, but it could be something, so I was worried.

"Oh, that's a shame. I guess we'll have to drill it out then." I said, trying to sound serious, but not being able to make it through the joke without laughing. I heard the harmonic notes of her soft giggle, and I thought maybe if I could keep her laughing now and then, I could get through the day without her real smile. I put my belongings in my locker and the two of us went off to class.

About thirty minutes later, we were in the seventh circle of hell, occasionally known as Calculus class. In it, the everyone was once again doing nothing. I decided the best use of the time would be to get some extra rest for my eyes. I still couldn't actually sleep because of the caffeine coursing through my veins, so I just settled for stillness, with my head buried into my arms. Kate was busy, actually doing her work.

I, however, was busy trying to drown out the buzzing of all of the conversations transpiring between my classmates, to no avail. A particular light commotion a few desks away from me caught my attention. It sounded like whispers, saying 'Just do it man.' but I wasn't entirely sure. I picked up my head slightly, just enough to allow my eyes to see over my forearm. Looking past Kate, I saw a group of three guys, sitting in their desks and staring at her. The two furthest from her seemed to be encouraging the closest to do something. I recognized that guy as Garth Hendricks and behind him was Candu, whose last name escapes me, and some other guy who I had never bothered to learn the name of. This looked like it was going to turn out to be interesting.

Garth never appeared to me as someone with whom I'd want to get acquainted. He just seemed like one of those people who never grew out of that self-important phase of development. I always thought that his immaturity was rather abrasive, so I shied away from talking to him, although I didn't really talk to anyone else either. Candu never really made an impression on me. He just always seemed to be one of those background, follower types. He hung out with Garth, however, so I avoided him too. That other guy, well I'd seen him with the other two before, but after that, I just stopped caring about his personality.

Anyway, it seemed like Garth was working up the courage to do whatever he was planning, so I watched intently. Suddenly he leaned forward in his chair, and his mouth opened like he was going to say something.

"Hey…umm…Kate, is it?" he said as he slowly built confidence in his speech.

Kate looked up from her textbook and politely said "Yes?" as she faced the person addressing her.

"You're the new girl who just transferred this year right?"

"Yeah, that's me." She said, smiling excitedly. She was really outgoing about meeting new people. I smiled at that thought, though the expression was hidden by my arm.

"Cool. So I was wondering…since you're new here, maybe we could catch a movie or dinner some time. Y'know…get to know each other." He said boisterously. At first, I thought it was a little funny to see how awkward and forced his proposal sounded, but that was replaced by a little worry. There was a possibility that Kate would say 'yes'. I watched her intently as she responded, a small part of me wanting him to be let down hard, like plane crash hard. Okay, a pretty big part of me.

"Umm…" she said as she thought about the answer. 'Oh God, she is thinking about saying yes. This is it. They're going to be together for the rest of high school, and I'll never have my chance with Kate.' I thought. My heart stopped as it waited for her response. "No, thank you." She said sweetly as she went back to her book. 'Oh thank god.' I thought as I let out a deep breath that I was holding and my heart started to beat again. I closed my eyes and savored the relief. I held back a laugh at how bold Garth had been, only to get shot down. Inside my mind, there were parades marching, trumpets playing, and jets flying overhead in celebration. Instead, of jumping up and cheering, I settled for another hidden smile. At least she let him down nicely.

"Oh now hold on a second, sweetheart." Garth said. I let out a sigh and thought 'Ugh, he's still trying.' He then whispered, albeit not that quietly, "Listen, I'm on the football team. I can get you serious connections around here.". Kate didn't seem to at all contemplate her decision further. She just kept working. Garth didn't take to kindly to her lack of acceptance. "Hey…" he started but was interrupted when I spoke up.

"Hey, come on. Leave her alone. She doesn't feel well." I said, actually picking my head up off of the desk to be heard. That only earned me a look of disdain from him. He did seem to at least get the message.

"I'll talk to you later then, Kate." He said as he turned back to his compatriots, muttering something unintelligible.

Kate mouthed 'Thanks' back to me, with a smile. Just then the bell rang. Kate and I sat and waited for all of the other students to leave. Garth left too after failing in an attempt to steal an inconspicuous look down her t-shirt while she was in her desk. Eventually he left too, so we got up. When I stood, I grabbed my backpack and once again hers, as it had become a habit. As Kate rose, however, seemed wobbly in her knees and almost like she was about to fall over. She managed to steady herself with a hand, anchored to her desk.

"Kate, are you okay?" I said as I rushed to her aid.

"Yeah. I just lost my balance a little." She said, as she feebly started walking out of the door. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder to hold her upright as we made it out of the class, but I was growing more concern.

"Does your ear still hurt?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Headache?"

"Yeah, a bit." She said shakily. That was even more cause for worry. I stopped her from walking.

"Kate, I think you have a pretty bad ear infection. You should probably go home." I said, connecting the earache, headache, and dizziness.

"No. I'll make it." She said as she tried to stand up more one her own. I still didn't have enough confidence in it to let go of her.

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Will you at least tell your parents to take you to the doctor after school?" I asked. I still didn't think she should stay in school but if she really wanted to, I wasn't going to make her leave. Also, if she left, it would really harsh my mood for the rest of the day.

"Okay." She said, defeated.

"And let me drive you home?" I said, further wanting to insure her safety. There was a fairly large possibility that she could pass out on the walk home and I couldn't have that.

She smiled and looked up at me, before sarcastically saying, "Ah, so that's what you wanted. I get it.". I laughed, despite how much I really insisted upon it.

"Very funny. I think my sense of humor is rubbing off on you."

"No, I'm funnier." she said as we continued walking into the next class.

(Time skip: sixth period, lunch)

Kate and I again sat down at our table, where we waited for Lily and possibly Charlie.

"So who was that guy in first period?" she asked, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Oh, that's Garth. Quite the charmer." I said, sarcastically. I instantly regretted it as I realized Kate might actually agree. I guess he was pretty muscular if you could get past his annoying disposition.

"Yeah…right." She said, reciprocating the sarcasm. That was a relief. "So do you know him?" she asked.

"Not really. I don't really talk to anyone anyway." I said. Oh shit. I didn't mean to let that out. Now she's gonna ask questions about it.

"What do you mean? How do you not talk to anyone? You never shut up." She said, lowering her eyebrows interrogatively. 'Fuck. Okay, just play it off.' I thought.

"Ah, you know…" I said, attempting to completely dodge the question. It didn't work.

"No, I don't. In fact, you never even talk to Salty, Shakey, or Mooch. What's up with you?" She said, sounding increasingly frustrated. I think she might have been trying to piece everything together.

"Umm…" I said, as I searched for an answer. I noticed Lily walking towards us. "…hi Lily!" I said, causing Kate's attention to shift from me. She knew that this topic was very personal, so I hoped that she wouldn't bring it up in front of her sister. She looked at me almost threateningly as Lily sat down.

"Hey guys." She said merrily.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Nothing much. You?"

"Same." I said as I looked over to Kate, to see her staring at her food and not eating it. "Oh, I'm driving you and Kate home from school." I added.

"Again? Why?" she asked.

"Kate's not feeling so hot so I wasn't going to let her walk home." Lily nodded, unopposed to a free ride.

Lily and I finished up our meals, and I threw out Kate's for her. She hadn't touched it. She seemed really unenergetic and slightly melancholy. It was probably due to more than just her being sick. I really wanted to tell her about me. It seemed like not knowing was troubling her a lot. I had to tell her sometime soon.

The rest of school crawled to an end. It went especially slowly because Kate wasn't talking. She did look a little unsettled, but she more seemed upset. I think it was with me. In history and P.E., she barely even looked at me, and when she did, she frowned and looked away again. She was really making this decision hard for me. We walked out of school with Lily to my car, after telling Charlie what was happening, and this time Lily didn't argue about Kate sitting in the front. The ride to their house was next to silent, apart from Lily playing games on her phone, blissfully ignorant of the tension.

When I pulled into the driveway, I saw Kate's hand reach for her seatbelt buckle. I grabbed it gently and said "Wait a minute.". Lily stopped too, but I said, "You can go Lily." and she did so. When she exited the car and proceeded to go inside, I turned back to Kate.

"What do you want Humphrey?" she asked, a little harshly. The way she said it felt like she cut me with a knife, a fucking HUGE knife.

"Are you mad at me?" I said softly, as I looked her directly in the eyes. She let out a sigh before responding.

"A little." She said. I felt my heart sink inside my chest. "I mean, why can't you just tell me?". I looked forward, through the windshield.

"Kate, it's not like I don't trust you or that I don't realize that you just want to know what's going on with me or that I think it's too personal for you to know. I want to tell you but I just can't."

"Why not?" she asked, in more of her normal, sweet tone, but it was saddened. "Are you sick?"

"No. I just want you to keep thinking of me as normal Humphrey and not worry as much as you do already." I said, tearing slightly. She noticed how much emotion I had behind this and gave up.

"I can't help but worry. You're my best friend and something's wrong with you. I just want you to be okay." She said, as she wrapped her arms around me.

"I am okay. Please, don't worry about me. I can't take it from you and Charlie." I said as I did the same to her. She sobbed lightly into the embrace. After a minute, we both calmed down.

"You should get inside before Lily thinks I kidnapped you." I said to her, earning a giggle.

"Yeah, okay." She said, and after those past few hours when she had been without it, her smile finally returned. I felt like suddenly the Earth started spinning again. She got out of the car, grabbed her bag from the trunk, and walked up to the door of the house. "You coming in?" she asked me. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't.

"No. Sorry. I feel kinda bad about not spending any time with Charlie or driving her home lately."

"Okay."

Before she entered, I said "Bye Kate, and get that ear checked out."

She turned around and while continuing to smile replied "Humphrey, it's not fair that you get to worry about me but I can't.". I was glad that she was making light of the conversation. It made me think that she wasn't going to dwell on it.

"Sorry." I said back, laughing, as I pulled out of the driveway. In my car, I let out a large sigh. 'Too many girls have been crying in my car this week.' I thought. I drove the five blocks back home, thinking about how and when I was going to finally tell Kate about my depression. Nothing came to mind.

Inside my home, I was greeted by Charlie, who was wearing shorts and a hoodie. I thought that made absolutely no sense, but I smiled at her anyway.

"Aww. Did Kate kick you out after the sex this time?" She said, happilychastising me.

"Go fuck yourself Charlie." I said as I walked past her, up the stairs.

"I just might." She said back.

"Gross." I retorted, thoroughly disgusted. She laughed, reveling in how uncomfortable she can make me. A few minutes later, I came back down. I figured that I might as well spend some time with her like I said I was going to. She was sitting on the couch watching TV. I sat next to her.

"Sorry about ditching you the past couple of days." I said.

"That's fine. So did you tell her yet?" she asked. She was bringing it up again. I already told her once how I feel about telling Kate.

"Charlie…" I said with a voice that implied 'Don't push me'.

"Sorry." She said back. "Or… I could call Kate up now and tell her myself." She said as she pulled out her phone from her pocket and held it in the air. "I think I just might do that."

"Charlie, I'm not kidding." I said, not wanting to deal with her particular brand of bullshit.

"What's her last name? I want to make sure I dial up the right one." She said as she turned her phone on.

"Charlie, I swear to God I'll murder you. Stop." I said, getting increasingly angry.

"Make me." She said as she looked me straight in the eye, challenging me like a wild dog, but smiling deviously. I lost it. I lunged forward at her, but she managed to kick me off and run away. I regained my bearings and chased her around the house, outside, back inside, and up the stairs. Eventually, she locked herself in the upstairs bathroom and cackled to herself maniacally in victory. Or so she thought.

"Fine." I exclaimed, exasperated. I went into her room, opened up the top drawer on her dresser, and pulled out a set of her panties. I walked back to the bathroom door and said, "Charlie, if you say anything to Kate, I'll sell your underwear at school."

"What?!" she yelled from inside the bathroom.

I continued, "I can make A LOT of money. Guys at that school are wicked horny.". That was all that she needed before I could hear her walking to the door. I backed up in the hallway.

She opened the door and said, "Ok, it's a draw.". She held up her hands in the surrender. As soon as I saw her phone in her hand, I lunged at her again. This time, I tackled her to the ground, although I did take care to land on my back so that she wouldn't hit her head or anything. I grabbed her wrist and took the device from her. I had to make sure she didn't send anything already. I checked through her messages and found nothing. I then looked through her contacts and discovered that she didn't even have Kate's number.

"I hate you." I said, handing her phone back after this realization. She smiled back at me as she sat up on my chest, straddling it with her knees. She leaned down and gave me a small kiss on the cheek before getting off of me to let me up.

"You weren't really going to sell my underwear were you?" She said as she gathered her panties from the ground, where I had dropped them.

"I was waiting for you to give me a reason not to. From a business standpoint, it was nothing but profitable." I said sarcastically as I rose from the ground as well.

"Okay Mr. Business man. What do you want for dinner?" she asked, laughing with me.

"Pizza sound good?"

"Yeah sure. I'll order it." She said as she started to walk away.

"Okay. I'll pay." I said. Even though she was a maddening little vagrant and only my sister, it was still the chivalrous thing to do.

"I guess you do have profits from your panty selling company." She said, mocking me. With that said, chivalry had just been thrown off the roof.

"Alright then, never mind. I guess I won't pay. Corporate's on my ass about my budget anyway." I countered. She walked back over to me and gave me another small kiss.

"Thank you." She said, turning around and walking away again.

"And what's with all the kisses?" I said as I wiped my cheeks of her affection. I heard her giggle from another room. I really don't know what was up with her. Maybe she's trying to be annoying because I'm feeling better. Maybe it's all part of a secret and elaborate plan to get me to stay in a bad mood. That sounds more like the real answer.

(Time skip: 7:13 p.m.)

I felt a vibration in my pocket **(not that kind of vibration)**. I pulled out my phone to see a new text from Kate.

 **(I think you guys can understand that H is Humphrey and K is Kate)**

K: "Hey Humph. Got back from Doc's. U were right. Ear infection. I'm on antibiotics and pain meds."

H: "Sorry to hear that. U ok?"

K: "Still hurts a bit. I'm afraid to take the pills. They said I might get a little loopy."

H: "Take'em. U'll be fine. So u not goin to school?"

K: "Ok and no I'm not. Miss u :/"

H: "Yeah u2."

That was the end of the conversation. I didn't feel like talking anymore. I was getting a little sad. What was I going to do for a whole day without Kate? Tomorrow is going to be rough.

 **A/N: Hey guys. Sorry this one is a little bit short. There didn't seem to be much more that I could add to this day. Before any of you ask, the third guy with Garth was not Hutch. Just thought you guys might think that. Anyway, what'd you guys think? Good? Probably not like usual right? :). I also just wanted to add that if you guys want, feel free to p.m. me about literally anything. I like talking to all of you and everyone that I have talked to is really cool, so I invite you to have a conversation. I like to stay in touch with my readers because I wouldn't keep going without you guys and your constant support. That's it. Have a nice day guys and see you in like two days. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	6. Adult Supervision

" **The Value of a Life"**

Chapter 6 _Adult Supervision_

 **A/N: So I definitely have some explaining to do. Basically, I haven't been in the right state of mind to write for a few days. I tried and it came out dark and angry and it was completely not what I wanted. Trust me when I say that if I had posted something, it would have ruined this story. It's better now and the creative juices are flowing, so I hope you like this chapter. Special thanks to Squid84 for letting me vent to him a little.**

" **Great chapter as always. I could see the whole selling your panties conversation playing out between me and my sister. That has to be my favorite part of this whole chapter... lol. I guess we will see how well Humphrey handles Kate not being in school tomorrow in the next chapter. Keep up the good work :)" –Squid84**

(Humphrey's wretched POV)

Rough didn't even begin to describe my day. It began and ended with a dull throbbing pain in the back of my skull. I couldn't decide if it felt like there was blood pooling around the rearward part of my brain or if it was being sucked away from it. My stomach was so appalled by the mere thought of getting out of bed, let alone staying that way for 6 hours, that I threw up twice. I wasn't going to go home. I would need my sick days, plus I knew that I wasn't actually sick. I felt seconds away from crying at all times. I had felt pretty good the past couple of days, but I felt my nerves coming back full force as I started to preoccupy my thoughts with anything and everything that could possibly cause me anxiety. It was as if I was planning my life out fifty years in advance, and stressing about every decision that I would make up until then, at the same time.

I was in misery and wishing that some on would put me out of it. I found myself hoping for to pass out so that the day would finally be over and I could get some rest. While I was agonizing over just about literally everything from homework this week, to finals this year, graduating next year, to worrying about college, to planning for my retirement, I couldn't help but think of Kate.

For a moment, I was mad at her. I was angry that she could be so calm, friendly, enthusiastic, and perfect. I couldn't even shower without finding something to hate about myself. Worst of all, the one thing that she does worry about is me. I feel like I have two big sisters who are both tugging at my cheek and patronizingly telling me how cute I am, while dealing with the actual problems of my life at the grown-ups table. I couldn't stay mad at her for longer than it took to get these thoughts out of me, however.

I asked myself why I had a crush on her, when all that it did was make me nervous. I started with her looks, because it was impossible to escape the fact that she was gorgeous. Next, I thought about how she is always smiling in a way that radiated self-esteem. I thought about her golden eyes that seemed infinitely more valuable than the ore that they represented. I thought about all of the ways that she cared about the people around her, including me; especially me.

I remembered her concern for me as I trembled in front of her, and how she begged me for an answer only to meet a stone wall. I pondered the question that had been boring at my mind like a drill for the past few days; 'When am I going to tell her?'. A big part of me wanted to say never. I'd seen what the information does to people, between my sister, dad, psychologist, and guidance counselor. It makes them look at you like you're some cornered animal who will hurt itself the moment that they turn their backs, like you can't control yourself. Nothing was ever so…aggravating as receiving a look that deems you unfit to be able to handle your own emotions.

I tried to keep myself from thinking at all. My mind was going to…dark places. I could bring myself to different subject matter, but not stop entirely. I settled for thinking more of Kate. I thought of her perfect smile that makes me forget that I have problems. I remembered her laugh and how it could permanently affix a happy grin to a tiger. I thought about her warm, comforting voice that made me wish that I was deaf to everything else. Last of all I remembered the hugs she had given me. No place had ever felt as cozy or as welcoming or calm and pacifying as her arms. It was eighteen hours from the last time I saw her, and I already missed her like nothing I had before.

The fifth period bell just rang. It was time to go to lunch. I shambled down the halls to the cafeteria. On the way, I walked past Charlie. I had never felt so lonely and devoid of contact in my life. I desperately needed to touch someone, as weird as it sounds, and know that they loved me back. Charlie was at her locker. I stopped in my tracks and turned around. I came from her right side, and almost brought her to the ground as I wrapped my arms so tightly around her, like I was holding her over the edge of a cliff.

When she felt me, she lifted up her arms in surprise, screaming "Ah!", and looked down at my head, firmly buried into her shoulder.

"Humphrey, what are you doing?" she asked because I never displayed this much affection to her, particularly not in public.

"I love you Charlie." I said to her, in a wretched, solemn voice, cracking slightly. I felt tears welling up in my eyes, but not enough to break free and run down my cheeks.

"Humph, everyone is watching." She said, still suspending her hands above me in disbelief. I couldn't care if this was broadcasted on national television. I needed this. I only hugged her tighter. Taking heed of my response, she finally brought her arms down above me and said "I love you too Humph.". All though it wasn't certain, I'm fairly sure that she meant it. She hugged me just as tightly. After a moment, we parted. I felt much better, but still pretty mopey. I wiped my eyes instinctively, despite the lack of actual tears. "There now we're both completely embarrassed. Happy?" she said, trying to smile, though I could tell that she was caught between happy and saddened. I chuckled a little and she wiped real tears from her eyes.

"And you're crying." I said, playfully teasing her.

"Don't act like I didn't see you wipe your face." She told me indignantly. I just stared at her for the next few seconds. I was really happy that I actually had someone there for me right then, and that it was my sister. Eventually, I did want to get away from this dreadfully bitter-sweet moment.

"I'm going to lunch. You coming?" I asked.

"I'm not hungry, but I'll come." She said, following me down the hall.

"Me too." I said, before promptly shutting up for the duration of the walk.

We spent the next few minutes sitting at our usual table, though it was decidedly unusual. It was very clearly missing something important. I was silently sitting next to Charlie and even once Lily made her way over, it was still lacking something monumental, and I knew exactly what, or more accurately who, it was.

"H-How's Kate?" I said, looking up at Lily through bloodshot and tired eyes. Lily met them with her own, casually shy glance. Even though it was only an ear infection, I found myself dreading the worst, as if Kate could actually die from the relatively minor affliction. I had droopy bags on either side of my nose, and I'm sure I looked as sick as I felt.

"Jesus Humphrey, you look like shit." She said, still not answering the question.

"Kate." I said, sadly bringing her back to topic.

"Yeah, she's fine, a little drugged up, but fine. Have you been crying?" She said, sounding more nosy than concerned. I intentionally didn't answer and Lily definitely noticed, but she didn't say anything. I thought that she looked like she was saving it for later.

Lunch went bye quickly, and soon I was collecting my backpack to leave. Charlie gave me a quick hug and a goodbye before departing. Lily seemed intentionally dragging behind, though it would defy all sensible logic. When Charlie was finally out of sight, she came over to me.

"Humphrey." She said, gaining my attention.

"Y-Yes?" I said timidly. She seemed a little too purposeful and I was intimidated, despite being nearly a foot taller than her.

"What's wrong with you?" she said in a more accusatory tone than I was expecting.

"I-I…umm…nothing?" I said with about as much conviction as a mouse.

"And what's with the stuttering?" she said, sounding more and more like and interrogator with each passing second.

"Umm…" I started but got interrupted. To be fair, I was going anywhere with the sentence. I was getting really nervous. She seemed too knowing.

"It's Kate, right?" she said. 'Shit.' I thought. I looked red in the face and probably like a scared kitten. How was she reading me so well? I couldn't respond. I had never been so intimidated by a little, 110 pound girl before, except maybe Kate. "It is, isn't it?" she said, more convinced of herself.

"H-How did you…what m-makes you say that?" I said, trying to play on any scrap of reasonable deniability that could have existed.

"The way you look at her and always blush, the way you're always standing by her like the secret service, the way you're nervous right now. I have a lot of evidence." She said boastfully. I had no clue that she noticed any of those things.

"I-I…you're right." I said with a defeated sigh. "I can't help it. She's amazing." I said with stars in my eyes.

"Yeah, right. So say something to her." She suggested, although it came out a lot like a command.

"I-I…I can't." I said. "She doesn't see me like that." I admitted, feeling six inches tall.

"I don't know what Kate thinks ever, but I do know that none of it ever makes sense." Lily said back, looking at me sympathetically. Her words gave no consolation, despite her trying.

"H-How long have you known about me?" I asked, embarrassed that my ruse had been demolished.

"A little while. Don't worry. I won't tell her." She said, smiling too excitedly. That sounded almost like a threat. This little freshman girl is terrifying.

"You…you aren't going to blackmail me, are you?" I asked, fearing an impending ultimatum.

"Noooo…" she said in a long drawn out word. She was still smiling. I was pretty sure that I shouldn't believe her.

"Umm…okay. S-So, are you okay to walk home alone?" I asked in an attempt to get my mind off of what she just said. The longer that I dwelled on it, the more harrowing it seemed.

"Yeah. I walked here didn't I?" she said in a confidently sarcastic way.

"Okay then. I-I'll see you later then."

"Okay." she said as she turned and walked away from me. That may have been the most unpleasant conversation I've ever had, considering the embarrassment, the nervousness, and what seemed like an attempt at intimidation. I shook my head and started walking, because it would get more unpleasant with more thought.

The rest of school continued with my unhappiness, but since lunch, had the added worry that either Lily would tell Kate how I feel about her or that she would hang it over my head for favors. Knowing her, she'd probably ask me to kill someone, and then I'd have to deal with that too. School ended with an immense amount of homework for the weekend that I probably wasn't going to do. Charlie and I walked to my car and I thought about asking Lily if she wanted a ride but she already said she was fine with walking, and I couldn't afford to seem weak in front of her with what she know knows. I'm way over-thinking this. She's an adorable, innocent little girl who has so far never hurt anyone…as far as I know. Maybe she killed a few people to keep them silent. What if she asks me to bury a body for her? Yup, way over-thinking it.

At home, I sat around for two hours, doing nothing and trying not to think about anything. I just wanted to close my eyes and enjoy some silent stillness. While I was failing at this, I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. I turned it on to see a new text from Kate. I smiled because, even though it seemed obvious, the one thing that I didn't think to do was talk to Kate. Now that it crossed my mind, it was all that I wanted to do.

K: "Hey Humph, I need ur help"

H: "With what?"

K: "Need to take meds. Parents not home."

H: "So?"

K: "Last time I locked myself in the bathroom to hide from aliens"

H: "Can't Lily watch you?"

K: "She's supposed to but she's just staying in her room. Can you come over?"

H: "I'll be right there"

With that I locked my phone and returned it to my pants. I didn't want to question her further because she seemed kinda desperate and it was pretty important. I walked down the hall to Charlie's room and opened the door to see her on her bed, using her laptop.

"Can I help you?" she said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I'm going to Kate's. Tell Dad where I am." I said in a hurried tone.

"Ah, she said she's horny huh?" she said, laughing her ass off at what apparently passed for a joke. I was not nearly as amused.

"That's not funny. She's on medication, that's not right." I said indignantly. Her comment hurt my chivalrous bravado.

"Drug fueled sex marathon sounds like just what you need." She said, stilling attempting humor.

"I'm done with this conversation. Just tell him." I said as I closed the door and left the room.

"I'll tell him you roofied your girlfriend!" she yelled through the door.

"I still know where your underwear is!" I yelled back, walking down the stairs. She fell silent after that. Silent Charlie is my favorite kind.

At Kate's house, I knocked on the door loudly. The door opened much sooner than I had expected, and behind it was a bouncy, energetic looking Kate, clad in blue, plaid pajama bottoms and a yellow tank-top.

"Hi Humph!" She almost squealed as she hugged me in the entryway.

"Hi Kate." I said back plainly, but smiling. Her excitement is very warming.

"Come on in." she said as she led me into the house. I obliged her and followed her to the couch in her living room.

"So how are you feeling?" I asked, remembering the actual purpose for me being there.

"Oh, I'm alright. I was waiting until you got here to take anything."

"Got it. So what happens when you do?" I said, wondering if I should be making sure she doesn't slip and fall or if I need to make sure she doesn't choke on her tongue. I'd like to choke on her tongue. Well now it's weird.

"Well I don't really know. I sorta blacked out last time and my parents told me what happened."

"Now are you sure there weren't any real aliens around?" I said in a voice of seriousness, broken by bursts of laughter.

"Haha. Why, were you looking forward to getting probed?" she retorted. I laughed at her comment and looked her in the eyes. They were happy and at ease. They reminded me of burning wood in a fire place, in that they seemed to brighten the room and make it more inhabitable. I had never been more contented with awkwardly and silently staring at someone before in my life. Something about Kate made me want to just be around her and not have that ruined with needless, forced conversation, even though I relished the thought of her voice. I was fixating so intently on that voice, that I could have sworn that I heard it. It seemed to be getting louder and more apparent. I realized that I was actually hearing it.

"-mphrey. Humphrey." Kate called, grinning madly.

"W-What?" I said as I tried to make sense of the sounds in my ears. She was laughing at my inattention.

"I was saying that I'm gonna go take the medicine." She repeated as she walked into the kitchen. From the room, I could hear the rattle of a medicine bottle. Suddenly it was interrupted by speech. "What were you thinking about so hard?" she asked from behind the wall that separated us.

"Why?"

"You were smiling a bunch. Just curious." She said, cutely giggling some more.

"Umm…" you and only ever you "Oh nothing." I said, admittedly unconvincingly, but she didn't press the issue, though

"K." she responded.

"So how long until the drugs kick in?" I asked, thinking back to how I actually have to supervise her. It was nice to think that she actually trusted me enough to take care of her while she is on heavy medication, especially knowing that she blacks out.

"Umm…like a half hour." She said, walking back into the living room.

"Okay. What do you want to do while you have a few minutes of sobriety?" I asked, joking to myself, even though it was decidedly not funny. I don't know what's wrong with me. Usually the sarcasm and the humor just flows off my tongue, sometimes disastrously. I couldn't even make a simple pun. She giggled to herself anyway. It couldn't have been a response to what I said because it wasn't even recognizable as an attempt at a joke.

"We could…umm…watch a movie or play Last of Us, whichever you want?" she offered while she sat down next to me. She was pretty close too. Her thigh was like two inches from mine. So now I'm counting down the inches between us. Great. I'm reaching all new levels of pathetic.

"Well if you're going to be completely out of it in thirty minutes, we should probably do something passive like the movie." I said. Why did I say that? She didn't want a long winded, overly complicated answer like that. I should have just said 'movie sounds good'. Why can't I do anything right?

"Movie it is." She said as she left the couch to walk over to her ps4. I once again noticed how she bent over to turn on the console. I tried really hard to not stare, but it seemed like every inanimate object in the room was pointing a finger at her, beckoning my gaze. Her tank-top slightly rid up the small of her back, leaving uncovered the slim hemming of her light blue underwear. 'Stop it Humphrey.' I told myself. 'Stop being some perverted asshole. What kind of shitty person lets a girl drug herself up so he can stare at her ass?'. My subconscious was rather angry at me tonight. "Hey do you want some popcorn or something?" she asked, grounding me back to earth. She walked back over to me, controller in hand.

"Umm yeah. Popcorn sounds good." I answered.

"Ok, I'll get some." She said as she started towards the Kitchen.

"N-N-N-No. You're sick and about to trip balls. I'm supposed to be helping.". I jumped from the couch to walk past her. "Where is it?"

"Cabinet on the left.". She smiled back her gratitude. I found a small bag of uncooked popcorn and prepared it in the microwave. While it was popping, I asked "Anything to drink?"

"Water please." She said so sweetly that I needed to be checked for hyperglycemia. Really on par with those awesome medical jokes that everyone is telling me they want to hear. Idiot. I got her and myself the bottles of water out of the fridge and when the popcorn was ready, I put it in a bowl and brought it back to the sofa.

"Thanks." Kate said as I set the snack in front her, and claimed my seat at her side.

"That's what I'm here for. Just don't call me Alfred." I joked. Great, now I'm making Batman jokes. My wit's falling apart.

"You're more of a Jarvis." She commented back. It was like she knew that I was calling myself a nerd. How does she know exactly what to say?

"Isn't Jarvis a robot?"

"Umm…not in the comic books." She said behind a blush.

"You read comic books?" I asked, wildly curious. I had heard about that before, but I never would have thought that she would be correcting me on the canon of Marvel comics. She looked back and smiled that perfect smile, revealing glossy, porcelain looking teeth.

"I just know things." She replied confidently.

"Yeah, okay." I said sarcastically as I turned my attention to the large TV in front of us. "So what do you want to watch?"

"Umm…" she mumbled while skimming through the selection on Netflix. "How about Mr. Peabody and Sherman?" she asked, enthusiastically. Even if I wanted to, although I didn't because I love animated movies, I couldn't say no to her. If she asked me to jump out of a plane in that same way, I'd ask for a parachute on the way down.

"Sounds great." I answered. She played the movie, turned off the lights in the room, and as it started, she slid to the end of the couch and put her legs up on my lap. I gave my best attempt at a glare toward her and she just laughed it off. Then she moved back over and leaned against me, to where we were shoulder to shoulder. The skin of my arm where her shoulder touched burned at the contact. It was somehow the most pleasant kind of burn imaginable though. It tingled in the weirdest way that was a little unnerving but at the same time, gladly welcomed. I was caught between uncomfortably nervous and extraordinarily relaxed with her on me. Before we got too comfortable, I figured that I should ask something.

"So Kate, are you going to be okay when I leave?" I asked, thinking that eventually she would get sick of my shit and kick me out.

"Oh…". She looked and sounded incredibly disappointed. I didn't realize that anything that I said could have offended or upset her. Nothing seemed less appealing than upsetting Kate.

"Is something wrong?" I asked, beating myself up for saddening her.

"Nothing…I just…I was hoping you could stay. You can leave whenever you want to." She said as she sadly looked at the floor. Man, was that a relief. It was actually quite flattering.

"Kate, I don't want to leave. I figured you wouldn't want me to sleep over." I said, chuckling slightly. It was surely a confidence boost to have her wanting me around.

"No, it'll be just like old times." She said and that naturally glowing smile returned.

"Shhh…the movies starting." I said sarcastically.

"Sorry." She whispered back lightheartedly. About forty minutes of the movie went by and it was very enjoyable. The jokes were funny and the art style was appreciable. At this time however, Kate seemed to be leaning more heavily into me. When I shifted my attention from the screen to her, I noticed that she was snoring lightly and smiling in her sleep. She looked undeniably angelic and peaceful in that state. The antibiotics and pain killers must have really knocked her out. It was kind of a bummer because I was hoping to see what her drug addled mind had in store. Oh well.

I waited until the end of the movie, to see if she woke up but she hardly stirred, aside from squeezing my arm tightly, and the occasional shiver. I put an end to that when I basically used it as an excuse to slip my arm from her grasp and wrap it around her. Her smile widened adorably in reaction and she laid still. When the film did come to an end, I met an impasse about what to do with Kate. She looked awfully at ease, but I can't imagine that sleeping on the couch with me under her would be good for her back. I also don't think she'd appreciate it very much when she woke up after spending several hours sleeping on me on the couch, despite how much I'd love for that to happen.

I nudged her shoulder, attempting to rouse her to no avail. I whispered her name in her ear with no response. Next, I tried getting up but she only slumped over onto the couch with a groan. I sighed audibly at the predicament. Eventually, I decided that I had to get her up to her bed. I wrapped one of her arms over my shoulder and picked her up under her knees and back. As I grabbed her, she purred softly in her sleep. She'd kill me if I told her that. I carried her to the stairs and as I walked her head dipped backwards, so I shifted her so that it rested on my bicep, or what passed for a bicep. I struggled up the stairs, not at all because she was over-weight, but because I'm not all that buff. God, I'm backpedaling in my thoughts. I'm losing it.

On the second floor, I carefully entered a vacant room with pink walls that was very clearly hers. It seemed too tidy to be Lily's and too adolescent to be her parents', but it fit her perfectly. I carefully laid her on the bed, but on it I noticed a small beige teddy bear. It seemed oddly familiar for some reason. I'd have to ask her about it in the morning. I did my best to tuck her into the bed while she was in it which is just as complicated as it sounds.

I exited the room and in the upstairs hall I saw three other open doors. In one, I could see a sleeping Lily on her bed, a master bedroom, which I assumed to be their parents', and a bathroom. Most importantly, I didn't see a guest bedroom. Considering the danger of Kate accidently swallowing a hair dryer or something, I knew I had to be somewhere close. I wasn't going to sleep in her parents' bed, the bathroom, and sure as hell not Lily's, so I walked into Kate room, sat in the corner and rested my head on my knees. She did invite me to stay over, but hopefully I can wake up before she does and make this seem less weird. Before I forgot and went to sleep, I texted Charlie, saying "Staying at Kate's. She's high as a kite and needs an adult, so I'm the next best thing.". I didn't wait for a response when I silenced my phone and nodded off to a not particularly deep slumber.

 **A/N: So like I said, sorry for the wait. Please tell me what you thought because I was really worried about this chapter for a while and I want to know how it came out. Please don't make me beg because I'll do it, puppy dog eyes and everything. A few things I needed to say before I signed off: Firstly, this story passed a thousand views, so I had to post today, secondly Spc. Knox gave me a shout out in his story, The Unlikely Future 2, so I needed to return the favor here, thirdly part of the reason that I couldn't write (sorry again for that) was this How to Train Your Dragon fanfiction called Chasing Thunderstorms by Foxy's Girl. It's really amazing and I couldn't get my mind off of it. It is pretty long though so you've been warned. The author is fantastic and very uniquely creative in all of her stories, and if you think the way I show character's thoughts is detailed, you haven't seen anything. That's it.**

 **See you next chapter**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	7. Drugs Are Bad, M'kay?

" **The Value of a Life"**

Chapter 7 _Drugs Are Bad, M'kay?_ **(Rewritten)**

 **Sorry this is so long. 6.7k chapter.**

 **Forgot the favorite review when I first posted. So I'll put two :/**

" **Great chapter i believe that it came out quite nicely and look at humphrey the perfect gentlemen if i was in the predicament kates in i wouldnt mind waking up to humphrey next to me ;) and oh the puns lol there great! Everytime you come out with a new chapter i go on a roller coaster of emotions excitement when i see the chapter blliss when im reading the chapter and sadness when it over" –Wolfies soul**

" **Awesome chapter. You gotta love over thinking any situation, as it usually leads to very bad thoughts or to high of expectations.. lol. I love how you compared Kates eyes to the tranquility of wood burning in a fireplace. Nice choice of words there. Also It seems as if someones hormones are invading their thoughts as they become more comfortable. We shall see where the road leads ;) Very good work Nick, keep it up." –Squid84**

(Humphrey's POV)

My eyes shot open to a loud, rhythmic sound seemingly inches away from my ears, rousing me from a very pleasant dream involving me, Kate, and some large piles of money. Once I made sense of the music, I exclaimed a hushed "Oh shit.". I forgot to turn off the alarm on my phone, greatly interfering with the plan to wake up before Kate. Frustration included, it was hard not to smile as I turned it off, remembering who set the alarm in the first place. Thinking about that person, I looked from my phone to a lightly grumbling and squirming form on the bed in front of me and I froze as to not make any further sound. Eventually, Kate's stirring subsided with a sigh and I stopped holding my breath.

I got up and walked to the bathroom and washed my face in the sink to cleanse the sleep from my eyes. The cold water energized my loose, tired skin and I looked up from my cupped hands to see myself in the mirror. The same, cold, blue eyes as always stared back at me grudgingly, so I splashed another cold wave of water into my cheeks, turned off the water and walked out into the hall to think about what my next move would be. Kate was probably still sleeping off the drugs and I hadn't said a word to Lily, so breakfast would be a nice gesture, but I couldn't leave Kate to go get some. I'd have to tell her sister to watch her, and then I could ask what they would eat.

I walked down the hall to Lily's room and stood in the entryway, peering through the still open door. I knocked gingerly on the doorframe. Lily resentfully picked her head up from her pillow and looked over her shoulder at me with glaring eyes. She looked absolutely ridiculous lying on her front on top of her blankets, with her limbs spread out like a starfish over her bed, and trying to have an angry expression.

"What?" she asked grumpily.

"Sorry it's just…I…I was going to get breakfast but I didn't want to just leave Kate." I said, burning a hole into her carpet with my eyes as then noticed her attire, a blue tank-top and black sleep shorts. "I-I should have waited for you to come down so you could get dressed, sorry.". She sat up on her bed to face me.

"Humphrey, it's like seven in the morning on a Saturday." She grumbled, rubbing her eyes tiredly. She noticed my flushed, timid expression and sighed. "It's ok Humphrey, I'm not naked or anything.". I brought my eyes up to make contact with hers and I saw her smiling kindly at me. I grinned back, happy that I hadn't actually angered her with the intrusion. "So, you said something about breakfast." She said, encouraging me to continue conversation.

"Y-Yeah. Do you guys like McDonalds?" I continued, annoyed by my persistent stuttering.

"Yeah, that sounds great."

"Well, what would you like?"

"A couple of sausage egg mcmuffins please." She entreated sweetly.

"Okay. What do you think for your sister?" I asked, holding back a chuckle and toothy smile at how nice Lily can be when she's not threatening me.

"Probably the same." She suggested, rising to her feet from the bed and starting toward me.

"Starbucks?" I asked as she came closer to me.

"Vanilla Frappuccinos." She answered, tiptoeing further. It was like sharks, slowly creeping towards prey.

"Got it." I spouted nervously as she stepped to within feet of me, staring me down quizzically. "U-Umm…" I said as I tried to speak, only to have the words catch in my throat, and she stepped forward once more, so I had to look down to see her pale face, covered delicately by almost purely white bangs, probably a whole foot below mine.

"Why do you always look so scared?" she asked, through narrowed eyes.

"I-I...umm…I'm not scared." I declared, possibly able to intimidate a fly in the room. I shifted uncomfortably on my toes and fidgeted my clammy hands at my sides. She leaned forward slowly and menacingly, before her arms moved abruptly and violently. I nearly jumped out of my skin, but she only reached around my shoulders and gave me a quick hug.

"Not scared my ass." She said, giggling to herself. I stood there, growing increasingly wary of the power that she was gaining over me, a truly terrifying thought, before deciding that a change of subject was in order.  
"So, you're going to keep an eye out for Kate right?" I said, retreating from her clutches.

"She's just sleeping. I'm sure she can manage that by herself." She quipped back.

"If she burns the house down it's your fault." I said as I started to walk away, feeling appropriately indemnified.

Before I made it down the stairs, I heard her softly say "Thank you."

From the bottom of the stairs, I yelled up, "You're welcome."

I walked back into the house fifteen minutes later with a large bag of breakfast sandwiches and three coffees, thinking about how I maybe shouldn't have left it unlocked with only the two girls in the house, but I let myself forget it because it was morning already and a pretty nice neighborhood. I closed the front door behind me with a much louder than intended slam, and placed the food on the counter in the kitchen, before walking back upstairs to make Lily aware of my return.

When I was able to peer over the stairs and into the hall, I could see Lily's door at the end, open and showing her asleep on the bed again. 'She's surely an accountable one huh?' I thought to myself. I continued up and to her room where I knocked on the doorframe again and in a low tone, said "Lily, I'm back.". She wormed around a little before starting to get up.

I left her to her own devices as I walked into Kate's room. I prayed that she wouldn't mind me waking her up as I sauntered over to her bedside and just about whispered her name. Upon hearing my voice, a smile crept across her face and she stretched her arms, before opening her eyes with a flutter.

"Hi Humph." She said in a delicate tenor as she looked up at me. There was something deeply warming to know that the first thing she saw in the morning was me and that made her smile.

"Good morning. I got you guys McDonalds and Starbucks." I said, cheerily reciprocating her happiness and noticing the way she still looked beautiful when waking up and with, as far as I could tell, no makeup on.

"You didn't have to get us breakfast. I invited you over here."

"It doesn't matter if I have to, I wanted too." I said while I started to make my way out of the room and back downstairs.

"Wait up." She said as she practically jumped out of bed to follow me. I obliged her request and walked down with her at my side. At the kitchen table, we saw Lily voraciously eating without us, but I took it as a form of gratitude.

"Hi Lils." Kate greeted. Lily looked up from the death stare she had on her food to wave at Kate with a free hand.

She took a break from chewing to say "Humphrey got breakfast." and handed Kate her sandwiches.

"I know." She responded. I noticed that Lily had taken only her two sandwiches and Kate's from the bag, leaving in it another pair, and three hash brown patties.

"Lily, I got you a hash brown too, even though you didn't ask." I explained, grabbing my three items and doling out the other two patties. I un-wrapped my sandwich, broke the hash brown down the middle, and put one half inside. "That's how I like to eat my mcmuffins.". They both looked at me like I was from outer space. "What?"

"You're weird." Kate chastised me, although doing the same to her sandwiches. "Hey how'd you know that I like sausage egg mcmuffins?"

"A little birdie told me." I responded, pointedly glancing at Lily's indignant face.

"I'd say I'm at least a big birdie." Lily exclaimed, almost being able to sound irate.

"You're right, more of an ostrich really –Ow!" I said sarcastically, earning a not incredibly hard, but still far from soft punch in the arm from across the table.

"If anything, I'm a penguin." She declared.

"Okay, you're an emperor penguin." I stipulated in defeat, however, still managing to deserve another punch. "Ow!" I cried, rubbing my now tender shoulder. "What was that for?"

"Empress." She defended and it wasn't worth mentioning how that doesn't make sense because it's the species name.

"I don't think that would hold up in court." I said, not learning my lesson about sarcasm and still rubbing my sore arm. I stopped when I felt something else doing it for me with a smaller, electrifyingly warm hand. I looked to my right to see Kate looking at me and soothingly rubbing my bicep, or again, what passes for one. I smiled appreciatively at her, before turning back to Lily. "So this is how you treat me when I go and get you free food?". She just laughed my comment off.

"Why did you do that anyway?" Kate asked from beside me.

"Well, I'm the only guy here, I woke up early, and you're sick, so guy code pretty much demands it. Lily's just lucky I'm being nice." I said with a cheeky grin. Kate scoffed at my answer and retracted her arm, much to my dislike, and crossed it with her other.

The younger girl sardonically chimed in, "If you call waking me up before the earth exists on a Saturday morning being nice."

"And what does you being a guy have to do with it?" Kate asked in faux anger.

"Chivalry. I'm more commonly known as Sir Humphrey of the round table." I said with a voice full of fake bravado and gesturing to the geometry of the furniture on which we were eating. The two girls laughed at me, which is hard to complain about, considering the huge ass I was making of myself. I tried to go back to eating before my food got cold because cold egg sandwiches don't really strike my fancy.

The rest of the meal was spent in relative silence, excluding the sound of Lily sucking air through her straw into the coffee that she finished five minutes prior. I rubbed the temples of my head, very aware of the fact that my coffee had not yet given me enough energy to slap the cup from her hands.

I pleaded, "Lily, for God's sake, stop, please.". In response, she graciously continued her slurping, but at a much higher decibel. I found myself wishing more and more that stabbings weren't't illegal. Thankfully, I didn't have to resort to killing. Kate snatched the cup from Lily and collected our garbage that had accumulated on the table.

"Hey!" Lily exclaimed, crossing her arms and pouting, possibly ironically, but I believed it. "There was still some whipped cream on the bottom!". Kate didn't pay any attention to her outbursts and continued to the trash can, sneakily hidden in one of the cabinets under the countertop.

"I'm gonna watch some TV." She said as she turned and started to walk toward the kitchen door behind me. On her way past, she grabbed my head under my jaw and kissed me sweetly on the cheek, which turned a deep shade of crimson. "Thank you." She said and continued on her path, almost in a skip. I froze at the contact, staring widely at Lily as my cheek seared when her lips touched it and felt contrastingly numb afterward. I absentmindedly rubbed the skin with my fingers and looked at Lily questioningly.

"What?" she asked.

I mouthed back, 'What was that about?' and she shrugged her shoulders in response. I then glared an accusation at her.

"What now?" she asked, sounding annoyed.

"Why aren't you that grateful?" I joked.

"So that's the reason you did this. You were just pining for kisses." She said in thankfully a hushed tone, so that we couldn't be heard in the other room.

"No, but it wouldn't hurt if you took a break from beating me up to say thanks." I retorted, still not grasping the concept of what sarcasm gets me. "What are you doing?" I asked as she got up and started walking around the table toward me. She stared intently at me, and I suddenly empathized with gazelles under the watch of a lion. I tried to scramble out of my chair, but it was too far gone. I realized that I was way too late to make a difference as I was able to rise to a stand before being forced to the ground by the small girl and receiving a small peck on the opposite cheek from Kate's. "Blecc." I spat as I started to rub my face to get whatever she left, off of me. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and got up.

"Happy?" she asked bitterly.

"I was happier before-Oof!" I said, propping myself up on my elbow, and receiving a responsorial, soft kick in the ribs. I finally took the hint to shut my stupid, war-mongering mouth. 'That's it. I'm swearing off kissing. It brings nothing but trouble.' I thought to myself before quickly rescinding it at the thought of the difference between Kate's touch and Lily's. There was something magical and entrancing about the way that her soft, plump lips graced my skin that led me to only imagine the fireworks they would light if they met mine.

I rose from the ground in a bit of shame, because of the size of the person that put me there. I had to have had at least 70 pounds over her and she pushed me over like I was nothing. I trudged my way through the kitchen and into the living room, to join Kate on the couch. We sat in a bit of awkward silence as I'm sure we were both thinking about the last thing that happened between us, until I suggested that we continue playing The Last of Us. We spent most of our lazy day getting much further in our progress into the game and time seemed to slip away until I realized that it had become dark outside. Kate just died in the game and handed me the controller after the gruesome death scene, nuzzling into my arm like yesterday. I paused the game and turned to talk to her.

"So Kate, when are your parents coming back." I said, realizing that as far as I knew, they were about to come home any minute and beat the ever loving shit out of me for some suggestive reason.

"Tomorrow night." She replied. "Why? Do you want to go?" she asked somberly.

"N-No." I answered in my recent, awkward, stuttering fashion. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm never usually this…frazzled when it comes to talking. It's usually blunt, hollow conversations. "I-I just wanted to know if you wanted me to stay again." I said, avoiding eye contact again and awaiting a harsh rejection.

"Only if you want to." She replied, unsurely burrowing her head into my shoulder.

"Sure. I'm having fun." I said, feeling her rub against the soft cotton of my t-shirt and holding back the real amount of my excitement. Thinking about my t-shirt, I was suddenly hyperaware of the fact that I had been wearing it for a while and conscious of the possible grime accumulating and probably permeating through her nose. I shifted uncomfortably her.

"You smell nice." She blurted out suddenly and out of the blue. How could she be reading my mind like that? She must just be a really good liar.

"Really, because I haven't showered at all today?" I said, full of suspicion.

She laughed and said "Yeah, it's kinda manly and outdoorsy.". Yup, she is just a really good liar. No, she's not a liar, just impossibly nice and a mind reader.

"Thanks." I said honestly, albeit nervously. "Hey don't you need to take your meds again?"

"Oh yeah. I almost forgot." She said as she popped up from the couch and scampered off into the kitchen, where I could once again hear the pill bottle rattling. "So where did you sleep?" she asked, seeming randomly.

"Umm…I kinda slept in your room in the corner. Sorry I didn't ask first but you fell asleep on the couch and…and I carried you up to your room and…I was kinda too worried to leave you alone and you don't have a guest room anyway, so I sat on the floor."

"That's okay. Thanks for caring." She said fondly. It struck a chord of curiosity as to where she originally intended me to sleep but I thought she probably didn't really think it through.

She came back and we continued playing the game for a little while as the drugs started to kick in. I noticed that as she played, she was getting worse and worse with the shooting, the sneaking, and her reaction times. I looked at her face to see her with tired looking, half-closed eyes and her mouth hanging open. I looked back to the screen to see her walking in circles.

"Kate? You alright?" I asked earnestly.

"Em fin" she said in slowed, slurred speech.

"Tired?" I asked, chuckling a bit at how she was completely gone.

"Little bit." She responded as she shakily held up her index finger and thumb in a gesture to show a small amount, but then stared at it intensely. "Woah!" She said, sounding incredibly surprised and interested in her two digits. "I think dass the closest anyone's finger's ever been." she said and I stifled a loud laugh with a hand over my mouth. "Humphwey call the news." She commanded sleepily.

"Come on Kate. Let's get to bed, alright?" I insisted, standing to turn off the ps4 and the lights before, extending my hand to help her up.

"Alright." She said sloppily and grabbed my hand. I pulled her from the couch and wrapped her right arm over my shoulder and holding her under her left. As I walked her to the stairs, she started giggling profusely.

"What's so funny." I asked, hoping to hear more off her drug induced comedy gold.

"Nothing. Just you asking me to get to bed." She responded snickering into her palm while I did the lion's share of walking for the both of us.

"Oh." I said as my cheeks burned under my skin. At least she won't remember any of this. I hope. I walked her up the stairs, on which she tripped three separate times only to be caught by me, I helped her to her room, and closed the door behind me. I walked over to my corner and looked back at Kate, to see her stepping out of her pajama bottoms and already with her top off. "Oh sorry!" I almost squealed as I snapped a hand over my eyes. Sure I had seen her in her underwear only a couple of days ago but that was sober Kate and this sure as hell wasn't, so I wasn't going to take advantage. High-as-a-kite Kate didn't seem to notice the problem at all as I heard her climb into bed and under her comforter.

I sighed in relief, removed my hand from my face, and slid down the wall to sit on the floor. I looked back up to the bed and saw Kate staring back at me.

"What?" I asked.

"You can sleep in the bed if you want." She soffered, thankfully still sounding like a dumb drunk, otherwise, I might have obliged that.

"No Kate." I said sternly. It would not be very gentlemanly or responsible to get into bed with a girl whose head is on cloud nine and who I probably have feelings for. I knew that I had to treat the situation the same way I would if she had too much to drink.

"Why not?" she asked, sitting up on her bed and distractingly letting her blankets roll off of her.

"Because you're all drugged up." I said, causing her to pout at me like a baby. "Kate, I…" I started.

She interrupted me loudly, almost sadly asking "Don't you think I'm pretty?".

"Kate you're very pretty." I said with probably more honesty than was necessary and surprise at the outlandishness of the question.

"Then why won't you sleep with me?" she asked a little too loudly, rising from the bed and exposing the entirety of her half-naked self. So that's what she was implying by 'you can sleep in the bed'. That's not fair God! You can't make her that smart and funny and beautiful and nice and then make her vulnerable, naked, and horny. That's a really low blow.

"No Kate. You don't mean that." I said with pained words. "I-I…I should go." I said standing up and getting ready to leave. When I got onto my feet, she ran over and blocked my way to the door.

"Please don't leave." She practically begged. She started getting really worked up and almost like she was about to cry. I tried to calm her with a shy, tentative hand on her shoulder, as if I thought her skin might burn me.

"H-Hey, shh. It's okay, don't cry." I comforted. She lunged forward and brought her arms around me. I heard her sharp intakes of air and felt inordinately guilty as I held my arms up in the air like I was proving myself unarmed. She seemed to sob a little harder. It took an incredible degree of will power to not cry myself, as wimpy as that sounds, so in an attempt to cease her balling, I brought my arms around her back, placed high and platonically. She brought one of her hands from my back to hers, and grabbed my arm to move it lower. Despite the internal war it caused me, I was able to stop my hands at her waist, refusing to go lower. It felt really wrong and forced but at the same time her skin was so soft and warm and I could feel the ridges of her hips in my palm.

She was calming down and everything seemed like it might be okay and that I could just slip out of the room. Suddenly, she moved her hand to my chest and started to trace a line down it with her finger. No matter how tantalizing and attractive the offer was, I had to stop this before it got any worse. I backed away from her and she started to sniffle a little. Every option seemed like the worst one because I was caught between making her cry and absolutely taking advantage of her.

"Please don't go." She pleaded sadly once more. It was so hard to resist and my eyes searched the room frantically for an answer. I sighed and let out my response.

"I'll stay but I can't sleep with you." I said quietly, hating how the last words came out of my mouth, but knowing that I had to be resolute in them.

"Okay." she finally agreed, seemingly regretfully. So many things were wrong about staying but I couldn't bare thinking about two things: that I would be making her cry, and that I left her when she did definitely need me. I couldn't just let her be this drugged up and crazy and then add to that being upset and then just go. I sat back down in my now lonelier corner and pulled out my phone to look at the messages I'd received since it was on silent.

From Charlie I got two from last night, one saying, "Couldn't get enough in one night?" and the other saying "Don't ignore my sarcasm. It makes it not worth it."

From Paul I got one, saying "Charlie told me where you are. I trust you, just be responsible.". That had too many implications to bear thinking about.

I started a new message to him. "I need to stay at Kate's one more night. Her parents won't be home until late tomorrow and I'm worried about her and these drugs. Sorry.". I waited for the response this time.

"Like I said, be responsible." He said, sounding a little worried himself.

"I am Dad." I texted back, and re-silenced my phone. I put it in my pocket and drifted off to sleep.

(Time skip: 7:00 a.m.)

I woke up again to the alarm on my phone. Kate didn't move, so I got up quickly and went downstairs. I put my shoes on and practically ran out of the door, into my car. I was going to just go home but I decided that since I was bailing on Kate and Lily like this, the least that I could do is get them breakfast again. I came back to their house with the food in tow and sneakily putting the bag of breakfast sandwiches and hash browns on the counter and the coffee in the fridge. The receipt for the food was in the bag so I removed it and placed it on the table, pulling out a trusty pen from my pocket. On the back of the paper, I wrote:

 _Sorry Kate but I have to go. I got you and Lily breakfast and there is coffee in the fridge. This was really nice and I had a good time. Thanks for having me over. :)_

 _-Signed Humphrey._

After leaving the note, I got out as fast and silently as I could and drove back to my house. I tiredly stumbled into the house at around 7:30 and was met by none other than I smiling Charlie on the living room sofa, watching Sunday morning cartoons.

"Aww shit." I muttered under my breath, gazing at her too excited face. Her mouth opened as if she was going to say something but I stopped her. "I don't want to hear it." I grumbled out grouchily as I walked past her into the kitchen, where I saw Paul cooking. "Hi." I said, devoid of any feeling. Too much had happened and I had gotten too little sleep thinking about it.

"Hey Humphrey." He said with a smile. I knew what he was going to try and ask but I almost wished he wouldn't beat around the bush as much as he was going to. "So how'd it go." He asked, almost nervously anticipating the answer.

From the other room, Charlie yelled, "Nothing happened. He'd be in a better mood.". I could hear her trying to contain a cackle, but failing miserably.

"Thanks Charlie." I yelled back angrily. I looked back to Paul and his quizzical face. "What she said." I admitted, feeling all new levels of embarrassment. "She was on drugs anyway. It wouldn't be right."

"I'm proud of you." He said in a very fatherly tone.

"I'm tired of me. I'm gonna sleep some more." I said before heading up to my room.

(Time skip: Monday morning)

Normal day, normal routine. I walked to first period Calculus with Kate, who seemed to be a little less excited than usual and possibly avoiding looking at me. In Calculus, we got a spiel about how there was going to be a test on Wednesday before we were told to basically do whatever. I let out a long, exhausted sigh and looked over to an atypically quiet Kate. She was already looking at me and averted her eyes to her desk. She was acting very strangely.

"What's up with you today?" I asked, both with genuine concern and wanting to just start a conversation.

"Umm…" she began. There was a long pause before I waved her to continue with my hand. "Lily told me…some things she heard…from a couple of nights ago." She said nervously.

"I don't think I like where this going." I said with a laugh, attempting to provide some comic relief and failing miserably. "What did she tell you?" I asked squeamishly.

In a whisper she said, "I think you would know more.". I could tell that she didn't quite have the full picture, so it'd only be fair to clue her in.

"You don't remember?" I asked, trying to complete my understanding.

"Not really. I kinda have this feeling like I should be embarrassed but I'm not sure why."

"Umm…yeah. That's kinda appropriate." I said before starting to shyly recount everything that happened, up to and including the part where she propositioned me.

"Oh God." She mumbled with her head in her hands. "Did…did we…did anything happen?" she asked, trying to break through her shame to get to the question.

"Umm, no. I turned you down but you were pretty upset when I said that I should leave, so I stayed, but in the corner. It was really hard to say no to you when you were sort of crying."

"Oh, thank God." She sighed, seeming very relieved, although maybe damaging my ego slightly. "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean like that…it's…I mean, we're not even dating." She said, with a nervous chuckle and returning her eyes to her desk.

"No it's ok. You're totally right, plus you were high anyway and that's not how I'd want it." I said. There was an awkward silence following what I just unintentionally let slip. I basically told her that I wanted to have sex with her. Why can't I ever shut my mouth when it's good for me? She did seem like she was suggesting that we start dating but I bet I'm reading the signals way wrong. There's no way that would happen. Eventually I worked up enough courage to ask "We're okay right?"

"Yeah, definitely." She responded, the first happy words to come from her today. We were finally able to return to our lighthearted banter for the rest of the day, until lunch when I was heatedly staring daggers at Lily from across the table. The only other notable thing that happened was I caught Garth looking over at Kate a couple of times throughout the day. I shrugged it off as nothing because I stare at stuff meaninglessly all of the time.

The final period ended and I told Kate that I'd drive her and her sister home after I found Charlie, who I hadn't seen since that morning. Kate said that she'd wait at our lockers for me. Eventually, I got to Charlie outside, who so casually forgot to tell me that she was hanging out with friends today, and not coming home with me. She's really, really, irresponsible.

I walked back inside and down the hallway that housed my locker. Approximately where it would be, I saw a huddle of guys, leaning up against the wall. I didn't think anything of it and continued to scan for Kate, until I saw the creamy mid-thigh and below of clearly a girl, coming from under a seemingly familiar white skirt that was barely visible between the crowd of guys around her.

"Kate?" I called down the hallway as I approached. When my voice rang out, a guy whose back was to me spun around and revealed his identity, Garth. From behind him ran a very flushed and upset looking Kate, who came to me and cowered behind my right arm, clinging to it. "Are you alright?" I asked, calmingly addressing her before the problem in front of me. She nodded hurriedly and was evidently frightened. I looked back up to see the mess of three guys in front of me, Garth in the middle, Candu on his right, and that nameless asshole on his left. "What's going on here?" I asked, trying to remain level-headed.

"Listen Wilson, none of your business. Kate was just telling me how much she wanted to go out with me this weekend." He answered, stepping closer than I would have like to me. He had a threating way of carrying himself and it was not very compelling. As he stepped a little closer, I slowly tucked my arm and the girl clinging to it behind my back a little bit more. Garth began again, "So as I was saying, I was going to ask you out on Friday, but you were absent. I could help you get the homework. There are some people around that absolutely love to give me their answers for some reason.". The more words that came out, the impossibly more infuriating he seemed. "I was thinking, maybe you could come over and we get some pizza and a movie. I have a Jacuzzi y'know and…" he rambled on, slowly inching towards us, until I cut in.

"Garth I think she changed her mind." I said, attempting to be tactful and reasonable, but still cautiously keeping Kate behind me. Our grip had changed so that I held onto one of her arms by the wrist, trying to be gentle but inadvertently tensing around it more than I wanted to, while her other still draped around my forearm.

"What? Like you know her so well." he almost growled.

"Garth, just leave it alone." I tried, again wanting to be calm.

"I don't think I want to." he said, still pushing closer toward us. I started to back away slowly as my body prepared itself to either run out of there as fast as possible or start swinging. He kept following as he edged to within four feet of us. I stared him in the eyes intently, trying to judge what would happen next. Kate seemed to be trembling behind me and I just held onto her tighter. He noticed how adamant I was about this and decided to change tactics. "Maybe I will actually." he said, which sounded like a relief until it very obviously wasn't. "Yeah, maybe I'll hit up her freshman sister." he almost boasted.

"Don't bring her into this." I asserted, feeling every muscle in my body contract and stiffen.

In my ear, I heard a soft, frightened voice say "Humphrey let's just go."

I let out a calming breath and said "You're right, let's go.". I turned around, ushering Kate away and managing to keep myself between her and Garth, but I was only able to take one step before I heard something very escalating said behind me.

"Or maybe I'll give Charlie a late night call." He said. I stopped in my tracks and peered over my shoulder to see Garth grinning like he'd accomplished something, a few feet ahead of his buddies who looked like they would much rather not be there. That meant they probably wouldn't want to fight over this.

"Humphrey." Kate called and I thought about it once more. I really didn't want this to go any further, just move on and ignore them for the rest of high school, but I was sorely at my limit. He was prodding a leaking dam, but I just barely had enough integrity to maintain myself. I tried to calm myself down once more and I looked at Kate, standing in front of me, shaking and scared. She looked like she really wanted to just walk away from this. I was being selfish, making this about me. I almost got to take another step forward.

"Your bitch ass won't do anything." Garth scoffed. "Just kill yourself." he spat irritatingly and with a laugh. That was a fairly commonly used remark around assholes who don't know any better, but right now it was directed at me and it meant something much, much more. And suddenly, it seems all extraordinarily worth it. The dam broke and the torrents broke loose.

I didn't even think about the fact that I lunged at him, practically snarling and bringing him to the ground. I didn't think about the first, very satisfying, smacking sound of a fist connecting with his jaw. I also didn't think about the second, third, forth, or fifth time I heard the same, still satisfying, in fact increasingly so, sound of my knuckles meeting his face. I could have sworn that no other sound could have been heard, although there was some barely audible yelling in the background and possibly some fingers pulling at my shoulders. That seemed unlikely considering how I was able to stay on the bleeding mass of bulbous flesh below me and continue my ferocious barrage.

Something did break the near silence that I heard. It was a shrill, feminine scream and it made everything else go out of focus.

"HUMPHREY!" I heard being called. I looked behind me to see the weakly standing girl who looked as if she were about to cry again. I got up and walked with Kate away from the scene, not looking back at the havoc which I had wreaked. We walked outside to the parking lot and Kate asked, "Lily left without us. Do you want me drive?".

Through uneven breaths, I said "No". We entered the car and as I put my hands on the steering wheel, I noticed the set of four split knuckles on my right hand and the blood splattered across the back of the other. I drove off, trying to keep my anxious lead foot under control. I looked to the passenger beside me and took note of the way she abnormally straightened her left side and looked as though she was grimacing. We arrived at the house and I asked, gesturing to my knuckles, "Can I get some paper towels?". She nodded but winced as she leaned over to undo her seat belt. That was also dually noted.

She led me into the house and into the kitchen. She grabbed a couple of squares from the roll of paper towels and I held out my knuckles as she wiped the blood from them. It hurt, but not enough to make me react with all of the adrenaline still in me. When she bent over to throw the now soiled cloth into the garbage, she recoiled sharply and looked like she was going to scream, but trying not to. I bent down to throw the trash away for her, before looking at her sternly.

"What happened?" I asked, pointing a finger at her left side ribs.

"Umm…nothing. I just fell down the stairs on the way to my locker." She very blatantly lied. I stared at her accusingly.

"Show me." I commanded more than asked, though I was sure that I didn't want to see it. It was more callously than I intended, but she was hiding something and I needed to get a point across.

"Humphrey, I-I…" she started.

"Kate." I interrupted seriously. She slowly grabbed at the base of her shirt and timidly raised it up to where I could see the very bottom of the cups of her bra, though that was very far from important at the moment. I stopped her hand from going any further up when I saw, on her left side, a rather large bruise forming with five, somewhat defined branches sticking from a central circle. It was definitely not from falling down the stairs and more than likely from a too forceful hand. I breathed out slowly and measuredly, before allowing her to drop her shirt. "I'm gonna kill him." I coarsely said, before searching around the room for a ziploc bag, and upon finding it, filling it with ice and wrapping it in a paper towel. I placed it gently on her side and put her hand over it to keep it there.

"No you're not." She said, responding to my previous outburst.

"Yes I am." I said, full of conviction. She stared back at me with soft, forgiving, and convincing eyes that told me to wait and think this out.

"You've done enough. You'll be lucky to not get suspended already."

"I'm sorry." I said, glumly.

"For what?" she asked earnestly.

"I should have been there sooner and it wouldn't have happened if…" I frantically said.

"Humphrey it is so far from your fault, just don't go making this worse than it already is."

"I-I…I'm going to do something. Maybe I can come up with an idea that doesn't involve homicide but it will take a while." I said moving towards the door.

"Okay, and thank you." She said, moving with me to the door frame. I made myself extra sure that I saw Lily's backpack by the door, just to make sure nothing else happened.

"Anytime." I said, stepping out of the door and closing it behind me. I walked to my car, sat down inside, and let out another deep breath. Homicide still sounded good to me.

 **A/N: Please review, especially if you're pointing out a grammatical mistake because I wanted to get this posted tonight and I couldn't preview all of it and still do that. Special thanks to Squid84 and all my reviewers, but especially him tonight because he really helped me with this chapter, even suggesting part of the Garth scene.**

 **Thanks a bunch,**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	8. Outnumbered and Outclassed

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 8 _Outnumbered and Outclassed_

 **A/N: Hey guys, got another chapter for you. It's not as long as the last but still a good size. You guys seemed to really like fighting Humphrey and that's great because I like him to. He's decisive and acts deliberately. If you guys are really following this story, there are a couple announcements at the bottom. Enjoy. :)**

 **Fav Review:**

" **The best work I have seen yet. You know theres an old saying about dont poke the bear with a stick and i think Garth just found out why. But he hasnt merely poked the bear, he has smashed its foot with a ball bat... lol Garth would know who i am and what Im about after i got done with him if i was Humphrey. Then again if i was Kate, he would be dickless right now. Now it seems as if Humphrey is going to be in a world of trouble at school, totally worth it if i say so myself. So lets see... Kate pretty much told Humphrey she likes him, he pretty much told her he would plow her like a field if given the opportunity and the right situation and he beat up Garth... I Love it. Cant wait to see how the next chapter plays out :)"-Squid84**

(Humphrey's POV)

The engine of my car roared back to life and growled as it pulled out of the driveway of Kate's suburban abode. Blood started to streak from my knuckles again as I gripped the black leather steering wheel too tightly, trying to purge the violent thoughts from my head. The idea of disemboweling Garth with a dull, rusty cooking spoon and hanging him by his entrails was oddly persistent, but it eventually subsided as well. I knew I couldn't actually go through with any of my brutal plans of action because above all else, Kate looked like she just wanted this to be over, swept under the rug and forgotten. Even worse, she looked like she was about to vomit when she saw me…on him.

Something broke in me when I saw her, screaming my name on the verge of tears and looking honestly fearful at the savage that was just assaulting another guy. That sunk in finally; I assaulted a man. It wasn't quite in cold blood, in fact in very, very heated blood, metaphorically boiling even, but it is still a hard fact to accept. I have never been quite violent, especially not to the point of a possible felony, but I just suddenly snapped and was a completely different guy. That didn't even sound like me talking to Kate through clenched teeth and in a seething rage. At least I took care of her first, before running out of the house with murder on the mind. I thought about how I maybe should have gotten some ibuprofen for her while I was there, but if I went back she'd probably be tired of pain killers by now.

I played through all of the possible repercussions for what I did and none of them seemed good, but all of them likely. There was something about the way I handled everything with Kate that seemed to cross the boundary out of generic kindness. It awoke some type of primal protective instincts that burned inside of me and collectively told me that I made the right moves. They assured me that it was a completely logical reaction and that anyone would agree to that, even if I didn't

When I stepped through the front door, I was welcomed by the sound of thunderous footsteps coming down the stairs at such an energetic pace that could only mean my sister. I set my bag down and braced myself for what I knew was coming next. When Charlie finally made it to the first floor, she ran up to me and did her best to collapse my chest cavity with her arms.

"Oh my god I heard what happened! Are you alright?" she asked in about a frantic quarter of a second. I awkwardly held my hand in the air to avoid staining her clothes with my blood.

"I thought you were at your friend's house." I pointed out, aggravated by more than just her death grip, but choosing to focus on that. Ultimately, I just pushed her off with my left hand and she glared back an offended look, so I returned one that expressed the same amount of scorn.

"I came here as soon as I found out. Sorry I gave a shit. Where were you?" she yelled back, now decidedly peeved, a welcome change from the too extensive worrying that preceded it.

"I drove Kate home." I defended also angrily. It really seemed more of a cover for not wanting to have this conversation. I got a little angrier when I realized how much I insisted on psychoanalyzing myself.

"Is she okay?" she asked in a little more normal of a tone. I would have rather dealt with pissed off Charlie, because it made it seem like my emotions were less misappropriated. Her calm disposition made this seem so uncomfortable. It made it clear that I was in the wrong for yelling. So I subconsciously had to re-escalate it.

"I'm not telling you jack shit, especially when you're getting information from one of the other four people that were there." I shouted, storming past her and into the kitchen. All of the deep voiced, serious talking had left my throat hoarse. Reaching into the fridge for a bottle of water, I shouted "And who told you anyway?". I resisted the urge to jump when I turned around to see a red faced, fuming girl, who somehow managed to sneak into the room behind me. That reaction definitely would have ruined the angry façade.

"You don't even trust me enough to tell me if you're alright and you want to get mad at me?!" she yelled, gesturing to the center of her chest with a slender finger, digging into the fabric of her dark blue hoodie. "Sometimes you're a real asshole Humphrey." She accused me.

All that I could do was set the water on the counter and rub my forehead while I tried to make sense of the situation unfolding in front of me. Along with everything else, I didn't need to be arguing with a sister who evidently just cared too much. She must have noticed my bleeding hand as it soothed my headache because her face faltered and I swore that it stung under her gaze.

"I'm fine. It was just a fight afterschool." I said, presenting my palm at my side instead of the distracting wounds. The unintentional guilt trip that she was giving me was a bit too much at the time.

"And Kate?" she asked grimly. I wasn't sure that I wanted to answer that. Garth deserves to have everything that happened betray him, but I recalled Kate's reluctance at even telling me. I didn't want her to be embarrassed or upset if word got out.

"She's ok. A little shaken up, but she'll be fine." I half-answered grudgingly. Every fiber in my body wanted to believe that Charlie would tell anyone and everyone who could resist hitting her long enough to hear, but her frankness and solemn manner deflected the doubt. I did need to know what was being said, though. "How much did you hear?" I asked to both satiate my curiosity and figure out how much longer I would need to do this.

"I heard some big junior, namely you, got into a fist fight over some blonde, and I assumed Kate." She said, sounding again like an accusation or possibly a criminal interrogation. Her description of the event was less than flattering, but not worth the correction. This won't be good for my reputation, sounding like some douchey, macho, tough guy, beating people up because they were looking at my girl the wrong way, though. I laughed a little to myself as I realized that I just referenced Kate as 'my girl'. It wasn't a terribly appalling description of her to my ears.

I saw Charlie glancing again at my hand, pointedly positioned to hide the tops from view. "What does the other guy look like?" she asked. I released a defeated sigh and turned my wrist toward her, before walking over to the sink to properly wash the cuts. She twisted her face at the sight.

"Probably bruised, definitely bloody." I said as I remembered how the sound of my fist impacting on flesh grew increasingly wet. Outside of the hyped up, brawling mode of thought that I had earlier, the noise was not nearly as appealing and almost gut wrenching. It was still hard to believe that I made that happen and with a now much less violence-fogged mind, I really noticed the twinges of pain shooting from my hand and up through my right arm as the cold water coursed over the blood soaked, torn skin.

"Did you get hit?" she asked, walking over to hang off of my shoulders annoyingly, but she reconciled it enough by rubbing them slightly.

"I don't think so. His face really did a number on my hand though." I joked. Charlie laughed with me for a relaxing in minute, before being overcome with severity again.

"Are you going to tell me what he did?" she asked with a grave tone.

"He was the biggest guy in the yard and I had to send a message." I answered, ripping off every prison move I'd ever seen. I thought it was pretty funny but apparently she wasn't amused. She stared at me with scowling eyes, so I sighed, disappointed that I had to give up on playing today's events off as a joke.

"He was being a little rough with Kate and then he said some things." I admitted, trying to get away with being as vague as possible. My face took the appearance of a cherry as I felt petty about my reasoning. I turned off the water in the sink and dried my hands on a towel. I looked up at Charlie through glassy eyes and with a face that managed to hold back a quiver in my lip. She dropped her vision to the floor and looked like her eyes were far from dry as well.

"About me?" she asked like it was some harrowing actuality.

"A little." I stipulated honestly. I wasn't exactly downplaying it, but it wasn't the sole cause. It brought me right to the edge of a vicious cliff, waiting for the slightest push to get me over. I wrapped an exhausted arm around her shoulder and brought her close to me. She latched her arms together behind my back and I grazed my lips over the top of her head as I felt my t-shirt becoming a little wet. "I love you." I whispered like a tender secret.

After all of the policing, nagging, and being an absolute nuisance, she is my only biological family, so I have to look out for her and it definitely seems like she feels the same way. That day, I set a precedence that no one talks about her the way I heard, not that anyone would think it wise to do that with her fucking brother at the same school, or worse yet, to his face. I mean, there are levels of stupid, and then there is a basement.

She took a moment to even out her breaths before replying "I love you too.". In a rather perplexing next move, she punched me really hard in the left arm, unprovoked. "But don't you ever fight for me again." She ordered commandingly.

"Ow!" I exclaimed in not quite as angry a voice as was probably appropriate. "You don't make a very convincing argument. And wasn't there enough punching today already?" I joked, already trying to make light of the conversation.

"That's not funny." She declared grouchily as she turned and stormed away.

"Too soon?" I asked, following her up out of the room and receiving nothing but something sounding like an angry growl. "Aww come on. Would it at least have been funny if you weren't mad at me? I thought it was pretty good." I prodded, on her heels until we reached her bedroom, where she pushed me back with a hand on my face and slammed the door in front of me.

A few hours and copious amounts of homework later, I got a text from Kate:

K: "So did you tell your Dad?"

H: "No. You?"

K: "No. They'd be really mad if they saw anything.". That's probably true. If my daughter got hit by some guy at her school, I'd surely press charges.

H: "How's the bruise?"

K: "It's ok. Kinda hurts but I'll manage."

H: "OK. You coming to school?"

K: "I think so. You won't do anything stupid will you?". Though it sounded like an insult, I took that as an expression of concern.

H: "Do I ever?"

I went to sleep worrying about what would come in the next few days. I envisioned everything from another fight to getting expelled to spending the next two years in jail. Even more worrying is what would happen to Kate. She's new, there's already rumors spreading, and she doesn't need any of this. I just hope people don't say anything bad about her. It wasn't anyone's fault but mine.

(Time skip: First period)

(Kate's POV)

I spent a lot of the class thinking about how Isaac Newton invented calculus and realized how much I wished apples were a lot harder and heavier. What an ass, making kids do this. We were reviewing the lessons for our first test tomorrow and I felt like someone was putting sandpaper to my brain. It was horrible, listening to the lazy kids who haven't done any of the work yet ask the most pointless and obvious questions over and over again.

Admittedly, I was just a little grumpy because I had to sit up ridiculously straight in order to avoid the sharp, stabbing sensation in my side. Humphrey seemed really worried when he saw it, but it's not like it was a big deal. I get bruises all of the time, so what? It was kinda nice though, having him care that much and being so attentive, not that I'd ever tell him that. I'd never hear the end of it and he's sarcastic enough as it is, so I didn't need to go around inflating his head.

Speaking of the Devil, Humphrey was asleep in his desk next to mine, missing the review lesson. I nudged him awake. He whined and stretched his arm, before looking at me in an all too warming way. Staring at him and smiling too happily at really nothing, I lost my train of thought entirely.

"What?" he groaned sleepily.

"Huh? Oh." I said, shaking my head out of its daze and pointing him towards the front of the room.

"Pfft." He scoffed as he propped a hand up to support his apparently very heavy skull. I have no idea how he can be so tired after all the coffee he says he drinks. It's kinda cute in the same way a puppy is always too sleepy to do anything. This is a wildly different Humphrey from the coarse, steely one I saw yesterday.

He flicked his head up in a way that gestured behind me, so I turned around to see an empty seat to which Garth was assigned. I wondered how bad he actually got hit, not for that asshole's sake, but for Humphrey's. This could really turn into a big mess for him. I got a little lost in thought staring at the chair, but I came back to reality when I heard Ms. Brown tell us to do whatever for the last ten minutes of the period.

I leaned over to Humphrey and asked "So why didn't you tell your Dad?". He sat up to actually have a conversation and groaned some more throughout the motion.

"I don't want to unless I have to." he answered plainly, despite his usual way of blabbering on a little. He must've been really tired.

"What's up? Why so sleepy?" I inquired. His slow talking and half closed eyes were making me want a nap too.

"Couldn't sleep. I was a little worried.". He was doing a good job of hiding it, because all I saw was a blank, almost comatose glower being expressed.

"About what?" I asked, hoping he would say a test or his sister or anything other than what I knew he was going to.

He looked like he was thinking about how much to tell me before he responded. "You." he mumbled lazily. My stomach sank, all of the warmth that I felt being replaced with goosebumps and I began to understand why he is keeping that one secret from me, although the curiosity kills me. It's remarkably unpleasant to receive what feels like misplaced concern from a friend who should only think of you as fun. "And Garth," he continued, "but mostly you."

"Why?" I said, thinking of how wrong seriousness is on Humphrey. It's like a bark coming out of a cat or oil on water's surface, mismatched irreconcilably.

"I didn't want you to have a hard time. People are already talking…and I don't care, but I thought you might actually want to meet people here." He said with his emotionless, wearily droopy look.

"What's being said?" I asked in order to assess the damage. He was right; I do want to actually have some new people to talk to, despite how childish obsessing over rumors is.

"All Charlie said she heard was that me and another junior got into a fight over a girl." He mumbled contritely and fixating on my backpack like it insulted him. There was some feministic urge to fight that description but I'm sure Humphrey wasn't championing the portrayal anyway. He did look like he could use some cheering up though.

"Great. A week in and I'm already pinned as a damsel in distress." I clowned.

Humphrey gave me a dirty look and said "You can't be the pretty one and the funny one.". My cheeks burned and I looked away, hiding a cheeky grin. He must love torturing me with his subtle compliments, said in passing. As much as I'd like to believe it was part of a nefarious plan to drive me insane, I knew that he is just a too nice guy; like…painfully nice. So nice that he makes me want to glare at the other guys around me and say 'Why aren't you like that?'.

The room was filled with the ear shattering cry of the bell. Humphrey got up and grabbed my bag again. It's a really nice gesture, but sometimes I feel bad about it, like I'm taking advantage of him.

"You really don't have to do that." I offered guiltily. He flashed a toothy grin, in his oddly signature way.

"It's my way of saying sorry for the fight." he said, but I knew he would be doing it anyway.

"Well if you do this every time you mess up, I'll start blaming you for more." I jested.

"Like what?"

"Like how it's weird to go in my pool now.". He blushed in a way that might as well have been him waving a white flag, and I smirked victoriously.

(Time skip: Fifth period)

"Psst." The girl who sat next to me in drama class whispered.

"What?" I asked in a hushed tone as to not interrupt the lecture on Shakespeare we were receiving.

"Are you Kate?" she requested. It seemed pretty suspect, considering how Humphrey said people were talking about what happened, but she seemed very friendly.

"Uh…yeah. Why?". She leaned in further, like she was going to tell me a secret. I warily leaned in as well, realized it was a mistake, and sat back up, surreptitiously clutching my side.

"Is it true two guys got into fight over you?" she said, even more quiet. There it was, the thing I was dreading her asking. She didn't look very threatening and talked tentatively. If it came down to it I could take her, but for now, she asked me a question and I had to correct her misinformation.

"Sorta. It wasn't really over me, but I was there and it started off about me." I explained in my defense. It wasn't very appealing to be talked about like a wrestling championship belt.

"Why?" she inquired further.

"Why do you want to know?" I snapped more rudely than I meant, but not rudely enough to warrant apologizing.

"It's the most interesting thing to happen so far this week and you seemed too nice." She replied with a sort of happy go luck smile that she must have had on since she got to school. That sounds nice, but exhausting.

"Ms. Williams?" a loud, assertive voice called. I shot up to attention.

"Yes ma'am?" I answered to the teacher politely, seeing as I could have gotten yelled at.

"Do you have a question?" she asked condescendingly. There was no way that she actually thought I had a question about what she was talking about. She bored half of the class to sleep, and drove the other half to try and get away with playing games on their phones.

"No ma'am" I replied, promptly quieting myself and letting her return to the mind-numbing lesson. "I'll talk to you at lunch." I whispered as silently as possible to the girl next to me. She nodded in affirmation.

At the end of class, I stood up with my bag and waited as patiently as I could for her. She seemed like every motion was so methodical and calculated that moving with any more speed would cause her to over shoot slightly and make it not worth the effort.

"So what's your name?" I asked trying to occupy myself in the meantime.

"Samantha but usually people either call me Sweets or Sam." She informed. The options were kinda limited, and what kind of name is Sweets anyway? Almost sounds like a stripper name, but that would be a little crass to say out loud. Plus, she seemed to be genuinely nice and cheerful.

"Sweets?" I repeated, just to make sure that I heard right.

"I know; it's bad. It's a middle school nickname that kinda stuck." She confessed half-heartedly. I figured I'd be nice too and call her by the better of the two.

"Sam's nice."

"Thank you." She said, and it looked honest too; not a 'I'm saying this because I have to' thank you. "Hey can my sister sit at your table too? It's okay if you say no." she requested like it might offend me. Maybe she was afraid that I would sick Humphrey on her like a German Shepherd.

"Yeah that's fine. I usually sit with a friend, his sister, and mine anyway.". Humphrey wouldn't mind that, at least I think. He doesn't really talk do anyone besides me, Charlie, and Lily, but he gets along with most people. 'Most people' would probably have to exclude football players who are a little too forward. As if it was listening to my thoughts, my bruise started to act up again to remind me of its presence. I wished it would fade soon but thankfully it wasn't noticeable.

" _His_ sister?" Sam echoed. I nodded in an over-exaggerated way that almost said 'Are you stupid?'. "What's his name?" she answered after scowling at my sarcasm.

"Humphrey Wilson. You know him?"

"No. Must be a quiet kid." She answered on a tone unbothered by my snootiness. It would have been nice to meet a new friend of his.

"Yeah, a little.". He didn't used to be, but now I guess he is quiet. He has to be hiding something dark and from what I saw yesterday, probably an underground fighting ring. I could just imagine him, sweaty and shirtless, telling me the rules of fight club. That's a nice dream, but it's a little more than unrealistic. He's tall but not the biggest guy out there. If anything, he's a bit on the skinny side and that works well enough for me.

"So is he one of the guys from the fight?" she blurted nonchalantly. She made it seem like just a normal Monday occurrence, and I wasn't sure if I should be if I should have been scared of her or the school.

"Umm…yeah, actually." I said, reorienting my train of thought, which felt like it was doing loop-de-loops.

"Ooooh!" she squealed mockingly. I held my hand out cynically. "So he's the good guy?". What? Is my life a comic strip? She's definitely a quirky girl.

"If that's what you'd call it, sure." I affirmed, thinking about what my life had become in the last 45 minutes.

We walked to the cafeteria and on the way picked up Sam's sister, Candice, known as Candy (another stripper name but at least that one made sense). We made it to our table which seated us three, Lily, Charlie, and a very surprised looking Humphrey.

(Humphrey's POV)

Kate sat next to me at the lunch table, as per norm, but she brought with her a couple of extra faces. I glowered at her when she sat down and continued it for the few seconds it took for her to notice.

"Who do you think you are bringing strange women to my table?" I barked, testing her sense of humor. I don't think I'll ever get her to believe it for a moment if I can't help smiling as soon as I say a line. She smirked all too knowingly while she called my bluff with her eyes.

"Humphrey, this is Sam and her sister Candy." She announced, gesturing to a redheaded girl with an even spread of freckles across her cheekbones to her right, and a slightly less pigmented girl with closer to brown hair, sitting across from the first, respectively.

"Or Sweets." The redhead presented coyly. I mimed tipping my hat formally.

"I hope you guys don't mind that I invited them." Kate added, although I don't know how much she really cared if I minded or not. I shook my head to show my acceptance and looked at Charlie and Lily across from me to gauge their approval. Neither of them made objections, but Lily was unabashedly staring at my right hand, laid carelessly on the table, but more specifically, the still open wounds on each of my bruised knuckles. I slid my hand onto my lap to avoid her scrutiny.

"No, put it back." She ordered and I submitted, reservedly. "That's so cool."

"It's cool that I can't wear gloves for a while?" I asked sarcastically.

"No." she replied indignantly. "It's cool that you just beat the shit out of some guy." She enlightened me, oh so eloquently. The other four girls turned to me with questioning looks.

"I didn't _just_ beat the shit out of _some_ guy. He did some unsavory things, I lost my temper, and people got hurt. It's serious stuff." I defended earnestly. She has some nerve sometimes. I'm convinced that she is only ever invested in a conversation to get a rise out of me.

"What did he say?" Candy asked, seemingly unaware of how the topic was wearing on me. It didn't really merit a full, explicit answer.

"He implied some ungentlemanly things. I don't really want to go into it." I blankly answered, glancing at Kate and Charlie to see their reactions. They both looked too grim and respectful, the last one way out of place on Charlie.

"The way I heard it made it sound like you were dueling to win the favor of the blonde, transferred maiden." Candy stated in a mockingly dramatic tone. I laughed at the mental image of two sixteenth century men, fighting it out in the street.

"Yeah, we crossed swords at sundown." I joked, shortly after, realizing how that joke could possibly be misconstrued. Charlie pounced on the opportunity too quick for me to cover it up.

"Woah. We don't need to hear about your bedroom activities." She said with a proud smirk.

I kicked her leg under the table and only half-jokingly challenged "Do you want to fight too?".

"I'd lay you out in a second." She boasted, throwing her wavy, chestnut hair over her shoulder casually.

Lily interrupted "I heard you broke his jaw because he was mouthing off.".

"Not quite but closer." I corrected.

Sam chimed in "I heard you beat him up because you found out that he was really a Montague.". The rest of the group looked at her before erupting in laughter.

"Were you actually listening to that crap in drama?" Kate asked, like someone had suggested that the Sun rotated around the Earth.

"Yeah that's what the class is for." the ginger snarked. "And come on, it's Romeo and Juliet."

"More like Romeo and Julie's shit." Kate retorted.

I shook my head, signaling 'You could do better.' and sardonically saying "Classy."

She scoffed and said "Classier than your bar-fighting ass."

"Yeah whatever." I deadpanned and returned to my food. I caught a few glances from the others girls at the table. Eventually, they started whispering unintelligibly to each other, which unleashed a wave of giggles. I hadn't felt particularly nervous until then, but suddenly I got a snaking feeling that I was outnumbered and extremely out of my element. I decided to play it cool and just focus on eating my food, or the disgusting, bulging gruel that they called food here. Eventually I had to stop thinking about the food so that I could actually swallow some, and I hatched the idea that Kate only brought these two girls to make fun of me in front of more than just my sister and Lily. That called for revenge.

 **A/N: So what did you think? Feedback is dearly appreciated. Speaking of which, a couple of you have been p.m.'ing me your reviews (Which I'm really grateful for) but I'd ask that you would actually send them as reviews, just so their easier to remember to look at for the favorite review section. Also, I'm going to change my posting schedule. I have been shooting for a new chapter every other day (The last couple were late sorry) but I wasn't very happy with myself upon rereading the last one. I know I didn't get to edit it, but it was more than grammatical stuff. Anyway, I'm going to be shooting for every three or four days, so that I can reread each update a few times before uploading it. Sorry if the extra day or two kills you. Lastly, I'm going to rewrite parts of chapter 7, seeing as how I wasn't pleased with it. It will mostly be the narration parts, so if you read it once, it probably won't affect the other chapters much. When I'm done with this, I may go back and redo a few others in a similar way, so if you care enough, I'll post on my profile when and which one has been edited.**


	9. Coat of Arms

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 9 _Coat of Arms_

 **A/N: Hi guys. Before you get to reading, I wanted to tell you about this new story by a friend and fan of mine, Squid84. I've mentioned him a few times before and now he's started his own high school AU Alpha and Omega story. So far only a short prologue is up, but a longer chapter 1 is supposed to come out later this week. He's been a big help to my writing so he definitely earned this advertising. The story is called** _ **Alpha and Omega: Life in the Fast Lane.**_

 **Favorite reviews:**

" **Saw the new update great as I say again. You showed Charlie's sister worrying side when she saw Humphrey coming back home with a bloody hand and hearing things from school their argument was confusing and irritating (For Humphrey) but that's Humphrey and Charlie also in the author's note I didn't see that line in the last chapter so to my understanding Kate reveals she likes Humphrey? You did a great job at making the names a little different to make more like a normal name though I didn't think you would think that Sweets or Candy stripper names and when they were interested in knowing what went down between Humphrey and Garth. Great chapter ncham9 :)" -H1ding in the shadows**

 **I should have posted one of his sooner but he is one of those people that I forgot. Sorry.**

" **Nice Chapter" -Xxthe dark shadowxX**

 **I don't know why, but something about his two word reviews is really nice. :)**

(Time skip: Wednesday Morning, two days after the fight)

(Humphrey's POV)

For some mysterious reason, the air in this state decided to be a delightful 43 degrees while there were still two more weeks of summer left, so that was nice. I managed to be decently warm by wearing a t-shirt under a blue plaid, short-sleeved button up, a plain blue hoodie, and jeans. On the way to my locker, down a frigid hallway, I was stopped by my group of three friends standing impedingly in my path.

"What's up guys?" I greeted. It'd been a long while since I'd talked to any of them, so playing it nice was a good strategy. I was only met by stoic, cold faces, staring at me viciously.

"You avoid us for the past four months, come back to school to ditch us for a clutch of girls, and all you came up with is 'What's up?'" Salty snorted incredulously. That being said, from the outside of my brain, it might actually look like how he described it.

Mooch put an assuring hand on Salty's shoulder, only to be violently shrugged off. He said, "Salty calm down" before turning to me and saying "He has a point Humphrey. What ever happened to bros before hoes?".

"First of all, watch who the fuck you're calling a ho." I demanded, angrily reminding them of the fact that both Kate and my sister were in the group of girls that I allegedly ditched them for. They backed up slightly in reaction to my outburst. More calmly, I continued "Secondly, Kate's back, she's new, and she's in like all of my classes, so I invited her and her sister to my table." .

They thought for a few seconds before Shakey spoke up, "Well what about those other two girls at lunch yesterday?"

"Who Sam and Candy?" I asked, receiving affirming nods. "I don't know. Kate just brought them over.". I fought a powerful urge to tell them how it wasn't any of their business if I hung out with a thousand girls instead of them, but it really wasn't worth it.

"So are you going out with Kate or what?" Salty inquired grouchily. He must have still been mad about something.

"No. Just friends as always.". That was a little hard to admit. We seemed just as close as ever, but it hurt to say that after three years apart, we're just back in the same spot when I wanted so much more.

"Man that's rough. You're getting into fights over her and she's not even putting out." he said in a casual attempt at male comradery.

"Watch your fucking mouth Salty!" I growled, seething at the remark. Never mind it being just an asinine thing to say, no one was going to talk about Kate like that to my face. She's too good for that. She's different from the other girls in the school who would sleep with any guy if it made them more popular.

"Alright." He replied, raising his hands in surrender.

"How'd you guys hear about that anyway?" I queried. Everybody seemed to know what happened the moment I left the school.

Mooch answered, "I heard from a kid in my psych class and I told these two."

"I heard you dislocated Garth's jaw and when you left, he popped it back in himself and went home. He's not coming back until the bruises go away." Shakey added.

"That sucks." I said. The three guys stared with eyes the size of saucers and agape mouths. "What? I wasn't trying to dislocate anything on him. He just should have shut up sooner and I reacted."

"Well next time, you should call me." Salty offered, puffing his chest out dramatically.

I laughed and said "Whatever" as I started to walk toward my locker and more specifically, Kate. In the time it took me to get to her, I thought about how much of an asshole Salty was being, even if he probably didn't mean it. I guessed that maybe he could have been trying to help or something but it came off as offensive. It didn't matter. I could easily get over it.

When I reached my destination I saw Kate, but with her were Sam and Candy.

As they saw me, the three of them simultaneously greeted me "Hey Humphrey." before laughing amongst themselves.

"Don't do that. It's creepy." I said, opening my locker to load and unload belongings. To preserve what I had left of my sanity, I didn't dwell on how it seemed like they had practiced what they said.

"What took you so long?" Kate complained with a hand on her hip, a luscious, tantalizing hip. I choked on a little bit of air as I realized that she asked a question.

"Umm…I was talking to Salty, Shakey, and Mooch." I answered like I was providing an alibi. Actually, it did feel a lot like an interrogation. They had me close to cornered against the wall.

"What were you talking about?" she probed further. I had to think about what to answer to that. I was pretty sure that I didn't want to say 'how you girls are all hoes' or something that would reveal as much information.

"Monday and everything." I chose.

"Discussing punching techniques?" Candy suggested.

"Something like that." I lied. This was starting to get really uncomfortable for me. So, I decided to try and drop the conversation entirely. I closed my locker and said "Kate we should get going.".

"Ugh. You're no fun." Sweets joked.

"Well you all can get detentions for being late, but I'm going." I said, starting my daring escape. I slipped passed the three girls and began making my way down the hallway. Kate said something quietly to the other two and they nodded in agreement.

"Wait up." She exclaimed before running to catch me. When she came even to me, a slender arm slithered between mine and my left side. I looked to the perpetrating limb and then to Kate's face.

"What? You're warm." She defended, rubbing her face into my hoodie's sleeve. I raised an eyebrow for a moment, but returned to focusing on what was in front of me as we walked. I wished for even the slightest understanding of flirtation so that I could tell if I was experiencing that or being friend-zoned back into the stone ages. Such is the mystery of life. Either answer was good enough for me, but one was clearly preferable. The way she clutched my appendage seemed a lot more sisterly than sexy, though. Once again, I'm way overthinking this.

I couldn't help but notice what she was wearing. She had on a tank top and jean shorts. What the hell was she thinking this morning? Under three layers of clothes, I was still freezing.

We got into Calculus a little early, so we had some time before the test. When I got into my desk, I looked over at Kate. Her bare and previously soft arms were stippled with goose-bumps. She shivered slightly as she sat into the no doubt cold chair. I unzipped and removed my outerwear sympathetically.

"Here." I said as I offered it in an outstretched hand. She jumped at the gesture in surprise.

She shook her head and answered "No I couldn't…". I rolled my eyes and looked at her critically.

"Kate we both know you're cold and you're wearing, like, nothing. Take the stupid hoodie." I told her, looking challengingly into her mystifying gaze. She stared back for a while with irises like expressive sunflowers, until she eventually gave up and accepted the article.

"Thank you." She muttered sweetly and grateful smile.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." I joked, waving a hand at her dismissively. When I finished my over-dramatic act, I smiled back, appreciative of the gentle giggles escaping her. "Good luck." I said in regards to the test just now being distributed.

"You too."

Sixth period rolled around leisurely and I walked with Kate from her class to the cafeteria. With us were Candy, Sam, and Charlie. I bet if I had been able to see all of us in the hallway, I would have burst out laughing at me and my following of women. Then again, I probably looked like I'm their gay, guy friend. Yeah, that's probably more likely. I dress too well. When my harem and I, who would all collectively kill me for saying that anywhere but inside my head, sat down, I somehow wound up between Sam and Kate as opposed to my usual end seat next to Kate. I wouldn't normally mind so much, but Sam was unusually close to me in her seat and I couldn't help but feel a little sandwiched, especially considering how I'm a pretty big guy. Being as shy as I am, however, I didn't mention it.

I returned my attention to my food, which thankfully included some French fries today. After a few rounds of guiding my meal into my mouth, a foreign hand, covered almost to the knuckles in a familiar blue fabric, came to my tray of food and took two fries. My jaw went slack in disbelief as I turned to face the daring thief. It had to have been a seasoned criminal with balls of steel to attempt a daytime heist of this caliber. To absolutely no one's surprise, I saw Kate stuffing the stolen goods into her mouth. Okay, so maybe they didn't need the balls of steel, at least I hope not.

We locked eyes as she scarfed down the food and she narrowed hers to a scowl. She raised her fists in front of her face and said "You wanna go?". She has been having a lot of fun at my expense lately. She even told me how that fiasco this morning was only an attempt to show Candy and Sam how nervous she can make me. No longer shall these transgressions go unpunished.

"So Lily, you know this story already, but have I told the rest of you what happened the last time I went to Kate's house?" I asked, staring daggers at Kate. She went wide-eyed and dropped her hands to the table.

"You wouldn't." she told me. I knew I was playing with fire, but it was a well-deserved retaliation.

Ignoring her, I continued "Yeah, so she was on these heavy antibiotics and painkillers-Aagh!", yelping as a hand purposefully found its way to my right leg, fingers stretching to my inner thigh. I removed Kate's attempt at distraction away and once again continued "Well, she asked me to watch her because she was blacking out and her parents weren't home."

She finally begged "Okay Humph! I'm sorry.". I promptly shut up and smiled at her arrogantly. My tongue slipped between my lips and brandished itself mockingly to Kate. In response, she reached toward my shirt, grabbed the tiniest bit of skin between her two fingernails and squeezed so hard that I think they touched.

"Ow. Hey!" I whined back. She let out an indignant huff and returned to eating.

"Woah, wait a minute. I wanna hear the rest of the story." Candy implored from across the table. I shrugged my apology. "Aww come on.". I shook my head, knowing that if I said another word about it, Kate would beat the living hell out of me.

"It doesn't matter; I can tell you!" Lily exclaimed proudly.

"Wait, no! Don't Lily I was bluffing." I yelled as she started her explanation. I put my head in my hands and I think there was a flurry of kicking under the table between her and Kate before the older sister covered her ears.

"So Kate was super high." She began. I groaned into my palms. "And she convinced Humphrey to sleep in her room and practically begged him for sex for like ten minutes." She finished, smiling devilishly. The other girls gasped in awe.

"But nothing happened!" I announced defensively.

"So that's why you were so grumpy that morning." Charlie guessed, causing an uproar at the table, save for a blushing me and a Kate, who was still listening to some muffled version of the conversation.

After the hysteria died down, Kate asked me "Is it safe?". She kinda yelled it because she couldn't hear herself. I gave an embarrassed nod and she uncovered her ears.

Sam then half-jokingly asked "So Humphrey, you're definitely gay right?"

"Yes…" Charlie answered before I could.

"W-What?! No." I proclaimed, blushing to a deeper red.

"Really, because you've been friends with Kate for what? Eight years?" Sam continued.

"Five. She was away for three." I interrupted.

"Right. So, you're friends for five years and suddenly she's throwing herself at you and you don't do anything about it? Pretty suspicious for a straight guy."

"Hey!" Kate shouted angrily. She exchanged glares with the girl.

I spoke up again, "No I didn't; because we're just friends and she was completely out of it anyway, so I'm pretty sure that'd be illegal. Either way, it's not right. But just because I have some self-respect doesn't mean I'm gay!".

"Well what about how you haven't had a girlfriend since you came to Jasper High?" Candy asked, disregarding the mere fact that it was none of her freaking business.

"You haven't had a girlfriend in three years?" Kate echoed with an astonished expression.

"No. And what's that supposed to mean? How many boyfriends have _you_ had since you left?" I returned to her.

"Well none but…why didn't you?"

"Because of this." I said, gesturing to the table at large. "You guys have been here for twenty minutes and I'm already going crazy. I have no idea how to deal with any of that." I admitted. I got a few condescending, responsorial 'aww's, but what I said was true. I really have no idea about any of this. Sure I can talk to girls alright, without turning into a stuttering, sweaty mess…most of the time. On top of the anxiety, depression, school, and a sister with her head up her ass, I didn't need to add girl troubles to the mix; even if I really, really wanted to. The awkward silence that was transpiring was completely drowned out by my loud thoughts.

"Hey, Kate…" Charlie started. I was worried about what would come next.

"Yes."

"Is that Humphrey's sweater?" she asked, quite nosily if you ask me. She must be really proud of how far she put herself in my business.

"Yeah. I was cold this morning and he made me take it." She kidded, nudging me in the ribs with her elbow.

"You wouldn't stop complaining." I exaggerated.

"How come every time I say I'm cold you tell me to go for a warm up run?" she whined needlessly.

"Because you're my sister and I don't care what you think of me." I answered. Sure it was a lie, but she didn't need to hear that right now. She had a big head that needed deflating.

"Whatever." She said, exasperatedly eating her lunch.

Eventually the five girls and I finished our food and trudged toward our nest classes. On the way to ours, Kate latched onto me again. "Thanks for saying no to me." she said softly.

"You mean the…y'know?" I very inexplicitly said.

"Mhm." she responded.

"You don't have to thank me for something I didn't do." I laughed.

"Okay, fine. Thanks for the hoodie." She tried again. It was gratifying enough to see her draped in my clothes. Honestly, it was a little…arousing too. Something about it was very attractive. Almost as if she had come into my bedroom wearing one of my dress shirts with only half of the buttons done and kinda revealing her…never mind.

"You already said thank you for that." I pointed out, when I should have just taken the sentiment. Sometimes I feel like Charlie might be right about me being stubborn. Most of the time I remember how she's never right about anything else and shrug it off.

"Yeah, I know, but it's so soft and warm." She said, pulling the too long sleeves further down her hands.

"I know. That's why I wanted to wear it today." I said, sarcastically. As much as it was actually my favorite hoodie, I liked it better on her. "You pull it off better, though." I added. It felt a little unnatural for me to be talking so…smoothly. She didn't respond, just stayed attached to my arm as we walked. It was nice.

The rest of school went uneventfully. There were a lot of boring classes and a lot of uninterrupted Kate time, apart from the barking teachers who insisted upon speaking to the class. Unbelievable, right?

When it finally ended, I collected Charlie and my belongings to go home. Half of the drive through, I exclaimed "Shit!".

"What?" Charlie yelled back, startled by the sudden outburst.

"Nothing, sorry. I just forgot to get my hoodie back from Kate." I clarified.

"You lent a hoodie to a sixteen year old girl and didn't make sure you got it back?" she asked incredulously.

"I think that was implied in 'forgot to get my hoodie back'."

"You really don't know anything about this, do you?" she scoffed, folding her arms.

"That's what I said. What are you talking about anyway?" I asked, covertly admitting that she knew more about girls than I did. I can really, really never tell her that.

"She's not going to give it back. She likes you. It's, like…girl flirting 101." She informed me. Okay, maybe she didn't know more than I did.

"You're so full of BS. We're just friends and it's been that way for years." I said, sadly looking through the windshield to hide my emotions

"If you weren't going to listen, why'd you ask?" She sarcastically said through an overly-nasal voice. It was clear that she was making fun of me, considering the stupid impression and the blatant stealing of my line.

"Was that supposed to be me?" I asked, knowing the answer already.

"Yeah. Pretty good, right?"

In a pompous white girl's voice **(no offense but you know exactly what I'm talking about),** replied"What-evarr.". She scrunched up her face indignantly and punched me in the arm. It made me swerve the car a little and I yelled back "Hey! What's wrong with you? You don't hit the driver. Are you trying to get us killed?".

"Worth it." She said, before shrinking in her seat and feeling vindicated.

We got to the house and inside, Paul was waiting for us, sorting mail at the kitchen table.

"Hey guys." He greeted as we stepped in. Charlie went over to him and hugged his shoulder. "Good day?" he asked her. She nodded and moved to scavenge through the refrigerator. "How about you Humphrey?"

"It was good." I answered blankly. I didn't think it merited a detailed answer.

"You have a letter." He said, extending an unopened envelope to me. He wasn't one of those parents that would open it first and then tell you about it. That'd get very annoying very quickly.

"Who's it from?" Charlie asked, once again butting into my affairs.

I looked at the front of the letter to see the words "Fort Dix, New Jersey" printed at the top of it.

"I-It's from Fort Dix." I shakily answered. Charlie almost threw the bottle of water that she was holding onto the countertop and ran over to me.

"What does it say?" she said as she stood at my side while I ripped open the paper and unfolded the leaflet inside.

I read aloud:

 _Dear Mr. Humphrey Wilson._

 _It is my pleasure to notify you that your adoption request for a MWD (Military Working Dog) has been accepted. This morning at 06:00 hours EST, Tuesday, September 7, your dog arrived via C130 from Lackland Air Force Base, Texas. She is a 4 year old, 71.2 pound Belgian Malimois, named Bailey. She was retired 8 months ago after being wounded in the rear, left leg by shrapnel as a result of an exploding I.E.D. which she bravely detected for the marines in Iraq. She recovered, but her leg had not completely regained its strength and as such, she was not deemed fit for further military action. She received a purple heart for the injury and was awarded the Navy Distinguished Service Medal for her actions. She will be delivered at 16:00 hours EST on Friday, September 10. Congratulations._

That was it. We were finally getting a dog after 16 months of waiting on a list of hundreds of names. Not only that, we were getting a decorated veteran. I was at a loss for a reaction. Charlie was not so.

"Oh my god!" she squealed and I winced at the ear splitting sound. "I can't believe it. We're getting a puppy!"

"I'm pretty sure the letter said I'm getting a puppy." I pointed out, receiving another punch in the arm. Admittedly, that was well deserved. I was excited, too, despite my expression testifying to the contrary. Like Charlie said, it was unbelievable. For a long time, it seemed like it wasn't even going to happen.

"We should go out and celebrate." Paul suggested.

"That's a great idea." Charlie declared. "Let's go get dinner."

I nodded, but said "I have to do something first.". I ran upstairs, pulled my phone out of my pocket, and texted Kate "I have some news. Skype?".

She responded "K".

In my room, I pulled my laptop onto my lap on my bed and opened the Skype application. When I saw Kate's profile online as well, I called her. The call opened up, and through her webcam, I could see her sitting on her bed as well, scantily clad in the same tank top. In corner of the screen, I could see that teddy bear which I had taken note of last Friday. With that in mind and my eyes back to fixating on the supple valley in the center of her almost bare chest, I completely lost my train of thought.

"Hi Humphrey." She said.

"Hi. Hey do you mind if I ask about that teddy bear on your bed." I asked as tactfully as possible. She blushed to a nice rose complexion.

"You saw that huh?" she confirmed, reaching behind her to grab the plushy and place it in full view.

"Well I first saw it when I came over your house but yeah. Why do I feel like I've seen it before?" I said, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly. I wasn't trying to make her embarrassed and I guess I'm just empathetic.

"Humphrey, you bought this for me on a field trip when we were ten." She told me, stroking the top of the toy's head with her thumb.

"And you kept it?" I asked, sort of remembering my clueless gesture in fifth grade and comparing it to my still clueless, present self.

"Well yeah. That was really nice of you and plus, it's super soft."

"I bet." I replied. Everything about her just makes me want to smile; the sentimental way she kept the gift, to the ever present smile upon her face, to her angelic laugh, and that ungodly distracting cleavage. I know I shouldn't look at it but intentionally or not, she was practically offering it up on a silver platter.

"So you had some news?" she asked, pulling me from my inappropriate thoughts.

"Oh yeah. I totally forgot. I'm getting a dog in two days."

"Really? That's awesome. What kind?" she asked, dissipating her blush with an excited smile.

"A Belgian Malimois. It's kinda like a German Shepard with a little shorter fur, but that's not even the cool part. She's an Iraq veteran!" I stated proudly. It was hard not to. There was such a strong sense of patriotism and righteousness that came from sheltering an ex-marine in my own home.

"Wow. That's great Humph. Can I come over and meet her when she gets there?"

"Sure. She gets delivered at four o'clock. If you want, I can drive you from school and we can hang out until she comes." I suggested. Kate nodded furiously, in a display that shook her whole body. Not that I should have noticed, but she was kinda…jiggling in front of me. "Alright Kate. I have to go. We're eating at a restaurant to celebrate." I said, trying to avoid how much more distracted I would get if I didn't have anything else to tell her.

"Okay, bye. Have fun." She said, waving her arm in salutation and inadvertently bouncing some more.

"I will. Bye." I hurriedly said and hung up. I let out a relaxed sigh after having gotten a little worked up. After a minute, I put on a big smile and went back downstairs to start celebrating.

 **A/N: So what did you think? Please tell me in a review. There is nothing quite like hearing feedback on something you created and seeing the number of reviews go up. It's the highlight of my day. So that's cool about Humphrey and Bailey and that sucks about his hoodie. I also hope I didn't offend anyone with the questioning of Humphrey's sexuality. It wasn't meant to be derogatory in any way. I'll try to keep this A/N short so good night everybody.**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**

 **p.s. I forgot to tell you. This story passed 2,000 views and 750 visitors, already beyond my now completed first story** _ **Love Me for Mine**_ **and my expectations. Also, with this chapter,** _ **The Value of a**_ _ **Life**_ **has officially left being a short story, and is now a novel (the distinction being 40,000 words). So yay!**


	10. Testing Your Medal

" **The Value of a Life"**

Chapter 10 _Testing Your Medal_

 **A/N: Hi guys. This is a little later than I wanted but thankfully not later than I promised. I thought this was kind of an emotion heavy chapter so be wary.**

 **Favorite Review:**

" **Wow, I never knew that adopting retired military dogs was an actual thing! Thanks for exposing me to the whole idea, it may play something out in my future…I don't know. This chapter was a great as always and was a bit humorous too. It was a fun read. I really can't wait until the next chapter to see how everything will play out. Congrats on all the milestones that we, your supporters have provided you. I know that we all appreciate the work you have put into this incredible story. Keep up the good work!" –XxTheRedPandaxX**

" **Love this story. 5*" –Kellylad13**

 **I'm glad that I earned five asterisks :D**

(Friday, September 10)

(Humphrey's POV)

Today's the day. By four o'clock, we'll be welcoming a hero into our home. In my mind, I was bouncing off the walls in anticipation, but on the outside, I was doing my best to control myself. If I let myself get too excited, this school day would be brutal. Charlie must not have that kind of self-control, because she somehow woke up very 'sick' this morning and opted out of going to school. Have I thought about how she's irresponsible? Great, now I'm talking to myself _and_ having memory loss.

At the very least, I got to have a pleasant ride to school, devoid of constant blabbering and invasive questions. I tapped on the steering wheel the entire way there with anxious fingers. I wondered: what if the dog doesn't like me? What if she's really attached to her old handler? What if her leg is really messed up and she can never run anywhere or walk without help? What if she has PTSD? I stopped the line of inquiry there, realizing how it had slipped into absurdity. I laughed at the mental image of sharing psychotherapist appointments with my dog.

I walked into school, genuinely excited for once. I strolled to my locker routinely and like every other day, Kate was there, wearing _someone's_ blue hoodie and jeans and flashing me a perfect, glistening smile. It was much more excited than normal, which sounds impossible, but there was definitely a good reason for it.

"Hi Humph." She greeted cheerily.

"Morning Kate. What's up?" I returned. As much as I didn't like childhood nicknames, I'd listen to any thing she'd call me. She sweetly looked back at me, holding her hands together behind her back and shuffling cutely while I perused my collection of textbooks.

"Am I still coming over?" she asked, as if I'd ever turn her down. Sure I wanted to see my new pet, but she was the part that made it sound like so much fun. I'd been looking forward to spending a few hours with her and the dog, probably winding up staring at her and thinking of what _else_ I want to do with her. Brain, cut it out!

"I don't know. Are you?" I snarked back. She gave an exasperated furrow of her eyebrows and placed a hand on her cocked hip. "You're very much still invited, if that's what you're asking." I finally answered.

"Okay." she replied, giving me a light nudge in the arm with her elbow. I looked to the offending arm, covered in stolen blue fabric.

"Hey that's a nice jacket." I started sarcastically. "Where'd you get it?"

"Oh this?" she said, pulling at the neck of the hoodie. "I tricked this really dumb kid in my math class into giving it to me.". I'm spending too much time with her. I can't be out-joked by someone like this. It's just not natural. Despite that, I laughed at her humor because it was admittedly pretty funny.

"Hey. I didn't give it to you, I lent it."

"Really? When did you tell me to give it back?" she asked, all too knowingly. She's good.

"I figured I would be unzipping it off of your frozen carcass in a couple of minutes anyway, so I tried to be nice in the meantime." I retorted. We laughed together again. It felt like we haven't stopped since she came back to Jasper, and I was sure that I didn't want to. Kate has this way of making me feel…like myself again, not the moping, lonely sad-sack that I lived with for the past two years. I realized that I can't ever tell her about me. It would change too much and I couldn't handle that. I want everything and more importantly everyone to stay how they are now. I've been waiting for her to come back for so long and I'm not keen to flip this…whatever we have on its head.

"-mphrey. Humphrey!" I heard, bringing me back to reality.

"Huh? What?" I asked, shaking my head from its daze.

"I said, 'do you want to get to class?'" She repeated. She stifled a giggle to herself, probably about me having the attention span of a Chihuahua.

"Sure." I said, closing my locker door and nudging my head to the direction of our next period. We started walking and while she wasn't exactly far away from me, she wasn't hanging off of my arm like always. I wasn't entirely sure if I wanted it gone.

"So, watcha thinking so hard about?" she asked, looking up at me with sweet, caring eyes.

"Umm…nothing." I lied. "Just how I'm going to beat you up later for my hoodie."

"Maybe not a smart move. I'd have to call up my crew to deal with you." She replied, mocking a deep, Italian mobster's voice.

"Really? What crew? Lily, Candy, and Sam?" I asked defiantly.

"And Charlie." Kate added with a smirk.

"I'd argue about that, but you're probably right." I laughed, knowing that Charlie would jump on any opportunity to hit me. "You know she didn't even come into today? Unbelievable."

"I probably wouldn't have either." Kate admitted. "But I'm glad you came anyway." She said as she brought lean, warm arms around me. I tenderly laid a hand on her shoulder, arm extending behind her and thumb caressing the muscle over the joint. The position felt…comfortable. It was familiar and fairly static. It made me not want to move at all like a statue, but only because it felt so right to be exactly where I was, in her hold.

We walked in each other's arms into the classroom where we parted to sit in our seats. I craned my neck to shoot a soft smile at Kate. When she returned it, I put my head on the desk to peacefully sleep away the remaining free time.

A few minutes into my nap, a hand lightly fell onto my arm. I looked up to meet those beautiful amber eyes, like perfectly crafted caramel, well befitting her sweet personality. Contrasting with her always lively gaze, she bore a serious scowl over her lips.

"What?" I asked, concerned with what might be causing the look. She closed her eyes slowly and grimly before turning her head over her shoulder to gesture to the seat behind her. Her eyes came back to face me solemnly, while I leaned forward in my seat to see what was going on. In the designated desk sat Garth who must have been previously looking at me, because once I noticed him, he stared holes into the wooden surface in front of him.

I took in his appearance. The bruises were mostly healed, slight, yellow tinges behind his jaw trying to hide themselves in the collar of his varsity jacket. His reddish locks, normally gelled into place, were matted on the back of his head, an obvious result of the haphazard sleep which befell him while he was gone. His lower mandible seemed appropriately aligned and a cut on his cheekbone seemed to be healing. At least he was too ashamed of losing the fight to press charges or even tell the school.

I let out a calm breath and sat up in my seat, while I deliberated on what to do. As much as I still wanted to be mad at him for what he said and especially for what he did to Kate, I couldn't. All that I saw was high school age guy who did a couple of stupid things, said a few too many words, and suffered a shattered ego and almost a bone because of it. With a steely expression, I rose to my feet and walked around my desk toward his. As I stood, Kate was overcome with surprise and frantically shook her head in silent disapproval. When I walked by, she held a cautionary hand in my path. I looked at her firmly before grasping it in my own, brushing over the knuckles with a reassuring digit, and removed it from my way. I made it to the desk adjacent to his and placed myself in it.

He looked over through narrowed, glaring eyes, before warily leaning away from me and saying "What do you want?".

I looked to the ground and said "I came over to say I'm sorry.". I suddenly became very aware of the numerous sets of spectating eyes in the classroom, accompanied by whispering mouths. I glanced back at Kate for support and was confronted by a proud, encouraging smile. I looked back at the wide-eyed Garth next to me and admitted "I got a little too upset and over-reacted. I shouldn't have hit you like I did and I could have handled it better. Are you okay?".

The boy was apparently dumbfounded by my apology because he didn't answer for a few moments. "Yeah…I-I'm fine." He shakily testified. He stared at me like I'd unknowingly grown a second head.

"How's your jaw?" I continued, trying to wrap up the conversation and clear my conscience.

"It's fine too." He explained reluctantly, opening his mouth and stretching the connecting muscles.

"Glad to hear it. See you around." I said formally as I got up and walked back to my assigned seat next to Kate. When I got into the chair and began lowering my head back onto the tabletop she tapped my arm with the back of her hand. I glared at her interruption of my sleeping, like a dragon awakened from a thousand year slumber in its nest. In silent admiration, she nodded her head. At least I made her happy. She must've really hated the idea of me fighting for whatever reason. I only apologized because it seemed really stupid to have some years-long grudge against someone who's just a bit of an ass sometimes. I'd rather go back to politely ignoring his existence.

By the time lunch rolled around, I was starving. I went straight to the cafeteria as quickly as possible, not stopping to pick up Kate and friends. I made it in time to beat the line for the most part and got to my table, where I began scarfing down the food like a wild animal. A minute later, Kate walked over, missing the other girls. As she sat down, she reached to my tray and grabbed a handful of my French fries.

"Get your own." I sassed through a hand covering my food stuffed mouth.

"I would." She replied. "But the line's too long and I forgot my lunch money anyway. Plus, yours are always better." She continued, smirking victoriously. I reached into my left pocket and pulled out my wallet. A hand came from my right and wrapped itself around my wrist sternly. "Don't even think about it." She commanded.

"But…" I began, only to get interrupted.

"No." she insisted. I reluctantly obliged and replaced the article into my pants. "Thank you." She added.

"I wouldn't have minded paying. You look hungry." I said, looking unsurely at my own food and then back to her.

"I said no, but thanks." She repeated. I still felt bad, eating in front of her and probably making her even more starving, despite the theft. I nudged my tray towards her a little more, so that it rested between us.

"Compromise." I offered happily. I don't think I'd be able to eat with her looking like that, even though I was a lot hungrier myself than I let on. She smiled graciously and grabbed another pair of fries.

The other girls came over and sat down, staring curiously at the shared plate between us. None of them brought it up, but I'm sure they all wanted to ask about it. There was an uncomfortable, conversation-less air floating around between us.

"So I heard Garth is back." Sam finally interjected toward me. I think we all let out a relieved sigh that the silence had been filled.

"Yeah. So?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Well…did you…did you see him?" she clarified, acting like I might hit her for asking.

"Yeah he's in a couple of my classes. He seems like a nice guy. Why?" I said, playing stupid. The girls, aside from an already aware Kate, scoffed in frustration. Sam rolled her eyes dramatically.

"Did you pound an apology out of him?" Lily blurted nonchalantly. I ignored the egregious implication that I just go around attacking people (despite the evidence thereof).

"Actually, kinda the opposite." I responded.

"An apology beat him out of you?" Candy asked sarcastically. I'm a really bad influence.

"Very funny. I saw him first period and apologized." I explicated grudgingly. I know that I didn't have to explain myself, but I told them anyway, albeit with a grumble.

"So are you best buds now?" Sam jokingly asked.

"No. He's still kind of a dick but I don't want any bad blood." I responded, growing tired of the questioning.

"Well did he say sorry?" she continued.

"No." I answered bluntly.

"And you're okay with that?" Candy chimed in.

"I really don't care." I said, almost feeling the steam leaking from my ears.

"Well what did he say?" Lily inquired. I was starting to feel very poked and prodded. The questions themselves weren't getting under my skin, just the rapid succession of them. I was feeling I was being interviewed about my life story in five minutes. I felt my fingers curl into themselves and short fingernail still manage to dig into my palms, teetering on the edge of drawing blood.

Kate noticed my escalating disposition and before I could angrily reply, she said "Guys, leave him alone, alright?". She placed a calming hand between my shoulder blades. At least someone was on my side.

"Sorry." They apologized contritely.

I took a second to regain my composure, said "It's okay.". I glanced at Kate and saw her bolstering grin, parting smooth, pink lips.

"So Humphrey, are you excited about getting a puppy?" Candy asked in an attempt at tension relief; however Kate glared at her, no doubt cursing her asking yet another question.

I laughed at her protective care over me, before answering "She's a little old to be called a puppy but yeah, I am."

"All dogs are puppies." Sam added in defense of her sister. That really wasn't worth correcting. There wasn't going to be any convincing her.

"Oh Lily. I forgot to say that I'm going over Humphrey's house after school to meet her." Kate informed the younger girl.

"What? Why don't I get to go?" Lily exclaimed indignantly.

"Because she's nice." I reasoned sarcastically, receiving the pointed toe of a shoe in my shin. "Ow! See."

"I can be nice." She declared insolently.

"Really? Say please." Kate commanded.

"Ugh! Please?" she grumbled unwillingly.

"Did it taste like vinegar?" I asked, smiling to Kate. She shrugged her shoulders and Lily rolled her eyes. "Okay, I guess you can come." I said in mock reluctance.

Four o'clock finally reared its ugly head after what felt like months of anticipation. Another agonizing three minutes pass and there is a polite knock on the door. I jump from the couch to answer it, leaving the two sisters and my own to smile in their seats giddily. Standing on the front porch was a young man, dressed in a crisp, black jacket with red lining and pressed, blue pants, clutching a white clipboard.

"Mr. Humphrey Wilson?" he asked formally, looking at the papers attached to the board.

"Yes."

"Good afternoon." He said, stretching an open, white glove encased hand toward me and shaking mine firmly. He handed the clipboard and bore a smile, well-practiced and proper. I signed several forms, mostly things to do with transfer of ownership from the Department of Defense to me and a contract that prohibits the sale or use of this dog for security or substance detection work under federal law.

After documents were completed, I handed them back and the uniformed marine in front of me returned to the olive green Humvee parked at the curb. When he reached the car's rear, right door, he opened it and out stepped a beautiful Belgian Malimois, leashed on a steel choke collar and sporting a stunning coat of various tans and browns. Her ears stood straight, pointed and imposing, while her muzzle was closed nervously.

The man determinedly led the dog to me, standing in the door and upon reaching me, handed me the short, black nylon leash, and produced two felt boxes, one containing a golden medallion, stamped with an eagle and attached to a small white star with an anchor in the middle, and the other a small golden heart with a portrait of George Washington on a purple background. I looked back to the marine, edging on teary eyes. He nodded his head curtly and solemnly. I returned the gesture and he turned and walked toward his vehicle.

I brought the animal inside and closed the door behind us. I knelt to the ground and stared at the dog. She bore a leather collar, on which her dog tags hung. I thumbed over the ovular steel and the letters pressed into it, spelling Bailey above her 7 digit ID number. She sat in front of me as I slid my hand from the collars on her neck up to her right ear where I could see the number tattooed on the soft, bare skin on the inside.

I rubbed my hand back over her ear and down her neck while I looked into her entrancing eyes. They told me mystifying stories. In them, I saw long days of training in hot, distant deserts and deep, cool naps on hard floors. I saw the care she had for the people she met and protected, and the longing to see them again. I saw the pain she went through, the destruction she saw, and the immense amount of bravery that she mustered up to get back on her feet. I saw the disappointment she had when they told her that she couldn't work anymore, do the one thing she was so meticulously bred and raised for. All of these things were etched into her irises, waiting to be read.

While I stared into her burning, amber eyes, which had an uncomfortable resemblance to Kate's, she stared back. I could feel her too knowing eyes drill straight through the walls that I put up to keep people out of my real emotions and gazing through my façade of counterfeit happiness. I could feel her looking at me, not seeing what everyone else was allowed, but the deeper, scared and sad and tired, lonely boy that was really there. In that room, there were two broken beings who finally found someone to relate to. I eventually felt the water that had been pooling in one of my eyes run down my hot cheek, seemingly the only outward expression of a real emotion that I had released in years.

I didn't notice myself hedging forward slightly. When I realized that our proximity had shortened to mere inches I stopped and looked at the dog. She dropped her eyes, apparently in a show of sullen respect, and leaned the last few inches between us, to where our foreheads touched. My lips quivered and she brought her nose up, under my chin and nuzzled it around my neck as she lifted a paw and placed it on my shoulder. It sent shivers down my spine, how she acted with so much kindness and understanding. I rubbed a line back to behind her ear and scratched lovingly at its base. She licked the tear from my cheek and I smiled, feeling the warmest I ever had in possibly forever.

I stood up with a sniffle and Bailey rose to her feet as well. We both turned to see the three girls staring at us over the sofa, grinning menacingly. I awkwardly rubbed the back of my neck.

"Umm…" I started, only to have words fail me. "What?" I asked, hoping to receive a gentle answer. I walked around the sofa to sit on its arm with Bailey at my feet. She panted happily as she waited to meet the new people in front of her.

"Can I?" Lily asked innocently, gesturing toward her. I was worried that she would be the next person for Bailey to meet, knowing her kind of aggressive tendencies, but she asked and I wouldn't say know.

"Just…go easy." I warned, reaching toward the dog's neck and reassuringly stroking at the soft tufts of fur.

Lily walked toward her and sat on the floor. She stretched a cautious hand toward Bailey, before backing it away.

"It's not going to bite me is it?" she asked, looking up at me from the ground with a slightly scared face.

"She." I corrected indignantly. I was suddenly offended by any implication that Bailey was anything less than a friend and veteran. I corrected my tone, aware of the fact that she is still a big dog, so fear is expected. "She wasn't an attack dog; she was in substance detection." I explained, to the still unconvinced, white-haired girl. I sighed in exasperation before saying "Here." and grabbing her hand. I brought it, engulfed entirely in my palm, to Bailey's chest. Throughout the motion she stared and the approaching limb, but made no dissenting moves. Lily relaxed a little more as the dog accepted her petting.

"Humphrey, she's gorgeous." Kate said, sliding to the floor and crawling slowly toward the beast. Bailey laid on her stomach and inched towards the girl. She sniffed the hand Kate offered and decided it was ok to lick. Kate giggled at the sensation. "It tickles." She announced.

"She seems to be really interested in whatever's on your hand. Gotten into any drugs or bombs lately?" I joked. She attempted a glare, but it was defeated by her amused smile.

An hour passed, filled with belly rubs and stupid voices from three girls, and the two sisters left to their nearby home. Bailey and I were both thoroughly exhausted. I leaned back into the sofa and patted the seat next to me.

"Come on girl." I encouraged and the dog leapt onto the cushion and laid down with her head in my lap. I idly stroked her ears while I stared intently into the box of her purple heart. My hand drifted from to her back leg, where I found a long scar hidden under the fur. I felt along the six inches of rough, improperly healed tissue, a torn and repaired seam on a fabric that could never again have the same prowess. I looked to the reverse side of the award to see the words _For Military Merit_ cut into the metal.

I almost cried again. I wondered if she ever thought about what she was doing when she was searching for explosives. I questioned if she regretted her actions at all, if she wished she could go back and turn away. Then I thought about how she never volunteered for her job, but she did it anyway. She served without option, but willingly anyway, and she nearly sacrificed her life for the country. Well, maybe she didn't do it for the country; she probably did it for the man at the end of her leash and her brothers in arms, standing with her. Loyalty like that doesn't come from everyone.

She shifted to look up at my face and I could have sworn she was telling me "I'm okay now.". I closed the medal's case to give her the full attention of my hands. She purred into the touch and drifted off to sleep, curled into my side. Who am I kidding? She did it so they would pet her.

 **A/N: So, good stuff? Please review. It's a big part of the fun of writing. I have two requests to make of you guys aside from that though. Firstly, if you ever think something is too cool or absurd to be believable, tell me about it. The last thing that I want is for this to feel unrealistic, so hold me to it. Secondly, if you have any ideas that you think would make a nice addition to the story, or just something that you would really like to see, pm me. I want you guys to have input into the story. If it's something huge concerning the plot line, I very likely may not do it and I can't promise that I'll put any other one in, but tell me anyway. Suggestions are always welcomed. Also, I had to correct a continuity error in the last chapter. I said in the letter that Bailey was working for the Marines, but she received an Army distinguished service star. I fixed it to a Navy Distinguished Service Star (Which is also given to marines). Anyway, see you next time. :D**

 **-Nick(Ncham9)**

 **p.s. When this chapter goes up, this story will likely get the six views and 76 visitors that it needs to reach 2500 and 1000 respectively. Thanks so much for your support.**


	11. Just a Little Bit Schizophrenic

" **The Value of a Life"**

Chapter 11 _Just a little bit Schizophrenic_

 **A/N: I'm a couple of days late and this chapter is not as long as it should be with the time that I had. I owe you guys a lot of things, not the least of which being an explanation, an apology, and this chapter, and maybe with some interest; all of which will be in the A/N below, minus the interest. It's pretty important to me that you guys read that. A word of warning: this chapter is not a happy one, and this story won't be as happy for a good long while. Sorry in advance.**

 **Favorite review:**

" **Nick, so far this story is absolutely fantastic! Keep it up dude!" –LifeDriftsOn**

 **He made an account and I was his first favorite. :)**

(Humphrey's POV)

 **(If it isn't abundantly clear, Humphrey is talking to Bailey at his house)**

Wretched, disgusting, horrible, and miserable. That's what Mondays are, the unholy offspring of not enough sleep, procrastination, and the harrowing realization that free time is over and you have to actually do something. If there was ever a day that deserved to have its throat punched, it was Monday. I bet it bullies the other days of the week. It probably takes Sunday's lunch money and gets help from Wednesday, the traitorous, mid-week prick.

And then there was school today, which is outrageous. Mondays should be spent cowering in fear inside of safe, cozy houses. So, I get to school after an infuriating car ride with Charlie, who insisted that she had the right to paint your nails. The audacity, right? She doesn't get that you're just not a pink and glitter type of girl, Bailey. Anyway I get into school and go to my locker, and what's missing? You guessed it. Where's Kate? I figured she was out or had to be somewhere else.

Well now that I was perfectly alone, I walked to first period, thinking that she would meet me there. I get in the class and found out she wasn't there either, so I waited. It's not your fault because you can't help it, but you're really warm and it's near impossible to sleep when you're in the bed too. So, running on only about 3 hours of actual sleep, the only thing I could do was try and get some more while I had the time. I guess people don't like the idea of me being well rested, because only seconds after I put my head down, everyone in the room somehow went half-deaf and could only hear each other through loud, ear-stabbing yelling. That was nice.

Eventually, Kate comes scurrying in, barely in time before the bell. She sat in her seat and before I could ask where she was, Ms. Brown decided it was a great time to start flapping her gums needlessly. I could've gotten away with talking 'under the radar', but I couldn't get Kate's attention. She wouldn't even look at me. Something was definitely up.

After 45 minutes of failed communications during class, the bell rang and Kate shot out of her seat and barely contained a run out of the class. I tried to catch up to her but she was moving really fast.

"Kate, wait!" I yelled down the hall she was escaping down. I don't really know what was going on inside her head, girl. She was going to be with me for the next three classes anyway and why was shy avoiding me in the first place?

After two more classes of teachers talking when they should know better and Kate ignoring me, I reached my limit. I walked into fourth period Physics near fuming and took my seat at the table next to Kate, vexed beyond politeness. My backpack dropped off of my shoulder with a thud and I turned in my chair to face Kate. I looked straight at her and she was trying very hard to make it seem like the blackboard at the front of the room was riveting entertainment.

"Kate, what the hell?" I huffed, aggravated enough to surpass my normal, possibly overly nice demeanor. I meant business, because if I was going to be ignored and avoided so blatantly, I at least deserved to know why. Was it because I didn't say anything to her Saturday or Sunday? That wouldn't make a whole lot of sense, because she has gone years without talking to me, and it's not like I say something every single day.

She reluctantly craned her neck to face me and plastered a nervous smile to her mouth. "Uh…what do you mean?" she asked nonchalantly. I don't know who she thought she was kidding, playing dumb like that as if I hadn't known her for forever.

"Kate," I growled through clenched teeth, breathing steam from my nostrils. The act was riling me further, but I wasn't going to take out all of my anger on her, though deserving it may be. I also was not trying to make a spectacle for the rest of the class' enjoyment. In a more quiet and composed tone, I continued "You know damn well what I mean. Why won't you talk to me? You didn't even meet me this morning.".

"I'm talking to you right now" she said in a condescending way that should have been followed with 'silly'. She returned an annoyingly placid expression, only interrupted by amber eyes with too big pupils and staring shakily. She was very clearly trying not to tell me something.

"Kate." I seethed once more, inadvertently cracking the knuckles, fisted in hands, balled up in growing frustration. She knew I wasn't going to hurt her or do anything drastic, but she finally tuned into the gravity of my demand.

She sighed, deeply and somberly, and toyed with her cuticles on her desk, diverting her eyes them sheepishly. She released another drawn-out exhale and said "This morning, I was…uh…with my boyfriend." she admitted as if it were incriminating. I fought the urge to recoil onto the floor at the news. I got the feeling that I had just teetered off of the apex of a rollercoaster ride, or maybe gone over a speed bump too fast, gravity deciding to take more notice of my stomach.

"Your boyfriend?" I repeated for clarity's sake. It very easily could have been a misheard sentence or maybe some sarcastic quip that I hadn't quite wrapped my head around, like I had feebly hoped, but no. She meant it.

She laughed a bit nervously and more squeaked than said "Yeah". She still refused eye contact though. Where did this guy come even from? This guy appears out of nowhere and all of a sudden, Kate's too busy to meet me like she does every day.

"Wait, what?" I exclaimed rhetorically. This all seemed so confusing and abrupt. Also, her admission seemed to have nothing to do with anything. "Well who is it?" I asked, trying to satiate my thriving curiosity.

"You know Hutch Laille (lie-ye)?"

"I think I know _of_ him. Year 12, right?" I asked cautiously. I'd never really talked to him, but I can match the name to a face. I didn't have any issue with him (well, aside from the one unravelling in front of me).

"Mhm" she affirmed to the table top.

"Since when?" I asked. Had she been flirting with me (or not I have no idea) while she had a boyfriend the whole time? I can't imagine the Kate I knew doing that. We'd spent almost every day together. I'd feel bad for the guy.

"I was at the mall with Candy and Sam after I left your house on Friday and he saw us and asked me out to dinner on Sunday" she explained. She did have a tone like she really didn't want to be telling this to me. At least she used the term 'boyfriend' loosely, but still, that Hutch beat me to her. I'll deal with that thought later. I needed to know why she was acting so weird about it now.

"So, why are you avoiding me?" I asked meekly, now looking at the apparently fascinating table myself. Did she just not need me anymore because she actually _got_ someone? Was I that replaceable? I know you would never replace me, girl. Anyway, I was worried that she was about to tell me to shove it now that she had a real man.

"Umm, Hutch was a little…concerned that something is… _going on_." She told me. Extraordinary relief aside, that is kinda an asinine thing to do, tell your girlfriend that she can't talk to the guy she's known longer than you, right? Talk about possessive. I guess I shouldn't be so quick to judge. After all, Kate did decide he was worth a try.

"Oh. So what does that mean for us?" I inquired further. I guess there wasn't really an _us_ anymore. We're no longer Humphrey and Kate, the sarcastic, smart-ass duo who doesn't really talk to a whole lot of people. Well, I guess that's more me putting out enough of that for the both of us. She's outgoing and I'm going nowhere. Obviously you've figured that out by now.

"I'm pretty sure nothing, but I figured hold off on the escorting me around like a bodyguard thing until we sort it out." She said in a nervous laugh. Glad to know that she wears the pants in the relationship huh? She will be eventually, but I bet she's just playing it nice for the first couple of dates.

This sucks. Everything about this sucks. The one girl, the one person, that was finally making my dismal life the slightest bit happy (no offense, Bailey) and she's gone. Some jealous, selfish douche comes out of nowhere and sweeps her off her feet. I shouldn't say that. I want her to be happy and everything; have that same smile and laugh that took me years to elicit regularly. I want him to be handsome, and nice, and charming, and everything she's ever wanted.

At the same time, I'm hoping that it crashes and burns in a big, flaming wreck. Does it make me a terrible person to root against a relationship? It probably does, but these are extenuating circumstances. I mean come on; I've been her friend for forever. I've only ever been good to her. I took care of her when she was sick and desperate, I fought of guys near twice my size for her. She was even my first kiss and I was hers. Granted, we were twelve and it wasn't particularly real, but it counts for something. Most of all, I did all of these things, not expecting anything for them except maybe a thank you and a smile. It wasn't to impress her or to make her fall in love with me, much as I would like that, but because I wanted her life to be perfect and happy; and knowing any part of that was being caused by me was enough.

I've never wanted anyone or anything as much as I wanted her. She's smart, and funny, and beautiful, and compassionate, and everything I could ever want, except being mine. Now, the jackass that she's dating tells her not to hang out with me anymore? What kind of shit is that? Do you think she is at all sad about it? Does she think it affects me at all, or am I just some puppy, chasing at her coat tails incessantly and only to be used when she feels like it? Has she only been spending time with me because she had no one else to talk to? She did go out on Friday without me. Then again, she knows that I hate going to the mall. It's so pointless, just walking around in circles, doing a bunch of impulse buying. Plus, she probably just wanted to hang out with a couple of girls for once.

Maybe this was just a middle school friendship that over stepped its limits, y'know. This was bound to happen. She's easily the prettiest girl I've ever met and someone had to take notice of it eventually. I should have made a move sooner. I knew that I wanted her the second I saw her in that hallway the first day of school, but no. I had to pussy out of it.

So if you thought that was awkward, Bailey, wait until I tell you about lunch. It was God awful. I walked there without her. A few minutes later, Sam and Candy come by and sit down with their food. I didn't feel much like eating and don't give me that look. Stop worrying. I just wasn't hungry. Anyway, they sat down and looked at me, but their mouths hung open slightly, as if they wanted to say something and were trying to figure out how. I looked up sharply at them and their lips moved slightly, apparently around words that did not exist.

"Just say it already." I grumbled as I turned back to my food. That last thing I want to do is skate around some stupid conversation that I didn't want to have anyway. Just rip it off like a Band-Aid.

"Did you hear about…" Sam started quietly. It was the same kind of tone that doctors use to tell family members that they no longer get to see a loved one. She didn't have a chance to finish her question, though it was painfully obvious what it was.

"Yes." I interrupted. A cold, steely frown had come to rest over my mouth and I allowed its existence. This was something that warranted frowning about. This was something that warranted pulling hair and teeth out and peeling skin off and clawing my nails at concrete until I wear them to nothingness. A frowned seemed good enough at the moment. With the stoic expression, I pushed the food I had so wastefully bought away, put my head on my forearms, which were crossed in front of me, and stared at the cafeteria table below them.

"You okay?" Sam asked softly. She made it sound like I was a three year old with a tummy ache. I wasn't sick, though I wish someone would tell my stomach. My only problem was that my ribcage felt like it was cracking as it tried to cave into my chest. I felt like I wanted to throw bricks high up into the air and catch them with the top of my head. Maybe a nice, long coma would be good. I could finally get some sleep and I wouldn't have to think about this mess or see anyone or talk to anyone.

"I'm fine." I said, muffled through my sweaters sleeves. Fuck whoever came up with that phrase, 'I'm fine'. What the hell does that even mean anyway? I'm not some china or neatly ground sand. I'm not some exquisite product, refined to exorbitant quality, and over-priced accordingly. I don't know what I am; besides fucked up beyond repair. Worst of all, the one person who could fix me, the one person who made all of this bullshit seem worth it, was now at the hands of a guy so conceited that he demands her life entirely revolve around him.

"Well did you like her?" Candy inquired. It was possible that they were just trying to help me, but I know that they're Kate's friends before mine. I lifted my tired face from the table and stared at her with half-lidded, bloodshot eyes for a few seconds before I replanted my head. It wasn't a cryptic message of body language. It told her how glaringly clear the answer to her question was and if she didn't understand it, I wasn't going to explain. I wasn't even sure that I wasn't even sure that I wanted to answer, wearing my heart on my sleeve so imprudently.

"I'm so sorry" Sam said as she placed an attempting to be reassuring hand on my arm from across the table.

"Yeah" Candy added delicately.

"I don't want to hear it." I replied shortly. "I get the gesture but just leave it alone" I continued. I don't need consoling and even more so, I don't want it. Sympathy is bad enough when I can't stop it, I don't want people patting my back and walking on eggshells around me. Just…like…leave me to my own, y'know.

I put my head down as I tried to pass the time with sleep and failing due to the thoughts zipping through my brain before I could recognize or understand them. The loud droning of the other impossibly annoying school kids who are too stupid and self-absorbed to realize that they're shouting at the other stupid self-absorbed kid across from them didn't help either. I can't imagine what I would have done if I had your hearing, girl. I definitely know what I would have done if I had your teeth though, and it involves the school needing a mop. *Sigh* Okay, I don't really mean it, but still, it's aggravating.

So my futile attempt at rest gets interrupted by close footsteps and the table shaking as two more members joined us a few minutes after Lily did. Thinking of how the numbers of our group worked out, I expected to look up and see Kate and Charlie, but nope, God has a vendetta against me. Maybe I pulled Charlie's hair once too many times when we were younger or stolen too many cookies. Either way, I know he hate's me now because I look up and I see Kate but with her, you guessed it again, _Him._ They walked hand in hand to us and Kate took the seat next to mine, and Hutch the seat one further. They claimed their places and looked at the rest of the group, minus a presently absent Charlie, and received stunned looks from the other three girls in return. They all stood with gaping jaws that silently said "Uh-oh".

Kate broke the ensuing silence with "Hutch, this is Candy, Sam, and Lily", pointing to the girls respectively across the table. Then she leaned back in her seat to give him a _fantastic_ line of sight to me and said "And this is Humphrey". He glared at me, which somehow went unnoticed by Kate and gave a nod that seemed to have in fine print 'This is because she is here so I have to. If she wasn't, I'd want you dead.'. That was a charming start to a friendship huh? He's a real swell guy. You would love him. He had a pleasant air of 'I have never been through any hardships in my life, but I'm going to be bold and cocky as if I had anyway.'. Just a neat person to be around. I curtly nodded to him and went back to my interesting study of the table top that could only be done with a very close eye.

Hutch completely took the reins of any conversation, talking about football games he's won, _amazing_ basketball shots he's made, and the parties he'd been to in a deep, raspy voice. It was a really gripping talk, had me on the edge of my seat actually and somehow, no matter what ever anyone else said, he always had a response that led back to talking about him.

I occasionally looked up to see the three girls that I was actually _allowed_ to talk to looking back at Hutch with some sort of interest, feigned or otherwise. Every time they saw my head pick up slightly, they would shoot a careful glance my way, to which I responded with returning to my studies.

My food had run cold and untouched as the stories grew old and abrasive as they passed through my ears. Eventually, I'd had enough and finally grew enough of a pair to grab my backpack and my lunch tray. I took the food and threw the entirety of it out, kids in Africa be damned. From there I continued to lonelily walk to my next period where I sat on the floor and waited for the bell. I think that's how I'd rather spend my lunch. If Hutch and Kate become a regular occurrence at previously _my_ table, then I'll find a quiet place outside or in some isolated hall to chill.

I wish you could be there, sitting in the lap you're too big for and letting me gently comb your fur with my fingers while I tell you about my day. You're a good listener. I should run to the store and get you some steak or something. You're looking a little thin. Maybe later.

*sigh* Do you think things will get better? I want to be her friend still and there's no real reason why we shouldn't but I don't know if I can. It'd be too much like if I dangled that steak in front of your eyes and then took it away, but kept it in my pocket to remind you that it was still there. I can't have something that I have wanted for so long and was so close to getting just _be_ there and mock my hesitation. I'll try and make it work, but I don't know, girl.

And before you tell me Bailey, I'm not crazy. I know you don't understand anything but my tone. I didn't think you were going to reply.

 **A/N: I have a lot to say so I'll do it in as few words as possible. I'm really so, so sorry with how late this is and how it's not as long as it should be. It's entirely my fault. I didn't get to starting it for four days because I was nervous about changing the direction of the story so much with this chapter. Squid84 got me started though, so thank him. Secondly, I didn't finish for a couple more days for a more serious reason. I just saw a psychiatrist and I'm starting on anti-anxiety medication. As much as I hate the idea of it and how much it is my choice, I am going to try it. If you know anything about the drugs, you know that the first week you take them; everything gets much worse before it gets better. Because of this, I am taking the next seven days off. I'm not going to write during the time, so the next chapter will probably be in the ten or eleven days from now. Please don't tell me that you're sorry for me or that you understand, because even though it is a nice gesture, much like my version of Humphrey, I hate sympathy. Anyway because of this, I'm begging you, that if you see a change in the way I write over the next few chapters, tell me about it. This story and you guys are really important to me, and I don't want any chemicals changing this. While I take a break, I'm going to be thinking of more ideas for the story and will likely be on the site every day, watching for pm's and reviews and views, so please feel free to message me your ideas or a review or just talk to me.**

 **Also, interesting anecdote, the review that at the top came in while I was thinking about this and it is from a brand new viewer and a guy who just made their profile and he said some really nice things. I almost cried. It was heartbreaking to think about how much you guys like this and how much that means to me.**

 **Sorry this had to be so serious. See you next chapter.**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	12. Un-Bear-able

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 12 _Un-Bear-able_

 **A/N: So, I'm back from the grave and with me, I brought another chapter for your reading pleasure. It's not the extra-long chapter that I wish I could give you, but it's pretty lengthy, so I hope that is enough for now. Everything is going good with me, and I don't feel very different (which could mean I need a little higher dosage because I'm a pretty big guy) but I feel good enough about this chapter to not worry about it being affected too much. I hope you think so too.**

 **Huge, enormous thank you to everyone who said something to me over my break. It really helped keep spirits up :)**

 **Fav Review**

" **I really like this chapter. Had me on the edge. I hope humphrey and Kate can have a heart to heart soon. I think they have things they need to discuss." –Kellylad13**

 **Very true.**

(Humphrey's POV)

(September 26th)

A little longer than two weeks after I got her, I had to start training Bailey every day. All of the lying around and definitely getting spoiled with a cut of tenderloin by me and too many treats by Charlie had left her…antsy. She was getting into trouble, figuring out intricate ways to steal food or knowingly shred my homework. Her craziness was also partly my fault. The unending talking into her ear was probably driving her insane, so we had to start working.

It started with basic obedience training: sit, down, stay, come. I'm sure she had to have known them already, but I think they were taught to her in German or something. The marines probably don't like the idea of any person being able to command their lethal dogs. Well, she's not exactly lethal though; unless, that is, you're a fly in her food bowl.

Anyway, I liked the idea of shorthand for her commands that only I would know. Basically, I stole their idea and made it my own. Instead of words that translated into actions, I issued sharp, varying whistles. That worked out really well. Although, sometimes she gets really confused and mad when I get a song stuck in my head for so long that it starts to leak out.

I walk her around town pretty often, making her go through all of the commands. It's good for her to get out and get some exercise. If she doesn't feel like she has done something for more than 24 hours, she finds something to do, and it is usually not good.

It was on one of these walks that I saw Kate and _him_.

They were walking around downtown. I don't usually go there because there are always a lot of people by the time I get home from school and take Bailey there, and there is always trash and food lying around that really doesn't help with the training. As if it were a cruel attempt at irony from somewhere in the clouds, I went down today on a whim, because it's a weekend, and I ran into them.

They were walking, sickeningly hand in hand and in and out of the small shops and stores. They had just come out of a candy shop, and if that wasn't made clear enough by the vibrant sign on the storefront, they were sharing an oversized, rainbow colored lollipop.

My heart leapt into the back of my throat, seemingly testing out my gag reflex. It wasn't so much the general public display of affection that got to me, as it was that _she_ was with some guy who doesn't give enough of a damn about her to let her have her own friends. I froze mid-stride and my shoes bore against the paved sidewalk with an audible scrape. Maybe if I had been the slightest bit quieter, I could have slipped past un-noticed, but no. God is merciless.

Bailey looked up at me and searched my face for an explanation as to why we stopped. I jerked my head toward the couple and she followed the motion. Her eyes widened at the realization and she looked back with a face that flatly said 'Oh'.

"Yeah." I muttered to her. So, because God is merciless, Kate caught sight of me.

"Humphrey?" she asked in disbelief. I nodded slowly and reluctantly. I doubted that there was any possibility that if I didn't respond to the name, she'd believe it wasn't me.

She handed the shared lollipop to Hutch and sprinted the few feet between us to wrap her arms around my neck.

I have to admit, it was warmest and most comfortable contact I had made with anything in days; and, for just a second, I could believe that she wasn't someone else's.

I did, however, come to remember that she was in a relationship and with the guy a few feet in front of me, glaring through squinted eyes and staring daggers into my neck. I might have been intimidated or more aggravated if it weren't for how he had that vicious look while holding a large, colorful lollipop in one hand. I thought it better to just ignore him to avoid falling to the ground in laughter.

Though I could care less what that guy thinks, I still didn't return the hug. He, at least, made it very clear that he didn't like whatever relationship that I had with Kate while he had his own with her and my knuckles just started scarring from my last fight. I wasn't going to rush head first into another one. At least if she asked me why I didn't hug her back I had the excuse that I was holding onto Bailey's leash.

The dog gave a curious sniff at the bare legs, left exposed by Kate's jean shorts and likely smelling like _someone_ unfamiliar. She squeaked into my ear when she felt the no doubt wet and cold nose on her thigh. She let go of me and knelt down to pet the offending beast and Bailey was trying to decide whether or not she still liked the person who was rubbing behind her ears. I whistled two brief notes in ascending pitch and Bailey promptly sat on her haunches.

"Are you training her?" Kate asked, rising from her crouch in front of the dog and smiling warmly. It took me a second to realize that she was talking to me and then figure out that she asked a question.

"Oh…uh, yeah. She's used to working, so she, uh, needed something to do." I answered nervously. It was pretty awkward to be around her after not talking to and basically avoiding her at every turn for the past few days, especially when the reason why is glaring at me a few feet behind her.

I visibly tensed and looked past her at Hutch. Kate searched for whatever I was staring at, and then realized it was her boyfriend.

"Oh." she blurted when she found the source of the discomfort. "Hutch, you remember Humphrey from school." she said over her shoulder.

"Yeah." he replied curtly. He scowled through squinted eyes, still comically offset by the candy in his grasp. Kate furrowed her eyebrows at his standoffishness, which she somehow must have thought was out of character. I've never even seen the guy smile while being aware of me.

"Yeah." I echoed, and then searched my brain for an excuse to leave, "So…uhh…I should get Bailey back home.". That's not my best work.

"Oh, okay. See you around, I guess." She responded, stepping from my path. She actually seemed pretty disappointed, eyes falling and smile dropping to a frown. I was probably reading that wrong though. When she returned to _him_ , I saw her giving a critical glance.

"Yeah." I repeated like a broken record. Short empty sentences seemed appropriate. I really just couldn't wait to leave and feigning interest in the conversation wouldn't help with that. As I distanced myself further, I could faintly make out her asking why he can't get along with me. She sounded a little peeved, and not the playful ticked off that she used to get with me, but actually annoyed.

Before I rounded the corner of a building to get away, I heard Hutch reply. "I just don't like the way he looks at you.". He was probably speaking louder than he meant to be. From what I gathered, he's a really 'heart on my sleeve' type of guy. If he thinks something, everybody knows about it. It's not necessarily tactless; more like blissfully unaware of how transparent he is. At least it's predictable.

I didn't wait to hear the next thing Kate said, but if I know her (maybe I don't, thinking back to the past couple of weeks), it was probably something along the lines of 'I can handle myself'. Stubborn independence is something I had to get used to very early on in our friendship. God, I feel like I'm at its funeral.

Maybe I just need a break from her. Yeah, a break. You would think that three years off would be enough apparently not. I just need to keep her out of my thoughts so I can focus on something else…anything else.

(9:34 p.m.)

Great, just great. I was lying in my bed, and I guess this is karma for swearing off of Kate for a while, but guess who I get a text from; an infamous succubus, who won't let me forget about her for even a single moment.

'I wanted to let you know that during the three years I was away, I missed you. I just thought that should count for something.'

Completely out of the blue, entirely unsolicited, and baffling to its core, that's what that was. When I first saw it, I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and hoped it was just tired delirium, but no, the real world defies logic all the same.

I didn't have time to pick it apart just yet though, I had to reply. I couldn't say nothing like I wanted to, because she would think I was actively avoiding her (even though I am) and I can't ask her about it because that would be rude and personal. I couldn't say I missed you too (even though I did) because that would sound desperate and she has a boyfriend. You don't just say something like that, especially when you mean it as much as I do. That wouldn't lead to anywhere good. So, I just replied instinctively, and my instincts lie in attempts at sarcasm.

'Yeah, I'm pretty great :)'

Immediately after hitting send, I wished for the ability to take it back. I watched the outgoing message meter taunt me over its 2 and a half second lifespan. Why, why, why did I say something so idiotic? Now I just sound like some arrogant douchebag. She didn't write anything after that, so she probably thought the same thing. It wasn't even funny.

Thankfully, I at least bought time to dissect that message. I mean what the hell? It was so out of nowhere and I have not a clue as to what she meant by it. I feel like I should be mad or something, her playing with my head like that. Was she just fishing for feelings? I really couldn't be mad if I tried, but that didn't stop the burning curiosity. Worst of all, I obviously can't ask her about it because that shows that I'm thinking about it so much. She probably just said it in passing. Hell, for all I know she could be drunk off her ass or back on those stupid drugs. Now that I think about, high Kate is a pretty fun Kate.

How was I supposed to respond, though? What was she expecting? I've never given her any reason to think that I know how to handle stuff like this and it is all so frustrating. She just makes me an idiot and that makes it really hard to be cool and smooth.

Bailey was in my bed, sensing the clear distress. She's actually pretty good at reading me for when something is wrong, but not usually a whole lot of help. I asked her what she thought I should have done, because an animal actually might understand women better than I do, and she just blankly stared her answer. It really wouldn't have seemed out of place for her to mouth 'just shut up'. I bet she didn't know what she was expected to say either.

She abandoned her apparent attempt at consolation when I muttered under my breath "useless bitch.". The dog ran out of my room in a huff and must've run downstairs because Charlie came up a minute later. Of course she didn't knock so that she could give me a heart attack when I finally noticed her head sticking through.

"JESUS FUCK, Charlie!" I exclaimed, my phone leaping from my hands and onto the floor. She snickered in the doorway before fully intruding inside, staring purposefully at me. "What do you want?" I asked cynically.

"Bailey asked for reinforcements." She joked as she moved to sit with me on my bed. I snorted derisively and showed my skepticism through squinted eyes. "So…girl problems?"

"No." I abruptly defended. "Come on. When have you ever known me to get all cut up over a girl?". She brought her legs, draped in loose pajamas and leading up to her tank top, onto the bed and I reluctantly tucked my knees into my chest to make room.

"Humphrey…don't bullshit me. You're not good at it." She laughed, staring cheekily and holding that stupid, self-assured smirk on her face. "Trouble in paradise? Spill." She commanded.

"Why in the world would I do that? To give you ammunition for an hour from now?" I questioned. I had to be suspicious of her motives. She's not really one to go around helping others, especially me, and this would be a strange place to start.

"Do you want my help or not?" She asked, poised to get up and leave.

"No! Why would I want _your_ help?". Since when is she supposed to be the supportive sister that I never had? All that I remember is her teasing me, stealing my stuff, and beating me up until I got taller than her, and she still does the first two.

"I don't know if you noticed, but I _am_ actually a girl." She replied. That was probably some sort of jab about me being unable to be aware of girls.

"I wasn't actually sure, but I figured it'd be rude to ask." I snorted. I probably deserved the fist, pounding into my foot.

"Fine. Screw you." She said calmly, rising from my bed and starting toward the door. At first, I was glad to see her leave. What the hell did she think was going to happen? Did she really think I would simply spill my guts after all these years, just because she sat down with me?

I let out a long sigh, which caused her to stop with her hand on the doorknob. I guess if I did ever want to get help in this area from someone, it'd have to be her. The only other girls that I could really talk to are Sam and Candy, but they're really Kate's friends, not mine. That just leaves, Lily to talk to, and I can tell you what's NOT going to happen. I can remember the last time when she jumped me in the cafeteria about Kate and the chills it sent down my spine. I shuddered at the thought.

"Phone." I blurted.

"What?"

"Phone." I repeated, pointing to the iPhone taking its place on the floor. Charlie grabbed it and returned to her spot at the foot of my bed, sitting with legs crossed and facing me.

She held the device in her hand and asked "What's your password?".

"Yeah, right." I chuckled. I took the phone and unlocked it, saying "How fucking stupid do you think I am?" and shaking my head.

"It was worth a try.". She smiled. It's a nice smile, but it's pretty hard to appreciate when it normally has a malicious meaning. It was a little cheering now and then though. At least she made me a little bit happier, not that I'd ever tell her that. With her, I have count small victories like that and mentioning it would ruin the moment.

I opened the text message app and the specific conversation with Kate and handed it back to Charlie. When she saw the last two messages, she laughed through her nose, no doubt at my dodging the conversation.

"You're an idiot." She announced suddenly.

"Thanks. Is that how you going to help me? Telling me stuff I already know?" I sarcastically criticized. This was definitely a mistake. There is going to be no living with her after this. I don't know what possessed me to think that she would actually be valuable. I must be finally losing all of my sensibilities. This is the beginning of the end. I did have the presence of mind to see Charlie her swipe her finger down across the screen. "Hey, hey, hey! What the hell are you doing?" I yelled, prying it from her snooping clutches.

"Gathering context?" she tried, more of a question than an explanation.

"Yeah, sure. Well now I know why your eyes brown."

"Why?"

"Because you're so full of shit." I snarked. "Aren't you supposed to be helping?". She sighed at the burst of seriousness and scooted a little closer to me.

"So what's your big problem?"

"I don't know what I was supposed to do with what she just told me. It just came out of nowhere. I wasn't even talking to her and then she says… _that_.". I massaged my temples in agony.

"She's got you under her little finger, huh?" Charlie joked.

"Yeah, I guess. Do you think she is just messing with me?" God I sounded pathetic. Kate's rooted herself deep inside my brain and won't come out no matter how hard I try. To think that a month ago, I could almost forget about her entirely. Something about the way she makes me feel like a bumbling idiot under her gaze is just so mind boggling, and even more perplexing is how I don't want it to stop. It defies all logic and reason and rationality, but I like being and idiot in front of her, because she likes it. She giggles and I'm not so much imbecilic, more like fun and comical.

"Is she the kind of girl that would do that?"

"As if I knew. Isn't that supposed to be your area of expertise?". Yeah this was definitely a mistake. This Charlie that is trying to help is weird to be around, and she wasn't doing any good.

"Well, has she said anything like this before?"

"That all depends on what _this_ is.". Exasperated, I fell back against my pillows and covered my tired eyes with my forearm. "We should just give up. I think this defies all explanation. You're a mysterious breed and I quit trying to understand." I sighed.

" _I_ think you should just take it as she had a thought and decided to tell you about it because you might have liked to know."

"That doesn't really help, but thanks for trying. I'm going to sleep. Just promise me you won't ever do anything like this to a guy." I joked, slipping off my t-shirt, plugging my phone into its charger, and wiggling under the covers of my bed. Charlie got up facilitate the process and moved walked to the head of the bed.

"No promises, but your welcome." She said as she turned off my bedside lamp leaned down to press a gentle kiss onto my forehead. I recoiled sharply and knit my eyebrows close together in a scowl.

"Do it again and I'll bite you." I warned her. She laughed it off and began to again walk out of the room. Before she left, I told her "And stop giving my dog food! She's gaining weight."

She gasped ironically and jested "I'm gonna tell her you said that.".

She finally closed the door and left me to my sleep, if I could possibly get any instead of obsessing over this dumb text. Now that I thought about it again, I guess there is a lot of sentiment behind it. While Kate was in New York, she thought about me. But what does she mean by 'I just thought that should count for something.'. Of course it counts for something. I must have been making her believe that I didn't care about her anymore. I guess I have been skulking away from her lately and never starting a conversation myself, but I never thought she'd be so aware of it. But she has Hutch now, right? What does she need me for?

O0O0O0O0O0O

(Kate's POV)

(9:30 p.m.)

I just got back from Hutch's house after having dinner with his family. They were a really nice, classic Italian family. There was a lot of really good, definitely unhealthy food and loud talking. It was a pretty nice time, but when everybody was clearing the table and washing dishes, he dragged me into another room. So I was 'alone' with him, even though privacy isn't exactly what I would call a 15 foot distance and half a wall between us and his parents and younger brother.

Anyway, we were 'alone' and he does exactly what you would expect him to do: sits me down on the couch and starts kissing me. At first, I thought it was just going to be a quick peck on the lips and then we'd watch some TV or something, but when I pulled away a little bit, he followed me with his lips. I went along with it, but before I knew it, his tongue was scouring my mouth.

It's not like we hadn't made out before, because we had (in his car, at school, and once right outside my front door), but this time it was kind of…aggressive. It was a wanting and hungry kiss and not entirely pleasant. He's alright at it, but it was a lot all at once. That was compounded with the fact that his hand started to slide from my waist, up my ribs. I drew the line when the tip of his thumb crossed the border into the territory of my chest.

My eyes bulged and I grunted into his mouth, grabbing his wrist and wrenching it into his lap.

"What's the matter?" he asked in response to the reaction. He twisted his face in a way that could have been genuine concern or just curiosity as to why his grope session got smothered in its crib.

"It's…I-I…nothing. Sorry, I just have to get home." I said, checking my pockets for my keys and phone and then getting out as quickly as possible.

"Oh…umm…okay. See you later." He managed to get out before I closed the door behind me.

I walked home in the frigid cold, at night, by myself. I should have asked for a ride. No, he should have offered one. Ugh…I don't know. What the hell was that, though? I mean his family was just in the other room and he decides that sounded like the opportune moment to spring a really touchy-feely make-out session on me?

By the time I get home, it's 30 degrees outside and freezing. I get up to my room and collapse into my bed. I must have been too loud, because a minute later, Lily is knocking on my door.

"Come in." I grumbled, muffled by the pillow that I was currently speaking into. She peeked inside to see me, face down in my bed. When I heard the door close, I turned over to face her.

"Soooo…..how'd it go?" Lily asked, jumping into bed with me. I folded my legs into each other and sighed, not entirely sure that I wanted to have this conversation with my younger sister who has a notoriously loose tongue.

"Why do you want to know?" I asked, trying to abate my suspicions.

"You came home all…flustered after your big dinner with Hutch and his parents. Plus, your lips are really red." She answered, laughing through the last sentence. _That_ Iwas just going to ignore. I need a better poker face. The one I have is too see-through.

"Hutch is…pretty forward. It's just a bit much and it's a little exhausting." I said awkwardly. It still felt a little weird to be having this conversation. Stuff like this has really never come up between Lily and I. It was made weirder when Lily's mouth gaped and she covered it with a hand, apparently having some grand revelation. "What?"

"You didn't!?" she exclaimed loudly. I don't know what the hell she was talking about, but I did know that whatever it was, I didn't want the rest of my house hearing about it.

"Sshh. What are you prattling on about?". I couldn't imagine what she thought I was implying- wait. What did I just say? "No. Nothing happened. He's just a little too handsy. Jesus Lily." I clarified. Did she really think I would put out after just two weeks with my first boyfriend?

"Oh good." She breathed, apparently relieved. "I thought-"

I held up my hand to stop her and interrupted, "Ah! I don't want to hear it. It isn't your business anyway, but just…no. Moving on, he was acting weird all night and actually since this afternoon."

"Well, what happened this afternoon?"

"We were downtown and we ran into Humphrey." I replied, putting my head in my hands. I hadn't thought about it before, but that had to be the real cause of everything. So what? Was he just, like, marking his territory?

"How did that go?"

"About as well as you'd think. They don't really play nice together.". They never have, truthfully. I don't see what the problem is.

"Ooh, a nice love triangle." She said, resting her chin on her hand and grinning mischievously.

"That's it. Get out." I demanded. Why did I ever think this would end well?

"Whatever." Lily said, storming out of the room. When she finally left, I went back to lying in the bed. She got me thinking about Humphrey. He's pretty much the exact opposite of Hutch. He's shy and funny and so annoyingly guarded. Hutch is easy to deal with. He's a constant and Humphrey is just…a wildcard. He does weird, unpredictable things and that does weird, unpredictable things to my stomach.

(Flashback)

 _It's the first night in New York and my first night away from home. I remember sitting by myself in my new room. All the lights are off and…and I'm crying. It's a little undignified and messy, but I am. I didn't want to have to go to a new school, and have to meet new people, and make new friends. I didn't want any new friends. I didn't even get to say goodbye to the one real friend that I had. Humphrey. We just_ had _to leave during the summer, when I couldn't say something at school. I got a week's notice and it was so full of packing and boxing and moving, that no one could take me to see him._

 _I remember how this episode started. I was getting through the last box of the stuff from my room and when I opened it, resting neatly at the top of my other belongings was a little beige teddy bear with a blue striped bow tied around its neck. I must have had it for years, collecting dust in my closet. I remembered not being able to throw it away, even having no use for such a toy. Recalling even further back, I knew where I got it in the first place, a familiar little boy on a fifth grade field trip to a museum or something, emptying his pockets to get his best friend a gift._

 _In a moment of weakness, I was shown a painful reminder of what seemed lost, and in no surprise, the fur on the head of the plushy became wet and matted in my hands. I caressed the soft, now damp fur of the animal with my thumb, between its tiny ears. It was hardly consolation, but it did at least give me something to keep me grounded and from forgetting._

(end of flashback)

Humphrey has never been anything but nice to me. He's never asked me for anything in return, and expected even less. He was just _there_ , and that's the thing he could be counted on for, being reliable and stable and exactly how I needed him. I don't know what happened to him, but he's different now. We're not like we were, and everything has changed. I don't even think he wants to know me anymore. He probably blamed me for abandoning him.

In a rash decision under a lot of mental duress, I made my mind up to text him and in two, short sentences, I poured out my feelings to the best of my stressed abilities.

'I wanted to let you know that during the three years I was away, I missed you. I just thought that should count for something.'

I held my breath after hitting send, hit with the sudden realization that I sounded desperate and needy and cryptic. I had no idea what he was going to tell me, although the prevailing guess was 'Piss off.'. A short while later, he responds.

'Yeah, I'm pretty great :)'

Even though I didn't know it before I asked, that's the right answer. That's the best possible outcome. Sweet, reliable Humphrey, trying to make me laugh, and it worked. I resisted the urge to tell him that yes, he is pretty great. He's the only person that has ever made me feel so invincible, so flawless, and so undeniably happy.

Humphrey, you're an idiot, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

 **A/N: Hopefully you didn't think it's too terrible, but tell me what you thought, especially if you did actually think it was terrible. Criticism is just as appreciated. If you were thinking it, the last two scenes were supposed to kinda mirror each other. Kate and Humphrey think kinda similarly and in my mind, Charlie and Lily are similar characters. I wanted to get this out tonight because I'm going to my friend's shore house for a couple of days and I won't be able to write. I'll be able to reply to pm's and reviews, but it may not be as fast as usual because it'll be from my phone when I get the chance. See you next chapter :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**

 **p.s. The idea for the teddy bear scene and the text message came curtesy of Kellylad13**


	13. Cold Shoulders

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 13 _Cold Shoulders_

 **A/N: Sorry this chapter is late. I had to drag it kicking and screaming out of my head. Don't get excited; I changed it to M because the language is getting pretty bad. It's a pretty sizeable chapter so I hope you don't hate me.**

" **Sorry I haven't been able to review lately I've had some. Issues but I am back and the reviews are too the end was my favorite part it had me giggling and now Humphrey thinks he's made an ass out of himself and Kate loves him for it. That'll make an awkward conversation I loved the last few chapters hope you can forgive me for not reviewing I'll be back for the next chapter" – wolfies soul**

 **I missed you wolfie :)  
**

(Humphrey's God Awful POV)

(Monday, October 4th)

There was a loud, obtrusive sound, somewhat akin to an air-raid siren, shrieking in my room. My eyes snapped open to place it, and were met with the accursed alarm clock that I had almost forgotten about until a few days ago. I had to stop waking up to the one on my phone; it was filling my head with too many thoughts, too early in the morning. I couldn't start each day with a reminder of what I used to have, or more accurately, what I thought I used to have.

I pushed a furry sandbag off my feet so that I could get out of bed. Bailey groaned at the motion, but adjusted herself to steal the warm spot that I had left. She had just put her head back down when I left the room.

I got myself showered and dressed, and went downstairs to see Charlie sitting at the table, eating her usual bowl of morning frosted flakes. She wore a pair of black leggings and a beige sweater, unbuttoned to reveal a gray tank top. She also had a black and blue striped DC beanie that she must have swiped from my room, but I grudgingly decided that it wasn't worth the effort to snatch it off of her head.

When she noticed me at the bottom of the stairs, she dropped her spoon into the ceramic bowl with a loud clank and called my name. She stretched her arms into the air in a silent demand for a hug. I complied, only because it was easier than getting chased around the house until I did.

I unenthusiastically shambled over to her and wrapped my arms under hers while she latched hers behind my neck. She reached pretty high up on me, as she was sitting cross-legged in the chair, my chin just above the hat and the unruly, brunette bangs protruding from it. My beanie was going to smell like her strawberry shampoo for forever, but I've eventually learned to keep my bitter, negative comments away from my sister.

"I like your hair like this." I told her. Not a lie, but not quite entirely sincere. It was done up nicely and it's a good look for her, but I couldn;t really care less about it. She squeezed me tighter and I could almost feel her smile against my collar bone.

She backed out of the embrace with bashful color spreading over her nose. She smiled sweetly; not the usual sarcastic or condescending grin, or the I-know-everything-better-than-you smirk, but a real, genuine, gracious smile that she only puts when I say something nice. Her hazel eyes looked up to me, but her smile fell when she saw my nonplussed face and bloodshot eyes.

"What's wrong with you?" she said, eyebrows knit together and a linear frown over her mouth.

"What? I can't give you a compliment?" I retorted, not so sneakily dodging the question. Screw her for reading me like a book.

"No, because you only give 'compliments' when you feel like shit. What's up?" She responded too knowingly.

"Just tired." I groaned, a complete lie. Trying to escape her telepathic gaze, I walked over to the steaming cup of coffee on the counter and pulled it to my lips. "Dad at work?" I said in a low, raspy, morning baritone. Charlie hadn't stopped staring at me, twisted around in her chair to look over her shoulder.

"He didn't come home." She answered. As she spoke, her eyes narrowed, somewhere between pensively and accusingly. She froze like that, gawking at me, for what felt like hours.

"What?!" I yelled, feeling six inches tall under her critical magnifying glass. She, surprisingly, was unfazed by the outburst. Instead, she slowly stood up in her seat and walked over to me in what seemed like a challenge. I edged away from her and leaned back onto the counter while she approached. She brought her face to within inches of mine, eyes scanning for something, God knows what, before meeting my eyes again, glaring at me like a cornered dog.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes."

"Are you sick?"

"No."

"Maybe you should just stay home. I can call the school."

"No."

"Is this about Kate? Because I can talk to her if you want."

"I'M FINE! Alright? Fuck." I roared vehemently. Her face returned from the quiet interrogation it gave me to something more neutral and she backed it away a couple of inches in response. My fingernails dug into my palms as I noticed the return of that wretched phrase. "I'm just…tired, is all." I amended it, still in an angry tenor.

I heard the sound of a large weight dropping upstairs, the click of long nails on a wood surface, and a deep, bellowing bark echoing through the halls. In seconds, Bailey appeared on our floor, alerted by the commotion and with a high, excited tail wagging. She looked worriedly at me with those too familiar, amber eyes and her ears folded flush atop her head, and then gave the same look to Charlie. There was a faint growl in her throat, but she was unsure as to whom to direct it toward as she looked between us.

"Easy girl." I calmingly said, holding my hands in front of me. Over the past couple of weeks, Bailey had shown to be very protective over our family, especially me. She even snarled and bore her teeth at some girl who came up to me on the street because she recognized me from class. In her defense, that girl kinda ran up to us and was making a lot of noise, and I was nervous too. Anyway, this dog has a very deeply instilled instinct to protect and I have no doubt that a lot of that instinct involves fangs.

I slowly crept up to her with knees bent to appear less threatening. When I got to her, I held out my hands passively and she sniffed before promptly licking them. Relieved, I rubbed between her ears, which flopped around, but came back to their imposingly erect bearing.

I stood up from my crouched position to get back to my coffee, but as I moved away, Bailey remained in the doorway of the kitchen with her tail wagging, still watching both my sister and I carefully. Charlie, thankfully, had enough common sense to let me handle the dog; because after all, she is mine and I definitely know her best.

"Charlie, come here." I told her, still angry despite the lack of it present in my tone.

"Why?"

"For once, can you just listen to me?" I asked impatiently. Jeez, sometimes it's like talking to a three year old. I gave up on my resolve to not say anything further when I saw Charlie shake her head. "For fuck's sake Charlie! She's not going to leave until she sees that everything's okay. Just DO what I told you." I shouted, thoroughly pissed off. That girl couldn't act her own age if it meant her life. She'd keep wrapping a boa around her neck no matter how much I tell her it isn't a scarf. Because she can't tell how big of a brat the girl is, Bailey heard me getting angry and saw reason enough to growl again, though this time more powerfully. "And you shut the fuck up." I hollered at the dog, pointing an irate finger at her. She cowered at the rebuking of her handler, her tail tucking under her body and her eyes dropping to the floor in submission.

"Don't yell at her!" Charlie commanded from the side lines. I don't know where she gets off telling me what to do about dealing with _my_ dog when she's the one causing all the problems. My knuckles cracked in their fists and I seethed through clenched teeth in rage. My brow lowered as I looked between the dog and the girl, both glaring at me.

"I'm not dealing with this shit." I announced, very annoyed, as I stalked toward Bailey, grabbed her (more forcefully than really necessary in hindsight) by her new, pink collar, and dragged her out the sliding back patio door to our fenced in backyard where she normally spends the day. Once she was outside and looking at me pitifully, I slammed the door shut and turned to Charlie. "I'm leaving. Either come with me and keep your trap shut or walk." I threatened, glaring at her through narrowed eyes.

She stared back, the lines on her forehead showing her clearly indignant about the options, but she eventually made up her mine. "Asshole." She said, as she trudged to the door. Mercilessly sarcastic as I am, I wasn't going to make her walk just because of that. Then again, she was probably testing me.

There was a stale silence in the car all the way to school. Charlie kept tight lipped as in my conditions. She sat with her head resting in her hand, her elbow propped against the door. She very overtly kept her gaze through the windshield, specifically while I was looking at her.

This was probably her equivalent of the silent treatment. Little did she know how that was more reward than punishment. Still, she was obviously upset, but I was not going to just apologize like last time. I had every entitlement to be angry…I think. She was pestering me though, and she must have known it too; and then she starts treading on dangerous waters, implicitly sore issues. She was once again inserting herself into matters far outside of her business.

When I pulled into a spot at the school, I quickly unbuckled myself, grabbed my bag from the back seat, opened the car door, but stopped with one foot planted on the asphalt. I looked back at Charlie who was _not_ covertly avoiding eye contact and waiting for me to leave to move, a frown affixed to her face.

"Sit there and pout for the rest of the day for all I care. You were in the wrong, _you_ crossed a line, and I'm not sorry." I told her. It was a little bit of a lie. I was kinda sorry that I was swearing and yelling at her and Bailey, but out of pride or some sort of stubborn justification, I wasn't going to just surrender the argument.

"Go to hell." She said in a huff, grabbing her belongings and exiting promptly.

I did the same and called after her, "Get over yourself already.". I'm getting tired of her self-important garbage. She's a snotty, little, brat monster and near impossible to deal with at any extent.

In an instant, she whirled around with puffy eyes and lip curling in fury. She took a running step toward me and gave me a nice, square punch right in the cheek. She's not a light puncher either. She didn't pull it or anything. It wasn't for show, it was a warning. I stumbled backwards, only stopped by my hand supporting me from the hood of my car. Hopefully, I didn't dent it, but I didn't stop to check.

"Asshole." She spat, clearing the hair that I had complimented but now stuck to her face and turning around.

"Fucking cunt." I growled venomously, pressing my free hand to my cheekbone and feeling a warm wetness there, coupled with a distinct stinging. Whenever Charlie and I got into it in the past, as siblings usually do, I always shied away from that word in my bouts of colorful insults. Now, it flowed off my tongue unexpectedly, but unabashedly. I wasn't going to take it back, despite the shudder in her shoulders as she came to a halt. It was the first time she had ever heard that from my mouth.

She spun around for the second time, just as angrily, but this time predictably. Just as she aimed another fist at my face and threw it, I caught her wrist in my hand roughly. Instead of punching her like she had done me, like she definitely deserved, like I _really_ wanted to, I knew my blow would be far harsher and just pushed her arm back powerfully. She was forced onto her ass on the pavement, flushed and embarrassed, but not really hurt. Considering the part of her on which she landed, maybe I should have been worried about brain damage.

I stared coldly at her, effectively hiding my own shame and guilt behind a stony face. Hers was starting to run wet with tears and small sniffles could be heard through the windy parking lot. We were both a little shocked by everything that just happened, though she more evidently showed it. I hadn't touched her in anger in a long time, and while she is always a little rough, it normally isn't out of any malice. Not only had I not gotten violent with her in maybe ten years, I had never been one for hitting anyone, especially not girls. It never sat right with me. I didn't let my disgust show, however.

Though I was technically only defending myself, and though I hadn't done nearly as much tangible damage as Charlie, I couldn't look at what I had done. Not right then at least. I was too angry. I stormed off through the newly forming crowds and into the building, although I did care to watch as some girl helped Charlie off the ground. So now I was definitely going to have a reputation as a woman-beater. Regardless, I cleaned myself up and went to first period class, distinctly early. I passed the free time inside my own head. My body slumped onto the desk while I thought about what in God's name I was doing.

School is a weird dynamic. It congregates a lot of people who couldn't care less about the reason they are there and spend every possible moment trying to do anything else. Seriously, they should just allow us to use our phones. There would be a lot less detention hours and fewer disruptions to class. I must have seen at least ten different kids get their phones taken away before lunch. Everyone else was either doodling in their notebooks, trying to keep their eyes open, or blatantly napping on desks, though I did catch some dirty looks and hushed whispers. The most egregious of the glances came from a particular girl, who looked more disappointed than anything, not that I cared what she thought.

It didn't help that it was a Monday. The school should really just give us half-periods on Mondays so we don't exceed our attention spans. I was one of the few unfortunate souls staving off sleep and the unfinished coffee certainly wasn't cutting it, so the first few classes were spent in misery.

The first five periods eventually crept by, though at a snail's pace. I groggily traipsed through the hallways, and under the haze of sleep depravity, was unwittingly doing laps around the school. When I came to finally realize what I was doing, I started toward the exit, outside which I normally spend my lunch period. Unfortunately, I had to go past the cafeteria. That's where Kate and her cult of new 'friends' spend their lunch, the arrogant little shits. Not Kate of course. Or…maybe. I don't know.

She's been acting pretty different lately. Since she effectively replaced Hutch with me, she started hanging around new people, a lot of them, wearing more than the minimalist amount of makeup that she used to, caring more about what she wore and how she looked, and she started playing volleyball. I've been to a couple of her games, though I mostly try to stay unnoticed. She's pretty good; might make captain next year. I only go because it's the only time I get to see her without awkward looks and silences. And she looks _really_ good in spandex volleyball shorts…not that I noticed or that it matters.

Anyway, it seemed as though she is starting to care about the whole petty, high school, social hierarchy and popularity bullshit that most other kids seem to buy into. I can't wrap my head around the need for validation by a bunch of self-absorbed, greasy teenagers, but I guess I'm not like most other kids my age.

So, Kate looked like she'd started to care more about what she looked like, what other girls were wearing, who was going out with who; the usual fluff. I often overheard her name in too loud gossip, things like 'Kate told me' or 'Kate said' or worst of all, the occasional things said about her. They mostly weren't nasty, but were some seemingly jealous or spiteful words sprouted her and there. Normally, I would be the first to jump to her defense, but not after what she put me through, stringing me along for forever, playing on my hopes for personal gain. I still couldn't hate her, but I sure wanted to.

As I was thinking all of this, I neared the open double doors that lead into the cafeteria, and more importantly that I needed to cross in front of. No big deal right? I just prayed to anyone who would listen that I could just slink by undetected, that I wouldn't have to face scolding and detestful looks.

Unfortunately, I am hated by anyone and everyone who might have heard me. As I walked past the entryway at a brisk pace, I hazarded a glance through. It appeared as if no one saw me or cared if they did, save for one, young, pretty face, partially shrouded by white bangs at my old table (now filled annoyingly with new people). 'Fuck' I muttered in defeat. I scurried away faster and toward the door that seemed an impossible distance away, but really only about 30 feet (9 meters-ish). Just as I felt the metal push bar in my hands, I heard a feint squeak of my name behind me. Trying to ignore it, I pushed through the door anyway and turned to sit along the brick exterior of the school building.

Seconds later and just as I expected, Lily followed me outside. She cautiously walked up beside me and I rested my arms around my knees. She spoke softly.

"Can I sit?" she asked politely, very un-Lily like. I scowled at her, though the expression fell flat on account of my tired face and weary eyes. It wasn't even worth the energy to be insulted by the air of sympathy that she was putting on, but I realized that she was only being nice. I nudged my head to the expanse of wall next to me and she promptly sat on the grass, back propped up against the building. I remained silent. "So…Mondays, right?" she said with a humorless laugh in an attempt to jumpstart a conversation.

I looked at her, entirely unamused. I sighed, aggravated, through my nose and said "Whatever you're going to say, just…say it already."

She sighed as well and looked ahead of us to the gym class running around the track. "Do you wanna explain this?" she said, pointing toward her own cheek.

"Charlie."

"Yeah. I heard. What did you do to make her wanna deck you?" she asked irreverently, more like the usual Williams girl I knew.

I huffed "Nothing."

"Yeah, and my ass is blue." She replied sarcastically.

"It probably is.". She gave me a disappointed glare, conveying a need for severity. "Sorry."

"It's okay. I've come to expect it from you by now." She said, broken by a small chuckle. Confusingly, the next thing she did was shift along the grass, removing the foot long gap between us, so that she leaned against me. I looked at her skeptically, but she said "Don't get your panties in a wad. You're the one who decided to sit outside in October and the grass is wet. I'm fucking freezing."

My hand moved to the zipper of my distinctly _second_ favorite hoodie and I started to pull it down to offer to the girl. "You give me that jacket and I'll make your other cheek match." She threatened, though a little bit nullified by her head resting on my shoulder. I felt pretty bad. I didn't want her to be freezing her apparently already blue ass off because of me and even less did I want her to catch a cold.

"Maybe you should go inside." I suggested. She laughed against my arm.

"As if you could get rid of me so easy."

"Can you blame me for trying, though?" I joked. We both laughed lightly, but it was cut short when she started to shiver. I drew the line when I heard her teeth chattering. She wouldn't take my jacket, she wouldn't go inside, and she was just going to sit there and freeze solid so she could talk to me. I was already feeling bad enough, I didn't need her guilt trip, subconscious or not. I hazarded to lift my arm up, shifted a little closer to her, and brought it around her opposite shoulder, which I rubbed in an attempt at warmth.

I looked at her face and saw her smile a bit, but her eyes were still covered by her bangs. She wrapped her arms around my chest and just sat there for a minute, leeching my warmth. It reminded me a lot of when Charlie and I were younger and she was much more manageable. She'd rip my head off if I ever told anyone, but she's a big cuddler too. The one striking difference, though, was the white hair that blew slightly in the wind.

"Hey Lily?"

"Mmm?" she mumbled into my chest.

"Why do you dye your hair?"

"Who says I do?"

"Your hair." I teased a little. It was too pristine a white too be a natural color. From what little I knew about hair and beauty products and the like, I at least knew that much.

"Is there something wrong with that?" she asked, trying to sound indignant but coming off as self-conscious.

"No, it looks nice. It's just that I've only ever known you with white hair and I was curious if there was a reason." I replied coolly. It did look nice, so I wasn't lying. In fact, it is very much a part of how I think of Lily. And she's a cute girl for what it's worth. It was a little hard to feel anything toward anyone at the moment, but it was hard to think of anyone the same way I thought of Kate anyway. No one compared to her. It's not really that Kate is prettier than her sister, because they actually have very similar faces and there is nothing wrong with Lily's, except the fact that it's not Kates.

"Thanks." She said shyly before answering, "I don't know really. I always have because I liked it when I saw some pictures of other girls, but it's just nice to be a little different sometimes, y'know? Like, sometimes it's cool to be able to stand out."

"I guess I get that." I said in return. It made sense, though I couldn't really care less about gaining other people's attention.

"Hey Humphrey?"

"Yeah?"

"You're really warm." She said, and I could see her smiling again.

"No, that's just my personality." I said sardonically.

"Maybe, but I'd put my money on it being how hot-headed you are." She joked back. I chortled in response. It's nice to think that I'm rubbing off on her too. "So…you didn't tell me what happened with your sister." She pointed out. I sighed. Back to being serious apparently.

"Can we not talk about it?" I pleaded, sounding exhausted.

She thought about it for a short while before she answered. "Yes…". I sighed once again in relief. " _But_ …" However, said relief was short lived. "you have to at least tell me why she punched you."

I reluctantly answered "She was mad at me from before and I kinda told her off."

"Come on. Details man." She prodded.

"Alright. She wouldn't leave me alone this morning and I yelled at her and then I almost made her walk to school. Then I basically told her that I was right and she was wrong and she stormed off, but before she got away, I told her to get over herself. Apparently that was enough." I admitted warily.

"Nice. Then what happened?"

"Didn't you say _just_ why she hit me?"

"I'm pretty sure I said 'at least'"

*Sigh* "She called me an asshole like she did this morning, and then I…then I called her a cunt."

"Ouch. You really are an asshole."

"Thanks." As if I didn't already know it. It was heartless and cruel to say that to her, knowing full well how sensitive you would be to it. But…but I still had the right to be mad about this, right? "Not my proudest moment.". Then again, when was I ever proud of myself?

"Sorry. So, that's pretty bad, but I mean…haven't you ever called her a name before?". She sounded sympathetic, which I'm normally rather averse to, but the warming hug was a comfort and the conversation wasn't the most unpleasant thing ever. Hell, not even close to the most unpleasant thing today.

"Yeah. We didn't always get along and I've said some stuff before but it was usually…specifically not that. It's a little crass for my taste, but it's been on the tip of my tongue before and I think she noticed me refraining." I said, a guilty lump forming in my throat as the words came out.

"So it, uh, meant a little more huh?"

"Something like that. Do you hate me like too, like everybody else does?" I asked weakly. I don't know why Lily's opinion mattered so much to me all of a sudden, but at the moment, it held a lot of weight.

"Humphrey, no one hates you." She tried, probably attempting to comfort me, but it was a bold faced lie.

"Yes they do. Charlie hates me, her friends hate me, Hutch hates me, all the kids who were there and only saw me push a girl to the ground hate me…" I rambled pitifully. "Kate hates me.". Shit. That last name was supposed to stay in the back of my mind, not come out.

"Kate doesn't hate you. Why would you think that?" she asked quietly. This was starting to tread into a bad territory. It'd be unfair to talk to Kate's sister about how she feels. She would know things that were too private.

"I don't know. I just assumed because she doesn't talk to me anymore. She'd rather spend her time with Hutch." I reasoned, feeling very low in self-confidence at the moment. I sounded so much like a desperate, jealous, friend-zoned guy.

Lily let out a breath and said "I told you before, I don't know what the hell she's thinking. Hutch is so annoying, though. All he talks about is football and parties and a bunch of other stupid, boring stuff and he's always making a show of kissing her in front of everyone or grabbing her butt in public. It's really gross-" she ranted. That is all a bunch of stuff that I really didn't want to know and is all upsetting.

I interrupted "Lily, I know that you're trying to help, but you're really not."

"Oh." She said, realizing her mistake. "Sorry". She pressed herself a little bit more into me, either trying to console me, or more likely just trying to make herself more comfortable. Then, she softly spoke. "I liked you better anyways. You're a lot funnier."

I blushed a little, unpermitted. I don't know if Lily had ever complimented me before that. In my usual response to awkwardness (at least awkward for me), I joked "Glad to know that my only use is humor.". I didn't fail to see the irony in the sarcasm, but didn't dwell on it either.

"God you're thick." She groaned, exasperated. I laughed to myself. Lily's a lot like a sister to me in a few ways. I grew up with her around, hanging out with Kate and I. She's a lot like Charlie too. She's pretty funny, speaks her mind, knows how to put me in my place…and I take her for granted. Well, great. If I didn't feel bad before, I sure did now.

"Thank you Lily." I said, grateful for both the compliment and all of the help. I leaned my undamaged check into the top of her head and held her close.

"You're welcome." She said sweetly. "And for the record, I don't hate you." She added. She then let out a big, endearing yawn. It was hard not to smile it. It was kind of like when you see a puppy do it. It's just…cute. Not the manliest of word choices but it fits.

"Tired?" I asked, much more soothed since talking to her.

"A little. Are you going inside?"

"No."

"Good." She replied, burying her head further into my collar bone. I smiled once again. She's a really good friend to me, and that at the very least earned her the use of me for a pillow for a little while. I spent the rest of the lunch period outside with her, somewhere between awake and asleep. My eyes were closed and it was restful, but I was still conscious, distinctly aware of the nippy autumn breeze, the slight warmth of the sunlight, and the feint sound of Lily's soft, napping breathing against my chest. What a sight this would make.

 **A/N: So Humphrey's kinda an asshole and Lily is adorable. I liked this chapter, but what do you guys think. Please leave me a review. It helps to know what I'm doing right and wrong. Sorry once again that this chapter is late. There was time at the shore house and then I had some trouble writing this chapter but I like how it came out, albeit slowly. Thanks for sticking with me :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**

 **p.s. This story isn't about abortion, though the title sounds like it. Just fyi.**


	14. Jokesters and Jackasses

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 14 _When Jokes are Enough_

 **A/N: Sorry I took an extra day. I was having a little trouble with this one towards the end. Hope it came out okay.**

 **Favorite review:**

" **Just when I thought my day couldn't get any better, I get notifications that you have updated. God I loved this chapter." –Kellylad13 (I have a soft spot for him if you haven't noticed.)**

(Humphrey's Slightly Less God Awful POV)

(Still Monday, October 4th)

Lily helped put a lot into perspective for me. I was still mad at Charlie, but I wasn't feeling so bitter about the day. Lily gave me her phone number, under the pretense of being able to 'call her if I need her', whatever that implied.

I spent all of seventh period history class thinking about what Lily had told me about Kate, though there were certain parts of what she said that I didn't want slipping back into my mind. She told me that her sister didn't hate me after I so smoothly blurted my most personal ruminations. I mean it made sense for Kate to. The only things we'd said to each other had been out of a common politeness, usually reserved for strangers. She'd asked to borrow my pencil earlier in the week and I passed her a couple of hand-outs, but never anything beyond necessity. On top of that, today she'd been giving me contemptuous scowls or something like that, bearing her disappointment in me.

It would be best for everyone if I just tried to let my feelings toward her turn into quiet indifference. No good came from pining after her like I did; though it felt decidedly more substantial than just a crush. I tried to push that thought from my mind.

I wanted to forget her. I wanted to think of her as nothing more than just another person in my class. I wanted to be able to move on. I needed to get over her, because she clearly had no real attachment to me, if I could be so easily removed and replaced. All of the sweet words and unsolicited, gentle affection and embraces were nothing more than platonic actions of an utterly fantastic girl. I mean…and alright girl.

A particularly bitter and cynical part of me discreetly suggested that she did it all for personal gain…or even worse, entertainment. The rational majority of my brain knew it was ridiculous, but once the seeds of suspicion were planted, they were not easily removed.

Eventually I'd had enough soundless torment and realized that I had to get out. I had to find sanctum somewhere. After the seventh period bell rang, I slipped out of the school and to the parking lot. It's not like anyone would notice the absence of the lonely, quiet kid that never talks to anyone and is usually asleep. Last period teachers are so lazy they don't even take attendance anyway. I didn't care if they did either. This was worth it.

I snuck into my parked mustang and threw my head back into the seat with a loud sigh. I just needed to be alone for a little while to decompress, my original intention at lunch (though I didn't regret what happened). There was a lot for me to think about. For starters, there was Lily. Why was she acting so nice? This is the same girl that vaguely threatened to out me to Kate and tackled me to the ground at their house. What is with the sudden change of heart? Also, that is probably the first time she ever hugged me, even if under the guise of staving off hypothermia. I guess that's not so weird and technically I hugged her first, but still, it was a little…weird. She is kinda like family, though. She and Kate spent so much time at my house and I at theirs that our parents basically became surrogate aunts and uncles.

So next, there was Kate. I didn't mean to spend a whole lot of brainpower thinking about her, but I did have to go over everything that was probably going to happen at least once. I basically resolved to ignore her, excise her from my life like she did me. I was going to see her every day and almost in every class, so I would have to make my peace with stinted conversations and uninterested glances. I needed to prepare myself for that, though I'm not sure that I ever could. Yet another ongoing struggle for my day. It had to be done though. Trying to find at least some of the same amount of interest and happiness in another person or even spending the rest of my years in high school in solitude is better than hopelessly chasing after her to no end. This I could come to terms with. I can handle it…right? Doesn't matter, that's what is going to have to happen.

Finally, there was the big shit-storm with Charlie. I just dawned on me that I was going to have to see her at home and the day after that and the day after that at infinitum. Fuck, I might even have to see her in less than an hour, expecting to be driven home. I couldn't handle that. I spent the entire day making extremely sure to avoid any place where I might cross her, even at the cost of walking in big, less than optimal, circular routes to achieve this. After all of that effort, the finality was out of my hands. I was going to see her; it was just a matter of when. I begged to any ethereal being, be it flying spaghetti monster or the big random number generator in the sky, that it wouldn't be for a while, that she would be so pissed off that she walks home by herself or goes to a friend's house. Anything but having to face her this soon.

This was a lot to have to deal with all at once. In actuality, it became too much. I got a headache that could only be deserved by a serial murder, maybe even a repeat offender of genocide. My brain swelled to an unbelievable degree, trying to burst from my apparently too thick skull. It'd be merciful if my head just decided to explode.

I tried to calm down. I angled my head backwards again and closed my eyes. I took a long measured inhale through my mouth and exhaled it nasally, trying to clear my mind of every perturbing thought or stressing idea, leaving only blank emptiness. My hand reached into my pocket and retrieved my phone. I deftly unlocked it without looking and opened the music application, easily found on the first page of apps even while blind. I pressed the 'play all' button and listened as smooth melodies filled the dead air. It's no surprise really that I fell asleep.

(Time Skip: 5 hours later)

I woke up from the nap I apparently took and immediately noticed a few things. One, the sky was black and the parking lot's hazy lights were on, so it was late. Two, it was cold as balls. Three was the stabbing pain in my neck and lower back, the muscles tensed by hours of sleeping in a chair that wasn't exactly made for it.

I looked at my phone, carelessly placed on the dashboard and finally noticed that there was music still coming from it. I grabbed it and as I turned it over in my hand, the lit screen blinded my dilated pupils with a searing accompaniment of pain. I shielded them from the offending device until they adjusted to the new level of light. When my eyes' straining finally ceased, I read the time on the phone. It was already fucking 6:37 pm and I had slept the afternoon away in my stupid fucking car. I addressed that fact with a sorted 'Whatever.'. I turned my attention to the new text message notification. I clicked it and a message from Paul read:

"Where are you?" –sent at 6:21

"Where is Charlie?" I asked imprudently. Obviously the flying spaghetti monster let me off the hook, as Charlie had not come to me for a ride. I would have to give it the appropriate thanks later.

A minute later, another message answered "Home. You?".

"On my way." I replied, as I started the car and fastened my seatbelt. I gave one, final rub to my eyes before putting the car in drive and speeding away from the dark, deserted lot.

When I reached my house, exhausted after another incredibly taxing day, I was reminded once again of the stiffness in my spine upon grabbing my backpack. The weight of it, while manageable, was not appreciated by my body. With a groan, aggravated by the entire world, I walked up the stone path to the front door and entered. I instantly regretted that decision because inside the house, waiting for me on the couch with the lights dimmed, was my adopted father, turning off the TV when he heard me come in.

He turned to me and spoke gravely, "I think we should talk.". It was less of a suggestion than it sounded. I knew what was coming, there was no way I couldn't, but that didn't make me ready for it. I sighed audibly as I set my bag down near the door. Bailey perked up at my arrival, but sensing the tension, left and made her escape to my bedroom upstairs.

"Just…two minutes, please." I implored, pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration. He granted the short leave with a curt tilt of his head. I trudged into the kitchen and to the sink, splashing a sufficient amount of cold water to allow me to be capable of conversation. After drying the moisture, though some still clung to my brow and the light stubble of my face, I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and downed it quickly. The frigid refreshment sent shivers along my nerves, reaching my fingers and rousing everything else along the way. I trotted back into the living room and slumped into the armchair across from my Dad. It was his turn to sigh, clearly just as unenthused about this discussion as I was.

"I'll start with the simple stuff. Where were you?" he asked plainly, trying to ease the shock of whatever was to come.

"I fell asleep in my car until I texted you." I responded, equally frank.

"Alright. So…um…how was your day?" He asked, skating around his real question out of discomfort. Great father as he is, he's not so good at being the serious, firm Dad most people have. I don't need that anyway. I looked at him through disapproving eyes, very aware about what he was trying to say. I leaned forward intently and my arm slid along my lap, joined by my folded. Only then did he see the now bruised split on my cheek, the full physical extent of the events of today.

"What did she tell you?" I asked, attacking the discussion head first, a distinct break in my pattern of coyness. The man gaped at the wound and brought his hand to my chin so that he could angle my face to see it better. When his inspection came to a close, he sat back into the couch. He obviously didn't want to have to say anything at all, but did so out of some moral obligation to keep his children at peace.

"She said you were yelling at her all morning and when you guys got to school, you called her a c-…name." he said, struggling for an appropriate euphemism to recover from what he almost let slip.

"And you believe her?" I said, calling into question the very blatantly doctored approximation of what happened.

"I believe what she said, but not as she said it." Paul replied with a small chuckle. I shared in it for a moment, but then returned to severity.

"Yeah, that all happened." I affirmed. I don't know why I cared enough to defend myself, it's not like he was going to ground me or something else you do to a child, but I did anyway. "I'm going to assume she left out the parts where she was pestering me since I first saw her today, how she stepped over all kinds of boundaries, how she called me an asshole much more than once, or the fact that she threw the first punch _and_ went back for more." I said, listing my own grievances with an admittedly smug and arrogant smirk.

"Mmm, she must not have thought those were relevant." he stated, sighing, not so much at my retelling or Charlie's actions, but more at the situation as a whole.

"Seems pretty fucking relevant to me." I snorted indignantly.

"Humphrey, language." He scolded robotically. I rolled my eyes and huffed derisively.

"Whatever. Are we done here?" I asked impatiently, itching to be anywhere else. Hell, I would have even taken being with Charlie. She'd probably be up for another fight, but I'd be ready to go another round with her. Next time she takes a swing at me, I'll put her down like a dog.

He coolly answer "No.", choosing to ignore my brazen rudeness. "Are you still angry with her?"

"Fuck yeah I am! Why wouldn't I be?"

"Language." He repeated, just as calmly as before. "I figured you had enough time to sleep it off."

"No. Wait, was I in a coma?" I asked sarcastically. Paul lowered his eyebrows and knit them together closely, outwardly showing his distaste in my humor. I ignored him and continued "What year is it?"

"Humphrey, not funny." He admonished. That was rich coming from him, who basically taught me my sense of humor. "I thought you two were actually getting along lately."

"You know what they say about assuming…" I started

"Humphrey." He interrupted.

"…it makes and ass…"

"HUMPHREY." He growled, brought to the edge of his tolerance for my bullshit. I stopped my snarky comment uncompleted. He sank back into the sofa, frustration cooling gradually. After some forced breathing, he continued, "So what did Charlie say that was so horrible."

"Nothing." I deadpanned automatically, not about to spill my guts right then.

"Was it something at school?"

"No." I responded quickly. He must have taken the lack of hesitation as a partial yes.

"Someone?" he pressed further.

"No." I answered just as hastily, gritting my teeth together in growing tension.

"Someone in particular?" he asked. I refused to meet his eyes and abstained from answering any longer. After the deliberate silence was recognized, he followed up "A girl.". That struck a chord in me. He was plucking nerves, just like Charlie was that morning.

"Dad, stop." I seethed; jaw tight against my upper pallet.

"I thought you were okay on that front. Isn't there something with you and Kate?"

"I said stop." I repeated, a fire burning in my stomach and only being stoked further.

"Did something happen between you two?" he asked. Boundaries were crossed, my warning had gone unheeded.

"I SAID FUCKING STOP!" I roared forcefully, the sound reverberating off the walls of the house in a buzz. Charlie was no doubt now aware of this pitiful excuse for a talking to and was probably very aware of the mistake she had made as well.

"Language." Paul said one last time, his lips pursed into a frown.

"No fuck that! You don't get to just sit there and berate me with your bullshit just like she did and then bitch at me for fucking swearing!" I yelled defiantly, standing from my seat in anger. My fist balled at my sides so hard that my fingernails might have drawn blood. Emotional wounds that had just today been closed now were being ripped of their scabs and treated with salt. He had to have been trying to get a rise out of me. How could he interrogate me like that after I had literally gotten into a fight earlier about the same thing.

He sat on the couch, stuck somewhere between disbelief and confusion and staring at me with wide eyes. "Fuck this. I'm not dealing with this twice." I said, turning around and starting toward the door. I didn't know where I was going, but I certainly didn't care. With my hand on the door, Paul finally found his words.

"Humphrey, wait." He called. My shoulders rose and fell with a furious breath. "Don't leave. I'm sorry. We're done."

I let out another hot, steaming breath, but I made my choice to stay, though reluctantly. I didn't look at him as I passed by and when straight upstairs to my room. I said a silent prayer to a certain pasta overlord because Charlie's door was closed and because I wouldn't have to stomach her passing glance. I stripped to my boxers, gathered my phone, and practically jumped into the warm embraces of my bed.

I spent several minutes trying to find some relief in the form of more sleep, but it refused to come to me. I tossed and turned and flipped my pillow repeatedly, but no rest befell me. I was still so manic with ire that it kept me awake. Suddenly, a desperate thought occurred to me. It was my last hope for any kind of respite. I pulled my phone put in front of me and typed a new message to Lily. "Can you help me smile?".

This would be the kind of thing that I would go to Kate for. If there was one person that could definitely bring a grin to my mouth, it was undoubtedly her. In a pinch, I hoped her sister could do the same. I had to wait a few minutes, but she didn't disappoint.

"What do Northern European churches have to do with Mortal Kombat?"

I didn't know she was into video games much, but I didn't think Kate was either, so I bit.

"What?"

Moments later: "They always end with a Finnish Hymn!"

And with that stupid, stupid fucking joke, I cracked the slightest grin, completely glad for the fact that at I hadn't managed to ruin my relationship with at least one person irreparably. It wasn't really the pun itself that cheered me up, but that I had a person to fall back on, to be there for me in the smallest way. All that I needed was that slight distraction, a meager act of kindness with no questions asked, to be able to find enough peace. Sleep didn't take much time seeking me out after that.

(Lily's POV)

(6:03 am)

I sat alone in my bed, trying to pass the time with the MacBook Pro sitting on my lap. I was mostly just watching old Disney movies on Netflix, but I found it very hard to focus on Tarzan's story when Humphrey kept popping into my head. It was more than just the fact that the loincloth wearing man reminded me of Humphrey that day at our house, exposed in all of his glory. I couldn't help but feel bad for him, feeling so alone and rejected. He said that he actually thought everybody, even Kate, hated him. I mean, she sure does have a funny way of showing it, but I couldn't believe that she would ever hate him, especially when he did nothing wrong. I hoped when he said 'everybody' that it didn't include me.

There was a soft knock on my closed bedroom door which effectively pulled me out of my own head.

"Come in." I said, pausing the movie that was just providing background noise to my thoughts and closing the laptop.

Kate stepped in and prefaced her entry with "Can we talk?". It sounded a little ominous, but it isn't very strange for her to spend time with me at night (or vice versa), either just talking or relaxing or the occasional, reassuring sleeping in the same bed. As per usual, she shut the door behind her, locked it, and crawled onto the comforter across from me. I crossed my legs to make room and she held her bent knees.

"What's up?" I asked, noting her slightly distressed expression.

"Nothing. I just…kinda wanted to hang out with you. Is that okay?" she implored, sounding uncharacteristically weak and more than a little upset.

"It would be, if you weren't lying through your teeth. Does this have something to do with Hutch?". She laughed at my answer, but shook her head in regards to my question. "Well, then what is it?"

She sighed before asking "Do you know what's up with Humphrey?". My eyes widened to the sides of dinner plates unpermitted. I tried to hide my nervousness. I left to talk to him, making no mention to the rest of the table. Kate couldn't have known that I did, so she must be asking out of general curiosity. Still, I'm sure Humphrey barely wanted to tell _me_ what he did, so he would probably object to me regurgitating it to Kate.

"Umm…no." I answered, choking on the words anxiously. She didn't seem to notice.

"Have you talked to him at all?"

"Y-Yeah."

"Well, what did he say?" she asked, growing tired of my stalling and dodging questions.

"I…I don't think he'd want me to tell you." I answered sheepishly. It felt like such a betrayal of his trust, but here was a source of one of his worries, rather pitifully begging for explication.

"Come on, Lily. Please?"

"No. Kate I…"

"Pleeeeaaase? Just tell me one thing." She pled, looking at me through eyes that just engendered urgency. I didn't want to say anything, but I was sympathetic to her too. She'd lost a friend just like Humphrey did. On top of that, she wasn't going to leave me alone until I told her something. I didn't have either the heart or the energy necessary to forge a lie. At least I could tell myself that I might be helping the guy.

"He said…he said he thought you hated him." I leaked reluctantly. She recoiled as if the words struck her on the nose. Her eyes fell despondently, but she didn't refute it immediately like I expected.

"Oh." She finally said. Hands came up to shield her face. "That makes so much sense. God, I've treated him like such shit. He probably hates _me_ now." She admitted, punctuating the last sentence with what almost sounded like a sob.

"I…I don't know. He didn't say." I responded, attempting consolation but failing in my lack of knowledge.

"It's all my fault. I might as well have been ignoring him."

"No, no. It's…it's not…" I said, trying to find the appropriate words to help and once again failing miserably. My pathetic attempt was thankfully cut short by my phone going off in the pocket of my pajamas. I pulled it out and on the lock screen read 'New Text Message from Humphrey'. "Kate, he's texting me now." I informed her, sliding the notification across the screen to open the message.

"What's he saying?" she asked, choking on the words a little, and I tried hard not to notice the puffy bags under her eyes as she looked up from her palms. The text read "Can you help me smile?". I bore a puzzled look and read it aloud to Kate.

"What does he mean 'help him smile'?" she asked. I shrugged my shoulders. "Do…do you think it's because of me?"

"I don't know." I answered honestly. It seemed as good an explanation as any and I would disregard it as a possibility.

"Well what are you going to say back?"

"I have no idea."

She seemed to have an internal debate for a minute, but eventually came to the conclusion that she should snatch my phone. At first I reached to grab it back, but she held out her hand for me to stop. Her fingers danced over the screen as she typed. A few seconds later, the ringtone sounded again. She started pressing the digital keys again, though the first message seemed longer. After she sent that text she handed the phone back. The text conversation seemed like a set up for some dumb joke about Catholicism, but it escaped me.

"I don't get it." I blurted, looking at the confusing riddle in my hands.

"Yeah, you wouldn't, but he would." She replied, the slightest smirk curling at the corner of her mouth. It didn't seem condescending, more relieved. She was probably really happy to have helped. We spent the rest of the night in my room, eventually sharing the bed until morning.

 **A/N: So, good? Horrible? What'd you think? Please tell me. :) Funny story. I pm'd squid84 and we were talking about our stories and I said that I was having a little trouble writing the last part. The way I said it accidentally made him think something terrible was going to happen in this chapter. XD sorry squid. Also, some people have asked questions in guest reviews. I can't answer those if you don't make an account.**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	15. What a Fucking Morning

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 15 _What a Fucking Morning_

 **A/N: AAAAAAAAAGGGHHH! I'm super excited to announce that The Value of a Life has passed 5,000 views and 100 reviews. Yay. And boy do I have the chapter to celebrate (not really). It's a little angry and not very happy, but I thought it was pretty funny too.**

 **Favorite review:**

" **Really liking the story so far (not as good as Getting to Know You sorry to say but that story is amazing), but I am really impressed with this one. It's one of the better high school storys, and to top it off the author PMed me to thank me for a favorite. No ones done that b4 so props bud and keep up the great work :D" –ryanshank63 (the 100** **th** **review writer)**

(Humphrey's Accursed POV)

(Tuesday, October 5th)

Another day, another morning of awaking to that abhorred, wailing monstrosity on my desk. Alarm clocks should come with ball peen hammers to bludgeon yourself to death in the mornings. That would be my marketing campaign. Or maybe it'd be more cost effective to just have cyanide tablets instead. With the logistics and everything, the weight of a full-sized hammer might be too much. See, I already solved the suicide/alarm clock industry's big problem.

So speaking of the desk with that shrieking beast of a device, I noticed the distinct absence of my phone. I looked around the bed, thinking that I may have fallen asleep with it, but no. As I searched through blankets, under pillows, and between sheets, I couldn't find it. Sighing and bearing a puzzled face, I sat back in the now mussed bed and thought about where else it could be. In the periphery of my sight, I saw the striking, light blue case of my iPhone 6 on the floor. I grabbed it, trying to think of how it got there in the first place. The mystery was solved when on the back of the phone was the stippling and gashing of teeth marks. As soon as that came to mind, I realized that in my rage-filled flurry yesterday, I forgot to take Bailey out.

The offending dog eyed from her position at the foot of my bed and ducked her head guiltily. She and whined pitifully and her tail wagged a little, hoping not to receive any scorn. I rolled my eyes in exasperation and scratched between her erected ears. "You really suck sometimes." I told her, though I didn't let up on the petting. She nudged into the affection. Off to a great start today. At least the actual electronic was undamaged and now I have a reminder of what waits for me at home etched into it. Thinking positively.

I got up and on my feet, before anything else could go wrong in my room. I got showered, shaved, dressed, the usual, dreadful, morning toil. I looked into the mirror in the bathroom while washing my face. My reflection stared back at me, cold and unmoving. Its normal azure irises were pale. The whites of its eyes had turned pink and irritated; red meandering lines punctuating the point of inflammation.

I splashed another spattering of water against my cheeks. Facing the figure in the mirror again, its skin looked sickly and almost clear. There were lines on its forehead and streaks at the corners of the mouth, forged after continuous frowns. The color in its cheeks and lips had long since faded into obscurity, save for a small contusion on the left cheekbone. Last of all, its shoulders, which could be squared and proud, were slumped, both tiredly and dejectedly. I looked down at the wet hands in the sink to see that they had had been getting rubbed raw by a leather leash and were forming calluses. Spidery veins on the tops were now more evident and showed the signs of weight loss. The fingernails were short, a product of an anxious mouth.

I was brought out of whatever critical trance I had been in by the slamming of the front door. That was a little strange, it being barely past 7:15. I sauntered down the stairs and into the kitchen where Paul was standing. I thought the noise must have been him leaving for work.

"Did you just get home?" I asked. He spun around to address me.

"Oh…uh…no. That was Charlie." he responded shyly.

"What the hell is she doing? We need to get ready to go to school.". Leave it to Charlie to be entirely irresponsible at the most inconvenient times. She needed to get back inside to get ready. I swore if she got me a detention for being late by goofing off, I'd cut holes in her shirts like in Mean Girls. Paul's expression turned sterner.

"Walking." He answered, making sure to give me a pointed glare. I guess she wanted to leave before she saw me this morning. I knew exactly what Paul was telling me, even if he didn't say it. He said 'fix this', and did it all with his eyes.

"Shit." I exhaled, dashing to get my keys and backpack. Everything she does seems to result in me having to do one extra thing, some other hurdle, all because she fucks up. Isn't she the older one? Isn't she the one who is supposed to come to me, to grovel and be the pacifist, to make amends? Why does this all come back to me.

"Language!" Paul called after me as walked out the door. I jumped into my car which is _thankfully_ frigid because I pushed my luck with the spaghetti monster. The car came to life and I almost wanted to apologize to it for making it get up this early too. I wished that I could just send out an amber alert for Charlie and be done with it. No, instead I have to go brat hunting for an escapee.

I followed the path that we normally take and about two minutes later I see the retreating figure of a tall brunette with a backpack on the left hand sidewalk. I drove down the road and slowed to match her pace, but she must have recognized the sound, because she quickly sped up. I accelerated the car just that much more and rolled down the driver's side window.

"Hey little girl. You want some candy?" I hollered. It may have been poor timing for sarcasm, but I didn't have a lot to lose by it. Was she going to stop liking me because of it? I'm already there. Charlie didn't respond, except by walking even faster. I rolled my eyes and sighed. She wasn't going to let my job be easy. "Do you really think you can outrun a car?" I yelled impatiently. That got enough of a reaction from her, by way of a solitary digit on her hand, extended in contrast to all the others. "Charlie, I don't have all day."

"Fuck off, Humphrey." She seethed, crossing her arms angrily. She really, really wasn't going to let this be easy.

"Charlie, get in this car! You're a fucking seventeen year-old girl walking all alone on the streets of New Jersey. Dad'll kill me if we have to pay for your funeral.". I was still lacing the little bit of genuine concern and the whole lot of frustration with hints of dry humor.

"I said fuck off!" she repeated venomously. She steeled herself and set her gaze directly in front of her, overtly disregarding me.

"Charlie, what do you want me to say? Do you want me to get on my knees and beg for forgiveness? Do you want me to tell you that I was an idiot and you were always right? Do you want me to say I'm sorry?" I growled rhetorically. She huffed indignantly and pulled the hood of her jacket over her head so that I couldn't see her getting upset. I know her well enough to read that from her body language. "Because I'm not! Can you honestly look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't do anything wrong? Tell me that you didn't walk all over my buttons. Tell me that you _never_ crossed a line that you knew damn well existed!" I commanded irately. It was too fucking early in the morning for her bullshit.

Her shoulders hunched forward resolutely and she turned her head away from me. Of all the times that she could possibly be so stubborn and childish, it had to be this early, this morning? I was so drawn already, I didn't need this spat. I'd had enough. The joints in my hand cracked as its grip tightened around the leather of the steering. "Charlie, I swear, if you don't get in the car right fucking now…". It wasn't an empty threat, just inexplicit. Either way, it went unheeded. My lips pursed to a line and my jaw clenched shut heatedly.

The hum of the car's engine thundered as I let the throttle open. I rolled the steering wheel sharply counter-clockwise and the car pulled halfway into the nearest driveway with a screech, coming to halt just feet in front of Charlie and cutting off her path on the sidewalk. She jumped back, startled, and exclaimed "What the flying fuck, Humphrey?". I ignored it, unlashed myself from the seat, and simply stretched across the interior of the car to open the passenger side door. Then, I opened my own door and jumped out, teeth gritting in irritated determination.

Charlie looked at me, jaw set defiantly and red-faced in anger. I still didn't pay it any mind. I was getting to school and she was coming with me. I no longer cared what she thought about it. I reached out toward her and grabbed her by the strap of her backpack. She tried to shake my hand off, but I held firm. With any escape of hers thwarted, I pulled her to me and with a grunt, hefted her by the waist onto my shoulder (with some difficulty on account of my slender frame, but thankfully, she has her own).

She screamed her distaste with the action and flailed viciously, pounding into chest and back with both knees and fists. I nearly stumbled onto the pavement as she thrashed around, but caught my balance for long enough to make it to the other side of the car. I let her off my shoulder roughly, so much so that she faltered a bit in her footing. When she came to stand, I had her trapped between myself, the open door, and the car itself.

"Let me go!" she demanded, giving me an insolent shove to my torso. I was steadfast in my resolve to stand there until she got in. I said nothing, aside from the volumes my unmoving glare spoke. She tried to slip past but I impeded any motion with a step to my right or left. She then tried to go through me, beating on my chest like a drum until I held onto her wrists. I had gained enough control to not bruise them, but my grasp was solid.

In a desperate attempt to be released, she brought her elbow up and with it, caught my lower lip, splitting it open. My hands flew up to brace the injury, and suddenly a blunt pain was forced into my stomach. It was the second time she landed a good punch on me in two days, but this time, much, much harder. My lungs refused to hold any air as I doubled over. I fell to my knees and my palms held me up from the grass of somebody's lawn. She huffed victoriously as I strained for breath. I writhed in pain, it seeming as if she put a hole straight through my diaphragm.

Her cackling eventually came to a halt when she decided to continue her walking. She strode a few steps down the sidewalk, before curiosity got the better of her. She glanced over her shoulder with a smirk, but then gasped in horror as I wretched the sparse contents of my stomach onto the grass, wheezing as I breathed. She spun on her heal and came running over to crouch at my side. My guts convulsed and burned as I barely felt the small hand, placed gingerly on my back.

"My God, Humphrey! I'm so sorry." I faintly heard as I heaved another round of vomit onto the greenery. I'd hate to be the poor guy who owns that property. "Hold on. I'll call an ambulance.". At that, I shook my head and coughed profusely as my respiratory system tried to return to functionality. "No? What about Dad? The school?" She continued, all receiving the same answer. "What should I do?"

I waved her toward me as I sat down, grimacing through the pain the contortion caused me. She followed the instruction cautiously, as though thinking I'd hit her as soon as she got close. When she did get into my reach, I wrapped my arm over her shoulder and tried to stand, the muscles in my abdomen loudly voicing their protests. She understood my point and helped me up and over to the car. I sat in the passenger seat to regain my breath and nudged my head to the seat next to me.

Charlie nodded and hurried around the car to take her place in the driver's seat. She sat and stared at me with concerned, hazel eyes that were hedging on tears. She started "Humphrey, I…" her words catching in her throat with a dry sob. She stopped midsentence as I held up my hand.

After series of inhales and exhales which gradually evened, I tried to speak. "I'm…okay. Take me…to school.". My throat was ragged and hoarse and my voice more so, but the words came out clear enough.

"I really think you should go home, because…" she said in a rushed, worried tone.

"Charlie…drive." I interrupted once more. She nodded again and made no further argument. She took off her backpack, threw it to the back seats, and strapped herself in. We rode to school with a pregnant silence in the car, apart from my haggard breaths, which eventually returned to normal, and the few sniffles from the right of me. I definitely didn't notice that she wiped some tears from her eyes a few times along the way.

We pulled into our usual spot, though unusually early. That gave us time to talk. As soon as I heard the stick shift into park, I turned to Charlie and weakly asked, "Do you have any water?". The speech was strained and unpleasant to my own ears, so I can't imagine what it sounded like in her guilt-ridden ones. She twisted to reach into her bag and grab a bottle, which she offered to me. I snapped open the cap and pushed it back into her hands. She looked at me strangely, but I know very well how dry her throat must've been after all the yelling and crying. I looked her in the eyes beseechingly and only then did she take the water and sip from it, before she returned both the bottle and the look. I obliged and finally rid my tongue of the taste of bile.

Now I felt apt to make conversation, but Charlie beat me to it. "Humphrey, I am so, so sorry. I-I…I didn't think…I was just so mad and I…I didn't mean to." She stuttered, tears trying to come around for another pass through her eyes.

"Stop. Don't say you're sorry." I said, placing a hand over the upturned one in her lap. Her fingers closed around mine and when she turned to look at them, I felt drops on my knuckles.

She turned back and sobbed "But I am! Look at what I did to you."

"Come on. I deserved it. You called it right; I am an asshole." I chuckled, although that really fucking hurt. Her weeps broke with a laugh, but only for a moment. I clutched her tighter. "And you think _you_ were angry? God, I wanted to hit you so bad." I joked, trying to make light of the situation to the best of my abilities. It got another snort.

"But you didn't and I did, because I'm a total bitch." She admitted shamefully.

"Well of the two of us, I think I have all the self-control." I said sarcastically, earning yet another chortle. "And I don't think you're a bitch. In fact, if you're any kind of animal, it's probably something stupid like a flamingo.". That time she openly smiled, even with the water in the corners of her eyes.

"You're really fucking dumb, you know that?" She interjected and we both laughed, though I clutched what was probably now a bruise.

"Yeah, but you like it." I teased one last time before sighing. "Listen, we both fucked up, agreed?". She nodded as she looked down to avoid my gaze. I pulled her chin up with my free hand and made her meet my eyes. "And we both still love each other, right?". She nodded once again and whispered affirmatives, but her smile twitched with hints of somberness. "And will you wait for me to take you to school from now on?"

"Buy me lunch?" she asked with big, pleading eyes, the little shit.

"Deal." I sighed reluctantly. "So, let's get inside so I can get cleaned up." I suggested, stretching out my shirt to draw attention to the red splotches from the cut on my lip that marred my gray t-shirt. "Do you think it will wash out?" I added wryly.

Her smile widened and she said "Like really, really fucking stupid.". I shared the grin and allowed her the use of the rearview mirror to preen herself. This seemed like the absolute perfect time to unveil the surprise that I kept in my glove compartment since the last fiasco in my car with Charlie. I opened it and took out a plastic bag from the local pharmacy. "What's that?" she asked. She really couldn't be patient for two fucking seconds for me to show her? Talk about ungrateful. Rather than answer, I handed it to her and out she pulled mascara, blush, foundation, a couple nail polish bottles, make up pads, and some weird fucking pencils, all copies of the same ones that she (very annoyingly I might add) leaves on the bathroom counter. I tried not to see the lines of mascara that trailed from her eyes from all of the commotion.

"Go ahead. Say it: I'm the greatest." I boasted playfully. She gave my arm a light smack, this time definitively deserved. "You bum rides from me so much, I figured you could have some stuff in my car.". Somewhere amongst what sounded like criticism was me being nice. I was hiding it though.

"Thank you." She responded dutifully and planted a soft peck on my cheek.

"You're gonna make me throw up again." I responded, too proud to be shown such sappy affection.

"That's not funny." She said, apparently offended. I shrugged it off because I just gave her like fifty bucks worth of make-up. The least the little twerp could do is be grateful.

After about ten more minutes of grooming, she deemed herself ready to be seen in public. It all seemed like too much effort to me, but whatever. Women; I've given up trying to understand them. In stark contrast to her, I checked the side-view mirror for a moment to make sure my lip stopped seeping and that there wasn't any blood actually on my face. After that was no longer in question, I stepped out of the car and walked with a still pretty emotional, but now in a better way, sister, around whom I hung an arm. It was somewhere between giving her a hug and using her as a crutch.

We walked together, for once, to my locker, where there were other teenage girls I knew. At the space, stood Kate, who was thankfully lacking a boyfriend at the moment, Lily, Sam, and Candy. Those four were the core of their social circles, the tightest knit. I started to regret the letters of my last name and how they tortured me with their similarity to the Williams sisters'. Sam and Candy were facing us, so they alerted the other two to our presence. My salutation to them was a curt flick of the chin and they returned it.

"Hey guys." I said, trying to get any awkward formalities out of the way as quickly as possible. I unraveled myself from Charlie as I opened the locker.

"Hey Humphrey." Lily replied, and she was the only one. Kate looked to the ground almost sadly (probably wishing Hutch was here instead of me) and the other two just looked uncomfortable. I hadn't really talked to any of them in a while, so maybe that was warranted. I tried to ignore all of that.

I put my backpack on a hook on the inside and tried to not be self-conscious as I took my shirt off in front of all those girls, but I couldn't hide the blush spreading off my neck and up my face. I did my best to seem like I didn't care and focused on getting the shirt I intended for gym out of my bag (and absolutely not the fact that I might have seen Kate blush too). None of them made any mention of it, except for the ever irreverent Lily. When I lifted up my arm to reach inside, I exposed, to those paying attention, the softball-sized, purple bruise just below my sternum.

"Jesus, Humphrey! Again?" the white-haired girl said, coming forward to rest an inconsiderate hand against the sore discoloration.

"OWWW! Fuck, Lily!" I howled, as I swatted her hand away and pulled the new, white shirt over my head. "And what do you mean again?". She glared at me as if the answer was incredibly obvious.

"What does the other person look like this time?" she asked cynically. Does every woman I know think she can be my mother? There must be something wrong with me that I attract them.

"I don't know. She's probably a four out of ten." I said sarcastically, pointing a thumb over my shoulder to Charlie, who wasted no time in hitting the back of my head. I snickered to myself as I pulled out a hoodie and adorned it.

"You did that?" The smaller girl asked my sister.

"Yeah, I have to keep my hoes in line somehow." She joked. Great, now she's acting like my sister, my mother, _and_ my pimp. Her comment even elicited a giggle from the other three women present. Charlie's like a fucking queen bee at this school. It's ridiculous.

"Alright, I'm going to leave before I get made fun of some more." I said, taking my backpack out and closing the locker door.

"K." Charlie acknowledged, giving me a sort of weird fist bump for seemingly no reason, but I guess it means she's definitely not pissed off anymore.

"See you later Humphrey.". I hoped that meant that Lily was going to hang out with me at lunch like yesterday. It was something I could get used to. I nodded to her and started down the hall, not expecting anything from the others who still had yet to address me. An unmistakable voice did say something, barely a squeak really.

"Bye Humph." Kate said, softly and probably unsure as to how I'd react. She probably didn't expect me to freeze in my stride. Panic set in pretty quickly. I mean, what was I supposed to do? I was kinda glad that she didn't say anything to me before. It made the encounter not entirely as painful. But now she said a sweet, passing goodbye that I only just barely caught. I remembered what I had resolved to show her, just polite indifference.

I craned my head over my shoulders and gave her my best, fake smile. "Bye Kate.". Once I got the words out, I high-tailed it to the next class. That was probably the scariest moment of my life. If any of them had seen my face when she finally said something, they would know what true terror looks like. I had to calm down. At least that went pretty well. Who knows, maybe I'll get pretty good at it by the eight time I do it today. What a fucking morning.

 **A/N: A whole lot of angsty goodness. At least there is one conflict resolved. Humphrey and Charlie's relationship is mended, but fragile. So was this chapter alright? I know it was a little angry and also a little violent, which is a bit of a departure from the usual, but that could be okay. Before I sat down to write this chapter, I actually had no idea that any of this was going to happen. It was not at all planned out like this. It's weird how winging it works out sometimes. :)**

 **-Nick (Ncham9)**


	16. More Morning Madness

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 16 _More Morning Madness_

 **A/N: Hey guys. I'm late, and no I'm not pregnant. I took a few days longer to write this chapter. I can't say that I was busy or that I was sick (although you could make an argument for that one). I'm still adjusting my meds and a consequence of that is that I was constantly second guessing myself and getting intensely frustration. So, long story short, I took a few more days to get in the right mood. Also I'm a bit of a procrastinator. Can't blame that on Escitalopram.**

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" **Don't ever stop writing this. It's too good to stop. This must go on." –Dark-Grey-Wolf**

" **You never fail to amaze me. Nick, I love you and this amazing story you have created. I'm proud to have inspired such an amazing individual." –Kellylad13**

(Humphrey's Despicable POV)

(Thursday, October 28th)

This morning was one that I felt would be properly addressed by an ill-tempered groan. Through the window, I could see the early autumn fog setting in on the horizon. It set the mood perfectly for a fantastically dreary day.

After I got ready, Bailey marched beside me downstairs, pacing stiffly on my left. Her heavy gait, heavier breathing, and constant jingle of her tags announced our presence. As soon as we made it to the bottom floor, the dog scampered off into the kitchen, where some revolting cooing and squealing occurred. Okay, think positively today. That shouldn't be too hard to manage. It couldn't be…right?

So…postives. Well, for starters, it smelled delicious in the house, for whatever reason. Charlie was happy, as per usual, so that is…nice, I guess. I don't have any tests today, also good. There wasn't any homework for me to forget last night, even better. Then again, I'm still up at 7:30 in the morning, and I'm still going to school, and I'm still _me_ and all the implied wretchedness in that. Positivity might just not be for me. I can manage long enough for my sister's sake, though.

"Morning, Charlie." I greeted cheerfully, despite the malcontented churning of my innards.

"Morning, Humph!" She answered, meeting and then surpassing my perceived enthusiasm. She beamed an apparently ecstatic smile and I can't even speculate as to why. I was a little jealous for a moment. I didn't understand how a person can function this early in the morning, but as much as I wanted her ease of getting out of bed, no thought was more disgusting than actually _being_ Charlie. That must be awful. I think I'll count my blessings and just stick with sad, old me. Upon my entry into the room, Bailey left to go lay down on the couch.

"So what's that smell?" I asked, walking over to the flat out amazing cup of coffee on the counter. The girl is just manipulating me into being happier.

"I don't know. What does it smell like?" she mocked as she jumped to sit on the counter. Okay, so it can't be that, she's too annoying. Sometimes it gets really hard to tell if she is playing dumb or not. I wasn't going to let my bitterness take over just yet.

"Something sweet." I said, deadpanning her snide comment.

"Hmm…" she droned, feigning contemplation. "That'd probably be the cookies in the oven then."

"Yeah? Did Dad make 'em?" I asked, tasting the coffee and deciding it needed more milk. I'd have to add it while Charlie wasn't looking; she'd take offense by it.

"No, I did." She responded with a proud smirk and hopped down to peek into the oven. I took that chance to conduct the misdeed. She adorned cooking mitts and stuck a toothpick in an unfortunate treat to gauge its readiness. Deeming it done, she took the tray out of the oven and set it on the stove top.

"Yeah, right. The house isn't on fire." I snarked, quickly returning to my previous spot to avoid suspicion.

"You just talked yourself out of any, mister." Charlie huffed, resealing the appliance and turning around to glare at me.

"Like you could stop me." I guffawed, feeling oddly playful all of a sudden. She threw off the safety-wear and held her hands out in front of her, grinning arrogantly. She stood between me and the sweets. Challenge accepted.

I casually strolled over to her, but when I tried to reach past her, she swatted my hand. I quickly tried the other, but it yielded the same response. Wishful thinking, I know. Seeing the pattern, I jerked my right arm, but while she anticipated another attempt to stretch for the prize, I baited out her attack and snatched her wrist. Her right came over to try and free the other, but it too was quickly grabbed. I smirked victoriously as I wrenched her arms behind her back and tried to hold them both in one hand, sealing the triumph. Just as I was about to get them both in its grasp, she perked her chin up and touched her wet, glossy lips to mine for a mere instant.

"What the fuck!" I howled, jumping back and spitting profusely. What in God's name would possess to do that? Where does she get off kissing me with her gross, slimy mouth?

"Stop being a baby. I've kissed you before." She said, grinning contentedly at my reaction.

"Not on the fucking mouth!". I thought I was going to be ill with the knowledge of what her peach lip gloss tastes like. I wiped the residue from my skin with my hand and screwed my eyes shut in revulsion.

"Grow up. Haven't you ever been kissed on the lips?" she scoffed flippantly. I have no idea why she is so insistent on fucking with me.

"Not by my _sister._ "

"Oh yeah? Then who?"

"None of your business who." I hissed, dodging the question and returning to the now lukewarm drink to wash away the horridly fruity taste. I don't think they make coffee strong enough to mask the memory though. Maybe whiskey would work. Eh, I'm not much for drinking. I sat down at the kitchen table to try and enjoy what amounted to my intoxication.

"I'm not convinced. I still think you have virgin lips." She mocked, scraping the cooled cookies onto a plate and bringing them over.

"That's the end of this conversation."

"I'll stop if you tell me who."

I groaned into the wood of the table. How does she have the energy to pester me this much so early? I can't keep up with her. "Fine. It was Kate. Happy?". She brought over the pile of a dozen chocolate chip delights and sat down across from me.

"Figures. Can't say I'm surprised." She responded, sitting on her leg for reasons that seem to be so that she doesn't feel shorter than me. She leaned onto her forearms toward me predatorily. She was fishing for a reaction.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I said, squinting my eyes cynically. I wasn't going to let her play me like a fool. I had to keep level.

"Just that you've had a crush on her for forever." She teased. Yup, definitely trying to get a rise.

"I have not." I responded coolly, taking another sip to hide my grin. This was a mental game of chess. I just have to wait her out.

"Yeah, you have.". She made no such attempts to quell her cheeky smirk.

"I guess we'll just have to disagree.". Charlie's not stupid. She knows exactly what she is doing, the conniving little snake.

"Maybe. Or, you could just admit it."

"Nah. I'll stick with disagreeing."

"Hmph." She snorted. "So how'd it happen?"

"Why do you care so much?"

"Because you're my baby brother. It's my job to."

I sighed and looked her straight in the eyes, pointedly ignoring her inflammatory choice of words. "You're not going to leave me alone until I tell you about it, are you?" I asked. I pinched the bridge of my nose and groaned again when I saw her nod. I took a few seconds to figure out how I could say it without rousing suspicion of anything. "We were in seventh grade, she was curious, and I was her best friend.". Concise and emotionless, as intended.

"Oh. One of those, huh?"

"Yeah, whatever 'those' are." I answered with a grumble. My head was starting to feel more weighted, so I set it down in clear agitation.

"What kinda kiss was it?". I looked up to give her a perplexed look, which she rolled her eyes at. "Open mouth? Closed mouth? How long? Come on." she quizzed me, as if I could remember.

"Open…I think. Why's it important?"

"Because. How long?". That really isn't an answer to a question. Why do people give it as one all the time? That's so annoying. Said people should be stoned to death.

"Charlie, it was years ago. I don't know." I answered honestly, albeit with a chuckle. I managed to maintain my good spirits externally, but on the inside, I was completely sapped. The minimal amount of sleep I had, coupled with the poor quality of that which I actually attained, drained me entirely of any motivation to see the day through. "Aw fuck it." I moaned as I stood from the table with a squeak from the wooden chair.

"What?" Charlie asked curiously.

"I'm going back to bed. Call the school for me?". When I moved to put the soiled mug in the sink, Charlie's face darkened, but beneath the frown, there appeared to be some resolve.

"I'll stay home too." She finally announced after a few moments of contemplation.

"Oh God, why?" I groaned in annoyance. Was she sick too or just going to keep bothering me? Her face was near unreadable and that scared me as to her motives.

"Someone has to watch you."

"No, they really don't."

"I wasn't asking for permission."

It had bad written all over it. It smelled vile and malicious, but something kept me from wanting to throw her out of the house and lock the door. I'm not sure whether I was starting to like her ever so slightly more or just growing to not be bothered to care anymore. Either way, I allowed her to stay (not that anything could stop her anyway).

We whittled the day away by watching movies, doing a little talking, playing a little Call of Duty (at which I hang my head in shame for losing), and a couple of naps together on the couch. As annoying as Charlie is for just about everything that she does, it was a good day, the first in a while. It felt like old times when she was younger and easier to handle, and I wasn't such a chronic sour-puss. As much as I'd never admit it, I missed being able to hang out with Charlie on good terms and have her be sweet and affectionate, like a big sister should be. She even mixed peanut butter into the chocolate-chip cookie dough because I love it.

So we were sitting on the couch under a blanket, she was curled into my side, I had an arm around her, and we were both still in our pajamas. Bailey was snoring contently at my feet. Right when I'm finally coming around to start trying to get along with her like we used to, she ambushes me.

"Hey Humphrey?" she mumbles into my chest, barely audible above the TV show that we were hardly watching.

"Yeah?"

"Can we talk about something and have you promise not get mad at me?" she said meekly, sounding vaguely threatened. While the way she said it kinda hurt, Charlie was not supposed to sound meek. It's just so wrong and unnatural. Something was very amiss with where this conversation was going. I sighed before speaking, while I weighed both options.

"No, but I can promise that I won't hold it against you." I joked sarcastically. She didn't respond to the humor in the slightest way. Everything about this seemed ominous, as if she was about to drop a huge bombshell. I rubbed her arm reassuringly, trying to coax whatever she wanted to say out over her.

"Do you hate Kate?". And there it was. It was more of a nuke than a bombshell. What a loaded question. It was thought provoking to say the least. I had to really mull over my answer, because _I_ wasn't even sure.

"Umm…no, not really." I replied, trying to sound casual about it. I wanted to hate her. Everything would be easy and make sense if I could bring myself to despise her. I longed to be able to have that logical of a feeling toward her, but I couldn't. All that I could think about was her long, golden hair, her glorious, ever present smile, her eyes bearing the vibrant color of ale, and equally as intoxicating. I heard her symphonic laugh in my ears, felt the warm, tingling touch of her skin on mine, and the care and compassion that seemed to seep from her pores floated through my head. I couldn't hate her if I tried. She's too much of everything I've ever wanted. And because I can't let go of her, I'm in pain. Stupid brain! Stupid feelings!

"So why don't you talk to her anymore, then?". Even if there is little previous evidence to point to it, Charlie must have been asking out of some place of concern. At least, that is what I told myself.

"You're missing the point. She doesn't want to talk _to_ _me_ and she has a boyfriend anyway." I groaned, throwing my head against the padded back of the couch. I lifted the remote and turned the TV off. This conversation at least warranted my full attention.

"So what? Were you only talking to her to get in her pants?" she asked, seeming rather offended by what I said. Who knew she cared so much about how I treat other women? _I_ never would have guessed it.

"Charlie." I admonished, rolling my eyes, though she missed the gesture. "I've been her friend before I even knew what was in her pants.". I chuckled a little. At least I can get some enjoyment out of the humor that I inject into this incredibly awkward situation.

"Then why does it matter?"

"It doesn't." I defended coolly; "He doesn't want me around and she seems perfectly alright with that.". This is a rather off-putting topic. I have no idea why everybody wants to talk about it. It's the most relevant to me and _I_ don't even want to bring it up.

"Are _you_ alright with that?"

"Hey do you want some pizza?" I earnestly blurted. There was nothing more that I wanted to say about this, so I ended the conversation. Charlie sat up and pointedly glared at me through half-lidded eyes.

"Humphrey…" she chided me.

"Charlie…" I returned in the same tone of voice, giving her the same look. I meant it; end of conversation. We had a bit of a staring match before she relented.

"Yeah, pizza's fine."

"Good, because I'm starving." I groaned, stretching sore muscles. Apparently sleeping on the couch and spending the day with 100-or-so pounds of dead weight on you isn't the best for your back. I ordered our usual medium pepperoni pizza for delivery on my phone. I turned the TV back on and replaced my arm around Charlie. I didn't stop the conversation because I was mad at her; it was just getting too personal for me to want to continue. I think she understood that. Hopefully she did. I think we were finally getting to the point where she could be mature enough to be my friend again.

We spent another twenty minutes trying to stay warm in a sort of hug, watching a rather amusing episode of Futurama in relative silence. There was a knock on the door, as expected. I got up, pulling a wad of bills out of my pocket, while Bailey bellowed out a few barks. I whistled two notes and she promptly sat. I held my palm up and blew out a crescendo, telling the dog to stay, to her disappointment. I couldn't have her eating the pizza guy though.

I counted out thirteen dollars, which amounted to about a 33 percent tip, but I didn't mind the generosity. People like that live off gratuity. I opened the door and much to my surprise, there wasn't a delivery boy, but a familiar girl with textbooks in hand.

"Oh, Kate. What…uh…what're you doing here?" I spouted awkwardly, flustered in panic. I glanced back to see Charlie staring at me with a hand over her mouth and incredibly open eyes. Why does the world hate me? I guess the feeling is mutual.

"Hi Humphrey. Are you feeling okay?" she asked, with an admittedly flattering amount of worry in her voice, though laced with severity. Recognizing the sound, Bailey broke her hold and rushed the door, tail wagging ecstatically at the scarcely seen friend. "Hey baby girl." She cooed at the dog, bending over and scratching behind her ears. It stung a little in my chest for a pair of reasons. One, that she would know my dog's favorite place to be pet, and two, that the dog had been so deprived of one of her more favored humans for no good reason.

"I'm okay. Just didn't really feel like going to school.". I wanted to keep the discussion short and impersonal. She was obviously unhappy to be there and only doing so out of obligation, so I spared her the time it would take for small talk.

"Oh…okay." she said, quickly righting herself. Her eyes peeked up at mine for an instant and I quickly diverted them. Any glimpse at hers felt like a searing knife. I couldn't bear it for more than a moment.

"So did you need something?" I asked politely, trying to speed the interaction along for both our sakes. She seemed confused by the question at first, but then extended the books in her hands out to me. I took them obligingly.

"Umm…oh, yeah. I brought you textbooks for the homework.". I didn't see her face as she spoke, as I was pointedly staring at her shoes, but I'm sure it resembled something akin to dismay or agitation. Why would she feel anything else?

"How did you get in my locker?" I asked curiously.

"I didn't. These are mine.". Oh. That's…interesting. Certainly nice of her. I'd expect nothing less. She's amazing to everyone.

"Don't you need them?"

"No, I did it already. I could help you if you want.". There it was again, the stinging feeling. She's too compassionate to not offer to help. I couldn't let her just torture herself by spending the time with me. It'd be cruel, not to mention awkward.

"No, I'll be alright, but thank you."

"O-Okay. Well, you're welcome. I'll see you around, I guess.". She appeared to be almost saddened by my refusal. It must have been a product of her hiding relief.

"Yeah. See you." I responded, smiling formally before pulling Bailey away from the door with my free hand and kicking it closed. As soon as the barrier was set between us, I let out a deep sigh and closed my eyes. Dear God, had that been painful. I felt like I wanted to jump out of my skin. I don't know how I can survive this every day, if one talk takes so much out of me.

"Jeez, that was weird." Charlie blurted from the couch.

"Tell me about it." I said, setting the books down neatly next to my backpack on the floor. "Now where's that damn pizza guy."

(Time skip: Next Morning)

Some weird interactions occurred today. When I got out of bed, I steeled myself in preparation for anyone and everyone who might want to talk about the encounter with Kate, because apparently my life is incredibly entertaining. I had to sit through a very awkward meeting with her to give the textbooks back. Also weird was that Charlie clung to my side for most of the day. I don't know what possessed her to show so much affection in public, but wow was it annoying. I had to restrain myself from beating her away with a stick. I managed to shoo her off eventually though. Even Bailey knows not to pester me like that. I have no doubt that the dog is the smarter of the two.

Thankfully, Lily was the only person who wanted to speak with me about Kate. I'm not entirely sure exactly how grateful I should have been, though, because she is pretty high on the list of people I _don't_ want to talk with about it. Still, she was pretty insistent.

"So whose idea was that anyway?" I asked, unsure as to which answer I'd rather be given.

"What do you mean?". She sat beside me in the hallway, next to the door of the history class I had next period. I'd actually gotten to know our history teacher, Mr. Jackson. He's a pretty young guy, maybe in his late twenties, plays some video games, and is pretty funny, so we get along alright. It probably helps that I'm the only one who actually gives a damn in the class, but only by a hair.

"Whose idea was it to come to bring me the books? Yours or Kate's?" I asked cynically. I needed to find something to be vindictive about. I couldn't let it rest as just simply a nice gesture. That'd be too…confusing.

"Does it matter?". Can't anyone just answer a question plainly? Does every inquiry need to be followed by an interrogation?

"A lot, actually.". She had the gall to roll her eyes at me. I wore a mask of callousness, the emotions and turmoil underneath completely indiscernible.

"Hers." She finally answered. Like I said, I don't know which answer I was hoping for. If it was Kate's, I'd be upset that she was being nice to me out of obligation and if it was Lily's, I'd be upset that she made Kate do it. It's a completely irrational contradiction. I must be losing my mind. I sighed audibly and stared straight ahead, trying to decipher my own thoughts. Lily took it as a sign of distress, so she decided to interject. "She really doesn't hate you, you know." She added.

I sighed again. She is probably right. I can't imagine Kate hating anyone. That doesn't matter though, because either way, she doesn't want to be around me. "I know." I replied flatly, closing my eyes and throwing my head back against the locker with a loud thud.

A few minutes later, the bell rang, Lily got up to go to class, and the hallway swarmed with students. I remained seated, knowing that I had a few minutes before I had to actually be in the classroom. I kinda wish I hadn't though, because it meant I had to have the last weird encounter of the day. A head of red hair atop a hulking body ambled lazily by, before stopping in front of me.

"Wilson?" Garth asked leaning onto the lockers above me. I strained my eyes to look up at him tiredly. What could he have possibly wanted?

"What?" I responded in a deep, uncaring, monotone grumble.

"Couple of us on the football team are throwing a party next Saturday. You should come." He announced with a typical proud smirk. I squinted suspiciously at him. With all the things I could have guessed that he came to me for, inviting me to a party didn't exist in the same universe. He seemed too genuine to be playing some weird angle though. He was calm and a little smug; not uncontrollably laughing his ass off, like I knew he would be. Maybe I had unwittingly made friends with him by beating him up and then apologizing. I should work on that so I don't do it again accidentally.

"I don't know…parties aren't really my thing.". Why would I want to be in such a cesspool of sweaty teens and hormone emboldened libidos? Why would I want to go anywhere to be with _people_? Doesn't everyone know I don't like people? I thought it was obvious. I stood up and threw my back pack over my shoulder, when I turned to face him.

"Aww, come one. Hot girls and dancing? You could find something to do.". Why was he trying so hard to get me to go? I'd only talked to him like three times in as many years, and two of those times were on extraordinarily bad terms.

"Those are exactly what I'm afraid of." I joked half-heartedly, earning a hardy laugh and meaty slap on the back. Oh no! I was making it worse.

We walked into history together, me doing my best to duck the conversation as fast as possible, and eventually he got me to concede to 'think about it'. What had I gotten myself into?

 **A/N: So was it worth the wait? Please tell me in a review. Sorry if I disappointed you by not being on time. I won't make any promise because I'm not the greatest at keeping them apparently, but I will try really hard to have the next chapter on time if not early and to make it especially long. Also, I started adding chapter titles. Take a look. It's kinda fun if you try to guess which chapter is which by the titles, because they are all references to the content. If you think you came up with a better one, please tell me. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	17. Face-Sucking Folly

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 17 _Face-Sucking Folly_

 **A/N: Oh boy, do I ever have a chapter for you guys. :) Warning: under-aged drinking, and quite a bit of it. I feel like I need to clarify a few things. I have anxiety; have for all of my life, which led to depression. Humphrey is depressed, which led to anxiety. His is more curable and less long lasting. Also, I never specifically mentioned it, but Sam and Candy are twins. I just never outright said it, but they always have been.**

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" **i want cookies" alphawolfyq**

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(Humphrey's POV)

(Wednesday, November 3rd)

"What do you mean?"

There was no way I could believe what I just heard. I didn't want to believe. It felt so…threatening to everything I was trying to accomplish. I my fastidiousness and distancing seemed like it could have all been for naught. No, that can't be right.

"It's really not that confusing of a concept." Lily chided sarcastically. She mocked the severity and near panic in my tone. "I mean I was leaving, Kate used her eyeballs, and she looked sad. What else could I mean by 'Kate looked sad when she saw me coming here.'?". Lily had wanted to hang out afterschool. I didn't care enough either way to refuse, so I offered that she come to my house. We were both sitting on the couch, watching TV and she thought that this piece of information would be a _perfect_ conversation starter.

"Well…" I started, too flustered to complete a sentence at first try. "Did she know where you were going?" I asked, trying to assure myself that it had to be anything other than what I thought was happening. It would be too confusing and make everything seem so nonsensical.

"Yeah. I told her I was coming here. You know, because she's my sister and all." She continued sardonically. I shot her a pointed glare which she rolled her eyes at.

"Why would she be sad?". Maybe, just maybe, I could hope for a good answer, something that would actually silence more questions than it would bring up.

"Do you want me to be honest?". That really wasn't it. That really, really wasn't it. I don't know if she could have prefaced her answer in a way that would have been scarier. I almost trembled in my seat at how foreboding it was.

I gave her an unamused scowl and said "No, I want you to lie through your teeth."

"Okay." She responded calmly, with a happy bounce in her shoulders.

"Yes I want you to be honest!" I almost yelled. She fucks around too much sometimes. It wears my patience thin in a very short amount of time.

"Oh, well why didn't you just say so?" She joked, a jeering smirk spreading across her face. "My guess would be that it has something to do with the fact that you talk to me, but not her." She added, this time including a sense of propriety in her speech.

"So, like…like she was jealous or something?". Even though that would be flattering to say the least, any image in my mind of Kate did not involve jealousy. It'd be an uncharacteristically petty thing for her to covet something as trivial as me. God knows that I'm barely worth Lily's time.

"Or something." Lily assented, effectively ending that portion of the discussion. Or at least, the portion that existed outside of my mind. Sure it certainly wasn't definitive, but at least for a moment I could think that Kate would be envious of the people I spend time with. That thought exited as quickly as it entered my brain, because it was positively refuted by the actually definitive evidence to the contrary. Kate didn't want to be around me, and I shared the sentiment. It wasn't bringing me anything good.

I frowned pensively as I recalled a recent, similar chat with Charlie on this subject. Maybe Lily would have something to say about it. Hopefully something constructive. I sighed as I got ready to open up a little bit to the girl.

"Charlie asked me if I hated Kate.". Lily turned to consider me face to face. I met her gaze with a placid one of my own and she was stricken with curiosity.

"And what did you say?"

"No." I replied flatly. I was going to try and make I as painless as I could, having every answer be as matter-of-fact as possible.

"Just no?"

"Pretty much."

"And was it true?"

I drew in another large breath. "Yes. I don't hate your sister. I just can't help but be a little mad at her.". That wasn't the entirety of the truth. I also wanted to basically run away from the feelings I had for her and away from the pain they caused me. I couldn't be around her when I had no chance.

"Why is that?"

"Because she kinda ditched me… _again._ I mean, I was her best friend for five years and then you guys leave, not that I blame you for it. Then, you guys come back and I'm still her best friend and she shrugs me off for a guy she had known for like three days. That's kind of a dick move if you ask me.". It does sound logical when I say it like that, and I don't know how else I can say it, but something in me is a lot more than just angry. There is a lot of hurt and sadness inside my brain that have wrapped themselves around the thought of her. As simple as it would be, I couldn't just be angry at her.

"Yeah, you're probably right. Still though, why don't you hate her?". With that, I had run out of excuses to dodge the question instead of baring my heart out with feelings I didn't even understand myself. I couldn't think of a sly way to weasel my way around the real answers, so I went for something more blunt.

"You know, you ask a lot of questions. What about you? Do you like anybody at school?" I asked, in the same irreverent way that she appears to reserve just for me. I took the pink rising to her cheeks as a small victory and the diversion of her eyes as an even bigger one.

"Maybe." She said, flashing a coy grin at the floor. I smiled at the prospects of giving her the torment that I so readily could.

"Oh, pray tell." I prodded, knowing all too well from experience what this sort of question would be like. When she didn't answer but retained the smile, I poked her arm playfully and inquired "A boy perhaps?". The deepening of her smile signaled to me the extent to which I had her in the palm of my hand. "Well go on. What's his name?"

"Soooo not telling." She refuted, though in good spirits.

"Fair enough. So tell me about him.". It seemed like her eyes brightened as she thought of this mystery guy. Whoever he was, I was really happy for Lily. Although, I hoped that he wasn't as asinine as Hutch, that she got the other set of genes for her taste in men.

"He's really tall." She admitted, very apparently fawning over said guy.

"Mhm." I hummed with a nod, trying to coax further description.

"And he's super nice."

"Yeah?"

"And incredibly cute." She added, the full effects of her swooning taking effect as her shoulder slumped with a happy sigh.

"That's awesome Lily. So are you gonna make a move?". I actually kinda wanted to meet this guy. It almost felt like if I was her dad, trying to make sure he knows to tread lately and treat her well. Also, to just see what else I can learn about him.

"Humphrey, I'm a girl. I can't 'make a move', he has to ask _me_." She said, actually holding up her fingers and curling them as she quoted me.

I leaned in and whispered like a secret, "You know girls can ask guys out, right?". I laughed a little as she slapped my arm lightly, her lips bunching up to try and hide her smile.

"And how would you know?" she retorted, though her eyes widened as soon as it left her mouth. She seemed to regret at, as it was, admittedly, a little inconsiderate of the previous context of the conversation. I just took it in stride, knowing that she didn't mean anything by it. Let it never be said that I can't take a joke.

"Oooh. Burn." I replied, laughing derisively. The girl joined in, evidently glad that I took no offense. That was the beginning of many a long conversation with Lily while she visited my house. It was pleasant, despite the inherent awkwardness and that which she forcefully injected. All in all, I came out no worse for the experience. All the talk of Kate did make me think of the bitter reminder of her in my closet. It'd been there for a couple of months, but I didn't even want to think about it.

(Time skip: 7:36pm Saturday, November 6)

"Why not? _Everyone_ is going to this party." Charlie whined to my nonplussed ears. She had barged into my room while I was using my laptop on my bed and proceeded to jump on as if she was invited. Furthermore, she started bitching and moaning about how I wasn't intending to go to the football team's party.

"I'm not sure how well you know me, but I'm seldom included in 'everyone' at our school." I deadpanned, scrolling through my YouTube subscriptions list for something interesting to watch.

"Aww come on. I don't want to go alone." She complained, falling over to groan into the comforter.

"Since when do I care what you want?" I joked, ignoring her overdramatic display. "If you don't want to go alone, then don't go." I suggested, but only half seriously. I planned on spending the whole night in my room, so I couldn't be bothered with what Charlie did.

"But I _want_ to go."

"Well you just want it all, don't you?" I scoffed, finding my own amusement in her pestering requests.

"Humphrey, I hardly ever ask you for anything." She added, picking her head up to give me a pleading look. She even folded her hands together beseechingly.

"What!? I drive you to school every day." I guffawed. In what world does she not ask me for anything? That's where I want to live, because in this one, all she does is bug me, ask for stuff, and then bug me by asking for stuff.

"Yeah, but I don't _ask_ you for it. Plus, you're my brother, you're supposed to drive me to school.". What an entitled little brat. I know for damn sure what I'm never doing again.

"I'm your _younger_ brother. You're supposed to drive me around." I corrected, still doing my level best to shirk her pleas.

"You need to get out more. Let's go. Maybe you can meet a nice girl." She supplemented, as if it were a convincing argument.

"Yeah because meeting nice girls has worked out _so_ well for me so far. If anything, that's what I'm afraid of." I joked, laughing to myself, possibly in an attempt to keep from being saddened by what I just admitted.

"Humphrey…" Charlie admonished with half-lidded eyes and a furrowed brow. She was relentless. There was going to be no convincing her otherwise.

"Fine. Two hours, that's it." I grudgingly agreed, shifting my laptop off of me and getting up. Charlie squealed in excitement and got up as well. "And I know you don't actually want me there. You just want me to drive you home when you get plastered.". She could get away with it tonight too. Paul was staying at work overnight, so he couldn't be home to catch her drunk. However, I'm not exactly what he would do if he was. I can't imagine him actually being that mad. He mostly lets us make out own decisions and hell, he even gave me first taste of alcohol.

I adorned a nice, light blue and white baseball shirt **(not jersey)** , the sleeves stopping just below my elbow, a pair of dark blue jeans, and my blue and black Adidas. I guess I really like blue. There is probably some cruel irony in that because I'm sad all of the time. Either that or it just matches my eyes. One or the other really. I walked downstairs to see Charlie (surprisingly, considering how slow she moves when _I_ need her to) waiting for me in a gray crop top, her own blue jeans, and a pair of Chuck Taylors.

"Ready to go?" I asked, heading toward the front door.

"Almost." She answered, coming forward to meet me. When she reached where I was standing, she stopped and began tugging at the sleeves of my shirt and its collar. I swatted at her preening hands and tried to kill her with my glare. She returned it mockingly.

"Come on." I grumbled in frustration, opening the door and starting toward car. Charlie followed behind me after locking the door. She directed me to the house while I drove. To say the least, she's not amazing at doing that. She's the kind of navigator that tells you to turn when you're ten feet past the exit. Half-way through, I just told her to give me the address and put it in my phone so it could get us there. If I let Charlie keep doing it, I might have abandoned her in a ditch somewhere. I had no doubt that she didn't need to be giving directions to lead me to do that though. If there is one thing she is good at, it's pissing me off.

We got to the house eventually and from the sidewalk we could definitely hear the music blaring from inside. It was exacerbated by the fact that the door was wide open, people spilling out onto the lawn; one guy's stomach was doing exactly that too. I braced myself for what was about to befall me. There was going to be a lot of drinking, consequently a lot of drunk people, bass too loud to hear anything else, probably some really horny, gross teenagers, and possibly Kate. That was the dreariest of the possibilities.

She was part of the reason I agreed to go in the first place. Not in the hope of seeing her, God no, anything but. There was just a scathing hope that I could, in fact, meet a nice girl, someone who could help me forget about and get over Kate. Someone to be the last nail in the coffin of getting past her. Or at least that I could solidify the fact that I could have a good time since her.

So Charlie and I walked up to the party and entered nonchalantly. The various strobe lights assaulted my eyes and it was incredibly hot inside. No one really paid any mind to us, so she broke off to do her own thing and I managed to squeeze through the writhing mass of bodies to the kitchen. It was less populated which allowed me room to actually breathe. I kinda wish I hadn't, though, because all that I could smell was sweat and cheap booze.

Speaking of which, Garth spotted me and came over with two red solo cups in hand. He patted me on the back and said he was 'glad that I decided to get some bitches' or something equally as ridiculous. He handed me one of the cups under instructions to 'loosen up'. I inspected it before deeming that it was in fact cheap beer. Apparently, he really had thought we were friends now, for whatever thing I must have done wrong. He probably thinks that someone who can dislocate a jaw is a cool guy in his book. He eventually left to seek conquests, which left me relatively alone. That didn't really matter.

I took a sip of the beer and was barely able to refrain from gagging as I swallowed a gulp. I don't know where they found the stuff, but it was somewhere between piss and soap. I set the putrid liquid down on the counter and turned to pilfer the refrigerator for something actually consumable to wash the taste out. I settled for a bottle of water.

The pounding beat of what barely passed for music stung my ears, giving me a rather unpleasant headache. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if it gave me a nosebleed and a concussion. I ambled out the back to sit on the steps of the open-air patio. I stared out into the otherwise calm night, thinking to myself 'What in the hell am I doing here?'. Obviously I didn't belong and I was only being miserable. I regretted agreeing to get dragged along. At least Charlie was responsible enough to get a designated driver, but that meant I had to stay there for that reason. I sighed. It was going to be a long two hours.

I sat there for a while, I have no idea how long, taking the occasional sip from my bottle and staring at the faint needlepoints of light that the stars made. I didn't care that I looked like a stuck up prick or someone who was about to give blood tomorrow, I wasn't drinking anything else but the water.

Eventually, a slight voice asked "Can I sit with you?". I turned to see Lily standing there, nursing her own cup of garbage. I obliged in a wave of my arm. She sat down next to me, bumping into me a bit and staying pretty close. I blamed that on the alcohol. I had more reason to drink than most kids my age, but _I_ didn't even want to, so I don't understand why everyone else felt the need.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, trying to make small talk. She was interrupting my alone time, though in a decent surprise.

"Partying. Are you doing anything here besides moping?" She asked, slightly rudely and in slightly slurred speech, both of which I also blamed on the alcohol. I laughed despite it.

"No, not really. I'm Charlie's chauffeur."

"You could at least try to have some fun. It wouldn't kill you." She taunted, taking another sip of beer. It must be an acquired taste.

"I think it just might." I chuckled back.

"Alright, that's it." Lily announced resolutely, rising from the step we sat on unsteadily. "Now you have to dance with me." She commanded, grabbing my wrist and pulling me up to stand.

"Lily, I'm not really much a dancer." I said, trying to avoid doing really anything. I was perfectly content to just sit there the rest of the night until I needed to get my sister.

"Doesn't matter, you're dancing." She demanded, giving me another tug onto the patio. We could still here the blaring music from inside, but with the wall in between us, it wasn't so bad. Lily, still holding onto my arms, began swing her own, bobbing her head a little, and began mumbling the words along to this song that I've never heard. I supposed it kind of passed for dancing, though I was only standing still with my arms under the control of someone else.

Admittedly, I could see what she was trying to do. She was doing her best to get me to have a good time, whether I liked it or not. I appreciated the effort and the sentiment, so I started shuffling my feet ever so slightly and smiling at the girl. She looked like she was having an alright time herself. She let go of my limbs, presumably allowing myself to dance on my own, although in reality, it was little more than stepping side to side and snapping my fingers.

"You look really handsome tonight." She said. "You clean up nice.". I wasn't sure if it was intended as a back-handed compliment or a genuine one that came out wrong in her stupor. I figured I'd just decide for myself.

"Thanks. You look really pretty too." I admired graciously. She smiled in appreciation.

"Really? You think so?" she asked bashfully.

"Yeah. You usually do." I added, further extending the reaches of how nice I was. There was no harm in telling her she was pretty, right? I wasn't lying. A shy girl like her could probably use a confidence boost too. She giggled at the compliment. She looked like he was having a really fun time, so I was having one vicariously through her. One of us should be able to.

She started walking a little closer to me and I smiled again. As expected, she returned it, but what I didn't expect (and probably couldn't have ever) was that she put her arms around my neck, pressed her front to mine, and stood up on the tips of her toes to kiss me. I was shocked to say the least, though I didn't let it show. I just froze, eyes staring at her closed ones, as I felt her lips on mine. My hands instinctively fell to rest on her hips while I contemplated the situation. Lily was a girl, who I had known for a long time, was good friends with me, was very pretty, and altogether, was someone that I cared for quite a bit. In the moment, I just hung my sense of it, closed my eyes, and let myself enjoy it.

That was the first time I had kissed a girl in actual passion. Thankfully, I had already learned how, so it wasn't a total mess. My head swelled with the sensation of the kiss and the feeling of her body hugged close to mine, the two only separated by a few millimeters of fabric. It was a lot to take in all at once. I felt the hot breath from her nose, the softness of her lips, and how warm and close to me she felt.

While I got a little lost in the thoughts, I hadn't noticed that her tongue had begun to explore my mouth. It was still a good feeling, but with it came a lot of other things. First and foremost was the unpleasant taste of the liquor. That brought with it the realization that Lily had probably drunk a lot of it. She was drunk at a party now I was making out with her. At that point I disconnected from her with an audible pop.

"Lily…how much have you had to drink?" I asked cautiously. My nerves were still rife with the feel and taste of her.

"I don't know. I'm just a little tipsy." She answered, licking her lips noticeably, though likely not intentionally. Her actual intoxication was betrayed by her glazed over eyes and wobbly stance. I had let myself take advantage of her in my unthinking, emotional state. All that I could do now was try to correct the situation like a real man would.

"Come on. Let's get you home." I said, walking over to put an arm around her to guide her back into the house.

"I'm okay." she babbled as we traipsed through the still raging party. I was looking for Charlie and only half-paying attention to what Lily said. "I came here with Hutch and Kate.". That caught my ear though. I stopped moving and turned to face her.

"What?" I questioned urgently.

"Kate didn't want to be here with just Hutch, so she asked me to come along." She explained. The question of why Kate wouldn't just go with Hutch did not cross my mind. Instead, I was angered by the fact that Kate brought her little sister to this cesspit and then didn't even care to keep track of her. For all she knew, Lily could have been drugged and passed out on the lawn. I faced forward again and returned my arm around the girl to start walking.

I gruffly told her "Hurry up.". Honestly this sounded like something irresponsible that Charlie would do. In fact, that basically is what Charlie did to me. Eventually I spied her, sitting on a couch and doing her best to suck the face off of somebody else. I couldn't see exactly who until I got closer. Then I was in for a real surprise. That person turned out to be some 12th grade girl I didn't know the name of, but recognized. I groaned in frustration. I know for a fact that Charlie isn't a lesbian and I wouldn't have a problem with it if she was, but I know that this meant the she was hammered already. That meant I had to deal with two drunk girls. Just my luck.

I walked over to her, grabbed her by the arm, and hauled her away, much to the disapproval of the surrounding partygoers. I didn't care. I dragged both girls, despite their protests, out to my car. I made Charlie get in the back and Lily in the passenger seat. I had to buckle both of their drunken asses in and resist their persistent attempts to poke and tickle me while I did it. I grumpily shut the door and walked around to get in on my side.

"I don't believe this." I growled, in a low voice that could hardly be heard. I was mostly just talking to myself.

As I started the car and pulled from the spot on the street that I was parked on, I heard Charlie whine "How come Lily gets to sit in the front?". Great, she's even more childish drunk.

"Shut up. I'd put her in the back too if I didn't think you'd make out with her." I admonished angrily. Lily just thought that was hysterical. It probably had something to do with the irony of the fact that it meant that she was seated next to me. That probably wasn't true. I doubted that she could even understand irony right then.

"It was a dare." Charlie laughed, as though it were sound logic and _I_ was the one being irrational. I glared at her in the rear view mirror and she mockingly pursed her lips, though she didn't say another word.

"Lily, would you be alright if I dropped you off at your house?" I asked, trying to deal with the now worse headache that I had. Why did it always have to be me? Why can't someone else have to babysit these two? I didn't even want to go out in the first place.

"No!" she almost shouted. I looked at her skeptically and she softened. "I…I can't go home smelling like beer.". I groaned again.

"Fine. You can stay at our house. Is that okay?" I suggested, irritation leaking through my pores. I took my eyes off the road to look at Lily when she didn't answer for a second and she smiled back devilishly. She picked up her hand and laid it on my arm, grinning at me. I batted it away and turned back to the road. This night is taking a turn for the absurd.

I eventually got us all home and it took all of my willpower not to bash both of their skulls in. Less so for Lily, because it wasn't entirely her fault, but I was angry and no one was safe. I walked into the house and the other two stumbled in. Thankfully, Bailey was on my side and seemed just as irked. Eventually, I got them settled down and ready for bed. I practically carried Charlie up the stairs to her room with how little she could manage the steps. I closed the door once she was inside and left her to her own devices while I went downstairs to get my other charge.

I repeated the same process, albeit a little easier because Lily is slightly lighter and was slightly less inebriated. I brought her to my own room, cleaned it up a bit, and then helped her out of her shoes before tucking her into my bed. I couldn't be more annoyed by it all. Not only did I have these two extra responsibilities, the frustration with Kate from tonight, and that of nights before, now I had to sacrifice my own bed. Amazing turn of events this was.

Lily looked rather hopeful as she grinned and patted the bed beside her. I wasn't the least bit bemused. I told her a firm 'No', feeling oddly like a parent again, and wagged an accosting finger at her. I then turned off the lights and headed downstairs to sleep out the rest of the night on the couch. There was too much to think about and too little energy to do it. Flat-out _amazing_.

(Times skip: 10:32am, Sunday, November 7th)

I woke up groggy and grumpy, and likely not pleasant to be around. Memories of the previous night came flooding back to the forefront of my mind, but instead of letting it bother me or stress me out, I laughed. It was actually pretty funny and almost like a sitcom. I rarely ever get to see Charlie drunk and she was so far gone. Not to mention that Lily was pretty funny too. I kept chuckling all the way into the kitchen and started making my morning coffee. Today was going to be hysterical.

I was still amused by the time the drink was ready and smiled as I took sips. A few minutes later, light footsteps came down the stairs and as they stopped, a tired face and white hair appeared.

"Well hello there." I greeted cordially. I couldn't help the grin that was slipping out. God it was all so ridiculous.

"Hi Humphrey." She mumbled sleepily, clutching her head. It's kinda fun to see it be someone else for once.

"You want some coffee? There is some more in the pot." I offered politely, still smiling at her as she took a seat at the table.

"No thanks." She muttered.

"You sure? Do you want anything else?". I was just trying to be a good host, but that didn't make it any less entertaining.

"Nah. I'm not really hungry.". She sounded so exhausted and looked the part.

"Ah. I see. Well that makes sense considering how hungover you must be." I teased, only to my own delight. I looked into her bloodshot eyes and sighed, succumbing to my pseudo-code-of-honor. "I'll get you some Tylenol." I said as I set my mug down and started walking toward the bathroom on this floor.

Before I left the room, she timidly spoke "Humphrey, wait. Before you go, I have this…memory, and I'm not sure if it's from a dream or not.". I grinned from ear to ear in anticipation. I was excited for how entertainingly awkward it would be for her. I only found it all the more laughable. She continued, eyeing me suspiciously, "It had to do with you…a-and me.". That was all that I needed to hear before I understood completely.

"You should let me get the Tylenol before I answer that." I joked, turning away from her to get the medicine. Before I was out of earshot, however, I did catch her groan into her hands. I snickered to myself until I returned. "Here you are, kiddo." I said as I handed her the bottle.

"Thanks.". She took two tablets and swallowed them, before returning her head to her hands, its rightful place. She refused to look at me. "So what now?" she groaned.

"Well I don't know about you, but I'm probably never going to mention it again and only remember it when I need a good laugh." I joked. It got her to look up and choke back giggles as she smiled.

"Ditto." She agreed.

"I should add that I'm sorry." I said more seriously. She looked at me quizzically while I continued, "I wasn't really thinking straight and I should have known that you were drunk.". She waved her hand dismissively.

"Don't worry about it. If I recall correctly, I'm pretty sure I came on to you." She responded and her smile didn't fade. I was glad that this passed over us as a joke rather than something more serious or awkward. It was nice to be able to see comedy in it.

"Yeah, yeah you did." I laughed. We both stared at each other knowingly until we heard the stairs creak again. A few moments later, a wild Charlie appeared. She walked over to the doorway leading into the kitchen when I noticed that she was only wearing a tank top and her underwear. "Christ Charlie!" I yelped as I quickly clapped a hand over my eyes. I could have gone my whole life without seeing that. It's not _so_ bad but I really wish I hadn't.

"Oh…Lily. I forgot you were here." She said casually before I heard her walk behind me to the fridge and some assorted giggling. She opened it and I heard some rustling. Then, the door closed again and a few seconds later, a table chair squeaked against the wood floor. I uncovered my eyes to see both girls giving me disapproving looks.

"Grow up." My sister derided.

"I will when you put pants on." I returned. She rolled her eyes at me, the nerve. I turned to Lily and said "See, _you_ were drunk. Little miss 'grown up' over there got utterly shitfaced.". There may have been assorted hand gestures from the other girl.

"How come you're not hungover?" Lily asked, cocking her head to the side.

"Because he doesn't drink. Something about responsible yadda yadda." Charlie answered in place of me.

I glared at her and corrected "No. I don't drink _often_ because I don't like it that much and that was garbage yesterday."

"Bullshit!" Charlie exclaimed, as if I'd affronted her. "You never drink.". I had no idea why she wanted to make an argument about this.

"No." I corrected once more. "I never drink _anymore_. I used to have beers or rum with Dad every so often.".

"What?!" She yelled, yet again insulted for no reason. Lily winced at the sound and I felt bad for the poor girl. "Where was I when this happened?"

"You were the reason we were drinking." I added, smirking victoriously. Charlie slunk back into her seat with her arms crossed and pouted.

 **A/N: This was the easiest and most fun chapter for me to right in a long time. My face hurts from smiling. I hope it came out alright. So, a few things to think about. Who is the mystery guy Lily likes? If you think you know, pm me. What's the reminder in Humphrey's closet? Same deal. Also, short announcement, I had an idea for a** _ **How to Train Your Dragon**_ **fanfic. I want to write it after if finish TVOL, but I want to know what you guys think. There is a poll on my profile. I won't switch permanently. I just want to know if I'll have to start over my fanbase that I love so much. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	18. Promise-cuity

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 18 _Promise-cuity_

 **A/N: I'm very, very, very, very, very late and I'm very, very, very, very, very sorry. Either you'll forgive me or you won't. Nothing I can do about it. Sorry to disappoint. These chapters don't grow on trees, though, so I can't always be on time. I can't believe I used to do this every two days.**

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" **Love this story so much. Thank you for the hours of enjoyment I've spent reading this story." –Guest**

 **That is all I ever wanted.**

(Humphrey's POV)

(3:16pm, Friday, November 12)

Is school meant to be anything but exhausting? Granted, I don't wake up with enough energy to manage anything to begin with, but still, there is something to be said for how draining the education system is. I guess it's a little more than just partly my fault. It would be a better argument if I was up all night studying or doing homework, but I won't lie to myself by saying that I was. I spend as much time as possible doing as little as possible.

While I intended to do exactly that afterschool, Lily had other plans. She invited me to stay to watch Kate's volleyball game today. This actually came shockingly right after she shunted a question about how things went with her parents. She doesn't talk about them much and neither did Kate, so I wasn't going to push it. I didn't really want to talk about my family either. I was hesitant at first, but I didn't have the heart to just say an outright 'no' like I wanted to. The 'puppy eyes' she gave me didn't help that either.

So, I told Charlie that I wasn't driving her and that I wouldn't be home for a few hours. Now, I was sitting on the bleachers of the gymnasium with Lily, looking on as various girls jumped, ducked, and dove to volley against the other team. I recognized Sam and Candy, who must have been the ones to goad Kate into joining the team. She was serving for the varsity squad, taking her place as the farthest from the net. That actually made a lot of sense. I had seen the work her arms and fists could do against shoulders and chests on numerous occasions, so it was no surprise that she was valued for her powerful strikes.

We were listening to the cacophony of cheers, jeers, and the sporadic grunts from players that filled the fairly large gym. I bemoaned the whole idea. I didn't understand how most of the crowd was getting so excited by what amounted to a game of 'keep it up'. I was, however, very in tune to the fact that some of the audience, specifically a few guys, were unashamedly there to stare at asses. What a shining example of high-cultured society high school is.

Lily was mostly just sitting quietly, not very atypical for her. She's generally a quiet girl. I knew I was only actually there to keep her company while she was forced to stay and wait for her sister. I didn't really mind being used so overtly. I guess that's what friends are for. I also guessed that while I was there, I could subtly root for Kate, not that she would ever notice or care. Old habits, huh? A small part of me, somewhere deeply repressed inside my psyche, is still latching onto the idea of her; holding onto the slim possibility that things would work out. I think it's scared of the rest of me though. It likes to hide away, but still whisper its poisons into my ear.

I looked on intently as Kate jumped and her hand met the white ball in an overhead serve. What now became a projectile sailed across the court and over the net, but I didn't care to follow it. I simply stared, as creepy as it sounds, at the girl as her shoes came back to the wooden floor and her flaxen, plaited hair swung this way and that with the motion. Her eyes were poised to look, almost predatorily, at her surroundings. She had such a focus and finesse conveyed through her actions. The ball sailed to the opposite side of the net with such speed and precision that it hit its mark on the floor, placed expertly far enough away to stifle any attempts to be returned.

The crowd cheered and her teammates swarmed her, thriving off the excitement off a round winning serve. It didn't mean the whole game, but everyone found it thrilling none the less. Kate smiled victoriously and clenched her fist in front of her chest, all the while receiving assorted pats on the back. The room buzzed with conversation and activity as the players cooled down momentarily and everyone waited for the next round to start.

I didn't join in the merriment, however. All that I could think about was the gracefully moving girl I had once called a friend, but now seemed anything but. She had pushed me so coldly and effortlessly from her life with no perceivable fault of my own. She somehow transformed our odd, but longstanding relationship into nothing more than people who casually and politely exist on the same planet, all in a matter of weeks. And I knew that I had done the same to her, or at least tried to. God knows that I barely manage that by the skin of my teeth.

Even then, when all that brought back the bitter memories was the sight of her, I still could hardly keep myself from screaming. How had everything slipped through my fingers? When did what was once a bond, so strong that I could almost tangibly feel it, turn to water in cupped hands? Most importantly, why did it happen to me? To us? A couple of months ago, I couldn't imagine being us closer, but then I blink and she's never been farther away.

Discontent with the situation seemed to be flowing through my veins, such that no cell of mine was spared it. Suddenly, the buzzer shrieked deafeningly and I looked up to see all of the players back on the field and the away team serving to start the round. My brain rattled with the dull roar of the audience and my eyes wailed with the piercing lights that overzealously illuminated the game.

I hadn't noticed the persistent and blindingly fast bobbing of my knee, nor the death-grip I had on the expanse of denim that covered it. They only came to my attention when there was a hand over my left-handed set of knuckles. I instantly loosened my grip on the fabric, at which point the alien appendage slid into my palm. I curled my digits around it and looked to the owner. There, sitting to the left of me, was Lily, smiling at me in an attempt at reassurance. The last few minutes passed by so quickly that I had all but completely forgotten that she was there.

One thing did draw my attention, though, almost like alarm bells abruptly going off. I had never had a panic attack in front of Lily, nor made any mention of the fact that I could. How, then, did she know exactly what was happening, well enough not to be surprised, and know exactly what to do? I had never shared my secret, emergency comfort with anyone, not even Charlie, save for one person. Said person was busy trying to keep her eye on a flying, white sphere. I looked from Lily, down to our hands, hers laced over mine and her fingers wrapped inside my palm. Then I slowly turned back to her, my face bearing something near sadness, betrayal, or general vacancy.

"Lily…" I started, fearing the inevitable answer to the unaired question, praying for anything other than what I knew would be said. I didn't know exactly how to voice the prompt. How do you just ask if her sister divulged a secret that I even did my best to keep from _her_? How do you ask exactly how much had been said about me and my specific weaknesses? How do you ask if the person, whom you spent every day trying to bring yourself to hate just so her leaving could be easier and failing miserably, was disclosing such personal weaknesses, though seeming to only be in the interest of aid? I don't think I could ask any of that in a panic and despair addled brain, let alone all of it. I didn't have to. Lily knew what was going to come from my mouth just as well as I did hers.

"Kate told me this helps." the white-haired girl said meekly, looking down to avoid meeting my eyes. "She said that she doesn't know why or what exactly it is helping with, just that it does." She continued, gaining enough confidence to look up. Her eyes told exactly how much sympathy she held, sympathy that I didn't need. Furthermore, it was sympathy that I didn't want. I didn't need either of them to help me, especially from behind my back. How could she be doing this to me, interfering with the sparse amount of people I do talk to now that she won't? How could she have thought it her place to do so? How could either of them?

I unwound my hand from hers and slid it away as I faced nowhere in particular. I felt an uncomfortable tightness in my chest and nearing familiar weight tugging at my face. Noticing my souring mood, Lily spoke up again. She began "You don't have to talk about it if…".

"I don't." I interrupted, my demeanor stony with severity. The words came out low in my throat. I felt the girl's hand retreat from my lap, but I didn't care to look at her. I didn't want her to see the ire in my stare.

"Oh." She responded, slightly taken aback by my intrusion. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her fingers come up to brush her snowy bangs out of her face. "Okay, but I just want you to know that I'm here f-…"

I stood up sharply and turned to face her, effectively cutting her off. She stopped midsentence as she met my eyes which were such a dim blue that they were almost grey. "I should go." I told her curtly, leaving no room for argument, especially since I immediately turned and shuffled through the throng on the bleachers to make my exit. I may have heard something like a whimpering goodbye, but I didn't stop to make sure and it was pretty hard to distinguish anything from the droning masses. I didn't care to anyway.

I couldn't believe Kate. Where did she get the nerve to encroach on my life? How dare she meddle with what was left of it after she effectively discarded me. My muscles tensed in frustration. It took all the strength that I could muster to not storm back into the gymnasium, rush onto the court mid-game, and express my disgust personally. It's not like I would care about the repercussions and certainly not the look Kate would have as I yelled at her. She had earned that censuring. Even more infuriating was the fact that she bothered her sister to tell her things that she doesn't even understand near completely herself, but I could distinctly remember her disregarding Lily's health and wellbeing at a certain kegger not even a week ago. Couldn't she find enough of her own business to occupy herself with?

I was running out of energy for even my own internal dry sarcasm. I drove angrily back home despite the fact that I was not expected to be there for at least another hour. When I saw the house, I begrudged the fact that there was a car parked on the curb of my house, which likely meant that someone on the street was having a party. That pointed toward little sleep tonight. I pulled into the driveway, basically huffing and puffing I'm sure, as I fumbled with my keys at the door. Small tasks became dreary toil and my head burned with a desire to just sleep for about a week. A short coma would be sweet relief. If only a brick would appear 15 feet in the air, right above me. That'd do the trick for a little while.

I lazily turned the appropriate key in the tumbler and removed it just as unenergetically as I trudged into the house. The first thing I became aware of upon entering was that the lights were out in the living room. An instant later, I took in the faint sound of grunting and what sounded like panting that came from the darkness. Lastly, I was able to make out a pale calf that hung over the back of the couch, bouncing slightly in time with the grunts and an occasional gasp.

I froze at the realization, the hold I had on my keys going limp. They clattered to the floor with a loud jingle, alerting everyone in the vicinity. I stood, almost like a deer in headlights, cemented in place, as I saw a face, indiscernible in the blackness, but with a definitively boyish mop of black hair. His shoulders were bare, which had its own implications, but what drew even more was that next, another head appeared beside it, this one with recognizable, chestnut, straight hair. I wanted to curse or shout or do anything but stand there impossibly still as horror overcame their faces.

Soon, but not as soon as I would have wished, the male scurried from the now tarnished couch and toward the open door. As his face came near the light, the tradition of nightmarish happenings continued. It could not be real that he was the very same guy who I had seen loitering around Garth so much. I refused to let that be true. He scuttled past me, out of the house, barely covering himself with a ball of clothes.

Words refused to come out of both Charlie and I's mouths for a moment as we just made what I can only assume was eye contact. I didn't want what I had just walked into to be real. After the moment of stunned silence, I managed to break a couple of sentences free. "I-I'm going to go upstairs and make sure that I'm definitely asleep. If I don't wake up in my bed, I'll be down in a minute." I said, voice cracking in the grips of shock.

I massaged my temples as I walked upstairs to the bathroom, hoping beyond all hope that this was the fevered working of my cruel imagination. I felt utterly defeated, turning on the sink faucet and splashing brisk water over my face. I hoped beyond all hope that this was all a dream or a nightmare or whatever that would make me wake up in my bed, warm and cozy while I relaxed, knowing this wasn't real. I would even settle for a reverie, induced by heavy medication for manic paranoia; anything but having actually just seen what was happening on my couch. I liked that couch too. Now it was soiled.

But, such sweet relief never came. I could distinctly feel the sheer chill on my skin and as I looked up, I saw the same, tired, sickly me. That meant there was in actuality an evidently less innocent Charlie, who, I prayed fervently, had the sense to get dressed in the meantime. If I went downstairs and she was still naked, I might have just cut my losses and murdered her. It would seem the only reasonable option.

After carefully assessing that I was painfully awake, I turned off the water and walked into the hallway, purposefully dragging out my steps. I wasn't keeping the fact that I was avoiding the confrontation a secret to myself. Nope, I was actively stalling. Anything but having to do _that_. I feared that I might actually turn into an old, scolding man in the middle of the conversation. If anyone can age me, it certainly was Charlie.

Thankfully, I got just the distraction I needed and in my opinion deserved after all I had to go through. I could hear something fervently bearing against a painted wood surface down the hall. Charlie had locked Bailey in my room to do her deed. That was egregious. Truthfully, it wouldn't surprise me if the dog scared off the stranger at first glance (though I think Charlie's brother managed that just fine, not that she would have ever considered it a possibility that I might be home early) or try to break up the…tryst. That would have been way funnier and more pleasant than me having to do it. Better yet, I wouldn't be any the wiser about it.

I let the beast out and she followed me down the stairs, probably preparing her best glare, because that is exactly what I was doing. I was too young to be having this conversation. In fact, I don't think I could _ever_ be old enough for it. There is no developmental milestone for being able to walk in on your sister and a guy, who you know first-hand is an asshole.

So there she was, sitting on the couch in the living room and looking sheepish. She _dared_ to look sheepish? This was beyond the point where she could rub her neck, kick her foot, and say 'shucks'. Alright, I had to calm down. This demanded level-headedness. God knows I didn't want to do this in the first place; I'd be much less enthused after I made us both roaring and angry. I'd already done enough irritated storming out for one day.

As would be expected, I was at a loss for words. In silence, I walked over to the armchair adjacent to the couch, which I was far from comfortable sitting on right then. I refused to look at her and just rubbed my forehead pensively. There is no preparing yourself for this. There's no manual for seeing your sister defile your favorite couch. There's only agonizing awkwardness.

"What do you want to say to me?" Charlie finally blurted after a few more moments devoid of words. As much as she was trying to expedite the process, she didn't really help. I didn't even know what I wanted to say. If it didn't seem like it would make everything worse, I would have just gotten up and left. Somehow, trying to escape the problem didn't appear to be a viable solution, so I just jumped right into it.

"So who's your boyfriend?" I asked bluntly. If nothing else, the name for the face would make the guy easier to track down and strangle.

"He's not…he's not my boyfriend." She refuted, still showing indignation despite her hesitancy.

"What's his name.". There were a long few seconds filled with just stares, but she caved to responding.

"Seth…" she started, looking to the ceiling as if it would give her the answer. "Seth something.". I stared at her in disbelief. My lips curled around sentences that just wouldn't come out

"You…you lost your virginity to a guy who you don't even know the name of?!" I exclaimed, yelling in my shock. As soon as the words came off my tongue, however, I realized my mistake; being more than a little presumptuous. I had only never seen her with any guys, but that doesn't mean there weren't any. If there was anything that I could believe, it was that she could hide something like this. Apparently, I put too much faith in her. Charlie blushed, but didn't look admonished, just embarrassed. There were several expletives floating around my head at that moment. "How many?" I finally got out, knowing for sure that there was no good answer.

She gasped, "I don't see how that's any of your business."

My brow lowered irately. "Charlie…you know very well that every guy would have told at least _someone_ at school. I want to hear it from you, so tell me." I commanded, in a low grumble. It might be a cruel, stereotypical double standard, but I'm sure all of them bragged about it at some point, which means most people would know. Even if what the metaphorical 'grapevine' has to say is that my sister is a whore (as harsh a blow as that would be), I would still rather hear it from her mouth. It would be…softer that way.

She looked into her cross-legged lap distractedly. I felt almost bad for her with the way she seemed so pitifully dejected and near heartbroken. I didn't know whether it was because I found out or because of something with some guy, but her eyes seemed almost rimmed with tears and I swear I heard her choke back a sniffle. "It's not fair." She quietly muttered. I didn't know if I heard her correctly and I was going to ask her to repeat it, but I wasn't sure if I was supposed to hear anyway. Even though she is an annoying little shit, I wasn't going to upset her if I didn't have to.

"If…if you really don't want to talk about it, you don't have to." I conceded, fumbling over the words slightly. God, I really am horrible at this stuff. She looked even more pathetic after that. It could have been a result of my shitty job or, as I suspected, maybe me actually doing it pretty well. Better than expected even. She hesitated before responding.

"It's…it's not that, just…" she trailed off, too flustered for a coherent thought.

I put on my warmest smile and called her name gently. She lifted her head enough that I could see the soft expression in her eyes. Was she ashamed? Was that just general humiliation or something more specifically… _me_ brand. "You know I'm not, like, mad or anything…right?" I asked gingerly. That'd make me feel terrible, if my sister was too afraid of my anger to confide in me. That'd hit low. I guess I do take my dry sarcasm a little too far sometimes and I'm not exactly supportive either. I wouldn't welcome her confidence, but I wouldn't want her to think that I wouldn't be there for her.

The corners of her mouth curled up briefly, but then she sighed and looked down again. "Only a few guys. Like, nine…maybe." She admitted reluctantly. I had to reconcile our apparently different interpretations of 'a few', but okay, so nine. I could count that on two hands. Was that more or less than I expected? I don't know, but it's nothing…crazy, right? There probably isn't a standardized measure of absurdity for skeletons in the closet.

"Oh." I replied dumbly. Like I said, what more would you expect. I'm not good at the whole 'talking' thing, especially when it's so personal. "Sooo…do you actually have a boyfriend?". Apparently _that_ warrants looking embarrassed, not everything else up to that point.

"Do _you_?" she snarked back, though it held no malice with the way it was squeaked out of a mouth pinched in a nervous smile.

I glared back and said "I'll take that as a no.". She leaned forward in her seat so that she could punch me in the shoulder, earning an 'oomph'.

"Why are you so judgy all of a sudden?"

"Believe me, I'm not nearly as judgmental as I could be." I returned, smirking antagonistically. So this already turned into a light hearted conversation. Still excruciating, but not as angry as I expected. It's difficult not to be at least a little peeved to find out that she'd been sleeping around behind my back, but, as I just realized, that's much better than in front of me. I can't say I'm happy that she's being yet again irresponsible, but it could have been worse. Now, curiosity was getting the better of me. "So can I ask you something?"

"That sounds dangerous."

"Ha ha. But…so when was your first time?". As soon as that actually came out of my head, I regretted it. Where did I get bold enough to say something like that? Of course when I actually have something important to say, I talk like a concussed parrot; but when I really don't mean to ask, of course it sounds normal. That is just how my life works. I was suddenly wishing that armchairs had jaws, teeth, and a particular appetite for shitty, 16 year-old guys.

"What?" she gasped, equally as surprised.

"Nevermind! Nevermind, I didn't ask that." I backpedaled frantically, looking at the floor and praying that the hypothetical, fantastical, carnivorous couch monster would swallow me whole. Charlie just laughed at my reaction. I suppose that's not the worst reaction she could have had. I pretended that my cheeks weren't coloring ferociously.

"When I was fifteen." She answered unabashedly. She probably drew confidence from my lack thereof. My eyes snapped up to meet hers and I was taken aback by the fact that she actually told me that. Never would have predicted it. I surely wouldn't tell anyone, particularly her.

"It does usually happen on the couch does it?" I half-joked. I still didn't have my mind fully wrapped around what exactly happened on it or the ominous, sweat-licked dark spots.

She chortled with me. "No. Honestly it's mostly at school. Where did you think I always am at lunch?" she retorted. I stared wide-eyed.

"Always?" I asked, noting her specific choice of words. She gave a noncommittal bob of her shoulders that I sure as hell wasn't going to press further. I winced at the knowledge, refusing to let my imagination stretch any further than the present room. I almost gagged on my tongue. Alright, that was enough cringing for one night. I had to put an end to this conversation. "Okay, I've had enough nightmare fuel. Just…be smart. And try to let it mean something for once. Who knows, you might actually get something out of a relationship other than sex.". It was almost a scolding, almost. There were underlying tones of disapproval, but not enough to be outright.

"Hold on mister. You don't get away that easy.". Charlie pointedly ignored my comments, but I knew she'd consider them. "You have to tell me about your first. It's only fair." She commanded, pointing an accusing finger at me.

I replied casually, "I would if I could.". It was a little cryptic, but she understood.

"You're a virgin?!" she yelled, covering her mouth to stifle a laugh.

"Hey! One of us has to have standards." I spat, scowling irritably. She caught the thinly veiled insult as intended and mirrored my expression. That's when I chose to stand up and take my leave. As I walked around my couch, though, she held her arm in front of me and gave me a pleading look.

"Wait…you're not going to tell Dad, are you?" she beseeched. Yeesh. That gave me a little sting, but I brushed it off as unintentional. It's true, I had no idea what Paul would do if he found out. I doubt he'd be near as calm, cool, and collected as I barely managed to be.

"No." I answered flatly. "But don't be an idiot next time.". With that bit of advice, I walked away. She looked a little stunned, but I thought I handled everything as well as could be for me. It gave me a satisfied sense of pride to be able to deal with something like that so 'smoothly'.

In a final salutation, I leaned over and pecked her on the cheek, decidedly rare for me. I only did it because I know it would make her happy right then. As I walked away though, I couldn't help but dry heave at the memory of what just happened with her. I ran upstairs and brushed my teeth just in case.

 **A/N: Bear with me guys. It'll get there eventually. Also, just a hint, there is only one pairing in the description. FYI. Please review. It helps a lot. Love you guys :)**

 **-Nick**


	19. Bear with Me

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 19 _Bear with Me_

 **A/N: Sorry that I'm a little late. I've had a lot going on inside my head and, unfortunately, that's the same place this story comes from.**

 **I've never done this before, and don't see myself doing it again, but I'd like to dedicate this chapter to someone. I've only been talking to her for a couple of weeks, but she is a really close friend. She knows exactly who she is, but is probably too modest to ever admit it. She has made me so happy over the time that I've known her, that there was no way for me** _ **not**_ **to write this chapter. In short, I owe this to her, and am indebted to her for a lot more.**

 **Fav Review:**

" **I wish charlie gets herpes." –Aguiler Alpha**

 **I was messing with his favorite character. Best review yet :D**

(Third Person POV)

Kate had absolutely no idea of what to make of her and Humphrey. He had always been a valued friend, especially when she was feeling down. She'd never tell a soul, but whenever she got homesick in New York, memories of him would always pop into her mind and bring a smile back to her face. He always managed to have that effect on her.

That's why it was so hard for her to see him lately. The pained look on his face did not escape her. Though better on some days than others, it was always keeping him from seeming happy. That upset her on its own (albeit confusing) level; but what made it so boundlessly worse was that she couldn't help him. She couldn't return the same comfort that he offered in times of need, because he wouldn't let her. She probably didn't deserve to, though.

Never before had she felt so incredibly…invaluable. She always had expectations for herself, acing all of her classes, being a star at her sport, hell she was at the top of the social food chain. She had a boyfriend who made other girls green with envy, she was always scoring the highest on exams, and she was talked about more than anyone else in the school.

Why then, with all of the new friends and success that she has, does she feel a pang every time Humphrey passes in the hallway without saying 'hello'? Why is it that out of all of the people in the school, _him_ not talking to her mattered so much? Sure she missed a friend, but she had lost them before. Why did everything feel so wrong when he wasn't in her life?

Kate had tried to get him back, but those attempts never got off the ground. Whenever she approached, it seemed liked he did his level best to get away. The few times she had managed to force him into a conversation, he always answered in monosyllables and short sentences. It was as if he didn't want to know her. At the end of every shunted talk, he always scurried off as quickly as possible, like she'd burned him.

Eventually she took the hint. Something had changed and he no longer even wanted to see her, so she resolved to make the process as painless as possible. That was easier said than done, however. The more they faded into irrelevance, the more the days tired her. Mornings lost their usual luster and by afternoon, she went home exhausted.

It was only small consolation that he eventually started talking to Lily. When she saw the two together, she could just barely make out a slight glint of the old happiness in his eyes. It didn't compare to what it used to be, but it was something. She tried to let that soothe her, but she couldn't help but be a little…something about it. Definitely not jealous. No, Kate Williams wasn't allowed to be jealous. That was forbidden, especially of her younger sister. Still, she was definitely… _whatever_ about the whole thing.

Occasionally she got an accusing look from either Sam or Candy. They always seemed like they knew too much about everything. It was as if, through some kind of twin magic, they pooled their brains together and used that power to know everything about everyone. And they knew about Humphrey and her. She'd been on the receiving end of a withering glare or two because of it. Kate understood that she was being told that she fucked up, and badly.

So, this unassuming boy that never seemed to permit her mind peace rather receded into himself. The Humphrey that used to be was the friendliest and most outwardly focused person Kate ever knew. She couldn't count the number of times he broke up a fight or a painfully awkward silence by making himself the butt of a joke. There were also countless instances where he went entirely out of his way to help a stranger or make them feel like they knew someone. He was just…amazing, in every sense of the word.

Now, he was a different person. He slept through all of his classes, rarely spoke unless spoken to, and looked honestly sick. She shouldn't have even noticed that. She had her own boyfriend and friends that were actually talking to her. She didn't need to be worrying about…an old friend.

That was the weirdest part. She thought so much more about Humphrey than Hutch. Hutch was…well he kinda just _was_. He's a pretty alright guy and all, but she really just felt like he was just another kid that went to her school. Sure, he was attractive, hell, hot even, but she wasn't actually all that _attracted_ to him. He was only a kinda-sorta friend that she kissed.

That was the worst part for her too. There was no connection between the two of them and it mostly felt gross. Maybe not gross, but more repulsive. It was just needless, wet saliva swapping and she wasn't a fan. She especially didn't appreciate when he… _claimed_ her in front of the entire school, often in the middle of the hallway, or that he got so handsy when they kissed. It didn't feel like being 'touched' or 'caressed'; no, it was groping and just that. And she hated it, but she admittedly signed up for it when she became his girlfriend, didn't she?

She realized that there was a sordid irony in the fact that she cared about her relationship with the boy that never speaks to her more than the one whom she was dating. Being with Hutch was like just existing in the same room, but talking to Humphrey was like she was closer to him and knew him better than herself. They were so open and honest with each other, that they were beyond finishing each other's sentences. It felt like she knew exactly what he was thinking and vice-versa wordlessly. She saw very well that she missed that.

All of this emotional turbulence reached a boiling point when, on the day of Christmas, a wrapped present was left on her doorstep. Her parents had the obvious concern when the strange package was left unannounced, but that eventually passed.

The Williams household wasn't exactly normal when it came to Christmas traditions, or any holiday for that matter. Instead of the typical day filled with merriment and family bonding, Christmas was mostly the same as any other day. Kate and Lily were never bounding down the stairs, ecstatic and giggling, save for before they could speak coherently. There weren't lazy mornings and afternoons, spent in front of a fireplace with eggnog. No, there were only minimalistic amounts of gift giving, mostly on the part of Eve, the matriarch, awkward moments, and then finally retreating back to whatever they would normally be doing. Christmas, for all intents and purposes, wasn't a big deal.

So, just like most other December 25th's in Kate's recent memory, the Williams's lazily rolled out of bed and sat in their living room. The two sisters sat next to each other on the floor, Eve on the couch, and Winston in an adjacent armchair, drinking something out of a mug that was decidedly stronger than coffee. Kate shared a look with Lily as they both opened matching cards, sandwiching folds of large bills. They knew it amounted to an attempt at buying affection. Still, they gave obligatory 'thank you's to their parents, one of whom smiled appreciatively and the just other sat, contemplating his own thoughts in silence, apart from the occasional, malcontented grumble.

Soon after, the two girls were about to walk outside to start shoveling the few inches of snow on the driveway and sidewalk; but sitting on the concrete in front of the house, was a festively wrapped, fairly sizeable box. Curiously, the older of the two bent down to pick it up and took note of the small tag with Sharpie'd on letters, spelling out 'Kate' as the recipient, and no name given for whomever left it there.

The two were standing in the doorway, looking quizzically at the present, when a commanding voice hollered, "What is it?". His tone was belligerent, as it often was. The girls jumped at the sound.

"I-I…I don't know." Kate stuttered in a squeak, answering on behalf of the two of them, as the eldest.

"Well bring it here." Winston ordered, brokering no argument. Kate brought the box over as Lily shut the door. The senior of the sisters obediently handed her father (so called, despite barely earning the title) the gift. He took it brashly and set about examining it while Kate took a seat on the couch, but on the complete opposite end from her mother. The man shook the thing about, trying to decipher the contents.

Just as he had his fingers poised to tear into the wrapping-paper, his wife forcefully took it from his clutches, admonishing him with a call of his name. The woman handed the appropriate addressee the present.

"Eve!" he exclaimed gruffly, "It could be…laced with anthrax!". She responded with a glare, one that she passed on to her offspring quite faithfully. It wasn't something he challenged lightly.

As Winston sat back in his chair resentfully, murmuring something about a lack of respect or some such horse crap, Eve turned back to Kate and said "Go ahead sweetheart".

The package sat in her lap and she looked at it almost like she wasn't sure what she was expected to do with it. She looked up to see the expectant staring of the other two females and something similar, but more akin to frustrated concentration coming from her father. She once again gazed at the gift, and started at the folded corners of the wrapping-paper. It wasn't a perfectly done job. There were visible rips on the edges and it showed the marring of being taped and re-taped a few times over.

As Kate neatly peeled the adhesive and unfolded the cover, she revealed a plain white box, unmarked in any way. She flipped open the top and inside was an expanse of blue fabric and a zipper. She lifted it out, leaving the cardboard and paper to slide onto the floor, and the cloth unfolded into a cotton hoodie, bearing a striking resemblance to one that she…already had. It was slightly smaller, probably meant to be in her size, and had a bit of an orange-yellow design on the cuff of the left sleeve. She brought it closer to make out the image, and it turned out to be her name, custom stitched on with a rather intricate and elegant 'K'.

Lily looked awed and Kate had an idea why. They both knew where her original sweater had come from, and more precisely, whom. All the possible words for the moment turned to peanut butter in her mouth, but that was fine. She didn't have anything to say to anyone in that room. There was a disinterested huff from the armchair, but other than that, silence.

It was broken by Lily. "Kate, there's a card" she quietly announced, pointing to a white, halved paper on the floor with the rest of the wrapping. Kate leaned down to grab it. There were no distinguishable marks on the outside, but on the interior was a simple note.

" _Dear Kate,  
I hope this hoodie keeps you as warm as your friendship has always done me._

 _-Humphrey"_

Her mind went blank. Who else would have done something like this? Of course it was him. Of course he would be the sweetest, nicest guy ever, and not even wait around to hear the gratification. She took the article of clothing and the card to her room and came back down, having exchanged her previous jacket for the blue one.

She and Lily quit the house, but once they were outside, Kate said to her sister, "I have to run to Humphrey's really fast. I'll be right back, just cover for me.". Lily gave an eye roll, but capitulated to the request. Kate hugged her and said her thanks, then set off toward the boy's house, only a short ways up the street.

Humphrey, conversely, had a very different Christmas morning. The sleep, which he was trying to milk every drop of during winter break, was interrupted by a giddy Charlie, shaking him to consciousness and yelling his name. He didn't dare to open his eyes yet, that meant committing to waking up. Charlie stood over him beside his bed, casting a shadow from the light of the window.

"Charlie, I swear to God, there better be a fucking fire." He groaned sleepily, covering his face with his arm.

"No. Sorry to disappoint. _But_ there is a Christmas morning, so get your lazy ass up." She replied, unfazed by the aggravation within his lethargy.

"I hope that I finally get a sister who knows when to screw off this year." Humphrey sighed, though he did comply in starting to sit up and get out of bed. Charlie, either in acquiescence or indignation, exited the room, leaving a tired Humphrey, sitting on his bed in only a t-shirt and his boxers. He got dressed sluggishly and got ready for the day.

As per tradition in the household, Humphrey was going to have to spend his morning and most of the afternoon with his relatives, all very intentionally in their pajamas. He didn't mind it as much as he thought. Paul always called his sister and her family up from Delaware for the day. He actually had a very similar story to that of his children. He and his sister were adopted as well, though they were a bit older when that happened and aren't actually related to each other. That had a lot to do with the reason that he chose to adopt as well, especially so young. When he was 23, he finally had stability in his career, and decided that what he wanted to do was pay it forward. Humphrey still poked fun at him on occasion for not getting a wife first.

Paul's sister, Ellie, was in fact married. Her husband came up with her. She was a few years older and had her own, biological children with him. There was an infant, Nico, who was swaddled in a blanket for the duration of the gathering. They also had a daughter, a young girl by the name of Ashley. She was four _and a half_ years old, as she made sure to correct everyone. She wasn't very talkative, but took a particular liking to Humphrey, for a reason that no one understood.

So like every other time he had seen her in recent years, Humphrey was constantly being trailed by his niece, and if he wasn't, it was because she was _on_ him. The few words that she did speak, though, were usually to him and were almost always sweet, so he allowed her following him, climbing on him, babbling, and the insistence on greeting him with a cheek kiss. It was allowed, but that didn't mean he approved of it. Still, it was way better than the ones Charlie always managed to give a malicious connotation.

He had the task of introducing everyone to Bailey. The behemoth dog must have been intimidating at first glance, but everyone warmed up to her eventually. The first of who was Ashley, who clung to Humphrey's leg as he walked up to the dog slowly and proceeded to pet her. Seeing the big, fluffy thing go from standoffish beast to something close to a comfort blanket in his lap proved to be enough proof to the little girl that Bailey wasn't harmful. They got along pretty well. Besides that, not much changed since the year prior.

The whole ordeal did quickly wear on Humphrey, however. With the constant company of his niece, all the loud singing, the excitement, and whatnot, he eventually had to sneak away from Ashley while she ate breakfast and disappear into his room. There, in safety from the din erupting downstairs, he sat on his bed with his dog and put his head in his hands. He really just wanted to go back to sleep for a while, but he doubted that would go over well.

Sighing, he looked up from his palms and saw his closet door. The more he thought about it, the more clearly he realized that today was in fact Christmas. He got up and walked toward it. He opened the door and inside, exactly where it had been for three months, was his perpetual attachment to Kate, a gift-wrapped box on the carpeted floor.

Humphrey bent over to pick it up and looked at it, lost in contemplation. He remembered exactly what was inside, a blue hoodie, an exact replica of his favorite except a size smaller. He'd even paid to have her name embroidered on the sleeve. He bought it soon after Kate had 'borrowed' his. It had become a sort of game, where he would ask if he could have it back and she would playfully reply 'no'. The sentiment for the gift was between a joke and a real attempt at a thoughtful present.

Now it mocked him and he hated it. He wanted it out of his house, so far away that he would never even imagine that it could still exist. He looked again into the closet. Toward the back but still on the floor was a small, light brown teddy bear with a pink bow on its head. He reached down to grab it. As he held it in his hand, he took in the dust on its fur and the slight fading of its coloring. He hadn't thought about it in years. It was half of the matching set he bought on that field trip in fifth grade. He hadn't even remembered there being another bear. He gave the 'male' counterpart to Kate and kept its mate. It was all supposed to be part of his asking her to be his girlfriend. Of course that plan fell flat on its face when he couldn't even get the words out of his mouth to say 'hi'.

Somehow, this sight didn't anger him as much as the present, but he still didn't want to see it, didn't want to be reminded of his failures. He threw it back into the closet and closed the door. The box was still in hand and now he wanted it gone more than ever. He couldn't just bring himself to throw it away or burn it, like he really wanted to. There was so much behind it that he just wouldn't be able to do it. It still had its value too. That shouldn't just be wasted.

Humphrey seized his backpack and stuffed the box into it. He led Bailey with him downstairs and out the door on a leash under the guise of 'taking the dog for a walk'. Ashley wanted to come, but he still needed to be alone for a little while longer, just until this was over. He told her that it was too cold for her to be walking with him and weathered her pouts as he left. He'd certainly crossed her a little bit, but it had to be done.

He trekked in the snow, wishing all the while that he could take his car, but people would notice the noise. He'd already lied; he couldn't go back on it now. It took about 15 minutes with the snow confounding his steps, but he made it to Kate's house. He would ring the doorbell, but he really just wanted to get this over with and didn't need to add talking to her. He placed it unceremoniously on porch, protected from the falling perspiration by the awning above the door, turned, and walked right back home. Finally, he could actually start moving on with his life.

That was the plan of course, until his own doorbell chimed a few minutes after he had just finished opening presents with his family.

"I've got it" he said, standing up from the floor. Ashley looked at him expectantly with her arms raised above her head.

"Pick me up" she demanded, looking at him with a scowl. She was still a little fussy because Humphrey had left her. Deciding it not worth the complaining she would give, he hefted her up under the arms and set her on his right hip. She seemed to take after Charlie a lot, actually. He'd have to talk to his sister about her influence on the girl. He carried Ashley with him to the door, meeting Bailey who was already waiting there.

He opened the door with his unburdened hand and standing there, dressed in the hoodie he had literally _just_ given her, was Kate. Her blonde hair was spotted with flurries, as were the rest of her clothes. She stood still, like she expected him to not answer his own door. Her breath was visible in front of her face, which had pink cheeks from the cold. His heart almost leapt out of my chest when he saw her.

"Kate?" He whispered weakly, staring wide eyed at her.

"Humphrey…" she breathed softly, though she followed it up with no other words. There was a pregnant silence for a moment as he was absolutely nowhere near prepared to say anything to her. Luckily, someone else had very little apprehension towards it.

"Humphwey, who's this?" Ashley asked curiously, pointing a finger at her while the other arm was hooked around his, her thumb in her mouth. Humphrey shook himself out of his daze and addressed his niece.

"Ashley, this…uh…this is Kate. Kate, this is my niece Ashley." he announced, still unsure about the situation. The little girl gave her warmest smile and then giggled squeakily.

"She's pretty" She announced unabashedly. He looked at her strangely, but nodded.

"Yes, she is" he agreed awkwardly. He looked at Kate, expecting that he might receive some sort of reaction at his admission, but she seemed just as shocked as he was. Ashley giggled some more. "What?" Humphrey asked her.

"Humphwey, is she your girlfriend?" she blurted, having no awareness of her audacity. Humphrey blanched at her comment, but then looked at her sternly.

"No" he firmly answered, "Ash, I think you should go play with your new toys". She looked offended as he removed her from his side and set her on the ground. From there, she glared up at her uncle, but he returned the same look. She harrumphed and turned back to Kate. Her face softened. Before Humphrey could tell her to leave again, she stepped outside and hugged Kate by the waist.

"I like you, you're pretty" told her, before sticking her tongue out at Humphrey and walking back inside, followed by Bailey who seemed to be making sure that she stayed there.

"Sorry about her. She's only four." he said on her behalf.

"And a half!" came from inside the house. He ignored it. Kate blinked back into reality.

"It's okay" she said, smiling warmly. Her expression died down, however. That scared Humphrey. He really wasn't up for a serious conversation. "Humphrey…why did you give me this?" she asked, pinching the azure fabric between two fingers. He didn't want to answer that question.

"I'm sorry. Do you not like it?" he returned, artfully dodging it.

"I-I love it, thank you, but…why?" she continued, ignoring his wish to leave everything without explanation or definition. She looked distraught, rather than angry or generally curious. He upset her. He decided on a simple answer, one that wouldn't do any further damage.

"I got it a long time ago, because I thought you'd like it" he replied curtly. He couldn't do this. Emotional upheaval was not something he wanted to happen in front of his family, especially not on Christmas.

"Oh…" she sighed, as though that was not quite the answer she was looking for. She didn't know what she was hoping for exactly, but that didn't exactly meet her expectations. She looked awkwardly at his bare feet and the pajamas hanging loosely around his ankles, thinking about what else she wanted to say. She knew that there was something, but not exactly what it was.

Humphrey didn't have what he would need to deal with Kate right then. It was too much and too sudden. He remembered the bear again, its pink bow and its resemblance making it a perfect counterpart to the one Kate still had. Well, she at least still had it a few months ago. He didn't know why, but he hoped she hadn't thrown it out.

That thought was the last straw. He wanted nothing to do with any of this anymore. "Hang on" he said as he closed the door, though not completely. Kate heard him walk away and running footsteps go up the stairs. A few moments later, the sound returned and the door flew open again, revealing Humphrey again, though slightly more red-faced.

He inhaled in preparation and raised his arm from his side. In his hand was a small, plush bear, the exact size and almost the exact color as the one he had given her so many years ago. How had she not noticed it in his hand before that second? It was a perfect complement for hers, though instead of a blue bowtie around its neck, it had a pink bow on its head. They were a matching set.

His hand stretched the bear out to her and she took it in her hands, the softness and texture of the fur very familiar to her. She glanced up at Humphrey, who took the chance to speak.

"I thought of you when I saw this a little while ago." He said, not entirely lying. When he saw it that morning, he did think of her, and it was only a little while ago. He just couldn't take another chance at finding it again. He wanted everything he had with her and the scars they left to be done and over with. Kate looked puzzled.

"I-I…" she started, but words never came to finish that thought. She peaked from his face, down to the bear's and back up again several times, like she was making some sort of decision. She seemed so surprised.

He was a hell of a lot more surprised than she was, however, because the next thing Kate did was take a step through the threshold, fist her hand in the front of his shirt, and pull him down to crash her lips into his.

The first thing that went through his mind was panic. He had absolutely no idea what was happening and could hardly remember where he was exactly. The next thing was that he was utterly dumbfounded. The last thing he expected was for Kate to come to his house after he left the present. He hadn't even put his name on the box. On top of that, he didn't even think it was in the realm of possibility that he would ever get to actually kiss her as anything more than a helpful friend.

As this was all happening, though, he realized that his dream was kinda coming true. He'd always wanted to kiss Kate. Her soft, pink lips were always so close, but simultaneously so unattainable. He'd thought about what they were like more times then he'd care to admit. And now, there she was, wanting to kiss _him_. He'd only really been kissed like this by Lily and that was more or less a drunk, sloppy mess. Never the less, he had some idea of what he was doing and let himself just be consumed by it.

He stopped thinking, closed his eyes, and just let his hands fall to her hips. She melted into him, her back arching so that she leaned upward, pressing into his chest, as she stood on the tips of her toes to meet him. Her free hand came up to cup his neck and her thumb grazed the corner of his jaw. She could feel the slight stubble on his skin, the warmness of his mouth, and the feeling of having him so close to her. She reveled in it.

They stood there for what felt like hours, lips locked together and moving ever so gently in tandem. It seemed like their breathing was synchronized as they just took everything about the moment in, committing it to memory. There were electric shocks passing over both of their nerves, streaking through their bodies. Kate knew that this was different to when she kissed Hutch. There was so much more substance to it.

Kate was the one to pull away first, though Humphrey followed her with his mouth, before he realized it. They broke from their reverie, breathing softly mere inches from each other. His eyes looked glazed over, like he was drunk off of their passion. She had a small smile on her lips, though she was happier in that moment than she had ever been. It had only been maybe twenty seconds in reality, but it surpassed all the joy she had experienced throughout her entire life to that point. He actually kissed her back. He wanted it too.

"Merry Christmas" she said softly, as she turned and began trudging back to her house through the snow.

"Merry Christmas" he murmured, though she couldn't have heard it over the wind and distance. He closed the door behind her and looked back into his house. Everybody in the room was staring at him. He felt like there was an actual spotlight on him and he froze. He must have been imagining the crickets chirping. No one, not even Bailey moved. Then, Ashley stood.

"Heyyyy!" she yelled, affronted by something, judging by the placement of her hands on her hips, "I thought you said she wasn't your girlfriend". He was still cemented in place, but everyone else burst into uproarious laughter. He turned a shade of red that would have made tomatoes jealous. It was not going to be fun deadpanning any conversation for the next five hours, and then Charlie as going to be insufferable after that. Oh God…

 **A/N: So what'd you think? I don't know, but I like mini-Charlie. She's even more fun for me to play with. I'm still experimenting with my writing style, so that's why this is in third person. Also, I messed up my poll a little while ago where it wasn't actually on my profile. I fixed it, so it is now. Please vote. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	20. Seeing Red

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 20 _Seeing Red_

 **A/N: First of all, I owe a thank you to Squid84, who I forgot to mention last chapter. He suggested the bear as a gift. Secondly, this chapter contains lyrics from the song** _ **Impossible**_ **by Shontelle, which I claim no ownership of. If you would like to hear what it might sound like with a voice similar to Humphrey's, look for a cover of it done by James Arthur. You don't have to listen to it or read it. If you just understand that it is a sad song with romantic context, you'll get the gist.**

 **Lastly, and this is pretty important, this is not a happy story. In fact, far from it. This is absolutely the darkest chapter I've written yet and probably the lowest point of the entire story. If you don't think you can handle that, please don't continue reading.**

 **Fav Review**

" **Well well well, I don't think charlie is the only one getting herpes this holiday season."**

 **-RainbowToasterCake**

(Third Person POV)

(January 5th, 2015)

Humphrey hadn't seen Kate since Christmas morning and he was absolutely fine with that. He had only been showing her apathy until then, but now he was unafraid to transparent. He was irate. Where did she get off kissing him? What gave her the right? What kind of sadistic, manipulative, narcissistic bitch would just assume that after everything she put him through, he would grant her that?

Kate had fouled his mood for all of winter break. At first, the only unpleasant things that followed were the jeers of his family, the worst of which being Charlie's. Actually, Bailey's might have been worse still. She kept giving him these looks, as if she just _knew_. But soon after that, the 'love-sick' fog, for lack of better words, that settled over his brain dissipated. He thought about what had transpired and the more time he spent doing that, the more contemptuous he felt.

Sure, he had given her a Christmas present, completely out of the blue. That did count well enough as a show of good will, but all it merited was a polite 'thank you', not getting mouth-raped. That's exactly what it was too.

Admittedly, he did enjoy it, a lot in fact. In reality, it was the best twenty seconds of his life, but only until it was over. After, he saw the affection for what it was. Kate was double-dipping. She already had her boyfriend and as far as Humphrey knew, they were still together. So, she was cheating and using Humphrey to do so. For what reason, he had no idea, but that didn't matter. All that he needed to know was that she was abusing his kindness and his friendship for her own…sick desires.

Of course, there was a small voice in the back of his mind that tried to suppose that she might have actually meant it, that she might have actually felt something for him. Sure, there was that faintest of possibilities, but it wasn't at all likely. Humphrey's fury overshadowed this idea exponentially. She had most of her life to make a move toward him, show the slightest bit of interest, so there was no reason that she would start then. Now, she wasn't afforded the opportunity to try any longer.

Humphrey went to school fuming. Every class he shared with Kate he spent pointedly ignoring her, or shooting venomous glares when she wasn't looking. He left no room for her to explain anything and didn't intend to change that. She didn't deserve that grace after what she had done to him, the way she toyed with his emotions.

The most infuriating part of the whole idea was that he only gave her those gifts because he never wanted to see them again. He wanted every memento and token of their long dead friendship to be gone and forgotten. And if he wasn't some sentimental, masochistic idiot, he would have just thrown them in the dumpster and been over with it. But no, he just couldn't throw them away and he just had to give them to her.

Kate determined to not be forgotten though. She was compelled, beyond the reasoning of months of silence between them, to walk over to his house and…attack him in the doorway. He hated that Christmas day, the worst in most recent memory. He especially hated how soft he remembered her lips being, how warm her embrace was as compared to the brisk wind coming through the open door, and how impossibly right it felt in that moment. He couldn't stand that as much as he loathed the day, he wanted that kiss. He'd wanted it for the entire length of time he'd known her.

Humphrey brooded over these thoughts every passing moment since that day. Even being back in school, all that he managed to accomplish was putting his head on the desk and getting even more worked up. By lunch, he just needed some quiet time, alone. He'd been around the droning of the other pompous, entitled students in the school all day, and he just needed to be around the one person who he could stand for any measurable length of time, himself.

He sat in the west wing with his elbows on his knees and his hands in his hair. Lily, the only person who he might have an interest in talking to, came by as she usually did, but she noticed his abnormal behavior.

"Humphrey, you okay?" she asked, crouching down to his level. Sometimes, she felt like the only real friend he had left. She was always there for him and never expected anything of him. She never judged and never looked at him like there was anything different about him.

"I'm fine." He answered gruffly. He was ill-tempered, but she hadn't earned his scorn, so he did his best not to aim it at her. He did huff to himself as he noticed the return of that damned phrase, yet again.

"Are you s…" she began, but stopped when Humphrey looked up to give her an icy stare. It was accentuated by his bloodshot eyes and whitish pallor. He looked sad, almost broken. She relented. Lily gave him a quick hug, a slightly awkward one due to his position up against a wall on the floor, but she wasn't deterred. He didn't return the gesture, but he did appreciate it, even if it didn't show. After she let go, Lily stood back up and walked away. He definitely did not seem in the mood for company.

Humphrey sighed when she left. He was alienating the only friend he had left, the only one that seemed like she cared about him for no other reason than because he was himself. All of this was because of Kate, but he just didn't know how to do anything else. He could only sit by himself and mope.

Eventually, he got tired of replaying every conversation he'd had with Lily and her sister. He couldn't stand feeling so wronged and so at fault at the same time. In an attempt to clear his thoughts, he breathed deeply, closed his eyes and rested his head on his arms. Sleep evaded him, however. He couldn't get away from both his guilt and anger. In a final try at reprieve, he did what he normally did when he couldn't handle his own thoughts. He sang. He didn't sing particularly loud or forcefully, just some quiet notes that seemed so appropriate to his situation.

 _I remember years ago, someone told me I should take caution when it comes to love. I did._

 _And you were strong and I was not. My illusion, my mistake. I was careless, I forgot. I did._

The hallway was still and silent. For once, his thoughts were as well. The doors were closed, locking in the darkness of empty classrooms and there were far off murmurs from the cafeteria. Humphrey couldn't hear them though. He was in his own world.

 _And now, when all is done, there is nothing to say. You have gone and so effortlessly._

 _You have won. You can go ahead. Tell them._

A chill went up his spine and his skin was stippled with goosebumps. He felt cold and alone. The worst part is that a lot of it was his fault.

 _Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops. Write it on the skyline. All we had is gone now._

 _Tell them I was happy and my heart is broken. All my scars are open. Tell them what I hoped would be_

 _impossible, impossible, impossible, impossible._

Humphrey sang, bleeding out all of his emotions into the rhythm and melodies of the music. He put all of his heart into it and soon his eyes were rimmed with tears. He wouldn't let them fall, though. He didn't have the energy for crying. He was too empty for that.

Little did he know that at the other end of the hallway and just around the bend of a corner he had an audience. His voice carried through the corridor and rang out at the other end. By the time it got there, it was passing over the ears of a classmate of his, one with flaxen hair and amber eyes.

Kate was walking from her fifth period class to her locker. She usually would go straight to the cafeteria, but she couldn't really handle a crowd of people right then. Most of all, she didn't want to go to her table. Sure, Sam and Candy were there and they were pretty good friends. Charlie stopped coming though and Lily did too eventually. The table was also filled with a new group of people. They were supposedly friends, but she couldn't think of anything that made her want to be around them, other than it felt like she was supposed to be. They were captains on varsity teams and members of the student council, but none of them seemed like real people to her.

Then of course, there was Hutch. Hutch was just someone who went to her school that she was supposedly dating. She felt nothing other than indifference toward him. Every conversation was hollow and every glance carried no weight, except for when he blatantly stared at her chest, unconcerned with the fact that everyone could see it. She crossed her arms, scowled at him, but stuck with it, because he was the boyfriend that every girl in her school should have wanted. He was everything _she_ should have wanted, but she just didn't. So, on the first day back from winter break, she just needed a little more time before she could go back to all of _that_.

When she was taking deliberately small steps through the halls, that's when she heard a small voice. It was low and quiet, but enticing all the same. She followed it through the maze of hallways as she could hear herself approaching the source. As she turned into the west wing, she saw it, or rather him. Humphrey. He was sitting alone, his face to the ceiling and his eyes closed.

Kate quickly ducked back behind the corner. She hadn't spoken to him about what happened on Christmas. She had no idea what to say. It was almost like an experiment really. She had been wondering for a long time if what she had with Hutch was all she could hope for, if the emotionless kisses were all there was to be had.

But she was wrong. The few moments she spent with Humphrey were electrifying. She didn't know why, but it eclipsed every touch she had ever felt in her entire life. The best part was that she meant it too. She wanted to kiss _him_ , Humphrey, and no one else. It felt dangerous and risky, not only because she was still technically with Hutch, but because she had no idea how he would respond. That made her all the more ecstatic when he wrapped his arms around her and leaned into it. When she left, she practically skipped back to her house, despite how much she tried to suppress her sheer giddiness.

And now she was hearing him like she never had before. Kate didn't even know he sang, let along how entrancingly well. As she stood out of sight, she felt exhilarated that she got this insight into him that she never had before. She relished every note, every change in pitch that came from his chest. She could even imagine how it must've been vibrating and what that would feel like with her ear pressed directly to it.

Only after this sudden rush died down, did she actually pay attention to what specifically he was singing. It was…well it was kind of a love song, but decidedly sadder. She listened closely.

 _Falling out of love is hard. Falling for betrayal is worse._

 _Broken trust and broken hearts, I know. I know._

 _Thinking all you need is there, building faith on love and words._

 _Empty promises will wear, I know. I know._

'Love?' Kate thought. Who could Humphrey have loved? She had never even heard him talk about a girl in all the years she'd known him. Did he have a girlfriend she didn't know about? Why does he sound so hurt? A balloon swelled in her chest at the thought of this hypothetical girl, but it threatened to burst at her next thoughts. What if he was singing about her? Had she hurt him somehow? She'd never thought that could have happened.

No, she pushed those thoughts from her mind. It couldn't have been her. She hardly ever spoke to him. She couldn't have had that much of an effect on him. He must have been singing about someone else. Or maybe he just liked the song. Still, he sounded as if he meant every word he sang. There was so much sadness behind each line. Kate couldn't take it anymore. It felt like something she was not supposed to be hearing.

She tiptoed away from her hiding place and once out of a range where he might hear, ran off. She had to get away. That was too much to handle. She was trying to get as far away from the sound as she could, and hopefully the thoughts that came with it. His singing was amazing though. It felt like it went straight to her heart and made it beat in time with the melody. It inspired a lot of emotions, her least favorite of which being a twinge of guilt. Still she blocked that out.

What Kate didn't refuse to accept, though, was that there was certainly something wrong with Humphrey. This was the epitome of everything she had seen from him in the past few months. From day one of school, he wasn't the same as she knew him. He had these fits, was much quieter that he used to be, and he pushed people away. That was not the Humphrey that used to be her friend. After the first couple of weeks, it seemed to be getting better, but then, for no reason that she could see, everything took a turn for the worse. He hardly ever spoke a word, avoided seemingly all human contact, and receded into himself. He was unwell in some way she didn't know.

Just as this crossed her mind, she walked past the cafeteria and someone coming out of it. It was someone she thought might actually know what was going on with Humphrey, Charlie. Kate made a beeline for her.

"Charlie!" Kate called, trying to get the girl's attention. She turned her head and waved casually.

"Hey Kate. What's up?" Charlie answered, stopping just outside the doors to the lunch room. The noise coming out of it was loud and it was filled to the brim with kids. There were too many. Kate intended a private conversation and was going to get that wish. She grabbed the girl by the arm and tugged her down the hall opposite the one she came from. "Ah! Kate? What the hell are you doing?" Charlie shouted in protest. Kate held a finger to her lips and shushed her. Once they were secluded to an acceptable degree, Kate stopped and faced her captive.

"What's wrong with Humphrey?" she blurted, giving no explanation as to the context of the vague question.

"What?" the older girl asked.

Kate repeated, "What's wrong with your brother? He's…acting weird.". She looked seriously at her, demanding the answer in an almost threatening way. Her eyes were squinted predatorily.

"I don't know. Maybe he's sick or something. Why don't you go ask him?" the older girl responded sarcastically.

"No, I mean there is something _wrong_ with him. He's been acting weird all year, not like he used to." the blonde continued. Charlie's eyes bulged after a moment in some sort of realization, but then she made an obvious effort to hide it.

"I don't know what you're talking about" she answered. She was acting suspicious and Kate saw through it.

"Charlie…" she admonished, glaring as pointedly as she could. She crossed her arms and watched as the other girl grew apparently more and more nervous.

"No…I-I really don't…" Charlie tried again, but she looked as though she was going to turn and run away any moment.

"Charlie…" Kate scolded again, this time with more severity permeating through her voice.

"Kate, he…he told me not to tell. I can't." the brunette said, almost like a plea. She looked weak and Kate knew she would crack.

"Tell who?" she prodded. The other girl's eyes darted from left to right before they came to rest, looking at the fiery stare in front of her.

"He told me not to tell _you_ " Charlie resigned. The blood drained from Kate's face. Why would Humphrey single her out so specifically? What was so worth hiding that Charlie needed to be sworn to silence in order to keep it from her?

Shaking, Kate scrounged up the courage to ask her next question. She was honestly scared of what it might be. "Charlie, please…" she asked, much softer than her previous onslaught of questions. Charlie looked up and saw the desperate look and genuine concern the girl held. She looked down as she made her decision and then resolved to look up at the blonde again.

"Kate…Humphrey is dealing with really bad depression. He has been for three years." Charlie confessed. Kate's expression was grave. Numerous emotions ran across her face. They ranged from sympathy, to general sadness, and even guilt. She felt horrible that as his best friend, she stopped talking to him altogether, that she let him deal with everything all by himself. A question nagged at her brain, though.

"H-Has he ever tried to…" she choked on the words. She wasn't dumb. She knew what the result of such mental illnesses was in so many cases. She wasn't one to not have the stomach for such a topic, but when it was the quiet, friendly boy she had known all of her life and had been her best friend, she couldn't get the words out of her mouth to ask the question. Charlie seemed as taxed by the conversation as Kate. She looked dejectedly at the ground.

"I don't know. I-I…he doesn't talk to me anymore." She admitted. She sounded like she was guilt ridden, as though she thought it was all her fault, as if had she been a better sister, he wouldn't have to go through all he did.

Kate couldn't stand there anymore. She rushed off, passed Charlie, and made her way to the bathroom. Only once she got there and looked in the mirror did she realize that she had wet streaks running down her face. She choked back a sniffle and wiped the tears with the back of her hand. She couldn't be crying. Crying was ugly, and pathetic, and a show of weakness. If nothing else, Kate was strong. She got it all out of her system right there and then. Once she had exhausted her tears and sobs, she cleaned up her makeup and washed her face. She was not going to be seen in that state.

She made it to class and took her seat next to Humphrey, who had taken his usual positon with his head on the desk. He was asleep, oblivious to everything that had been said about him. She could remember how sickly he looked all of the time and how he seemed so drained. She thought that she would be tired too after everything he must have to deal with. She couldn't even imagine his pain. Her vision blurred again slightly and she exiled those thoughts from her mind. There would be no crying in class. She focused on the teacher, the blackboard, her textbook, anything but the boy in the seat next to her.

Humphrey did little else but sleep for the rest of the day, even getting himself excused from gym class so he could sleep on the bleachers. He hadn't made a sound since then. His voice echoed in Kate's head, though, taking up any possible space for other thoughts. All she could think about was how pained and defeated he sounded. She did also think about how beautiful the sound was, albeit miserable. She felt so touched by it. She was never supposed to hear it, the forbidden fruit that tasted all the more sweet because of it.

It was so much for Kate to handle and she had no idea how. She felt like she didn't even know him anymore. How did he keep something that…monumental from her? Why did he feel the need to? She wished she had asked Charlie that question. The more she thought about it, however, the more she wanted that answer from his mouth. She wanted to hear everything right from the epicenter. She was angry in a way that he was keeping this a secret. She remembered him saying that he just couldn't tell her. Well it wasn't that he couldn't tell her; it was that he wouldn't. After all that she had confided with him over the years, he never trusted her enough. She felt like their whole friendship was a lie.

She snapped out of a daze of thoughts to realize that she was the only one left in the locker room after gym class, and that she still wasn't dressed. She quickly changed into her clothes and stormed off to confront Humphrey. She needed answers. He promised her that he would tell her what was wrong with him eventually. Now the offer was overdue, and Kate was going to get an explanation.

Kate was fuming as she walked through the hallways to her locker. Along the way, Lily had managed to join her, though Kate was oblivious to her presence. She had her eyes set ahead of her, to the person standing in front of the locker adjacent to hers. When she reached him, she grabbed his shoulder roughly and spun him around to face her. He stumbled a bit, but Kate didn't care.

"What the fuck Humphrey?!" she roared. She didn't know why she was so angry. She said it was because he never trusted her, but it felt like more than that. She had a lot of emotions at the moment. Anger was just talking the loudest.

Lily reached out for her arm and said "Kate?". Her sister only shrugged off her touch and looked back at Humphrey, who had only then regained his footing.

"How could you not tell me?" she interrogated. Humphrey looked her up and down, his brows knit together in confusion.

"Tell you what?" he replied, also annoyed by the sudden aggression.

"How could you not tell me after three years that you were _depressed_?!". Humphrey stood still, eyes wide in surprise. Lily mirrored the expression and turned to look at the incensed Kate beside her. The rest of the students in the hallway sensed that they could quickly become collateral damage and scattered.

"Who…who said that?" Humphrey returned, trying to act stern, but faltering at first. There was no way she could have figured that out by herself. Who had betrayed him? Before he could answer, Charlie came running into the hallway, following the sound of shouting. "Charlie?" he asked, grasping her attention. His sister gasped as she saw the situation before her and came running down to meet them. Humphrey didn't know how to react. Soon the answer came to him, though. He was enraged. "You…you little shit!" he bellowed at her. She stopped in her tracks a few feet away. "I said one thing. One thing! That you couldn't do, Charlie, you backstabbing bitch!". His voice ricocheted off the walls and made the three girls freeze in their tracks. They had never seen him so angry. Humphrey, in the time that they had known him, had either been cheery and happy-go-lucky, or just silent. Now, he looked ready to explode.

He turned to Kate. "Any _you_! Where do you get off telling me what I can and can't tell you? I don't have to tell you jack shit, and I certainly wouldn't now. What gives you the right to go behind my back, snooping into my life?" he thundered, leaving the girl blinking in astonishment. She lost all of the strength in her voice.

"Humphrey…why couldn't you tell me? Did you think…" she started, but he angrily cut her off.

"I didn't think a fucking thing about you, especially after you ditched me for the first guy who looks at you. Maybe if you weren't so caught up in yourself, you would have realized.". Kate felt like she had been punched in the stomach by a heavyweight boxer. She knew that she wasn't a popular topic on everyone's mind, but there was something about his rejection of her that wounded her. She was hurt, but that turned into ire as well. She was not going to stand there and be insulted by him.

"Well maybe if you had actually _talked_ to someone once in a while, you would have realized that one of them might give a rat's ass about you, but believe me, I won't make that mistake twice." She responded, seething just as much as Humphrey was.

"It's not like you ever did. The most you ever did for me was give me a headache.". Kate's lip curled in frustration. She could practically feel the steam coming out of her ears.

"You're an asshole!" she shouted at him, stepping closer to yell directly into his face. Humphrey shoved her squarely in the shoulders, pushing her back forcefully.

"And you're a two cent slut! I'm surprised you didn't jump all over Garth at first chance." He spat her. It was harsh and tasted bitter on his tongue, but he made no apologies for it. It looked like it took a moment for his words to register with Kate, although the other two girls collectively gasped. In an instant, Kate went from angry to furious. She took a step forward, cocked her fist back, and threw at Humphrey's face. It landed on his cheek and sent him reeling to the floor, thrown off balance by his backpack.

"Maybe if you're such good friends with Garth, you should listen to what he said and just kill yourself. You'd be doing me a favor." Kate hissed at the boy who was sprawled on the floor. As soon as it left her, however, Kate clapped a hand over her mouth. She regretted it the instant she said it and tried to apologize, but the words turned to cotton in her mouth. She could only stare in silence at Humphrey's face. He looked like she'd tortured him for months on end, but all in a matter of seconds. It drove an icicle through her chest. It must have been some sort of instant karma, her just punishment. There was only silence in the hallway as no one spoke.

Humphrey's mouth was agape for a moment, and Kate was pretty sure that she saw his lip quiver slightly, but it quickly snapped shut, his jaw clenched and his lips a tight line. He got up slowly, not saying a word as he did so. Kate tried yet again, but futilely, to apologize or beg for forgiveness or even just for him to say _something_ to her. He didn't even grant her that. He got up and started walking down the hall, away from everybody else. The three girls exchanged looks of shock. Kate's eyes threatened to water again.

Charlie took off after her brother and caught up to him just as he was leaving the double doors to the parking lot.

"Are you alright?" she asked as she walked with him to his car.

"I'm fine." He muttered, but his voice waivered. She chose to ignore that. They got in the car and drove in silence.

Humphrey had lost all of the anger in his eyes. It was replaced by only sadness. Charlie had no idea what that must have felt like. He already had enough trouble as it was, but for _Kate_ to say that, it must have been devastating. She knew what that girl had meant to him and she couldn't help but feel sorry for him. She also couldn't help the guilt that formed a lump in her throat. If she hadn't said anything to Kate, if she had just been able to keep her mouth shut, Humphrey wouldn't have had to go through that. She messed this up for him.

"I'm sorry…" she murmured quietly, looking at her hands in her lap. It drew Humphrey's attention. He looked over to her, but Charlie couldn't look at him. She felt so vile.

Humphrey still didn't say anything, but he slowly took his hand off of the steering wheel and gently grabbed Charlie's in it. Her head shot up to look at him. His face was unreadable, but his hand was so comforting and reassuring in hers. He didn't say it, but she hoped that meant that he forgave her.

In truth, Humphrey was still outraged, but Charlie didn't need that. She was quiet and when she is quiet, she's usually pretty upset. Despite still feeling betrayed and crossed, he offered her that comfort. He really didn't have the energy to be mad at her. He was just so incredibly done with everything. He didn't care anymore.

Eventually, he took his hand away and returned it to the wheel. They made it home, still in a thick silence. As Humphrey stepped through the threshold Charlie followed him and suddenly felt brave enough to ask him again.

"Humphrey, are you sure you're okay?" she probed, still feeling guilty as all hell. He heaved a great sigh but nodded curtly. His face was still blank though. It worried her. He looked so distant. "You don't look okay." she added, though she wished she hadn't. When she usually asks a question repeatedly, it sets him off. It's rarely her intention, but she repeats the pattern regardless. She was surprised though when he didn't react with any indication of annoyance.

"Actually, I could really use some ice cream. I don't really feel like driving. Could you run to the store?" he requested plainly. Charlie looked at him strangely, thinking that he would have asked for anything else before that.

"Ice cream?" she echoed inquiringly. Out of all things, he wanted ice cream? After all that happened today?

"Mhm" he confirmed. Charlie stared at him for a moment more before acquiescing.

"Okay…sure, ice cream. I can do that." She said, turning around and starting back through the door. She looked over her shoulder before she left and his face was just as placid as ever. She continued out and shut the door.

Above all else, Humphrey was tired. It wasn't just the longing for sleep kind of tired, though he could nap for about a year. No, he was tired of everything. He was tired of waking up and barely having the energy to move until he pumped his veins full of caffeine. He was tired of the headaches that accompanied him every morning and stayed with him until he went to sleep. He was tired of not being able to feel anything for another person besides contempt or just absolute nothingness. He was tired of the panic attacks and the constant worrying. He was tired of feeling like nothing was ever going to be any different for him.

He realized that it wasn't going to get better either. He was just going through the motions every day and weathering his life, just to do the same later on. What was the point in worrying about college now, so that he could worry in college about his major, so he could worry about getting a job, so he can worry about retirement in an endless cycle of anxiety? Why would he go through all of that just to go through it again? At no point would he get any relief. So, he reasoned that there was no end-game, no reason to trudge through it all.

Charlie would have to walk to the nearest store. That left him about forty five minutes to do everything he needed to. The first thing he did was put Bailey in her crate. She would just make things more difficult. After that, he was a blur, running through the house to gather thing and put them in place. He filled the bathroom sink half way with cold water, went down stairs, and grabbed the ice box to fill the rest of it. Then he was grabbing a pen, gathering three pieces of paper, and setting them on his desk.

Soon after, he was back in the bathroom, soaking his arms in the frigid water up to his elbows. Within minutes, the color had faded from them and he could no longer feel his fingers when they touched his forearms. With numb hands, he pulled out his phone and dialed three numbers into the keypad. It rang twice before getting picked up.

"Nine-one-one, what is your emergency?" a woman asked from the other line. She sounded middle aged and bored.

He answered briefly, "I need an ambulance. There is a 16 year old male named Humphrey Wilson at 83 Centennial Avenue with multiple lacerations. The door is unlocked and there is a dog in a crate.". Then he hung up, having given all of the appropriate information. Humphrey was so exhausted that he just wanted the ordeal over it. Before he knew it, his trusty pocket knife was in his hand. It wasn't extremely noticeable, but he could feel the difference in friction as the blade, kept meticulously sharp, bit into the skin and flesh of his wrist. He cringed as he felt the tissue tear against the metal, but he pressed the knife harder, leaving no room for hesitation. The last thing he wanted was to mess this up. He couldn't feel anything, but before the chill of the ice water had time to wear off, he switched hands and repeated the action on his right wrist, just as deep.

He set the knife down and looked at his hands. There was blood trickling down his fingers and diluting in the sink, but he didn't feel it. He could only see the bright red as it crossed his skin. He knew there was no going back, but he was okay with that. He wasn't struggling or fighting against it. He was happy to be done with everything. He wasn't scared at all. He wasn't sure if there was anything after death, probably nothing, but that didn't frighten him. If this was ultimate finality, he was just happy to go out on his own terms.

Soon he felt a little light-headed. His hands were shaking. He took a step back from the sink, but lost his balance and fell against the bathroom wall. He sat on the floor, but he could still only look at his hands. He knew it wouldn't be much longer before he passed out. He felt tired and knew his breathing was slowing. He felt cold, but then again, he was already cold. He was still growing weaker, however. He could faintly hear the ferocious barking of Bailey, who must have known something was wrong. The noise sounded like it was getting farther and farther away. As his vision faded, he did have on final thought, though. He was sorry. He was sorry for what this would do to Charlie…and Lily…and maybe even Kate.

With that in mind, he blacked out.

 **A/N: Take a deep breath. Don't hate me just yet.**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	21. The Blues

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 21 _The Blues_

 **A/N: Sorry I was away for so long. If you care for the explanation, it is at the end. Also, sorry this chapter is a little short.**

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" **Honestly, I had to stop reading for a few minutes before I could work up the courage to continue once I realised where this was headed. The best writers can make you emotionally attached to a character and agree with their decisions even though you think they are wrong. You, good sir, have done this to me and I have thoroughly enjoyed reading up to this point and I am waiting for the next chapter eagerly." –Guest**

(Third Person POV)

(January 5th, 2015)

Lily stormed away from her sister, who was left standing in the hallway, frozen in shock. Kate wasn't entirely sure what just happened. It seemed like a dream but felt so real. She couldn't have actually said that to Humphrey, could she? No, that would be impossible.

She did remember it vividly though. There was an image burned into her eyes. She could see a look of such horror on Humphrey's face that she could swear showed something breaking inside him. She could also feel a lingering pressure on her shoulders. Finally, she looked down at her right hand. There it was, undeniable proof. The second knuckle of her fist was bruised and throbbing. It all really happened. She couldn't deny it any longer. She really said those horrible things and struck the face she had known for most of her life.

Kate's stomach felt like it twisted and turned over. She couldn't believe herself. She might have actually been the biggest bitch on the planet. God, he was sick and she yelled at him like it was his fault. How could she try to blame him for being depressed?

She finally regained the presence of mind to realize that she was still standing alone in the hallway. Lily's heavy, retreating footsteps could be heard a ways away. Kate started after her. She really needed someone like her right then. She caught up to her shortly after they both exited the building. They walked side by side, but the younger of the two refused to look at her sister. She pointedly stared at the sidewalk as they trekked home, scowling absently.

Kate didn't like the silence between them. She couldn't handle it. After everything that just transpired, silence felt so wrong. She felt like screaming her lungs out into the wind until her throat was so raw it bled. She felt like yelling, and sobbing, and begging for forgiveness, all at the same time; so silence…that just wasn't an option.

However, she had no idea what to say. She didn't know where to start. She didn't know if she could even go back to speaking normally after how she spoke to Humphrey. Humphrey…she'd start there. She was concerned about him, so she imagined Lily would be too.

"Do you think he's…" she started, but the other girl cut her off.

"Shut up" Lily gruffly commanded, grinding her teeth together in frustration. She still refused to look at her sister.

"What?" Kate asked, confused by the sudden outburst. Lily never talked to her like that. She couldn't even remember the last time she had seen her sister be legitimately angry with her.

"I said shut up!" She repeated through clenched teeth. Her fists balled of their own volition at her sides. She crossed her arms over her chest and sped up to escape the other girl.

Kate huffed indignantly. What the hell was that about? She wasn't just going to quietly be ignored. She trotted up to meet the girl again with her eyebrows knitted together angrily.

"What's your problem?" she hissed. In an instant, Lily halted her gait and forcibly stopped Kate with her hand.

"What's _my_ problem?! What's _your_ problem, Kate?" she returned, pointing her thin, dagger-like finger into her sister's shoulder.

"Hey…" Kate began, only to be interrupted again.

"No, don't you 'hey' me. And don't you dare ask about Humphrey! After that stunt you pulled, he should hate you. I know I would." The white-haired girl shouted. She had never wanted to hit her sister as much as she did right then, but she didn't. Still, she was going to make her opinions well known.

Kate faltered in her stance. Lily was right and she absolutely deserved what she was hearing, but it hurt. It hurt a lot. She didn't have anyone on her side in this, not even her own family. Hell, she wasn't even on her own side. She hated herself for what she said too. But she had hoped for some kind of comfort from Lily. She didn't have anywhere else to turn for it. She'd been alienating all her friends in favor of her boyfriend, who she can't even stand anymore, and now her sister is giving her a literal cold shoulder. The brisk air stung her eyes and she wished that was the only reason her vision was blurring.

After a moment of silence, she murmured, barely above a whisper "I'm sorry…". She didn't really know who she was talking to. She just stared into the concrete of the sidewalk.

Lily was still disappointed or angry or something in between at her sister, but she could see the toll the ordeal had taken on her. She looked so defeated and genuinely regretful. Lily couldn't just let this go, but she also couldn't be angry while she saw Kate like that. The younger sister's expression visibly softened, though it still held some disdain.

"Don't tell me that. Say it to him." She suggested, trying not to sound as scornful.

At the change in tone, Kate looked up. She held back a sniffle. "Do you think he'd even let me?" she asked. She hated how weak and pitiful she was, but she felt just as small as she sounded.

Lily sighed and looked away from her sister's eyes. That was a loaded question. She didn't know how to answer. Truthfully, she couldn't. There was no way for her to tell what was going through Humphrey's mind. He had never been one to hold a grudge, but this was different. Humphrey is an incredible person, but could anyone really forgive what Kate said?

"I…I don't know." She admitted, as though it were crushing news. It very well might have been. Lily didn't know how she could after everything Kate did, but she felt sorry for her. The whole situation was a mess and no one came out of it on top. Kate looked like she understood what she heard, but she certainly wasn't happily about it. Still, she nodded. Lily realized that Humphrey was not the only one Kate's words had hurt. She inflicted emotional wounds on herself as well. "Come on. Let's get home." Lily said, turning and beginning to continue along their route.

Kate fell into step with her. She was still quiet, though. Out of the corner of her eye, Lily swore she saw her wipe her eyes. That was the final straw. Lily couldn't stand seeing her sister be so miserable. It was getting old. Without saying a word, she hooked her arm around Kate's elbow. She didn't look up at her, though. The gesture was all she was getting from her. It did seem to work at least a little bit as they walked the rest of the way home.

(Time Skip: about 45 minutes later)

Charlie walked briskly back from the nearest 7Eleven, carrying back a pint of vanilla ice cream in a plastic bag. She couldn't get that off her mind. It was such a weird request. He ate the frozen dessert often enough for her to know that plain vanilla is his favorite, but not much more. She had never seen him want it any other time that he was upset, even though it isn't incredibly strange. She was guilty of that herself. Still she couldn't shake a sneaking suspicion of his request. She acquiesced to it regardless.

She tried to focus herself on the task at hand. She was trying to wake home before the ice cream melted. She quickened her pace. She couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, though. Sure, there really was something wrong, Humphrey basically just had his beating heart torn out and stomped on, but that's not what she meant. It was unsettling to her, his even-tempered face when he held her hand in his own, the way he walked and talked so simply and calmly, without shakiness or any sign of distress, and then his outlandish wish for her. She strode faster still.

She continued at her near running pace until she walked around the corner, onto Centennial Avenue. Then, she broke out into a pounding sprint.

It took only a second for it to make sense to Charlie, but it felt like an eternity. As she rounded the bend, she saw flashing blue and red lights glaring back at her. Then she noticed the ambulance they were attached to. She froze for an instant. She had to force herself to make her eyes look to the house in front of which the vehicle was parked. Every fiber in her body resisted, shouting at her that she didn't want to know the answer. Eventually, her gaze tracked right slightly and she saw the blazing red Mustang in the driveway.

Her world came to a halt and her heart leapt into her throat. And in a second, it started back into motion, but at breakneck speed, as if it had to catch up to the time lost. She didn't realize that she was darting along the sidewalk until she hear the grocery back and its contents hit the concrete a few feet behind her.

Just as she was nearing the house, a man in a blue uniform backed out of the front door, pulling something made of bright yellow bars. It was long, this thing, with a white top and something strapped to it. Behind it, trailed another man, bearing the same uniform. They were rushing just as fast as she was. The thing on top of the yellow and white platform didn't move, but it captured her attention. It couldn't be what she thought it was. That was impossible. As she came out of her furious gait, reality finally hit her and it hit her hard. It felt like it nearly crushed her. For the second time in that day, her world came to a crashing halt. Humphrey was lying on a stretcher, motionless, being hauled away frantically by paramedics. He was unconscious.

Charlie screamed, louder than she ever had before, catching the attention of the EMT's. They looked at her, but she paid them no mine. She bolted up to the stretcher and looked at her brother. He didn't even twitch. What did that mean? She couldn't see what was wrong with him, but it looked like he was covered in blood. He was pale too, almost ghostly. She reached to touch his cheek and it was so cold.

She didn't get a second more to inspect him because the two men started yelling, but she couldn't make out any words. They didn't make sense to her. Suddenly, a hand landed on her shoulder. She turned around to face its owner, and was met with the stony expression of another man in a blue uniform, though his was slightly different. He was mouthing more gibberish. She shook off his grasp violently. She didn't have time for his nonsense. She needed to help Humphrey! She didn't know how but she had to do something.

The third blue man must not have liked that very much. He wrapped his arms around her, pinning hers to her sides. He lifted her off the ground somewhat and started carrying her backward. The other blue men starting moving again, putting Humphrey into their vehicle. She kicked at the air ferociously but to no avail. She had to do something. Yet, anything she did yielded no benefit. The blue men shut the backdoors of their ambulance and got in the front seat. It started moving away.

Charlie screamed again. She had to get free. She had to help Humphrey! She couldn't though. Her restraints were solid.

As the flashing lights sped off out of sight, she started crying. Humphrey looked terrible. She had no idea what happened. The world started to slow back down to normal again. She could hear the voice of the man holding her.

"Miss, you need to calm down." he said softly, despite his forceful grip on her. Charlie looked back at him. He was a police officer. Behind them was his cruiser, its lights flashing just like the ambulance's. She could hear the loud, near whimpering barking of Bailey from inside the house. She broke down. The image of her brother, so impossibly still was burned into her eyes. Her body went limp. The police man gently lowered her to the ground. She sat on the dew covered grass, though she was uncaring of the cold and the dampness. The officer kneeled next to her.

"Miss, are you okay?" he asked gently. Charlie didn't look up at him. She stared at her one of her hands. The tips of its fingers had blood on them and it wasn't her own. She was speechless, her throat so hoarse from her wailing. She sniffled and forced out a nod.

"What happened?" the officer said. He placed a tender hand on her shoulder. She had to fight the feeling of shards of glass in her throat in order to speak.

"I-I don't…I don't know." She muttered. She started balling again. The officer took in a deep breath. She looked up at him weakly. He was Caucasian, with soft features and piercing blue eyes. He was young, probably in his early twenties and had his hat on.

"Who was that?" he asked, removing his hand and playing it on his knee.

"My brother, Humphrey."

"And what's your name?"

"Charlie…Wilson. My last name is Wilson."

The conversation was only broken by Charlie's sharp breathing and Bailey's whining barks. He told her that his name was Officer Daniels. She choked on her words a few times. He continued to ask her question after question procedurally. The whole time, he was collected, understandably much more so than she was. He asked her about her age, Humphrey's age, their family, and a multitude of other things. He wrote some stuff down in a small notebook.

Finally, he returned his notebook to his shirt pocket. He glanced up at her and smiled. "Is that your dog?" he asked, pointing his thumb toward the house. Charlie followed it and heard Bailey running her own throat ragged. Charlie nodded silently. His smile disappeared and was replaced with a tight line. "You should call your dad" he said curtly, "Do you need to borrow my phone?".

Charlie shook her head. She reached into her pocket and speed-dialed Paul. He answered after two rings.

"Hey Charlie" Paul answered in a lively tone. He must have been in a good mood. This was going to ruin that.

"Hey Dad" she replied grimly.

"You sound upset. Is something wrong?" he asked. He was always one to be in tune to her emotions. She loved that about him. She couldn't tell him this. She could barely say it to herself. "Honey?" Paul said. Charlie couldn't take it. She removed the phone from her ear and clutched it to her chest. She didn't fight back another round of balling.

"Would you like me to?" Officer Daniels asked politely. Charlie didn't look at him, but nodded. She stretched out the phone and he took it. "Hello sir. My name is Officer Daniels and I'm here with Charlie." He said into the phone. Charlie could only hear half of the conversation, which consisted of a lot of "yes, sir", "that's correct", and "mhm". She did pay much attention to it. She did catch him say "lacerations" though and that concerned her. It seemed as though that was the only thing Officer Daniels knew that she didn't. He must've arrived on scene after her. The conversation ended with him saying "I'll meet you there". He hung up and handed the phone back to Charlie.

"Come on" he said kindly, "Let's get you cleaned up and then I can drive you to the hospital". He extended a hand to her and helped stand up. He walked with her into the house. Once inside, he stepped to the side of the front door and said "I'll wait for you here". Charlie nodded again and started up towards the second floor bathroom. Once she crested the stairs and turned to look into the bathroom, her heart stopped. She gasped loudly and reached out behind her to brace herself against the hallway wall. Her hand contacted it with a thud.

"Charlie?" Officer Daniels called. When she didn't respond after a second, he bolted up the stairs. He saw her standing at the top of them staring at something. "Are you…" he started to ask, but as he reached the top of the stairs, he saw what she was looking at so intently. Through the partially opened door, he could see that the bathroom floor was covered in blood. It was fresh and wet. He cautiously stepped forward with his hand on his gun just in case. He opened the door the rest of the way and looked around. The bathroom sink was filled with an off-color red liquid and melting ice. The counter itself had a fair amount of blood on it too, but lying next to the droplets was a pocket knife, opened and bloody. He sighed gravely.

He turned around to the girl and asked "Do you have another bathroom?".

Charlie nodded again and headed back down the stairs to the other bathroom. A minute later, she returned from with clean hands, but was shaking slightly. She had seen the knife too. Did that mean Humphrey did this to himself? He couldn't have? It must have been an accident. He wouldn't have done it on purpose. Still, there was a small doubt in the back of her mind.

She walked past the living room and Bailey whimpered at her. Charlie had almost forgotten about her. The dog looked just as worried, possibly more so, than she did. Bailey must have been there the whole time. That had to have been terrifying for her. Charlie opened the crate door slightly, just enough to reach in and scratch the dog's neck. It was meant as a small comfort. After a minute where the dog seemed no less worried, Charlie sighed and closed the gate again. She felt awful that she had to leave her, but hospitals generally don't allow dogs. Tears rimmed her eyes another time.

Charlie regathered herself and started walking toward the door. Officer Daniels had resumed his post there and upon seeing her, nodded and led her out the door to his police cruiser. Charlie sat in the back while he drove. The ride was silent. Neither of the two had anything to say. Charlie simply did her best to avoid crying again.

She thought about who she should tell. No one really came to mind except one person, a girl specifically. Before she left a moment more for thought, she sent a text to Kate, saying "I don't know what happened, but I saw Humphrey get taken away in an ambulance. I don't know if he's okay.". She thought about whether or not she should have told her. Humphrey probably wouldn't want her to know. He was so hurt by what she said. Charlie tried not to think about what Kate told him to do. She didn't want that suspicion to play out in her mind. If it started, it wasn't going to stop. Charlie thought Kate deserved to know. She cared about Humphrey, even if she was doing a shitty job of showing it at the moment. She would want to be told. It was important. Charlie just hoped that Humphrey wouldn't be mad at her. If…when he wakes up.

 **A/N: I'm going to keep this as short as possible because I already told a lot of you, but this is pretty complex. Basically, from September 15** **th** **to the 22** **nd** **, I was hospitalized for my depression and anxiety. I was committed to the University of Behavioral Health-Care. In short, I could not contract for safety when asked, which means that I could not answer definitively whether or not I would hurt myself when. A lot happened while I was in there and a lot has changed about me. I'm better, but nor "cured" so there will be times when I just can't update or talk for a while. As such, I will not promise any update schedule. I was never really good at keeping them and between school and this stuff, I can't be regular with them. I will try to work on weekends, but that doesn't mean that I will post every week. I will try to make it at least more often than once a month.**

 **Thank you guys for staying with me through my own difficult times. It means a lot to me. I hope I can repay you with an excellent story. I'll do my best. I hope you liked this chapter. Best of luck. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**

 **p.s. This isn't that important, but I'm happy about it. Chapter 20 of TVoL alone received 27 reviews, which is more 4 more than I got throughout the entirety of Love Me for Mine. I thought that was worth celebrating that I reached this point with TVoL.**


	22. Lamentation and Linoleum

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 22 Lamentation and _Linoleum_

 **A/N: I bring you another spawn from my brain, after far too long. I'm sorry about that but this is actually the earliest I could have finished. I worked in spite of having an inexplicable and extraordinary amount of trouble with this chapter and a lot of trouble in my actual life. I continue to experience rather dark times, so dark in fact that I refuse to put anything like it in this story, despite it being based loosely on my life. Both you guys and I don't need that. Regardless, here is another emotion-filled chapter that I hope is up to the same standard, even though I'm a little out of practice and not doing too well. Still, it's good to be back.**

 **Favorite Review:**

 **I honestly can't pick one because they were all so amazing. Thank you, all of you.**

(Third Person POV)

'How is it possible that my life could get changed so completely in such a short amount of time?' Charlie thought to herself. One week, she was enjoying Christmas with her family and the next she was sitting in a crowded hospital hallway with her brother in the emergency room just a few yards away. Through the small windows on the double doors and with some difficulty, the room was visible, but she refused to look into the room. She was sure that there was nothing she wanted to see inside. The image of a Humphrey so pale that he almost looked like a skeleton was seared into her eyes from earlier. She couldn't think about anything else as she stared silently at the clean, linoleum floor.

The hospital was certainly busy. There were nurses and doctors running frantically from room to room. Gurney wheels squeaked and patients' beds groaned. Telephones rang persistently. A few TV's filled any available silence with boring broadcasts of cartoons and old re-runs of sitcoms. There was a baby or two crying.

Charlie honestly felt like crying. Her eyes stung and her breathing was harried, but no tears came. It didn't seem right for them to. She was just frozen in place. Though the floor of the hospital was filled with din so great that it was near impossible to hold a conversation, the sounds of the world fell mute on her ears. She was just stuck on how to process what was going on.

She had just sent a text to Kate. She wasn't sure about it at first. After all, the girl had just crushed Humphrey's heart, which she knew even if he hadn't told her so. Charlie made the decision though. Humphrey may not have always been in the best mood, but he was never one to hold a grudge against another, especially this one girl. He'd always had a special place for her in the large expanse that was his heart. She knew that he would still care for his friend long after she hurt him and he would think that she deserved to know what was going on too, wouldn't he?

No reply came and Charlie wasn't sure what that meant. Could Kate have not gotten it? Could her phone have been off? Would she…she wouldn't have ignored it, would she? No, that didn't sound like Kate. Charlie decided not to make any assumptions. She didn't have the energy for that.

All of her current energy was being spent on worrying about her brother. She didn't know if he was going to be okay. He certainly didn't look like it when she saw him. There was so, so much blood…

Charlie was too preoccupied in her own thoughts to notice the man in green scrubs kneeling in front of her at first. It almost seemed like she blinked and suddenly he was there. She tracked her eyes up to meet his face. He was tan and had short hair. His expression was soft but solemn.

"Miss Wilson?" he asked quietly. It was hard to hear him over the background noise of the hospital.

Charlie nodded quickly in response. She was expecting him to say something horrible, something earth-shattering. He glanced over his left shoulder toward the emergency room and then looked back at her.

"That's your brother in there, right?" he continued. He had green, miserable-looking eyes. Was he given the job of telling her of her loss? Could that be why he's so sad? She nodded again. He sighed audibly. What did that mean? He probed bluntly, "Do you know if he has a history of psychological disorders?".

She thought about his strange question for a moment. "Why?" Charlie quietly asked. She wasn't trying to be rude or make his job difficult. She just wanted to know why he asked and why he needed to know. He sighed once more.

"Your brother is being stabilized, but his injuries are consistent with an attempted suicide" the man conceded gently. His tone made no impact on the gravity of the subject, though. Her worst nightmare had become a reality. She'd always known it was a possibility; but to see it being so present, so real, it was horrifying. Charlie's face fell into her hands and tears broke free of the meager hold she had on them. Devastated seemed like an appropriate word. Her world just fell apart.

Between sobs, she managed to bring her head up and say "Yes…h-he's been depressed for a few years". The man nodded grimly.

"Has he ever done something like this before?" he asked. Charlie's motivation for speaking suddenly died. She responded with a nod and crossed her arms over her chest tightly. She shut her eyes as she listened to the next question, "Do you need me to call someone?". She continued to shake her head until he eventually stood up and walked away.

That left her alone with her thoughts again. She squeezed herself harder. The sensation brought back vivid memories. She could recall Humphrey coming down from his room most mornings and how the first thing he would do was hug her. Charlie sobbed a little more. She didn't want to imagine that she could have never felt that again.

She couldn't help but feel guilty. If she hadn't told Kate about his problems, he wouldn't have been so upset. She knew very well that he didn't want her to know. Why couldn't she have just kept her stupid mouth shut? Maybe this was all her fault.

Just as more tears threatened to come forward, the clapping of shoes running on the floor sounded. The clatter grew louder and louder. Charlie looked up from her hands with red, puffy eyes and the slightest bit of mascara trailed down her cheeks. She saw, sprinting from the other end of the hallway, Kate and Lily. The older of the two was moving more fervently.

"Where is he?" Kate shouted as she approached. Her heart was pounding like a hammer on an anvil in her chest and her breathing was strained. Scanning around for any sign of Humphrey, she came out of her gait as she came up on Charlie, who had just stood up from a plastic chair against the wall. Her knees wobbled and her arms shook. She couldn't look up to face either of the girls, nor could she bring herself to speak. Only quiet sobs answered Kate's question.

Kate noticed the small sound, though it was faintly heard in the commotion of the hospital. Still, she recognized its importance. "Charlie, calm down. Are you okay?" she said softly. Charlie didn't say anything, but she knew the answer. No, she was absolutely fucking not okay. She was standing in the hospital, crying, because her brother tried to kill himself, and she was talking to the girl who broke his heart an hour before. She wasn't angry at her though. She couldn't be. This was just as much her fault. These thoughts spawned more sobs in her throat. They let themselves out, accompanied by another wave of tears.

Kate watched Charlie's face as it phased through a range of emotions, before settling on weeping. She wasn't sure what to think at the moment. There was just so much to be thought of. The one thing that did clearly come to mind, though, was that above all else, Charlie looked like her world shattered around her feet. Kate embraced the girl in the most comforting way she could. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders and pulled her to her chest. Charlie's tears fell into her shirt. Her crying went straight into Kate's ear and she figured that her questions could wait.

She felt beyond bad for the girl. They weren't always on good terms, but Charlie and Humphrey had always had so much love for each other. Kate saw the glint in her eyes every time her brother gave her a hug or made a playfully sarcastic jab at her. They were just so comfortable and at home with each other. Humphrey was the only blood relative the girl had. On top of the general sympathy, Kate couldn't suppress the guilt that bubbled up in her subconscious, because the last time she saw Humphrey, she had said and done…so much.

She hadn't meant any of it. She just got so angry and hurt all at once that she just exploded. She was basically upset over nothing. Humphrey had a right to privacy. Not to mention that she wouldn't have told herself anything either, had she been in his position. He was right. She ditched him for the first guy who asked her out. Well, not the first guy, the first guy who didn't come off as a conceited prick.

She didn't know what she saw in Hutch to begin with, but whatever it may have been, it was dead and gone now. Sure, he looked alright, but he wasn't nearly what she wanted. Humphrey was what she wanted. He was, is, and might always be all she ever wanted. That's why she went out with Hutch and put up with his bullshit for so long. She was looking for the same thing in someone else, or at least trying to move on. Kate felt something for Humphrey, something monumental and immovable, a mountain of a feeling. She couldn't even describe how much he meant to her; but she through that away, because she wanted something more. She got greedy and when he didn't respond to her desires, she tried looking somewhere.

Kate had tried to be subtle about it. She left hints here and there in just about every conversation, but he never reacted to any of them. It even seemed like he mirrored them, but she knew it didn't mean the same thing. She had liked him for the longest time, longer than she even recognized. She'd never tell anyone, but there may or may not be a few assorted notebooks with the name "Mrs. Kate Wilson" written in hearts inside. She'd also never admit that she still had some of them under her bed.

But now, here she was, in a hospital with his sister, who was currently drenching her shirt in tears. Kate rubbed the girls back reassuringly. Charlie wasn't much for crying, so whatever happened must've been pretty serious. Kate's curiosity ached in her mind.

Between sharp sobs and broken breathing, Kate softly asked "Charlie…what happened?". She held the girl at arms' length by the shoulder to look her in the eyes. They were so red and agitated, so incredibly distraught. Kate nearly held her breath as she waited for the answer.

Charlie sputtered, "I-I-I…I-I don't…". Her less than coherent thought was broken with sounds, almost as if she were suffocating on her own sniffles and gasps.

Kate looked at her calmly and said "Charlie, you have to calm down. Slow, deep breaths…". Charlie nodded frantically. Kate gave her a moment to relax as she watched her breaths ease. Once they came at a steady pace through her pursed lips, still interrupted by the occasional sniffle, Kate resumed her inquiries. "Now…where's Humphrey?" she asked softly, trying not to trigger another episode of hysteria.

Charlie's eyes visibly darkened, losing their typically illustrious blue. It was one of the things Kate admired about her, because of its resemblance to the cobalt ones of her brother, although, they too seemed much darker and greyer as of late as well. Charlie wordlessly turned her head toward her right, her gaze fixated at the emergency room doors. Kate looked on with her, Lily doing the same as well, the latter gasping and covering her mouth at the realization.

The girls all turned back to face each other once again. Charlie refused to meet anyone's eyes. She was just staring at something, it could have been Kate's belt buckle or something else, but neither of the other two girls knew. She just became so distant.

"Is…is he okay?" the fair-haired younger sister asked. Charlie didn't move. She just screwed her eyes shut tightly, the muscles in her face clearly straining to do so. Her body suddenly got very tense and her hands balled into fists.

"H-He was so pale…a-and all the blood…a-and…" She answered. She stopped herself and took another large breath. She fought back the bitter images that persisted inside her head, each painfully carved into her memory. She shuddered as she tried to rid these thoughts from her mind, giving her eyes one last squeeze before she opened them. They were still welling up with tears, however. She continued "They…They only told me he's being stabilized. I-I don't know anything else.".

The two sisters shared looks of concern, for both the boy being sewn up and the girl whose emotional scars were already apparent. She looked like a part of her had just died, or at least, seemed like it was going to. She was drawn and tired. Charlie retook her seat and once again clutched her stomach. Every time she pictured that afternoon, she got a little more nauseous. She leaned forward, her bangs coming untucked from behind her ear. She looked up once again at Kate. The blonde sat in a chair beside her and placed her hand on her friend's shoulder in an effort to comfort her.

As Charlie's eyes tracked her, she made another realization, a small connection between earlier events. Kate had said…something…to Humphrey. He hadn't been quite the same after. As Charlie recalled her exact words, she froze. She had to tell Kate, but she couldn't think of what to say. She held herself a little tighter and the girl took notice.

"What is it?" Kate asked. Charlie considered her, regretful and pained that she had to be the one to say this, but regardless, compelled to do so. Her blue eyes were soft and despondent.

"There…there's one more thing" Charlie began. She braced herself in anticipation. She could have searched for her entire life, but there would still be no good way to break this to her. "They…they think Humphrey did this to himself, th-that he tried to…to…" She stuttered, unable to bring herself to utter the last few words. It was her deepest darkest fear ever since she found out; something she kept locked away, but always remained at the back of her mind. Any time he just 'went for a drive' or stayed home 'sick', she wondered if that would be the day she would find him or get some terrible phone call. Despite having played out the scenario in her mind over and over again for years, she couldn't have been prepared for the actuality of it.

Kate listened on as the brunette's sentence went unfinished and turned into sharp inhales, muffled by her hands. Kate's own hand slowly fell off Charlie's shoulder. This…this couldn't have been real. It couldn't have actually happened. She tried desperately to convince herself that this nightmare was just that, but she couldn't fool herself. Humphrey, the oldest and dearest friend she ever had, the best one she ever had, had just given up. He tried to end his life.

Then, a feeling like if the weight of the world had sudden crashed upon her. Only a few hours prior, she…she had told him to do exactly that. She remembered saying it to him. There was no way she could ever forget it. And he had listened. He actually did it. God she hadn't even meant it; didn't even realize what she was saying, but she broke him. She drove him to his limit and he gave up. This was her fault.

She couldn't have even imagined the pain he must have been in to have done this to himself, pain she caused. How could she have been so careless? She didn't think he even cared about what she thought of her anymore, but of course he did. He still thought about her, enough to actually get her possibly the best gift she'd ever received, and she hadn't even given him the time of day. She should have noticed. He cared about her, he always had, because that's just who he was. He held out hope that one day she turn back around and come to her senses, but all she did was spit it back in his face.

To think that she had almost deprived the world of this person, the one who thought more of her than anyone else, was crushing. If she didn't deserve him as a friend before, she certainly didn't now.

Worse still, she had the audacity to be sitting there trying to comfort his sister. She had caused them both so much suffering, and Charlie had to have been reliving it all over again every time Kate touched her. Kate…Kate was a monster. She caused this.

She stared at her hands intently, even as they trembled in her lap. A few hours ago, she used them to attack him. She insulted him, berated him, and she made him do this, all of this. She might as well have handed him a loaded gun.

As her guilt over the matter rose at an accelerating rate, a doctor walked over to the trio of girls. He bore a sullen face and green scrubs, the same man who had spoken to Charlie before. They all looked at him expectantly, pleading for good news.

As he approached, he said "Are you all here for Humphrey Wilson?". Kate couldn't move a muscle to even nod.

Instead Lily answered "Yes" on behalf of the three.

His attention turned specifically to Charlie as he continued, "Your brother's vitals are stable…".

Before he could say anything more, Charlie's head shot up at the sound of his condition. She interrupted, promptly asking, "Can I see him?".

The doctor's face overtly fell and the three girls held their breaths. "Yes…you can, but he lost a lot of blood. He's receiving a transfusion now, but he'll be asleep for quite some time. Additionally, the paramedics believe that he used a pocket knife. There is a very serious concern for infection." he announced, clearly burdened by having to be the bearer of bad news. The man, judging by his build, appeared to be in his mid-twenties, but streaks of grey had already begun to show in his thinning hair. His job was aging him. He watched them sympathetically, once again reflecting on the definitively worst part of his job.

Kate couldn't take it a moment longer. She couldn't hear another word of the anguish and grief she had stricken on her best friend and his sister. She stood abruptly, starting away from the group at a brisk pace.

Lil reacted to her sudden response and said "Kate? Where are you…", only to have the girl pick up speed into a near run.

She continued down the hallway, retracing the path she had taken. Coming out of her gait, she closed in on the elevators. She wasn't sure where she was going, but she knew she had to get there that instant. She needed time and space, or maybe just some distance from her guilt, though it followed her every footstep. As she came to a halt in front of the control panel on the wall, alongside three of the six total elevators, she rapidly pressed the 'down' button, futilely hoping that it would expedite the process.

A moment after she pressed the button she heard the electronic ringing of one having arrived on her floor. She spun around quickly and made her way to the opening doors, at which time a tall, familiar man stepped out. It was Paul, Humphrey and Charlie's adopted father. He frantically stepped out, vacating the space and passing the girl who was walking inside, hoping for all her worth that he wouldn't notice her. There wasn't enough room in the door, however, so she roughly bumped his arm with her shoulder, gaining his attention. He looked behind just as the doors began to close again and saw her. His face was anxious, but surprised as he took in her distraught demeanor. She was shaking and her eyes reflected such a look of sadness. Her breathing had turned ragged and her heart threatened to rip itself from her chest. They went wide as they met his and turned almost apologetic.

"Kate?" he called out, worried for her sake based on her concerning manner. Just before the doors finally closed, he was sure he saw her somberly mouth "I'm sorry".

The girl inside fell against the wall of the empty elevator as it descended and slowly slid along it to the floor. There she sat and she wept, thankful at least that no one could see or hear her, though it was nowhere near consolation enough. The guilt she felt for what she'd done…she might as well have killed him herself…it was insurmountable. As the machinery hummed in its motion, she offered everything she had, her entire life and self, just for Humphrey to be okay, that Charlie and Paul wouldn't have to lose him. She didn't feel right asking to see him again, despite desperately wishing that. She didn't deserve that privilege, didn't deserve him.

What had she done?

 **A/N: Please tell me how this chapter was. I'm not too sure about it. Either way, I hope you enjoyed. You guys and your continued support are extremely encouraging for me, even in tough times. It always amazes (and saddens me to a degree) when I see the view counter for this story go up every single day, even when I hadn't posted for a month. You guys are amazing.**

 **-Nick (ncham9 or occasionally known as Madre)**


	23. Rendered Restless

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 23 _Rendered Restless_

 **A/N: I am aware that this is much less than the usual length of one of my chapters.**

A slow, rhythmic beep sounded next to Humphrey's bed, though he couldn't hear it. The only other noise inside the small room was his equally lethargic breathing. It'd been three days since he was admitted to the hospital and he still hadn't woken up. Between fighting to heal the wounds and battling against worryingly high fevers, his body was left too exhausted for consciousness.

At the moment, Lily and Paul accompanied him, sitting in absolute silence. They simply watched his chest rise and fall, the only motion of his otherwise still body. This had become the ritual of the past few days. Lily would come home from school to visit for most of the day and Paul had stayed with Humphrey throughout the day and night.

They weren't the only ones to be there for him, though. Neither Kate nor Charlie had been to school at all recently. While his sister stayed just as Paul did, Kate spent an equal amount of time at the hospital and her own home. She wasn't really feigning sickness when her mother called her out of school every morning; she looked almost worse than Humphrey did. On top of that, she spent all of her time at home by herself, usually just sitting in her room quietly. She hardly even spoke, aside from faint, indistinguishable mutterings to herself late at night that Lily sometimes heard.

Even while they were at the hospital, Charlie and Kate weren't in Humphrey's room, however. They never even went inside. The two simply sat in the hallway, just outside the door. Neither of the two wanted to see him like this. Along with the general displeasure with such a thing, Lily knew that both bore an incredible amount of guilt for it and that they couldn't stand to see what they considered the result of their own actions.

Lily didn't think it at all Charlie's fault, but she didn't know if she could say the same for Kate. What if she really had pushed him over the edge? Lily saw the look of utter heartbreak in his eyes the last time he talked to her. He'd even admitted to the white-haired girl how much her sister meant to him. He talked about her as if she wasn't of the same planet, like she was perfect and something to be both treasured and coveted. He was such a sweet boy and one of the most caring people she'd ever known, but Kate broke him. Regardless of whether or not this was Kate's fault, Lily wasn't sure that she'd come to forgive her for that.

Paul stood up suddenly, breaking Lily's concentration.

"I'm going to get some coffee. Do you want anything?" the man asked. His voice had lost its usual, energetic quality and was replaced with a baritone that exemplified solemnity. It was empty, bereft of emotion or feeling. Lily shook her head in response. He simply nodded, opened the door, and left.

With him good, the room felt eerily cold and empty. Neither of its occupants moved an inch. Lily watched her friend in such a pitiful state, only managing to keep her cheeks dry because there were no more tears to give. In the past few days, her life had been so grey, so dull. Everyone's had been. It was like an immense weight dropped onto Humphrey's friends and families. Such was the feeling of seeing one of the single most important people in your life decide that their own wasn't worth living any longer.

It wasn't her place to think it, but Lily couldn't help but be hurt that Humphrey didn't consider the pain he'd put them through. She knew she couldn't be angry. This was simply another thing to add to the pile of hurt that accumulated in their hearts.

Another item in the mass of pain involved was the knowledge of how few people were aware of what had happened. The two sisters and Charlie were the only ones in the school to have any idea. Lily had been quiet and reclusive during all of her classes, leaving no room for inquiry by the small amount of peers she had. The other two hadn't even been in for days. Paul knew, obviously. Besides them, the only people to have any clue as to what was happening were the hospital staff and Mrs. Eve Williams, Kate and Lily's mother. Aside from the few odd words to her sister and Charlie, that woman was the only person Kate had spoken to since Humphrey's hospitalization.

Eve was one of the few whom the girls fully put their trust in. Their father had been on that list too, but…that was a long time ago. The woman had been their sanctuary, their deepest comfort. Instinctively, she knew when either of her daughters was upset, even through the layers of disguise they used to hide the fact. When Kate refused to go to school, hardly ate, and spent all of her time at home in seclusion, the mother had locked both Kate and herself in the girl's room until she spilled her thoughts. Eve was also the one to drive both her and Lily to the hospital every day.

But, her included, only a handful of people knew, and Lily despised that fact. She thought that at least someone outside of the five of them should be upset. All of Jasper should have been heartbroken. They had almost lost a boy so dear, so caring, and so incredibly special for forever. There ought to be announcements, ceremonies, some form of acknowledgement for fuck's sake. Even a shitty, little condolence card would be something. But no, instead it was almost a secret. And lily supposed she had to keep it that way. It was not her right to divulge such things. She couldn't imagine Humphrey would want that. Also, it truthfully wasn't even her business, though she would peel the skin off of anyone who suggested that idea. But she wasn't his family (at least formally), and more importantly she wasn't _him_.

She really needed him to wake up though.

Humphrey had been in the hospital for what was now pushing five days. His visitors' faces grew more drawn with each passing hour of his unconsciousness. They were all impossibly drained, Paul the most visibly. Bags were weighing down his eyes and his motions had slowed to the likes of a Matrix movie. He spent most of the day sitting in his chair, staring at his son with a hand on the unkempt scruff beneath his chin.

At this particular moment, Paul slept in the same chair, too exhausted both physically and emotionally. It was actually kinda funny, Lily thought, because even though they weren't related by blood, there was a clear resemblance between them as they both snored lightly as they slept. While dozing off, they even looked like each other a little bit. The though brought a small smile to the white-haired girl's face for a moment in spite of her state, but it quickly passed once she realized the peacefulness of their slumber wasn't quite so simple.

Humphrey was still as he had been for the past majority of a week, largely unchanging. His fever had plateaued but was still higher than healthy. On top of that, he still hadn't woken up yet. Lily couldn't entirely convince herself that he would ever have the will to.

A rustling startled her from her pensive reverie, where she had apparently been staring at the floor for a few moments. Her heart skipped a beat as her face shot up to look up at the boy lying in the hospital bed. It returned to its normal staccato when she realized that he was exactly as still as he had been before. Her eyes tracked to the door of the room, where a nurse in pink scrubs peeked her head in.

"Sorry, I didn't meant to disturb" the woman apologized coyly, before opening the door to fully allow herself in.

"No…i-it's…it's fine" Lily answered, still remarkably disappointed that she hadn't gotten to see her friend more recovered. She returned her gaze to the boy.

"Well…I just need to change his bandages" the nurse offered, taking note of the girl's demeanor. Lily simply nodded in acknowledgement.

The nurse shuffled over to the bed quietly, presumably so as to not wake the napping man in the room. With a perceivable, almost motherly gentleness, she lifted Humphrey's right arm in her hand. Carefully, she peeled away the large, adhesive pad that covered his wounds.

While the lesion was exposed, Lily managed to catch a glimpse. The tattered flesh around them was a bright, inflamed red surrounded by purple bruising that covered most of his wrist. The canyon torn into the flesh itself was of a much deeper hue. The wound was closed with thin, black wire that held the skin together, but seemed to cause further aggravation. Along the seam that now existed on his skin, there were also traces of yellow, the pussy sign of his infection. The whole room seemed filled with sickness.

Lily averted her eyes from seeing more as the nurse cleaned the incisions with some alcoholic solution and redressed the wound. Lily refused to watch the repetition of the events on the other wrist.

The nurse herself sighed, no one in the hospital being able to say that they weren't affected by the boy's ailments. He was far too young to have such problems and it pained her, because she was rearing a son of similar age herself. She refused to let her brain imagine the two being in the same place. The entire ordeal was heartbreaking. If she ever had to see such things again, she would gladly quit her job and find something else to do. Once is enough.

 **A/N: Sorry this chapter is a little short but it's more filling time than anything. I promise the next will be more eventful.**

 **I know that at least some of you have noticed, but I started a new** _ **How to Train Your Dragon**_ **story called** _ **Fleeting Touches.**_ **If that seems like something that would interest you, I'd appreciate you looking. But in regards to this story, it does not mean anything for** _ **The Value of a Life**_ **. I was going to wait until I finished TVoL to start writing it, but the idea was floating around in my head for so long that I just had to get it out. I find myself craving writing for TVoL and Fleeting Touches separately and at different times, so I don't believe it will affect my update schedule. I will be updating them in tandem but not necessarily equally. Sometime it will be two of one and one of the other. It just depends. Either way, I'm not leaving the Alpha and Omega fandom, I just thought the idea for the story would fit better there.**

 **Anyways, if I don't post again in the next week, happy holidays everyone, whatever you celebrate. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


	24. Nagging Nightmares Finale

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 24 _Nagging Nightmares_

 **A/N: Hey do you guys want a Kate chapter right about now? Because you're getting one :P**

 **This is another pretty heavy one. You have been warned. It also includes the lyrics of** _ **Impossible**_ **by Shontelle, which I claim no ownership of. (This was also featured in an extra important chapter before** _ **hint hint**_ **).**

Kate found little respite in what used to be the blessing that was sleep, but now haunted her with vivid fantasies of terror. Her unconscious mind never ceased to drift back to the same topic, Humphrey. She never escaped thoughts of him, night or day.

This particular evening had seen one of the worst yet. Kate sat atop her bed, her knees tucked into her chest and her cheeks wet with the remnants of tears. She found herself like this often, crying silently and inside her own little world, one full of darkness and despair.

She could still picture her last dream in her head and did so regardless of whether or not she wanted to. It was as if she was meant to relive it over and over again. Worst of all, she deserved the pain of it, not even nearing that which she herself had caused.

It had begun with a dark, starry night, Humphrey and herself sitting on cool grass and staring into the beautiful vista that was the sky. She couldn't place exactly where they were, all she knew was that it was very open and secluded, no artificial lights to spoil the splendor of the heavens above. She also noticed that they were raised above a field on a hill, giving them a beautiful vantage over the landscape. The air around her was chilled, but she wasn't cold. No, the wintery ambiance was staved off by the balmy body that enveloped her. Humphrey sat behind her, his legs on either side of her own thighs and his arms wrapped around her midsection. She rested her hands on top of his, noticing how small her own were in comparison, and she leaned her back into his warmth. And she was happy, happier than she could remember being in months.

He placed his chin on her shoulder, holding her securely. She felt far too comfortable to move, as if she wanted to be immortalized in that very position for all of eternity. Despite the overwhelming compulsion to stay impeccably still as to not ruin perfect position, she forced herself to twist so that she could see his face. He smiled sweetly, his eyes even more illustrious than the majesty the entire galaxy that stretched out before them. They were so much more tangible and for the moment, they were all hers.

Effortlessly Kate's head tilted up and her mouth contacted his in such a symphony of sensations and feelings, like the Earth had suddenly found a new orbit around the sun and everything she ever knew was different now. It was exactly as she remembered feeling when she kissed him that Christmas. Her eyes widened, her heart swelled, and some strange, magical chorus of signals rushed from every cell on her body to her brain and back again, carrying information about the brand new world around her. It was exhilarating.

After a moment of savoring each other's presence, the two separated and looked into the eyes of the other, brilliant gold that rivalled the sun's corona staring into the deep blue of the most tranquil and pristine waters of frozen tundras.

"I…" they both started simultaneously, never breaking the gaze between them. They both smiled.

"You first" Kate declared boldly. She was far more interested in whatever Humphrey felt could be added to the already unbelievable moment to make it better. He nodded.

"Kate…I…I love…" he began, but before he could get his next word out, she interrupted him with a loud gasp. It wasn't at his words though. As Kate was watching his every move, waiting for whatever he was going to say, she noticed behind his head a brilliant streak of orange among the stars.

"Humphrey, look…" she said as she stared past him. He didn't seem at all perturbed by being cut off, but rather obeyed obligingly. He turned around and before the two of them was a dazzling show of splashes of color in the sky, ranging from bright blues and yellows to deep reds and greens. It was breath taking to say the least.

"Wow…" they both gulped. Neither had seen anything so much as a shooting star in their life before, and both found themselves to be enthralled by the show the heavens put on just for them. It went on for what seemed like hours, the wondrous moment frozen in time.

With the spectacular still shining in front of them, Humphrey turned back to Kate and she found herself once again enchanted in his irises.

"Did you make a wish?" he asked softly, staring at her like she had never been looked at before, like she was something unique and out of innumerable possibilities, had been made perfectly to his liking in every way.

Truthfully, she had completely forgotten. She wasted what could be her only opportunity to ask for anything, where nothing was impossible. Her face fell, clearly disappointed.

"No, I didn't even realize" she admitted sadly. "Did you?" she asked nonetheless. At least she could hope for one of them to get their greatest desire. He nodded and smiled brightly.

"Yes" he said cheerily. She couldn't stop herself from wondering what his wish was, even though her superstitious side told her that it would negate the effect. He seemed to have been reading her mind and had no such qualms. He whispered gently, "I wished for _you_ ; that you would be mine forever and I, yours, to adore and serve you in life and in death".

Kate didn't know how to respond. She was stunned in a sense of such elation at his admission. He touched the soft skin of his forehead to hers. They shared the same air for a moment, feeling the warmth escape the others lungs and be trapped between them.

He then spoke again, even softer than before, "And I will always be here, to give you all that I can until the end of my days". Her breath came out harried for an instant as it stalled in her heart. Suddenly she knew what to do, they only thing she had ever wanted to do. Her hand came up to his neck, her thumb resting on his jaw and her fingers stretching behind his ear as she pulled him closer and kissed him again. And once again, the moment froze.

But time jerked back into motion abruptly. Everything seemed to happen at ten times the normal speed. For a second she wasn't sure, but a multitude of things suddenly became clear to her. The ground…it was shaking violently. Trees in the distance toppled over and collapsed to the ground. They sky, no longer filled with peaceful and exciting colors, was now stained a dark red.

The two stood up and looked around for an answer as to what was going on, but nothing came.

Then the earth beneath them began to split, hot gases escaping from hell itself and filling the atmosphere with the putrid scent of sulfur. Kate and Humphrey held fast to each other and backed away from the now expanding fissure, but smaller crevices snaked out from the larger one in all directions as land fell away to be swallowed into the abyss.

The two teens spun around to make a mad dash away. Kate, as she always had been, was faster than the boy and led him by a few yards. Kate turned around to see him just as the ground he stood on began to sink.

"Humphrey!" she screamed deafeningly.

She rushed back to what had become a ledge, just as his head had fallen out of sight. She flattened herself to the ground as quickly as she could, peering into the darkness. But his hand was still clinging to the overhang, the rest of him dangling by its support. She stretched to reach her arm down and grabbed his free wrist. He stared down to the perilous fate below him and then back up to her.

The rocky surface his hand had gripped broke away and fell below.

He blinked slowly her. She looked into his once magnificent eyes that were now filled with terror and hurt. They were defeated as he looked up to her, resigned from all life. The now unoccupied hand came up around her fingers. He stared into her eyes, weak and tired.

"Please…no…" she begged him pitifully. He had no reaction to her words, however. He simply began prying at her fingers on his wrist. "Humphrey…" she entreated once more. He paid no heed and wrenched the last of her hold off of him. And then…he just slipped away. She cried his name again and again into the fissure hopelessly for hours. She ran her throat ragged and dry, hoping for some kind of response. But he had been taken away from her.

"I'm so sorry…" she sobbed.

And then she woke up. That was not the end of her misery, though. She couldn't get all of the agonizing images from her memory. Her imagination was cruel, lending its talents to her torture.

She cried throughout the night and into a small portion of the morning, but the sun was no consolation. Its brightness now seemed emptier, almost purposeless.

As she had been for many days now, Kate was sitting silently in what had become 'her chair' in the hospital. She wasn't possessive of it, it was just a fact that she was always occupying it and no one argued with that. The same went for Charlie, but she spent far less of her time _just_ sitting in hers. Even in the circumstances, she was of a kind that couldn't be that still for hours on end. She had do get up and walk around if nothing else, though she did so solemnly and usually without a word.

Humphrey had officially passed a week of hospitalization today. His father, Paul, had been required to go in to work for the first time since as well. That left only the three girls to keep him company, even if only in spirit.

Lily had gone to the cafeteria to get some coffee, Charlie opting to tag along to stretch her legs. They were all exhausted and certainly could have used the caffeine, but none more so than Kate. She had barely slept, kept up all night by her dream for fear of it returning if she fell back into slumber. It was still a phantom in her mind, every now and then bringing her to stare off into the distance as she replayed it.

She felt alone, more so than usual. Indeed, she hardly spoke to anyone around her when they were there, but she couldn't deny that at least the presence of another person was at least a little bit comforting. It provided her much needed distraction.

No one was there at the moment, for her or for Humphrey, the only of the two deserving to be anything else being the latter. Instead, _she_ was allowed the freedom of being awake and mobile and healthy, while someone as innocent, loving, and caring as he was bedridden. Every moment of it scraped against her heart, or she should say, that which remained from being split in two.

She couldn't get the face he had given her in the dream the night before. It was one she'd seen before, the same look Humphrey had shown the last time she had spoken to him, the soul-crushing look of utter heartbreak. She also couldn't stop thinking of the meaning of her nightmare. It seemed as clear as day. She was given the perfect opportunity to be with someone she found so amazing and actually made her happy, but it quickly turned disastrous. She had let him go, been the last straw of his breaking. If she hadn't run so fast or left him behind…but she did. The worst part was that she was forced to imagine him slipping away, never for her to see him again. The mere thought tore at her chest.

Without even being aware of it, she had left her seat and had her hand on the door knob to Humphrey's room. She stopped for a moment to think, 'Did she really want to see him like this? Was it something she could even handle?'. No doubt, she would not enjoy the sight of him, but she couldn't stand another moment of being without him.

Carefully, as if she was worried she'd break it, she opened the door, crept inside, and closed it behind her.

Kate wasn't really sure what she was expecting, so she didn't know if she got it or not. Regardless she was still shocked. Humphrey still hadn't woken up, but she hadn't seen him anything like this before. From what she understood, he had regained some of his color, having been something close to white only a few days ago, but he still didn't look healthy. But since his infection had subsided, she was at least spared having to see him look so deathly.

He had visibly lost some weight and there was not a lot he could have afforded to be rid of to begin with. He looked emaciated, blood vessels highlighted under a near blank canvas. He seemed slightly bonier than she remembered, ridges appearing more defined than they used to be.

She looked to the ground to avoid taking in his despondent form, but she couldn't block out the sound of his shallow breathing that filled the room, nor the heartrate monitor beeping steadily. She tiptoed closer to the bed, taking what was probably Lily's last seat based on the slight indentation in the cushion and its proximity to the boy.

She found herself to be averting her eyes from his face. The slight scruff and chapped lips which seemed so unlike him were further reminder of what she had caused him. She also tried not to dwell on the cloth and medical tape that covered his wrists. That was too visceral for her.

Since she had first hazarded a gaze there, though, she couldn't take her eyes off of his hands. She remembered them being tender and reassuring to her, always there when she needed them most. Now the fingers had turned thin and stick-like.

It was wrong, what she did next. It felt disrespectful and undeserved. Like she had taken an honor, which lost much of its value to her imprudence, but she was undaunted. It was a privilege she used to have, but had long since squandered. Her hand snaked up onto the rough linens of the bed and to his arm. His skin was still smooth and warm, just as she had remembered. Slowly, her fingers glided along the limb, down past where the hidden wound was, which she specifically circumvented. She traced further along until the tips of her fingers met the skin of his palm. They were dry and much bigger than hers. If she concentrated, she could feel his pulse beneath the flesh.

The rest of her hand slid into his and closed around it. It was strange, holding the seemingly lifeless appendage. His digits extended outside of the grasp, stuck out and splayed as if she had simply done the same to a glove. Confusingly, the gesture made her feel better and worse at the same time. She was contented to be close to him once more, but she would have given anything to prevent the circumstances around it. But there was no point in berating herself about not being able to turn back time. It was impossible and she needed to accept that.

The past stayed in her thoughts, however; one event in particular, just before she had…confronted Humphrey. She remembered it, he was singing. In fact, she couldn't ever forget it, every pained word and brutal analogy. She recalled the emotion he projected throughout and how gut-wrenching to hear it was. But at the same time, she remembered the brilliance of the sound, how it went right through her. He sang from his heart and she felt it in hers.

As she ran through the memory again, she couldn't help but find the words in her own voice.

 _I remember years ago, someone told me I should take caution when it comes to love. I did._

 _But you were strong and I was not. My illusion, my mistake. I was careless, I forgot. I did._

She could still hear the beautiful tenor of his voice ringing out in an empty hall from an even emptier boy. To Kate's ears, her voice paled in comparison to his and did it no justice, but she continued nonetheless.

 _And now, when all is done, there is nothing to say. You have gone and so effortlessly._

 _You have won. You can go ahead. Tell them._

 **A chill went up her spine and her skin was stippled with goosebumps. She felt cold and alone. The worst part is that a lot of it was her fault.***

 _Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops. Write it on the skyline. All we had is gone now._

 _Tell them I was happy and my heart is broken. All my scars are open. Tell them what I hoped would be_

 _impossible, impossible, impossible, impossible._

Her voice cracked on the last few notes as air caught in her throat. Tears fell down her face and she broke into a sob.

After a moment to recollect herself, she wiped the water from her eyes. She pulled on the hand in Humphrey's, only to find it restrained. She readied to pull harder as to free herself, but stopped with wide eyes. She looked up to the intertwined mass of fingers to see that his had curled around her hand. Kate gasped. He had moved! Her eyes shot up to his face to see his eyes fidgeting as they tried to open. The beeping in the room sped up its tempo. He was waking up! After a week he was waking up!

She had at first failed to realize that while he was indeed coming to consciousness, she was still there with him and the last words she had said to him had been seared into her mind since the moment they were sounded.

Kate panicked. No, this was not how this was supposed to go. There was a reason she had stayed outside the room every day prior. She didn't belong there, she shouldn't have been allowed there. She snatched her hand back as her heart pounded and her breathing race. She could not be the first one he saw when he woke. She didn't deserve to see him ever again. Someone else, she needed someone else.

"Nurse!" she yelled shrilly and seconds later, one of the hospital staff, clad in blue scrubs, burst through the door, clearly alarmed herself.

"What's the matter? What's wr…" she stopped herself as she looked to the boy who was groaning as his heart rate accelerated slightly. His head started lolling from side to side as he tried to open his eyes. The nurse ran to his immediately and began checking his vitals.

As soon as Kate assured herself that Humphrey was being looked after, she bolted out of the room and back into the hallway where she belonged.

At that moment, Lily and Charlie were walking back with cups of coffee in tow. At the girl's rattled appearance, they both jumped to attention.

"Kate, what's wrong?" Lily asked as she rushed to put a hand on her sister's shoulder comfortingly, almost spilling her hot drink in the motion. Charlie likewise followed her and looked at the blonde curiously.

Struggling to catch her breath, Kate sputtered, "It's Humphrey…h-he…he's waking up!".

 **A/N: This is the part where I wish that you enjoyed this chapter and I ask politely for reviews. It's also where I hope that you all had happy and peaceful holidays with your families. And it's also the part where I throw a fucking party because I am so happy that this story is finally going to lighten up again! Jesus, it's been forever. I've been waiting for this since chapter 9. Ugh, I'm ecstatic! I can't promise anything, but one of the reasons that I've been taking so long with chapters recently is because the story is really upsetting (by design), but now that it can start climbing back up again, it'll be easier on me which may mean faster updates. Possibly. It's could, hypothetically happen. No guarantees. I'm no good at promises. :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**

 **p.s. in that author's note is the only bad word of this chapter. Just one has to be a record for me and my sailor's mouth! :D**

 ***If you didn't pick up on it, that is the exact same thing Humphrey thought to himself when he sang the song. Just thought that I should make that clear. And yes, I am in fact pretentious enough to quote myself. Deal with it :)**


	25. New Beginnings

_**The Value of a Life**_

Chapter 25 _New Beginnings_

 **A/N:**

 **There is no chapter 25 for TVOL. I'm sorry to disappoint. It's been far too long with far too little word from me. I must admit that feel guilty about this, but there has been a lot going on with me, still is in fact. Because of this and about a million more reasons, I'm ending TVOL here.**

 **Chapter 24 was posted on New Year's Eve at around 1 o'clock in the morning. I didn't know it then, but a lot was going to change for me, starting this year.**

 **2015 was by far the worst year in my entire existence. I don't particularly want to talk about it much anymore, but most of you, I'm sure, can guess why. If not, read my author's notes for this story. I made a promise to myself to make 2016 better for me, not that it could possibly be any worse.**

 **Anyway, many of you know that among the changes that are coming into my life is the decision to enlist in the United States Marine Corps next January, something that I've talked about in other stories but have yet to announce here. I feel that it is something that would help me, as a person, greatly and that it is also something I have always wanted to do. Following this decision, I have tapered off of my medication and am working towards physically and mentally preparing myself for the military as best I can. These past few weeks have been the best of my life in a long time, a real, genuine happiness that comes from being just me. I have a good deal of confidence that this is what I was meant to do.**

 **In relation to this story, I have had so much trouble figuring out where to go with the actual Chapter 25, following where Humphrey wakes up in the hospital. I couldn't do it. Something about writing this feels different than when I was working on all the other chapters. I think this has to do with the change in tone.**

 **As the story moves from this quite literally depressing mood to something far better, I feel as though this was the most fitting place to end the story. I feel as though this is where the defined conflict ends and that this is the most natural stopping point. Additionally, it is already the size of a fairly long novel.**

 **I would also like to emphasize that I do not want to have to think of the story as I have been for TVOL. As of right now, it's a testament to the darkest parts of my life, something I personally don't like to look at much. With my sort of "turning over a new leaf" so to speak, I don't want to have to be so emotionally involved in this area. I'm happy now and I don't want to go backwards.**

 **What this means is that there is never going to be another chapter of TVOL, BUT…I am starting a sequel. I have already begun the first chapter, an adaptation of what was going to be this one. I'm not sure what I will call the new story, but it is going to be a hell of a lot more pleasant to read. This is a new start for me (even if it is still the same story universe), but I can only hope to take it further than TVOL. Wish me luck! :)**

 **-Nick (ncham9)**


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